anonymous asked:

Hi Tammy,my LDBF kept looking at other girls & can't stop watching pornographic materials that it's causing me insecurities & lowering down my self-esteem. Seems like I'm not enough for him to do that. It's causing me such heartache especially that we're far away from each other. I feel violated. It's just unnecessary. I'm not beautiful & perfect like those girls he kept watching for sure, but if he really loves me,I don't think he should do that in the first place. Need your advise, please :'(

If it’s really bothering you to this extent, you need to do two things:

Firstly, you need to realize that those girls are heeeeaaaavily done up and could even be edited in some cases. They are not the norm, just as girls as magazines aren’t the norm. You are beautiful in your unique way, just as all women are. My biggest piece of advice to you is to find a way to empower yourself and feel more confident in your own skin. 

Secondly, you need to talk to your boyfriend about this. He may not take you seriously at first if he thinks watching porn isn’t a big deal to anyone, but he’ll see that it bothers you and hopefully cut down on watching it if not totally stop. The very least he could do is to remind you how beautiful and special you are to him to help remind you why you shouldn’t feel so insecure. 

If he brushes you off at first and thinks you’re silly, don’t get mad and yell at him. Just explain it to him like you explained it to me. Maybe try write it out instead of speaking so you can edit your responses and be a little more careful with your words. Try your best to not be offensive or accusing. 

Bottom line, I think watching a bunch of porn is kind of lame when he should be fapping to his own girlfriend (if you don’t mind me being blunt and lewd LOL) and he should be mindful that it bothers you. 


Do you ever wish you were laying next to someone so bad but instead you fall asleep holding your phone looking at text they sent you

Why meeting someone online isn’t weird at all:
  • Our generation grew up with technology and the internet 
  • Since we all grew up with technology, we know all about internet safety.
  • If you’re going to meet in person, you’re going to sure as hell confirm their identity before you do so because you’re not an idiot
  • We aren’t naive enough to believe out of billions of people on the planet, our soulmate or even best friend is going to live next door. 
  • Joining blogging communities involves socialization 
  • Gaming online with thousands of people? You’re bound to click with someone
  • Everyone is connected through the interwebs 
  • It’s easier to find someone you relate to online compared to in person 
  • Not everyone is trying to catfish or abduct you
I can’t wait for the day until there is no distance between us.

10 things to appreciate in your LDR:

  1. You don’t always need to shave
  2. The texts you get from them make you smile at your phone like an idiot
  3. You still get butterflies just hearing their voice
  4. You get to have the cutest Skype dates
  6. You get to be a total romantic when writing letters and mailing them stuff
  7. You always get excited planning visits and talking about closing the distance someday
  8. Every visit is technically an adventure
  9. You really appreciate the little things that close distance couples overlook
  10. You know that if you survive the distance, you both can pretty much survive through anything
I get so lost in her details. The shape of her lips. The way her hair falls on her shoulders. The way the light brightens her eyes. The way her smile forms when she looks at me. Doesn’t matter who’s in the room, she’s all I see.
I love imagining things with you; like holding your hand while grocery shopping, or playing with your hair while we watch our favorite movie on Netflix. Kissing you in the middle of your sentence because you’re just so perfect in my eyes regardless of what you’re saying. Waking up every morning and asking myself how I got so lucky. It’s endless what I can picture with you.