laura i know you love her too

I just finished reading “Cosette” The Sequel to Les Miserables” by Laura Kalpakian. For those who do not know, this book is basically a 650-page (kinda shitty) fanfic that somehow was published as a real, purchasable book sometime in the 1990′s. Here are some of my favorite moments:

  • A quote from Javert: “Republican scum like you can’t overthrow the king of France. One day more and you’ll piss blood. I’ll meet you in hell.”
  • A quote from Valjean: “She is seventeen, too young to be in love. She is a child. This Marius, he is nothing to her. She wanted a puppy once and I said no and she got over it.”
  • Enjolras scrambles to the top of the barricade and just….screams SHIT!
  • For some reason in the whole barricade part in the beginning Combeferre is the ami that gets the most attention
  • The only amis that are mentioned are: Combeferre, Enjolras, Feuilly, and Courfeyrac. The only ami that gets mentioned beyond the 1832 barricade section is Feuilly because of the whole “vivent les peuples!” thing written on the wall of the Musain. Which, btw, the author always writes as “vive les peuples!”
  • Actually the author made up some OCs in the barricade section so there could be some barricade survivors for Marius and Cosette to interact with later in the book
  • “You will hang by your cock in hell.”
  • For some reason whenever Jean Valjean is mentioned in the first portion of the book, he is described as having large, powerful hands
  • Cosette had no sex education and so on her wedding night she asked Marius to teach her. And he just gestures to her boobs and says “this is a nipple.” It is the only thing he vocally says to her and then he is kissing her boobs and they go at it. I kid you not this is the big amazing wedding sex scene and the most notable line is “this is a nipple”
  • Remember the whole absolutely no sex education thing? Well they somehow have amazing sex all night long regardless
  • Azelma is the main antagonist in the book. Also she is ALWAYS referred to as Zelma. I don’t know where the A went. It’s gone forever I guess.
  • A quote from Thenardier: “I am one of those holy men. I can walk in shit, sit in shit, sleep in shit, eat shit, drink shit, and still my turds come out in perfect golden bricks.”
  • Marius regularly goes to prison like it’s a casual thing that happens often which is an inconvenience but you know what are ya gonna do
  • Marius and Cosette raise the biggest asshole of a son there is literally nothing redeeming about him
  • Azelma ‘Zelma’ Thenardier literally fucked Louis-Napoleon and had a child with him.
  • She named the child Eponine.
  • Azelma feels like she needs to take revenge against Cosette for the whole Marius thing and she basically uses her daughter Eponine II to fulfill that, as if ensuring Eponine II is successful will make ghost Eponine happy
  • Speaking of Eponine II there is an entire subplot where Azelma manages to force the son of Cosette and Marius to marry Eponine II……because she felt that her sister Eponine should have married Marius…… like, by marrying her daughter Eponine to a Pontmercy she’s fulfilling some kind of lost destiny shit. And also taking revenge against Cosette. Azelma is really freaky in this okay
  • Cosette disguises herself as an old beggar due to a mixture of political and economic reasons and calls herself “the plumed lark” when she is in her disguise. Weirdest superhero ever amiright
  • Marius sneaks out of prison dressed up as the plumed lark

i am not fucking with you. “this is a nipple” is probably the most iconic part of the book

anonymous asked:

Ok but do you know what Laura is saying when she yells at Logan???

i do!! her response to logan’s “why the fuck haven’t you talked” question is:

in spanish: ¿cómo pretendes que te hable si me insultas, si me gritas?!!!

in english: how do you expect me to talk to you if you insult me, if you yell at me!!

and then she rambles on and it’s hard to pick up, but it sounds like she’s repeating “how do you expect–”. i just really loved that line because not only is it funny, it really shows that laura is just as irritated and exasperated with logan as he is with her lmao. both stubborn as heck, runs in the family i guesS

anyways i know not everyone speaks spanish, but i just want laura’s spanish lines to be shared too, she’s not spouting off gibberish ya know! if anyone thats giffing the movie needs translation help i can lend a hand :o

Million Dollar Man

+Request: harry smut with harry as ur boss who’s been flirting with you and you’ve been teasing him a lot but u two haven’t had sex bc u know people would talk if they found out, but then he makes a really risky move that makes u change ur mind 

 A/N: Hey guys back with another imagine. I hope you guys like it because I worked super hard on this. I would love so much if you guys would leave feed back and tell me what you guys think of it. love you all and thank you! 

This one shot I based a bit off of and even named it from the original song called Million dollar man by Lana Del Rey. Go check out the song its so good, one of my favorites by her. 

 Working with Harry wasn’t as bad as it all really seems. Yes he may be strict and yes he may yell a lot but I just know that when you have to work with people that sometimes are idiots and don’t wanna do their work it is hard not to come off as a prick. Harry was a very smart man, he knew what he was doing and how to really become successful. I’ve only been working with Harry for about 3 months, it isn’t that long for you to base your perspective off of someone you barely know. But all of that aside, I has a crush on my boss. 

 He is so tall and strong and beautiful long curly hair. I just wanna run my hands through his hair and hear him moan to how good it feels. But there are a lot of other things I wanna do to him to hear him moan. I just wanna crawl under his desk and pull down his pants and suck his cock. I wanna hear him moan out my name so loud and to place his hand on the back of my head and push me down farther. I wanna look up and stare at his face while this is going down and see him roll his eyes back in his head and plead for more. I want him to finish in my mouth and to feel his cum run down my throat. But hes my boss so it would never happen.


Keep reading

“Said” is FINE! :)

There are several charts and lists making the rounds lately with alternatives to using “said.” Guys–I cannot stress this enough: THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH USING “SAID!” :) If you feel like you’re overusing “said,” it’s because you’re over tagging. That’s it. End of story.Which is not to say you should never use replacements for “said.” It’s just that you should use them sparingly and only when appropriate. Here are some things to keep in mind when using alternatives to “said”:

1) Beware of Non-Synonymous Words.

In other words, beware of words that aren’t synonyms of “said” or other speaking words.

Body Language Words:

Words like laughed, shrugged, frowned, trembled, and their synonyms are not words that have to do with speech. You can’t frown something. You can say something WHILE frowning. You can’t tremble something. You can say something WHILE trembling. You wouldn’t say: Ted stood in front of the class and trembled the alphabet. So, you shouldn’t say, “I’ll go in front of the class and recite the alphabet,” Ted trembled.

Speech hindering actions:

Words like smiled, gaped, bubbled, breathed, panted, sneezed–try saying a few sentences while doing any of these things. Bear in mind that “gape” means “open wide.” It’s pretty difficult, right? Not to mention it probably looks/sounds pretty silly.

Non-Speaking words:

Words like accepted, approved, brainstormed, puzzled, cross-examined, publicized, justified, beckoned, invited–are words that go hand-in-hand with talking, but they’re not words that relate to actually saying things. “We could go with a red one, a blue one, or one made of metal, or maybe wood?” Ted brainstormed. Or, “We’re remodeling our house,” Ted publicized. It just sounds weird.

2) Beware of Over-Complicated Words.

While it’s certainly fine to be ornate now and then, most of the time, simple and concise is much better. Words like asseverated, remonstrated, vociferated, equivocated, acknowledged, communicated, etc. are long and over-complicated. “We’re remodeling our house,” said Ted is a lot more concise than “We’re remodeling our house,” Ted vociferated. It’s fine once in a while, when the word choice really matters, but don’t get into the habit of it.

3) Beware of the “Instead of Said” Tennis Match

The only thing worse than: 

“We should go to the beach,” Denise said.

“I would love to,” said Laura.

“There’s a great beach in the next town,” Melissa said.

“I think I know the one you mean,” Denise said.


“We should go to the beach,” Denise announced.

“I would love to,” agreed Laura.

“There’s a great beach in the next town,” Melissa offered.

“I think I know the one you mean,” Denise stated.

4) Beware of Over Tagging

The problem with the examples in #3 isn’t the overuse of “said” or of alternatives to “said.” The problem is over tagging. When you’re writing dialogue, it isn’t necessary to put “he said” after every line that is spoken. Try using action instead:

Denise gazed out the window at the beautiful sunny day. “We should go to the beach.”

“I would love to,” Laura said, joining her at the window

Melissa picked up the travel guide from the dresser. “There’s a great beach in the next town.”

“I think I know the one you mean,” said Denise.

I hope that demystifies tagging a little bit for those of you who feel like you’re overusing “said” too much. :)

Have a writing question? I’d love to hear from you! Please be sure to read my ask rules and master list first or your question will not be answered. :)

Stars in His Eyes

Hi guys! I’m really sorry that I haven’t been posting as much, but school has been crazy busy! This is just a fluffy imagine that will totally have a part 2, so I hope you enjoy!💗

Stars in His Eyes
Tom kept his eyes trained on her while she wandered throughout the party with Laura. He knew that she would probably be safe because she was with their friend, but he just needed to make sure that nobody got too close to her and made her uncomfortable. Ever since Tom had known her, she had been almost painfully shy and had suffered from anxiety, especially in large crowds, so Tom just wanted to ensure that she was alright. She’d gotten swept away from him before, and Tom refused to lose her again.
The beer bottle in his hand was freezing cold and he longed to hold her hands between his own to warm up. Tom wanted to tell her how beautiful she looked tonight in her little sundress, with her hair curled into soft ringlets that hung down her exposed back. Her lips looked like rosy, red pillows and her eyelids were painted a shimmery, champagne color. Her cheeks were blushing and Tom didn’t know how, but the light enveloped her entire body, so wherever she went, she shined like an angel. He wanted to tell her all these things and more, but instead, he’d kept his mouth shut the best he could.
They weren’t together, they were merely friends. But, that being said, they were friends who brought each other hot drinks on cool days. They were friends who lent each other coats and snuggled together under blankets. They were friends who shared food off of the same plate and who held hands to cross the street. They were friends who fell asleep on the couch together while they stayed up all night watching films. They were friends who longed to be more.
Looking back over her shoulder, she glanced back to where Tom, Jacob and Harrison stood, their backs leaned up against a wall. She prayed Tom wouldn’t see her as her eyes flicked over his frame.
He looked so good, the best, she pondered. His jeans fit him impeccably and she wondered who’d helped him pick them out, because surely they deserved an award, and the buttons of his shirt strained against the broadness of his chest, forcing the lines of definition hidden beneath to be showcased to their fellow party-goers.
“Hey,” Laura’s sudden voice called out, cutting into her fantasy of simply walking up to Tom, and yanking him down to kiss her. “Let’s get another drink, yeah?”
Nodding her head, the girls rejoined hands and did their best to push through the crowded living room and into the kitchen to refill their cups.
Jacob nudged Tom’s shoulder when he saw that his friend’s attention was focused entirely on her retreating frame through the kitchen’s door. “Dude, this has to stop. You look like her stalker or some shit.”
Harrison snorted into his beer before agreeing, “Yeah, mate. It’s too much, if someone didn’t know the two of you, they’d probably fear for her life.”
Tom scoffed, shaking his head before taking a gulp of beer. “That’s not, I’m not, it’s not, it’s fine. Everything is fine. I’m just making sure that she’s- fuck, I mean they’re, okay.”
“For sure, dude, for sure.” Jacob said, making a point to roll his eyes. “Why don’t you just chug your beer, walk into the kitchen, and ask her out? You want to date her, and you’ve got to know that she wants to date you too.”
“I just,” Tom paused, diligently attempting to think of something eloquent to say, “I just don’t wanna do anything that is going to make her feel like it’s all going to fast. I heard her talking to Laura yesterday about how she thinks that the sweetest relationships are the ones that have had the most time to build themselves up.”
“Dude, you guys have had nearly a year to build up your relationship.” Harrison commented, shaking his head. “You’re both just looking for excuses to stay the same way.”
Tom did his best to ignore Harrison’s comment. He wasn’t not asking her out because he wanted their relationship to become totally and completely immobile, he wasn’t asking her out because he was scared that he would fuck everything up. Little did he know, she and Laura were having a similar conversation, but theirs was over glasses of pink wine.
“Tom looks to pretty right now,” She sighed dreamily. “He looks like Prince Philip brought to life. Too bad I’m not Sleeping Beauty.”
“If we keep drinking, we may as well be.” Laura giggled. “But seriously, what’s wrong with asking him out on a date? Y’all text all the time, you even speak on the phone, come to think of it, I can’t even recall a time where you guys haven’t been talking.”
“He’s just everything to me, I don’t know what I would do if he were to go away forever, you know? I can’t imagine waking up, knowing that he’s no longer apart of my life. He’s too important to me to risk it all for a relationship that may or may not work out.” She said, picking off her nail varnish.
“I know he’s important to you, but you must realize how important you are to him? He looks at you with stars in his eyes, and if you say that they’re just naturally twinkly, I swear to God.” Laura threatened.
Laura had met her in a thrift store and the pair had bonded over their love of cute, vintage, high-waisted mom jeans. They wandered through the entire store together, exchanged numbers and hung out twice before she had accidentally revealed what a massive Spider-Man fan she was.
When Laura had brought her onto set, she and Tom melded together and into one. Nobody knew quite what it was,but it was like the invisible hand of fate kept throwing them together.
She literally bumped into him the first time they met. Tom had held her in his arms longer than what would be deemed polite, and they had just stared at each other, completely mesmerized by the face in front of them. Then, Tom bumped into her at the craft service table, and then she ran into him as she was leaving the set. Again, the light of day seemed to melt into a faint dusk before he let her go. Then, for weeks later, Tom pestered Laura for her number. He needed to know her.
Now, after spending the summer, autumn, winter and spring together, Tom definitely knew her. He understood her, she littered all of his thoughts and his actions, and she very well could be likened to stars in his own, personal night sky.
After another two glasses of wine, she was absorbed by thoughts of Tom and wanted nothing more than to be curled up on his lap like a cat while he combed his fingers through her hair. Hiccuping her way out the door, she called out to Laura, “I’m gonna do, it’ll be done, and it’ll be by me. He’ll be done by me in the ways of asking out, and then everything will be like ‘Penelope,’ and he’ll kiss me, but I don’t have a pig’s nose?”
Laura rushed to her friend, hugging her into her arms, “You’re gonna do so great! He’s going to love you, and you’re going to be in love, and then everyone is going to say I told you so! Get out there and do it!”
Her legs wobbled as she parted groups of people in an attempt to find Tom. When she finally spotted him, she waved and called for his attention. “Tom, I found you! I got something in my mouth for you, to say to you!”
Tom raised his eyebrows as he placed his beer on the table and began to make his way over to her. Wrapping an arm around her waist, he said, “Jeez, darling, how drunk are you?”
Tucking her head beneath his chin and curling her fingers into the fabric of his shirt, she replied, “Oh, I’m not drunk at all! I’ve only had a few, actually a few means a small number of, and Laura and I finished a bottle and a half of wine, so i guess that would be more of a dyad of drinks?”
Tom called out to Harrison and Jacob, motioning for them to grab Laura from the kitchen so they could all head back home. Judging by her level of intoxication and description of how much the girls had to drink, Tom figured that this is when the party should end for them.
Guiding her out the door with a firm hand around her waist, he felt one of her hands stroke across his cheeks. “You’re so pretty.” She said, fingers still gliding over his skin.
Tom chuckled, she always got this way when she had too much to drink. “No, you’re so pretty. In fact, you’re prettier than all the princesses in the whole, wide world.”
“Laura and I were talking about you tonight. I think you look like Prince Philip and she thinks that I should ask you out. What do you think?” She asked when they’d finally felt the air’s cool breath fan across their faces.
“I think you’re drunk and talking shit.” Tom said, blowing on his hands and rubbing them up and down her arms while she leaned into his chest, fully supported by his touch.
“No, I am not!” She gasped out childishly. “I’ve been wanting you since the summer. Wanting, waiting, but you,” She booped him on the nose, “Have yet to give me a sign. Why haven’t you given me a sign? I wanna be with you, don’t you wanna be with me? Laura thinks you do.”
Tom shook his head and mumbled a quiet, “Let’s talk when you’re sober, baby. You don’t know what you’re talking about right now.”
He glanced down at the girl’s head that rested on his shoulder, and he felt her eyelashes tickling his skin. Tom wanted to believe he felt the love in her words, but he was afraid that it was just the wine he smelt on her breath. He decided that he would wait until morning, and maybe then some, to ask her what she meant.
The night sky may as well be colored in completely charcoal if she were to walk out of his life. His night sky would be no more, and all he’d have to remember her by would be a black hole.

The Psychology of Logan

Logan is the perfect movie. If you have not seen it and have plans to, please, read no further. Stop right now. Go into the movie without any spoilers from me. Then by all means, come back and read.

If you have already seen it, or for some reason do not plan to see it and still want to read on, then you may proceed.

Keep reading

Okay but think of how great of a 2nd dad Caliban would've been to Laura?

- Teaching her how to use silverware properly:
(‘Laura, you can’t use a fork to eat soup, love…fuck, Charles! How do you say fork in Spanish?!’)

- Fussing over Laura’s diet:
(‘She’s a growing girl, Logan. Healing from bullet wounds uses up an extra 600 calories a day, I’ll have you know…’)

- Encouraging her to express herself less violently:
(‘If you’re going to get all stabby, you can just take it outside, missy. I just darned that damned hole in the couch yesterday! There’s already one cat living here and he’s barely housebroken, no room for two…position fucking filled!’)

- Explaining what’s wrong with her shoplifting:
('You called too much attention to yourself, is all. Next time try blending into the shadows a bit more and maybe looking a little less like you’re trying to murderer somebody with your eyes’)

- Setting an example of 'green living’:
('TURN! OFF! THE! FUCKING! LIGHTS! Electricity doesn’t grow on trees - and also, I already apologized about stepping on your dollie, so stop trying to literally kill me!’)

- Enabling healthy conflict resolution:
('Your dad didn’t say one word to me over dinner tonight. I’m not his bloody slave, you know. Be a love and kick his arse with one of your foot claws and then tell him it’s from me?’)

- Respecting her elders:
('Just cheat on the next hand of gin you’re playing with Charles so it’ll be over faster, will ya? It’s way past his bedtime and we don’t need him getting cranky and wiping out all life forms within a ten block radius…myself, very much fucking included’)

Brad imagine - a fan defends you

Requested by an anon

Your eyes are fixed on Brad, watching as he talks to a group of fans on the street. You smile softly, seeing Brad and the fans all laugh and smile together. You feel slightly jealous that you’re so awkward around new people and can’t really join into the conversation, but it makes you happy seeing Brad interacting with fans. That’s one of your favourite things about him—how he treats and acts around his fans.

“You’re Y/N, right?” a girl says, looking to be a little younger than you.

You smile and nod. “Yup, that’s me.”

“You don’t deserve Brad,” she says suddenly, startling you by the bitterness in her voice.

You frown and glance to him. You can tell that he didn’t hear the girl. She was speaking lowly, and the two of you are a little away from the crowd. “I’m sorry?”

She frowns and folds her arms over her chest. “You’re just using him for his fame. You don’t deserve to date him. He’s way too good for you.”

Your frown gets larger and you feel an anxious feeling starting to form in your stomach. You hate confrontation and arguing in person. “Um … I don’t … I’m not using him for fame.”

“Yeah right.” She scoffs and rolls her eyes. “You’re not pretty, you’re not talented, and you’re not a nice person. You don’t have anything going for you, so you’re obviously trying to use Brad to make yourself liked and popular. Well, it’s not working.”

You bite your lip and look at Brad, hoping he’ll come over and save you from his horrible conversation. He’s still engrossed in his conversation, though. “I’m not using him for fame or popularity. I’m not using him at all. I love him.”

The girl laughs. “Whatever. I doubt he loves you back. How could anyone?”

“Hey,” another voice says from behind you. “Leave her alone.”

You look over and see another girl, this one looking older than the other, standing with her arms folded over her chest.

“This doesn’t concern you,” the first girl says.

“It concerns all of us fans,” the second girl replies. “As fans, we need to love and support the boys, no matter what they do and who they date. Y/N is a really nice person. She’s so sweet to everyone, and she’s so talented and passionate about her hobbies. She’s also so gorgeous, so stop picking on her and leave her alone.”

The other girl looks stunned, as if she didn’t expect to be called out. She opens her mouth but says nothing.

“If you don’t like Y/N, just keep your mouth shut and don’t associate with her. Nobody’s forcing you to like her, but you should at least respect her.” The new girl gives you a small smile. “I think Brad is really lucky to have Y/N. She makes him extremely happy.”

You feel your cheek heat up and you smile slightly. “Thank you.”

The first girl huffs and walks off angrily, obviously at a loss for words.

“Thank you,” you say again. “It was really nice of you to say those things.”

“No problem,” the girl says, grinning. “It’s our job as fans to protect The Vamps and their friends and families.”

You smile. “What’s your name?”

“Laura,” she says.

“Do you have a twitter?”

She nods and tells you her username.

You smile. “I’ll tell the boys what happened, and they can follow you.”

Her eyes grow wide and she smiles widely at you. “Oh my god, really?! Thank you so much!”

“You’re welcome. It’s the least I can do for standing up for me.”

Brad goes over to you and puts his hand onto your lower back. “Hey babe. Everything okay over here?”

You nod, smiling over at Laura. “Yeah, everything’s fine. Laura and I were just talking.”

Laura smiles and waves. “Hello again.”

Brad grins. “Hey. I saw another girl here. Where’d she go?”

You open your mouth to speak, but Laura speaks first. “I told her to stop being rude to Y/N and she left.”

Brad’s smile falls and he looks at you. “What was she saying?”

“It’s not important,” you mumble. “She was just being kind of ignorant and rude. It’s fine, it’s been handled thanks to Laura.”

Brad looks at her, a look of gratitude on his face. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Laura says, smiling sweetly. “It’s the least I can do after all that you and the boys have done for us.”

“I’m happy to know that there are some fans who don’t hate Y/N,” he says softly.

You bite your lip and take his hand, giving it a small squeeze.

Laura smiles. “I have to get going, but it was so lovely meeting you, Brad. Thank you for the pictures, and thank you for being so kind.” She looks at you. “I’m glad I ran into you, too.”

You give her a smile. “Likewise.”

She looks at Brad one last time before walking off.

“You know I love you,” Brad says quietly, “right?”

You look at him and nod slightly. “Yes, I do. You know I love you too?”

He nods. “Mhm. I just don’t want you to ever feel insecure or worried that I don’t love you or anything like that. Especially not because of girls who call themselves fans when all they do is send hate to you and the other girlfriends.” He kisses your temple and pulls you closer. “I love you so much, Y/N. No matter what anyone may say, never forget that you’re my one and only, and you mean the world to me.”

The Wrong Guy (Derek/Stiles)

Anonymous said: Derek/Stiles - “Are you meeting someone here? Because.. I think I’m that person.”

Nonnie! I hope you enjoy this one! Fic #26 in my 2017 Prompt Challenge

The Wrong Guy. Derek/Stiles. Teen. Also on AO3.

Stiles is having a drink at his favorite bar when a gorgeous guy says they’re supposed to be meeting. Stiles thinks Derek has the wrong guy, but Derek insists he’s the right one.

Rooney’s is a great place to get a drink after shifts end. It’s half-way between the subway station and his apartment, so Stiles will stop in several nights a week. Occasionally, one of his roommates will meet him for an early dinner, but Allison’s working third shift this week, Isaac is in the middle of his four-three, and Erica’s got a big work project that’s making her come home late all week.

Keep reading

New Life (Peter Parker X Fem!Reader)

Characters: Clint Barton X Daughter!Reader, Peter Parker X Fem!Reader

Universe: Marvel, Avengers

Warnings: Teasing


Request: How about one where the reader is Clints teenage daughter from a previous relationship before Laura. She’s kind of loner and a punk chick but keeps to herself. Laura sends her with her father to try to open her up and make some friends in the city. She ends up falling for peter cause she loves geeky guys.

Originally posted by jessikaort

Originally posted by srogersxbbarnes

You listened to your dad talking to your dad and step mom talk downstairs in the kitchen while you were on the steps. You lived with them since your dad got custody of you when your mom and he split. You didn’t mind Laura, she treated you alright, and sure your half siblings got on your nerves, but you liked them all the same. But you spent most of your childhood a single child so having siblings was alien to you. You liked your alone time. You would happily lock yourself away in your room and listen to rock music over a day out with your family.

Keep reading

Sterek Fic Rec

Foiled by Gimmie | M | Mating Run AU. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

The run is mandatory for omegas, but Stiles isn’t going to let an alpha claim him. He just has to get through four annual runs without being caught, and he’ll be free to be his own omega for the rest of his life.

Genderless by Silkypaws (Mrs_Bored) | TauA | Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

“…No way! Really?” His annoyance was soon forgotten; Stiles was too busy gaping at his best friend, with his eyes wide open.
Mc Call beamed and puffed out his chest, confirming the unspoken question: he had finally presented as an Alpha.
The Sheriff’s son was very happy for him. Very, very happy. The only problem was, he still hadn’t fucking presented as anything. He and Scott had bonded over being late bloomers and now…Stiles was one of the few genderless freaks in high school.
It was just perfect. Perfectly pathetic, since he also had a legendary crush on the hottest Alpha ever created: Derek Hale.

We Grew A Little And Knew A Lot *** by noxlunate | E | Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

 “So, you do like me though?”-“No, I hate you and I’ve spent a ton of time and money trying to make you happy for no reason at all.” Derek deadpans and Stiles can’t help it, he smiles blindingly at Derek and leans in, smashing their mouths together.

Operation FOIDLMBISMGAEM *** by noxlunate | NR | Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Stiles puts Operation Find Out If Derek Loves Me Before I Spill My Guts And Embarrass Myself into effect the next day. Scott tells him he’s ridiculous and the name is too long when he texts him about it, but Scott could barely talk to Allison for months when they first met so he’s in no place to judge. Sequel to We Grew A Little and Knew A Lot.

Strong Alpha, Strong Pups *** by Snare | E | Magic Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Omegas are weak. Stiles is an Omega, but Stiles has magic. Stiles is strong. Stiles is strong, so Alpha needs to be stronger. Strong Alpha, strong pups.

You Smell Like Mine by bleep0bleep, marguerite_26 | E | Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

People talk about the alpha instinct, an alpha’s head being swayed by a nice-smelling omega, or the desire to drop everything and show off. Derek’s never felt any of that. He’s just not that kind of alpha. Then he meets Stiles.

Colors by LoveActually_rps | GA | Soulmates AU 

When soulmates visit the same place on the same day, they can see color in the places where the other has been.
It allowed you a world full of color for one single day. A day.
The universe was cruel like that.
It gave soulmates a single day to find each other and seal the bond between them permanently or the color would vanish forever… and so would the bond.

Dangerous Liaisons by eeyore9990 | E | Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

“Stiles is in heat! Did you hear me?” Scott practically screamed, but it was too late. Somewhere in the panicked rush of Scott’s warning, Stiles had gotten to the door, yanking it open and then just standing there, letting the doorway frame him to maximum effect. “Hey, Derek,” Stiles murmured, voice sultry and dripping with pure sex.

Inevitability (About Damn Time) *** by  accordingtomel | E | 

“So?” Scott says. “So?” Stiles sputters, kicking his shoes into the corner and locking the front door behind him. He’d whipped out his phone the second he’d pulled up to the house, and miracle among miracles, Scott actually answered. Of course, he’s not so pleased about that now. “My dad thinks Derek and I are dating, Scott. Did you miss that part?” The asshole actually has the audacity to laugh. As if this is somehow hilarious to him. Worst best friend ever. “No, I didn’t.” - “This is not funny, Scott.” - “Yeah, it actually kind of is, though.”

Just Realize What I Just Realized *** by literaryoblivion | TauA | 

He’s never noticed it before; it’s always just been second nature to him these days, does it out of habit, but it’s not until he stops to actually think about it that it becomes abundantly and embarrassingly clear to him that he is in love with Stiles and that they are practically dating without the actual dating part…

Lunches, Knitting and Definitely Not Dating *** by noxlunate | TauA | M-Preg Stiles. Deputy Derek

“So, I uh, managed to get myself pregnant.” - “You what?!” - “Got myself pregnant. Y’know, up the duff, knocked up, a bun in the oven, in a family way, eating for two, with child. I could go on Dad, really, stop me before I exhaust the list of pregnancy euphemisms. There’s still caught an 18 year STD, my eggo is preggo, building a person-“ - “Stiles.” - “Hosting a parasite, harboring a fugitive-“ (Just a weird mpreg fic with Derek and Stiles totally kinda dating without realizing it, and Stiles figuring out this whole having a baby thing.)

May I Interest You in an Apology Muffin? *** by @leslieknopeismyspiritanimal | NR | Different Meeting AU

  ‘i didn’t want to tell my friend who my real date last night was so i just pointed at a random stranger (you) but now they’re storming over to interrogate you and you’re playing along??? okay’ au

Shadows and Soda Cans by vampireisthenewblack | E | Human Stiles.

What so many of Stiles’ friends forget, is that while he’s only human, he notices things they don’t. They’ve got all these supernatural senses, they read fear and deception and arousal and dominance, but they don’t look with their eyes. They rely too much on that other stuff,and don’t see what’s right in front of them. [The one where Stiles knows Derek creeps into his bedroom at night and decides to give him a show.]

Ten Feet Off the Ground *** by Leslie_Knope | E | Different Meeting AU. Human Stiles. 

“Oh my god, you reek,” Laura says, waving her hand in front of her nose dramatically. “Get away from me. Right now. I never want to know what your desire smells like. Gross, gross, gross.” (Or: the one in which Derek and Stiles meet in a bar, and it’s basically love at first sight.)

Void ab initio by Leslie_Knope | E | Grew Up Together AU.

“We were best friends in middle school and promised (signed a contract and all) if neither of us were in a relationship when we turn 30, we’d marry each other. You moved 5 years later and I haven’t seen you since but you just reached out on my 30th birthday to find out if I’m single. Minors can’t be held to contracts but puberty hit you like a truck and I just broke up with my long term boyfriend a month ago so what the hell I might as well catch up with you.”

Untitled *** by @braedens  | NR | 

Stiles and Derek are the opposite of the stereotypical couple that act lovey-dovey around their friends, but then argue left and right when they’re alone.

Are You The One? *** by Venrajade | TauA | Game Show AU. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Derek’s sister works for a television network with a dating show that claims that they are able to find someone’s True Mate. Cora steals a scent sample from Derek and matches him to an Omega applying to the show with a 99% chance of them being mates. Which means Derek is now a reality dating show star. Shit.

Gentle Mornings by Dechimo | TauA | Established Relationship. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Kisses on his neck. Stubble on his shoulder. The rising sun in his face.

Sweeter Than Honey *** by the_painless_moustache | E | Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Stiles is probably the worst omega ever, which drives every one of his friends insane. Except for, surprisingly, Derek.

Bats and Bikes by hazelNuts | TauA | Biker Bar AU. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

‘Nice ass,’ the guy leers.
Stiles ignores the comment. He’s an Omega who owns a biker bar, he’s heard worse. The comments had lessened after mating with Derek, most people having the decency not to hit on a claimed Omega.

Can Life Be Perfect Please *** by Sensei_Briefs | E | Mating Run AU. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Stiles is an omega so his life is hard and sucks more than anyone he knows, and on top of that he turned 18 this year. Legal mating age. He isn’t ready, nor does he want to run in the annual mating run that happens in the arena on the edge of town every year, but he has too. It’s the law. He not just scared, but terrified at the outcome. It determines the rest of his life. He might be able to outrun alphas and betas the whole time, but with his luck, probably not. His life is just…perfect.

Courting Nerves by ohhitsanna | TauA | Alpha Derek. Omega Stiles.

Stiles just rolled his eyes, smiling hugely. “Sure big guy, whatever you want.” Derek’s heart was beating so fast he was seriously worried it might explode. Stiles actually wanted Derek to court him, was this a dream? “Whoa there, Derek.” Stiles eyes were wide with fear staring down at his leg. Oh God did he have a boner? Now was not the time for that!… Or the one where Derek Courts Stiles.

Freebies *** by Saucery | TauA | Coffee Shop AU. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Stiles can’t figure out why people keep dropping, spilling or breaking things in his presence. And offering him free stuff. Like, what the heck?

He’s Just Knot That Into You *** by aggybird | M | AO3 account is required to read this. | He’s Just Not That Into You AU. Human Stiles. Werewolf Derek.

Stiles doesn’t have much luck finding Mr. Right, and Derek the bartender hears all about it. 

I’ll Take Care Of You (No Matter What) by AlexandriteWard | E | Underage | Author asked not to reveal Genders.

“Yes.” Derek groaned. “Yes I felt it. I still do.” He closed his eyes again. “This is an unbelievably stupid idea.” He said as he pressed himself closer and put his hands on Stiles’ hips. “Our parents will probably kill us.” Stiles agreed, gasping as he lifted himself up and pulled off his shirt and boxers.

Irreplaceable Sorrow, Irreplaceable Joy *** by RTSideStories | E | True Mates AU. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Derek Hale knows his life has been amazing. Blessed from the day he was born with an amazing pack, amazing friends, and amazing parents, each day is a new adventure to look forward to. Especially when he comes to Beacon Hills, the town that will eventually be given to him as his territory. Everything had gone so well, until he met “Genim "Stiles” McCall", a human with absolutely no emotion or feeling, the old Alpha’s adopted son. Which, of course, out of everyone in the world, also had to be the mate that his wolf wanted. Great, just what he needs. A sourpuss fucking up his day. (Or the one where Derek’s life was daisies and rainbows and Stiles had the traumatic childhood.)

Like James Dean, Only Sadder by 42hrb | TauA | BAMF Stiles. Jock Derek. | High School AU

The star of the Beacon Hills High School baseball team and Beacon Hills resident bad boy probably have nothing in common, right?

Looks Can Be Deceiving by literaryoblivion | E | Alpha Stiles. Omega Derek.

Derek wouldn’t say he’s an unobservant person. He’s good at taking in his surroundings, analyzing a situation enough to know whether he should stay or leave for his own comfort. But when he drives to and from work, his world becomes the inside of his car, and his thoughts turn to the errands or projects he has to do rather than looking at the countless advertisements and billboards he drives past. That is until he notices something from the corner of his eye as he’s stuck in rush hour traffic on the way home.

Of Debutantes and Dashing Dreamboats by missmagoo | M | Omega Derek. Alpha Stiles.

Derek is a debutante. Stiles is a cocky party-crasher from the public high school.

Of First Times and Falling In Love by missmagoo | E | Omega Derek. Alpha Stiles.

Sequel to Of Debutantes and Dashing Dreamboats, Debutante Verse. “Do you want to have sex with me?” Derek asks, feeling shy and exposed even as the words are leaving his mouth. Stiles’ head shoots up, and he stares dumbly at Derek for a few moments, pen falling out of his mouth and onto the comforter with a barely audible thump. “Wait, really?” Stiles asks.

Of Babies and The Making of Them by missmagoo | E | Omega Derek. Alpha Stiles.

Third installment of the Of Debutante Verse. Derek just went through a full heat - with a very attentive partner - completely unprotected. Statistically speaking, he’s either pregnant, or should seriously consider making an appointment with a fertility specialist.

Oh. *** by Halegirl06 | M | High School AU | Alpha Stiles. Omega Derek.

“Well, who is it?” Derek paused. “U-Um… An alpha?” he hinted, nervous. “Am I going to have to guess?” Stiles teased. Derek looked down, smiling before he nodded. “Okay, alpha. Is he in our grade?” Derek nodded. “Do I know him?” He nodded again. “Okay… Hmm… How well do I know him?” he asked. “U-Um, re-really well,” Derek offered. Stiles furrowed his eyebrows. “Is it Scott?” Derek shook his head vehemently. “So it’s someone who’s single?” Derek nodded. “Isaac?” That was the only person he could think of. Derek shook his head. “Then who else would - ” It dawned on him. “Oh.”

Say It With Me (Don’t Assume) by KuriKuri | E | Alpha Derek. Omega Stiles.

Derek knows way too much about how omega heat suppressants work now, after having been partnered with Stiles for as long as he has. They’re probably his favorite thing to bitch about whenever they’re stuck on a stakeout. Of course, omegas on the force aren’t required to take them. Derek’s never really understood why Stiles does, if he hates them so much, especially –– especially because he’s bonded.

Sweet Relief *** by Muzik_Freak | E | True Mates AU. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Stiles, an omega, wants children desperately, and he will go to any length to achieve his dream. He decided a glory hole was the perfect answer for his desires. All he wanted was for an alpha to impregnate him, nothing more. Sometimes plans don’t always go as planned.

Tell Me You Love Me, I’ll Take The Pain Away by ohhitsanna | TauA | Underage, Derek is 10 Years older than Stiles. | True Mates AU | Alpha Derek. Omega Stiles.

“Alpha! Alpha! Alpha!” Derek whips his head around to see none other than his young Mate, Stiles Stilinski, bounding as gracefully as a baby deer towards him. His awkward and too-big-for-him limbs tripping him up slightly as he hurries over. Stiles small body crashes into him and it shouldn’t have made Derek topple over, but he knows what joy it brings to Stiles when he pretends Stiles is stronger than him. Derek falls on to the grass with a thud, Stiles landing directly on top of him, giggling in a way only a five year old wolf could. “Alpha.” Stiles hums, rubbing his small face into Derek’s neck. Derek rumbles in response, his arms immediately wrapping around the slender child and hold him as he rubs his scent into the boy’s hair. It’s been much too long since they’d last seen each other and he can’t help but want to erase everyone else’s scent from the boy. Stiles giggles as Derek flips them over, caging in Stiles small frame and rubbing up against his body. “Mine.” Derek growls as he continues his scenting. “My Mate.”

The Chase *** by saltandbyrne | E | Soulmate/True Mates AU | Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Derek’s fourth Chase will be his last if he doesn’t catch an omega this time. He’s starting to doubt this whole soul-mate thing anyway, at least until someone from his past shows up and gives him the run of his life.

The Little Glass Button by AlexandriteWard | TauA | Cinderella AU | Omega Derek. Alpha Stiles.

“Scott, I love you like a brother, but come on. Why in the world would an omega ever pick me? Let alone an omega prince? I may be an alpha, but the chance of me getting the prince’s attention is non-existent. Non-existent.” 

Through the Breaks in the Foliage by cloadsarefluffy | M | Mating Season AU. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

In a less than traditional society, werewolves behave more like actual wolves rather than their human counterparts. This means that they have dynamics and drives just like the wild animals they take after. Because of that, there’s mating seasons and even an instinctual drive to make a pack of one’s own for both alphas and omegas. After all, it’s why Stiles has slaved himself over his small (but adequate, mind you) den out in the wild expanse of the woods. It’s just a good thing that all of his laborious efforts get noticed by the right alpha named Derek.

To Fill a Home by cloudsarefluffy | E | Alpha Derek. Omega Stiles.

Stiles could care less what they say, he was truly happy with how his life was going. He was mated to a possessive, providing alpha named Derek Hale, now heavily pregnant with his first pup, and studying hard to get his degree to become a professional stay-at-home dad. What was so wrong with that?

Unexpected by neo_trickster | E | Alpha Derek. Omega Stiles.

Stiles hasn’t presented yet, and it’s driving him crazy. He’s 17, almost 18. He’s like 5 years past due. His dad’s even asked him to go see a specialist. This is getting ridiculous if you ask him.

Morning Sunshine! by neo_trickster | E | Alpha Derek. Omega Stiles.

Sequel to Unexpected. The morning after Stiles’ heat. “Stiles slowly grins, before glancing behind himself and seeing messy black hair and part of his mates face. His mate. Stiles lays his head back down on the pillow, keeping his internal squealing internal. Hence why it’s called internal. Because he’s not letting a peep out. Nope. Not one bit for Derek to possibly hear”

A series of unfortunate blind dates by jazzyhandsy | M | Alpha Derek. Omega Stiles.

Derek is set up on blind dates by his sister Laura, and of course they go terribly wrong. Lucky Stiles the waiter is there to mock him.

Purely Wanton by iofbeholder | E | Werewolf Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Newly turned Stiles starts experiencing unexpected changes to his body and a need he’s never fathomed before. Or the one where Derek turns Stiles, and Stiles goes in to heat. Derek interrupts Stiles and his “monster” of a sex toy. Stiles gets a satisfying conclusion. So does Derek.

Scent Left Unsaid by bleep0bleep | M | AO3 account required to read. | Human Stiles. 

In a society where werewolves are second class, Deucslist is an alternative werewolf network (similar to Craigslist) where humans and werewolves offer (mostly sexual) services. Derek is a long-term client of an anonymous human omega whose scent is just perfect. He never expects to meet him, until it happens.

Summer Contest *** by kits_lightening | E | Different Meeting AU. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

The moment Derek stepped into the fighting ring and faced Stiles he remembered why he was doing all of this. The omega gawked at him and barely paid attention to the other competitors Talia was mentioning and Derek smiled at the thought of having all of his attention. Stiles blushed from the tips of his ears to his neck and began to run his fingers through his hair while looking away. Derek began to wonder how far down that blush traveled when he shook his head and tried to focus on the imminent battle. He caught the last of what his mother was saying. “—have a good fight and good luck.” More clapping and the horn that signaled the beginning of the fight sounded.

Waiting Games *** by Jerakeen | E | AO3 account required to read. | Royal AU. Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Being an only child and heir to the throne, Stiles had always known he may not have the luxury of marrying for love. When he’d realized he was an omega to boot, things had taken an even more uncomfortable turn for him. Omegas are rare. An omega as the heir apparent is almost unheard of. Which is why there is no wiggle room when it comes to the tournament.

hope you know (i won’t let go) by allhalethekings | GA | Werewolf Stiles

Derek goes in, ready for a fight, ready for the worst, but freezes at the sight of Jackson and Isaac holding a fighting Stiles down as Scott flashes his eyes at him. Allison and Lydia are standing off to the side, concerned expressions on their faces. Time slows down and it takes Derek longer than he’d care to admit to realize a few things.

First, Jackson and Isaac are also back in Beacon Hills. From the looks of it, they’ve been back for a while. And they’re holding Stiles down, struggling to hold him down.

Second, Scott is looming over Stiles, baring his fangs menacingly.

Third, Stiles is…doing the same at Scott.

That’s when his brain resets itself and Derek comes to a thunderous fourth realization. Stiles is a werewolf.

Suddenly, time speeds up again and six pairs of heads swivel in his direction but Derek only stares at Stiles. Stiles who pauses, closes his eyes, takes a deep breath in Derek’s direction. He opens his eyes, electric blue orbs glowing, and growls, “Mate.”

And well - what.

Smell Your Intentions *** by redeyedwrath | TauA | Werewolf Stiles

“The worst thing about suddenly turning into a werewolf is Stiles’ asshole of an Alpha”

Or, in which Stiles gets bitten instead of Scott and he can’t figure out what the hell that smell is

Bad Moon Rising by maypoison | M | Supernatural-Teen Wolf Crossover | Destiel 

“So two humans, an Angel and a Alpha walk into the woods looking for a dangerous, rogue and feral werewolf. What could possibly go wrong, right?”

“Stiles … shut up.”

Stiles Stilinski cursed the day he met Scott McCall. If he hadn’t met Scott, then he wouldn’t have met broody werewolf Derek Hale, and ended up being dragged along on a week long road trip looking for a feral werewolf. Despite his annoyance at the situation, Stiles knew they needed to help. After all, if it wasn’t them who found it, then it would be Hunters, and neither of them wanted that to happen …

Sam Winchester didn’t really understand why his elder brother Dean insisted that he and the Angel Castiel had to suddenly go hunting for some rogue werewolf. He wanted to help, but his brother had insisted that they could take care of it easily, and be back at the Bunker soon. With the Mark of Cain affecting Dean, Sam knows that he desperately needs to blow off some steam, and apparently taking Castiel along on a hunt for a feral monster was the perfect remedy.

Beacon Hills Werewolf Mafia by polarNoboriryu | TauA | Supernatural-Teen Wolf Crossover

Dean sat down hard behind the wheel of the Impala as Sam slid in the other side. They just sat there for a second, Dean looking slightly bewildered and Sam rubbed a hand through his hair. It was Sam who broke the silence.

“Well… that was weird.”

“You mean the part where a bunch of teen werewolves hunted us down, hogtied us like a bunch of amateurs, dragged us to a police station, interrogated us, and then told us to leave town?”

Sam frowned, nodded. “That would be the weird part yeah.”

“So… what do we do now?” Dean asked, looking absently as the Beacon Hills town sign.

Don’t Be Afraid by captainahmedica | TauA | 

When Jackson traps Stiles in a locker after school, he stumbles across Derek struggling to control his shift. With their budding relationship already strained due to Jackson’s bullying, the discovery threatens to end them before they even start.

Flesh and Bone *** by theinspiredginger | TauA | Supernatural-Teen Wolf Crossover | Destiel

Dean’s trapped in Purgatory looking for his angel when a not so subtle kid in a red sweatshirt asks to team up. Dean takes Little Red Riding Hoodie underneath his wing as they try to escape.

Or the one where Stiles bargains with a witch to get sent to purgatory to save Derek and finds Dean instead. They work together to find a way out of Purgatory as they each look for their “person”.

Howling in the Moonlight *** by Fanfiction_Is_Literature | TauA | Werewolf Stiles

Teen Wolf if Stiles had been the one to get bitten.

Let me take care of you *** by LillianDeLooney | M | M-Preg

Stiles is six months pregnant with Derek’s babies when his mate gets home as a teenager, somehow having gotten de-aged again. Their mate bond is still strong, however, and all Derek wants to do is take care of Stiles…

Love Tied! by wolfsbite92 | E | 

Stiles & Derek are kidnapped and tied up in the most unfortunate circumstance and Stiles gets hard!

Nacho Fortune *** by LillianDeLooney | M | M-Preg

Whoever thought it was a good idea to mix Mexican food and fortune cookies needs to be damned to the darkest place of Hell. Why, you ask?

Funny story …

Or: the one where Derek gets de-aged again, somehow gets Stiles pregnant, and they have to live with the consequences.

Only Fools Do What I Do *** by CharWright5 | E | Omega Stiles. Alpha Derek

It had seemed like a simple plan, a way for everyone to get what they want: pretend to be Bond-Mates so Derek could get the teaching job he wanted, while Stiles didn’t have to face living with a total stranger at college and have it be known that he was suffering from night-terrors. Only things weren’t that simple. Because they were Mates, a fact Derek was hiding due to Stiles’ determination not to have one and his need for independence, as well as his Alpha-aimed anger at his lack of freedom. But the longer they live together, the more Derek finds himself falling for the Omega, and the harder it is for the Alpha to resist the alluring scent of his Mate.

Somehow it was Still Scott’s Fault by i_amtheoutlaw | E | M-Preg

Stiles didn’t believe Derek. He didn’t believe any of the wolves. Screw their stupid mutt-noses.
That was, until he started showing.
Stiles woke up one morning looking stuffed, the next morning looking bloated, and the morning after that he had a full on bump going on.
It was true.
Stiles was gonna be a mommy.
And if that wasn’t the scariest friggin’ thing that ever happened within the Beacon Hills county lines.

Stiles The Teen Wolf Season One *** by AkemiAsh | M | Werewolf Stiles

What if it hadn’t been Scott. What if it’d actually been Stiles who was bitten that night? When the werewolf shoe was on the other foot, Stiles isn’t the one supporting anymore, he is the one who needs support, but with Allison Argent capturing Scott’s attention, who will support the newly turned werewolf? Sterek Werewolf!Stiles Human!Scott

Tell Me A Lie by MellytheHun | E | Werewolf Stiles

Peter had bitten Stiles and after his death Stiles is Alpha (He killed Peter or else). So. Derek and Scott are not automatically his pack. But he needs it. So comes to them to make the pack. And Derek is confused and scared. he doesn’t understand how Stiles can be his Alpha, but being next to him feels more pack then Peter and Laura were.

The Time John Stilinski Learned To Knock by 42hrb | M |

John Stilinski comes home from a long shift and just wants to relax, then he hears a noise coming from Stiles’ room.

Welcome to the Pack, Omega by alisvolatpropiis | E | Different Meeting AU | Werewolf Alpha Stiles. Omega Derek

Derek Hale is a wandering Omega looking for a pack to call his own. When he comes into Beacon Hills, he’s intercepted by the local pack. They take him to their Alpha who Derek is expecting to be an older werewolf. What he’s not expecting is for this kid that can’t be more than 20, with the smirk playing about his kissable looking lips, to be the Alpha. Needless to say, they don’t exactly get off on the right foot. But, Derek thinks later that night, he could easily find his home in Beacon Hills with Stiles Stilinski and his pack.

You Make My Heart Shake, Bend and Break *** by ChloeWeird | M | Trigger Warning: Alcohol Abuse/Domestic Violence

Derek and Stiles are childhood friends, close as brothers. They promise never to leave each other, but life has a way of making you break promises you always intended to keep.

An AU following the vague plot of Troye Sivan’s Blue Neighbourhood Trilogy, but with a happier(and more conclusive) ending. And werewolves.

Full Homo, Bro by crossroadswrite | TauA | High School AU

(317): Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he’s going to take this week.
“How about gay chicken,” Danny suggests.

Stiles snaps his attention towards him and glares. He seriously has to pick better friends. Friends who don’t suggest he play gay chicken with his current, permanent and embarrassing crush.

Derek Hale, aforementioned crush, part time douchebag and owner of the best everything, scoffs, “Yeah right. Like Stilinski could handle that for a week.”

Scent Marking For Dummies by Hatteress | TauA | Human Stiles

Stiles is almost used to being chased around the school by werewolves at this point. Having to share a bed with Derek freaking Hale, on the other hand, is just needlessly complicating his life.

Seriously, it’s like your photoshopped. *** by nevermetawolf | TauA | Crazy, Stupid, Love AU

“Oh my god,” Stiles squeaks out again. “You’re unbelievable.”

Hot Bar Guy bobs his head agreeably. “I’ve been told that before, though usually people are more out of breath and less clothed when they say it.”

Tell Me You’ve Had Enough (My Dear We Still Have Everything) by crossroadswrite | TauA | M-preg Omega Stiles. Beta Derek

(952): What’s the best day of the week to potentially find out you’re pregnant with your ex’s baby?
(+44): He’s so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he’d be like “I just want you to be happy”
“So,” he starts, pressing his lips together like he only does when he’s trying really hard not to cry. “What’s the best day of the week to potentially find out you’re pregnant with your ex’s baby? Because I feel like Thursday night sucks as a day to find that out.”

When I said I wanted someone to fall for me, this isn’t what I meant by crossroadswrite | GA |

(801):The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
“I don’t deserve this,” Stiles moans, dropping his head to the table, “It’s the fifth time this week you scare someone away, Erica. Do you want me to die a virgin? Is that it. What did I ever do to you.”

Erica flags the waiter and orders another milkshake, asks for two straws, “She wasn’t right for you.”

(Or: the one where Cora and Erica keep cockblocking Stiles because they know exactly who the right person for him is.)

Honey Eyes and a Wolf’s Heart (Series) by Underestimated_amateur | NR | Growing Up Together AU | 8-year Age Gap | True Mates | Fox Stiles | Series is unfinished.

Here’s the story of a werefox named Stiles and a werewolf named Derek. They’ve always been mates, even when they didn’t know it.

Long Overdue by tangowhiskey | E | M-Preg

Stiles is pregnant with Derek’s pups. However, he’s now overdue, making him tired and irritable. He wants nothing more than for Derek to have sex with him in the hope that it will induce labour. Derek may or may not love the idea.

Romancing The Sourwolf. (Or, Stiles Stilinski’s 100% Foolproof Guide To Getting Your Man.) *** by lucyinthesoupwithcroutons | TauA | 

The 15 year plan for Lydia was clearly the wrong way to go; Stiles won’t be making the same mistake with Derek. He decides to do his homework this time.

Bet On It by IDreamOnlyOfYou (lauren3210) | M | Coworkers AU

Stiles is an RN and Derek the attending trauma surgeon at Beacon Hills Hospital. They’re constantly arguing, much to the amusement of their colleagues, who ultimately decide to take bets on when the sexual tension will finally explode. The only question is, who will win the jackpot?

I Want To Say Yes, Sir *** by Wheresmymadmaninabox | E | Young Derek. High School AU.

“I’ve got a 17 year old boy in the back of my car and I’m running him up to the station.” His dad sighs.

“Oooo is he cute?” Stiles asks jokingly.

Stiles can practically hear his Dad’s eye roll. He can hear the Sheriff shift as he turns around to look at the boy in the back. “Hey my son wants to know if you’re cute.”

He hears the boy on the other end go after a second of hesitation, “I want to say yes, sir.”

His Dad just cracks up laughing.

I’ve Been Everywhere With You *** by Leslie_Knope | E | 

“Dude, you should totally come with me.”

“What? Like on the road trip?“

“No, come with me. To Austin. Get out of Beacon Hills.”

Derek paused. “What?” he asked again.

Ring Around the Roses (Series) by exclamation | GA | Established Relationship | Series is marked unfinished.

When John Stilinski got a call about someone acting suspiciously in a jewelry store, he didn’t expect to find Derek Hale looking at engagement rings. Despite all the dangers Derek has faced, somehow buying a ring is his most challenging battle.

Alone Together *** by asocialfauxpas (fuzzytomato) | E | Merman Stiles. Wolf Sailor Prince Derek. | AO3 account required to read

Derek has lost his pack. Stiles has lost his pod. They find each other on the high seas.

an awful curse by leak k (blinkiesays) | TauA |

Isaac is asleep in a chair. The angle of his neck makes Derek wince in sympathy.

"Isaac,” Derek says.

Isaac snaps awake immediately.


“Where’s Stiles?”

“Stiles?” Isaac asks.

Jesus. It’s not like they know more than one.

an exaltation of harks *** by llassah | E | Alpha Wolf Derek. Omega Stiles.

All Derek wants is to get through the lambing season with his body and spirit intact. He had thought that the blizzards would be the main danger, not a highborn omega with beautiful eyes and a stubborn streak.

awful, wonderful you *** by stlinkskisparkles | M | Boarding School AU | Human Derek

Truth be told, Derek was suffering from the mild delusion he lived in all summer wherein he actually thought this year might be different, and he might, perhaps, be able to bury the hatchet with Stiles and start over.

The superglue that’s destroyed a ninety dollar pair of pants, however, says otherwise. Derek knows how this play goes down; eventually, he’s going to have to climb out of the pants and trudge back to his dorm half naked. Stiles will gloat for a damn week; Derek will have to put up with constant remarks about Stiles getting him out of his pants… Dammit, he’s actually going to get Derek out of his pants, and it’s not even close to the way he pictured it happening.

Balloon Animals Are Awesome *** by DiscontentedWriter | E |

Stiles is totally in love with Lydia. Until one day he’s not.
Fuck his life.
And seriously? Derek? Derek Hale?
He can’t be in love with Derek Hale. Derek hates him.
Doesn’t he?

Beauty and the Ex  *** by aggybird | M | Magic Stiles | College/University AU | AO3 account required to read

Stiles doesn’t want to screw up his chances with Josh, so he does something he may regret: he goes to Derek Hale, Josh’s intimidating ex-boyfriend, for dating advice.

Things don’t go according to plan. But with a little magic (and werewolves) they might go all right.

Bite Down Hard *** by KuriKuri | E | President’s Son Stiles. Bodyguard Derek. | Bonding AU

For a moment, Derek can’t breathe.

Because moles aren’t the only thing marring the pale skin of Stiles’ neck. Oh no, that’s –

– that’s a bond bite. A bond bite which Stiles definitely did not have yesterday, and which appears to have roughly the same dimensions as Derek’s own mouth.


(Or: In which Secret Service Agent Derek Hale accidentally gets bonded to First Son Stiles Stilinski. Oops.)

Burning Glances (Turning Heads) *** by Yiichi | NR | 18th Century AU | Cinderella AU | Tailor Stiles. Noble Derek.

Stiles is a lower-class tailor, who has always dreamed of attending the fabled, annual Hale ball. His good friend, Lord McCall, somehow managed to procure an extra invite.

Stiles doesn’t expect anything of the evening. He certainly doesn’t expect to capture the gaze of a dark, mysterious stranger wearing a wolf mask.

But Not With Haste by uraneia | E | X-Men AU | Mutant Stiles. Alpha Derek

It’s been years since Derek escaped from the hunters who killed his family and bound him in his human form. He travels solo, never staying in one place, keeping under the radar–until a skinny, smart-mouthed kid stows away in the back of his truck.

Four months ago Stiles’s first kiss put his best friend in a coma. His dad gave him a couple hundred bucks and a hug and told him to run. By the time Stiles witnesses the cage fighter known as Wolverine take out a shotgun and its wielder with his bare hands, he’s got a plan. He knows there’s a school in New York for kids like him. All he has to do is get there.

OR, in which Derek is the werewolf version of Wolverine and Stiles is Rogue and the plot of X-Men progresses accordingly, with a few notable deviations.

call it a wild card *** by stilinski | TauA | Baseball AU | Baseball Player Derek. Bodyguard Stiles.

“I am not playing the part of your fearless boyfriend, and you’re not playing prom queen. I am your bodyguard and this is what I do. You will trust me to get Erica out safely or I will strip you of any illusions you still have that I’m a skinny wretch and put you in the trunk, are we clear on that?”

“That’s unprofessional.”


Derek grunts. Stiles nods, satisfied.

Camaro ‘68 *** by ZainClaw | E | Hitchhiker Stiles. Runaway Derek.

Derek huffs, arching one eyebrow. “I’m not a fugitive.”

“You look like a fugitive,” Stiles insists, practically beaming. “Maybe you should start wearing cardigans.”

In which Stiles is a hitchhiker and Derek a runaway whose paths cross at a gas station in the California desert.

Chances Are… (Series) by relenafanel | GA +TauA | Series marked unfinished

“What kind of bet did you lose that you have to go out with this?” the guy asked, gesturing to himself.

“First person to flirt with me,” Derek grumbled.

Chocolates & Pomegranates *** by Dexterous_Sinistrous | TauA | Omega Derek. Alpha Stiles.

Derek has been an Omega for what feels like centuries. He is constantly hounded by Alphas and Betas who can’t control their hormones. He’s thankful for Laura defending his honor, but there is one person he’s always dreamed of giving himself to.

Too bad Derek is certain Stiles doesn’t know he exists.

Don’t Worry Baby by kalpurna | E | Hooker Stiles. Werewolf Derek

“You know you’re allowed to ask for vanilla sex, right?” he says, afterwards. “We can do whatever you want. That’s kind of the point.”

Derek doesn’t respond.

How to Win an Argument Without Really Trying by ssfan | E | 

It started with a kiss.

Well, actually, it started with an argument.

Like a Secret *** by rufflefeather | E | 

Stiles can’t get it up in the aftermath of the whole Nogistune trauma.

no aphrodisiac like loneliness *** by thepsychicclam | E | Future Fic

Stiles is 27 now, with a master’s degree and a career and a house and a serious boyfriend and a life in San Francisco that doesn’t include Derek. But then Stiles unexpectedly shows back up in Beacon Hills, and Derek would recognize that scent anywhere.

Rare Books and Special Collections *** by KuriKuri | E | Omega Writer Derek. Alpha Librarian Stiles.

Derek Hale hates libraries.

Unfortunately, not all books can be ordered on Amazon.

(Or: in which Derek is a grumpy omega writer, and Stiles is an annoyingly attractive alpha special collections librarian.)

There are roses on Derek’s doorstep. *** by @alocalband | NR | Valentine’s Day Fic

There are roses on Derek’s doorstep.

It doesn’t occur to him until nightfall, when the neighbors start discussing their romantic dinner plans at a decibel he has trouble tuning out, that he realizes the flowers might not have been delivered with malicious intent.

Because, apparently, today is Valentine’s Day. And apparently someone decided that Derek should receive flowers to celebrate the occasion.

With Warmest Regards (Affectionately Yours) *** by asocialfauxpas (fuzzytomato) | M | Royalty AU

House Hale and House Stilinski form an alliance through the betrothal of Prince Derek and Prince Stiles. Having only met once before, they write letters to get to know one another.

At the Crossroads *** by sir_not_appearing_in_this_archive | TauA | Teen Wolf-Supernatural Crossover | Side-Ship: Destiel

Stiles is possessed by a demon and the pack scrambles to find a way to get rid of it before it’s too late, and the Winchesters notice something odd happening in a town called Beacon Hills.

A Mating Moon by unpossible | E | Hooker Stiles | 

“Hey, Scott, so, I uh, there’s this amazingly hot guy and I’m uh, gonna spend the weekend with him but, you know, just to be careful, I’m sending you his picture, so if by some terrible chance my bloated corpse shows up sometime Monday, just, y’know pass this along to the authorities.” He pauses. “Uh. Kidding?” and then hangs up with a rush of air.

“That is the worst voicemail in the history of voicemails,” Derek says.

In This Twilight How Dare You Speak of Grace *** by secondstar | E | Apocalypse AU | BAMF Stiles. Alpha Derek.

Zombies. Stiles always knew the world would end this way.

The One Where They’re Forced To Marry In Ye Olden Times *** by Stoney | E | Arranged Marriage AU | 

Due to the destruction of House Hale and the debts incurred in their survival and search for justice, the King (blah blah, make believe world) arranges a marriage between Derek and Stiles, eliminating all debts the Hales may owe. Derek is very unhappy. Stiles is pretty shocked at who he’s being matched with, but he’s certainly not unhappy. It’s pretty clear from the start Derek doesn’t share that feeling.

Stiles passes the time by hunting with his falcon, Derek broods. Until…

The Socioeconomic Repercussions of Mutually Assured Destruction *** by alocalband | E | High School AU | 

“The trouble with having the kind of brain that likes to write essays on male circumcision for an Economics class, is that it also likes to turn PowerPoint presentations for Biology into odes on the perfection of notorious bad boy Derek Hale’s backside.”

To Be Worthy Of Hope by alocalband | TauA | Soulmate AU | 

“If you can’t say the words, you’re not mature enough to know what they mean,” Scott tells him.

Stiles throws a french fry at him.

(In which Derek is secretly pining, Stiles is oblivious to both Derek’s feelings as well as his own, and any personal growth that happens in the mean time is completely reluctant.)

36 Questions by Leslie_Knope | TauA | Future Fic

“So I’m doing my senior psych thesis on friendships,” Erica says, not-so-accidentally elbowing Derek in the ribs as she turns to face Stiles. “How they develop, how intimacy is fostered, stuff like that.”

“That’s cool,” Stiles says agreeably. “What’s our part?”

“Well, I can’t really tell you the point because that would influence the results. But it’s a set of 36 questions that you have to ask each other.”

“Just the two of us?” Derek chimes in, finally, and Stiles sighs.

“Okay, dude,” he says, making a face, “could you try not to look quite so offended? Like, my ego’s pretty strong, but come on, man.”

5 ways cosmo can help you win your man by stilinskisparkles | TauA | College/University AU

where derek never had to work to get a date, he always had someone pursue him or ask him out. but when derek sees stiles, he waits and thinks stiles will stroll up and ask him out. everyone of his past relationships started that way, until stiles doesn’t. and derek is left with the horrifying possibility that he will have to make the first move and dare he think of it, flirt? and attempt small talk. and it turns out, he’s really bad at it. maybe he even tries cosmo tips and calls his sisters, both of whom are like 100% trolling him

Ashes, Ashes by ShanaStoryteller | TauA | 

The Sheriff gets a call at work - someone’s tried to burn down his home with his son inside.

“I thought of you coming here, and finding me dead, of another burnt out husk of a body, something else fire has stolen from you, of you having nothing left to grasp but ashes,” John can’t even call that a whimper, it’s clearly a whine as Derek’s hands tighten against Stile’s hips, as if his boy will shudder to dust at the mere mention of the possibility unless Derek’s hands can hold him into one piece, “and that thought was worse than dying.”

Under Construction


You know I really hope that Sanvers is ‘that’ couple who stay together for every season of the show without unecessarily breaking up or having unecessary relationship drama (like Marshall & Lily/ Monica&Chandler). The couple who love each other so much, who are completely happy with each other and have such a healthy relationship and end up getting married by like season 5 of the show. I just hope that Sanvers can be this couple because there are very few wlw relationships that last long in tv/media because the writers either kill them off or break them up for no reason. The only wlw couples who had a happy ending that I can think of is Brittany/Santana & Laura/Carmilla; we need way more than that because it’s just unrealistic; there are wlw couples who arein long and happy realtionship you know. I just really want Alex and Maggie’s love to really blossom throughout who many seasons the show may have. I don’t trust the CW & I don’t know if I trust the Supergirl writers but I trust Chyler Leigh because she is so invested in this couple and wants to do it right. She has said that the relationship between Sanvers gets better and better and I believe her, she wouldn’t lie to us (she’s too good and pure). I just love Sanvers so much and we deserve a postive lgbt ship that represents the healthy committed lgbtq couples out there. P.S. lets stop the ship wars;who the f*ck cares who you ship whether it’s Sanvers, Supercorp, Karamel or Karolsen, hell ship all of them if you want. I actually like all of these ships (Yes even Karamel, they’re okay…for now). Just stop! We have bigger problems in the world like Donald f*cking Trump and his dangerous path to facism!

Originally posted by machinesvoice
The Witching Hour - MellytheHun [Sterek, T, 8k]
alternate universe - radio DJ, fluff, cute, h/c
By Organization for Transformative Works

Summary: The radio host AU no one ever asked for but I have written anyway because sometimes when DJ’s play several sad songs in a row, I worry about their mental health and then this AU was born.


This is glorious. Scott is working a night shift at Deaton’s, looking after the cats and dogs from 8pm to 4am, while the vet’s office is closed. Stiles is bored, and it’s summer, so he tags along, and from 3am they listen to Laura Hale’s radio show. Except one week, Laura takes some time off, and gets her brother to cover for her.

After he plays a few sad songs in a row, Stiles is worried about him so he calls the radio show, and he and Derek bond.

I didn’t recognise any of the music whatsoever, because I’m old and don’t even know what’s in the top 40, never mind what’s too cool to be in the top 40, but there are links throughout so if you like that sort of thing, you’ll be in heaven.

I was in heaven for the story. As much as I like stories that deal with Derek’s trauma, I love stories where Derek is pretty much a functioning person with baggage like everyone, and okay maybe it’s a bit worse than some people’s, but he’s okay with it and he’s moved on, happy and stable and doing okay.

And he falls for Stiles because he likes him and chooses to be with him, not because he needs to be “healed”, and Stiles falls for him because he’s a good guy and he’s funny and caring and considerate and snarky and sarcastic and interesting, not because he’s damaged and needs to be “saved” by the power of human love.

There’s absolutely a place for saving each other through the power of love, I don’t want to knock it. But I also love NOT saving each other through the power of love. Because that’s much closer to real life, where most people don’t have to deal with trauma after escalating trauma (thank god).

Anyway, I’m getting off topic. In short, I just loved this. It was well paced and beautifully characterised, and there was one bit where I got quite emotional over Derek’s show and another bit that just made my toes curl with happiness.

Absolutely lovely. Definitely one to read and re-read.

My Favorite Puppy- Derek Hale

Originally posted by berezneva-tw

Originally posted by learningfocus

Request// daddy derek getting mad at your BIG dogs for playing with/running over/ knocking over your little girl (3) and he puts them outside for the night (you have a fenced yard) but she comes down to him in the middle of the night crying because they’re not there to protect her

*First off, very cute (sorry I don’t know very much about dogs). Second of all, sorry for posting so late. I want to see Fantastic Beasts for the second time*

Laura had always been the princess of the family, being protected by Derek and her older brother, Kyle, since the moment she was brought home. The only issue was that she was constantly find trouble where it was unwanted and liked roughhousing. Getting two grey Great Danes didn’t help ‘keeping her safe constantly’ like her father thought it would.

“Edon! Lupe! Stop pushing Laura over,” Kyle shouted at the two dog and pushed them away from her, barely taking his eyes away from the Lego Movie playing on T.V..

“But it’s fun, Kyle” Laura defended her two dogs before picking up the tug toy once again and trying to get Edon to take the bait. Laura couldn’t contain her giggles as Edon relentlessly tried to pull the rope from her hands, dragging her across the wooden floor little by little in the process. It wasn’t until Laura slipped and fell backwards, letting go of the toy in the process, that the game stopped being fun. “Daddy!”

Derek walked from the kitchen cautiously, knowing that but trouble lied ahead. What he saw once entering the family room was nothing that surprised him: Laura pouting on the floor while the dogs licked at her face and Kyle lost in his movie. “What happened this time, Laura?”

“I was playing with the puppies. Edon pushed me down,” she answered while rubbing her elbow.

Derek let out a disappointed sigh while looking over at the two danes, quickly pulling them up by their collars. “Come on, guys. You can’t just keep tackling Laura. She’s got enough bumps and scrapes from messing around as it is.” Derek pushed the two dogs out the backdoor, planning to leave them there for the night. After Derek had gone back to the kitchen to help you unload groceries, Edon and Lupe had calmed their whimpering and settled in, knowing it was going to be a long night.

“Mommy,” a little voice whispered into your ear, disturbing your slumber. “Mommy!” At the whispered-shout, your eyes opened instantly to welcome the image of Laura, hair tangled and pajamas disheveled.

Keep reading

catmilla-hollstein  asked:

31. Hollstein

Sorry this took me so long, the fic took an unexpected turn into bittersweet territory and I wanted to get it right. Special shout out to @monicaoakwood for the help!

31. “Stop it, you’re embarrassing me.”

Carmilla fidgeted uncomfortably on the sofa. She felt odd sitting here alone, in the living room of Laura’s childhood home. At least meeting Laura’s father went well. Carmilla had been nervous all week in anticipation, knowing that Dan Hollis was quite intimidating and overprotective of his daughter, but the two hit it off immediately. He was so much like Laura, it was hilarious. She now knew exactly where Laura got her quirky personality and mannerisms.

Dan had called Laura into the kitchen to help with dinner a few minutes ago, and despite Carmilla’s offers to help out, Laura had insisted that her girlfriend wait in the living room and “make herself comfortable” because “she’s the guest.” So, Carmilla remained in the unfamiliar living room, waiting for her girlfriend to return.

Her eyes began to wander, taking in every detail. Evidence of Laura’s presence was strong here; it was easy to imagine a younger Laura running around the house in Batman pajamas or eagerly watching cartoons, sitting as close to the TV as possible. Those mental images brought a smile to her face.

Suddenly, a framed photograph on the other side of the room caught her attention. Carmilla stood and made her way over to the end table where it had been placed. Now that she was closer, she could see the image more clearly.

There were two people in the photo. Carmilla’s eyes were immediately drawn to the woman on the left side of the photo. Her light brown hair was being tousled by a gentle breeze, and she was staring at the camera with bright eyes and a warm smile. She was absolutely stunning.

Carmilla was truly intrigued, though, when she glanced over at the young girl in the photo. Her tiny arms were wrapped around the woman’s neck, and her face was stretched into an expression almost identical to the other woman’s. She was sporting a big, toothy grin, and the the sunlight hit her big brown eyes in such a way that they appeared to be glowing.

Carmilla would recognize those eyes anywhere.

She picked up the framed photograph, gently tracing her fingertips against the glass. So the older woman must be Laura’s mother.

“Hey, Carm, dinner’s ready! My dad told me to tell you that we…oh.” Laura lost her train of thought as she noticed what Carmilla was holding in one hand.

Carmilla had so many things she wanted to ask Laura about her mom. It wasn’t a subject Laura talked about often, and Carmilla never wanted to pry at something so personal, so she always gave Laura the space she needed. But now that she knew what the woman looked like, she was especially eager to learn more about her.

Despite her curiosity, Carmilla didn’t say a word. Instead, she and Laura both stared silently at the photo for a moment, then Laura reached over to hold Carmilla’s free hand and intertwined their fingers.

Finally, Carmilla broke the silence.

“She was beautiful.”

Laura nodded.

“And she looks just like you.”

“I wish you could have met her, Carm. She would have loved you,” Laura whispered back.

Carmilla was overwhelmed with emotion over the fact that Laura was finally opening up to her about her mother. She leaned over to place a kiss on her girlfriend’s cheek.

Just then, Dan walked into the room.

“I thought I told you girls to get ready for dinner! It’s getting cold,” he said. “Ah, I see you’ve found my favorite photo of Laura and her mom! I’ve got a whole album of Laura’s adorable baby pictures upstairs. How about I bring them down after dessert?”

“Dad,” Laura said, annoyed.

“I’ve got this adorable photo of baby Laura in the bathtub, and a picture from when she got her braces, and another one from that time she—”

“Stop it, you’re embarrassing me!” Laura whined.

Carmilla set the photo back down onto the table and followed Laura and her father into the kitchen. She couldn’t help but laugh as Dan continued to list as many embarrassing stories as he could while Laura tried with all her might to make him change the subject.

Later that night, after flipping through page after page of photos and listening to Dan further embarrass his daughter in front of her girlfriend, Carmilla found herself alone in the living room again. Laura had excused herself to take a shower while Dan returned to the kitchen to wash the dishes, once again refusing to let Carmilla help clean up. Naturally, she returned to the photo of Laura and her mother. There was just something about the image that was so enthralling to Carmilla.

She spent a few moments taking in every detail of the framed photograph, but looked up as she heard footsteps entering the living room. Dan Hollis stood in the doorstep, smiling.

“She really was a great mother,” he said. “Always so much put passion and love into everything she did. And now I see so much of her in my daughter. Sometimes it scares me how similar they look.”

“I know exactly what you mean,” Carmilla replied, smiling.

“I saw a change in Laura when we lost her mother. She doesn’t like to talk about it much, but the loss hit her really hard. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen her this happy, and I know it’s because of you.”

“It’s been a long time since I felt this happy too,” Carmilla admitted. “Thank you for inviting me to stay here. It’s been a pleasure meeting you.”

“She loves you so much, Carmilla. I can tell in the way she looks at you with so much adoration. It’s the same look her mother used to give me.”

That left Carmilla absolutely speechless. She was barely able to choke out a response before Dan wrapped her up in a huge bear hug. “I love her too, you know,” Carmilla whispered.

“Good,” Dan said as he released her from his grip. “Because you two were meant for each other, and I think my wife would agree. Good night, Carmilla.”

“Good night, Mr. Hollis.”

“Please, Call me Dan.”

“Good night, Dan.”

Carmilla rounded the corner and climbed the stairs to the second floor where Laura was waiting for her in in her room. For the first time in a long time, she truly felt like she was home.

Belong With Me

Hang in there, Brettonio fans! It’ll be okay. Just have faith and be patient. Anyway, here is a story, enjoy!


Sylvie desperately wanted to stay for Gabby and Matt’s reception, stay until the entire thing was over, but she couldn’t stand to be in Molly’s when Antonio was. It wasn’t that she was mad at him, she wasn’t. She was in over her head, this was her fault. However, every time she glanced over at him, she saw him staring at her also.

She couldn’t help but think of how happy they were before Laura ruined everything. Damn her. Why couldn’t Antonio see how much this was killing her?

Yeah, she needed to get out of here, get away from him. Maybe soon they could be in the same room together, but right now it was too soon.

She picked up her purse and she stormed out of Molly’s, her breath getting stuck in her throat as hot tears poured down her cheeks. This hurt too much. She leaned against the wall as she tried to control her breathing.

“Pull it together, Sylvie.” She harshly whispered, feeling stupid. She didn’t care about crying at her apartment, but not here. Just as she was trying to composed herself, she heard the door opened, she quickly wiped the tears.

She didn’t think she would get caught as she was on the side of Molly’s, but this person was walking that way. “Oh shit!” Matt jumped back, seeing Sylvie. “What are—” noticing the puffy of her eyes and the red on her nose, his face grew full of concerned. “Are you okay?” He questioned.

“Oh yeah.” She said, forcing a smile on her face. “Can you just tell Gabby I’ll see you later?”

“Sure.” He said, nodding his head. He watched as she turned to walked away and he grabbed her arm slightly. “Hey, for what’s it worth, you’ll be okay. You have a family behind you.”

“Thank you.” She took out her keys and headed towards her car. She appreciated Matt being sweet, but she was alone. Everyone loved Antonio and considered him to be family too, so they couldn’t very well be objective.

As soon as she made it to her apartment and walked inside, something felt different. Maybe it was her, but this didn’t feel like her home anymore. If she was being honest with herself, Chicago didn’t feel like her home anymore. She moved from Indiana to have a better happier life, and all Chicago gave her was pain. Pain that she never deserved.

She walked into her bedroom and she took off her jacket and boots as she laid in bed. For what felt like 2 hours, she let the tears out. She must have been in her own whole while crying because before she knew it, she heard Gabby’s voice. “Sylvie, we’re here.”

Sylvie looked up when Gabby said ‘we.’ She wasn’t sure why she thought she would bring Matt, but sometimes the girl didn’t think. But luckily it was Stella.

She wiped the tears away, shaking her head. “I’m fine, guys. Really.”

“Does she look fine to you, Gabby?” Stella questioned.

“No, not at all.” Gabby said as they walked over to Sylvie and wrapped her in a hug.

“Guys!” She exclaimed. “I can’t breathe.” She complained as they were wrapped in a hug like a sandwich.

“Our love is suffocating you, huh?” Stella said teasingly.

Sylvie laughed, shaking her head. “You’re so silly.”

Gabby looked at Sylvie with a sad look on her face. “Are you okay, sweetie?”

Sylvie sighed as she stood up from the bed and started pacing. “Not right now, I will be. I don’t know, maybe I should have told him that I didn’t want to take a break, that he was wrong. But was he?” She was rambling and she knew she was.

Stella stood up and grabbed her arm to stop her from pacing. “Only time can tell, sweetie. Maybe the break will be good for you guys.”

“We were just so good together.” She groaned.

“Oh yeah?” Stella questioned. “The sex, huh?”

Sylvie’s eyes widened and she smacked Stella on the arm. “No!” She laughed. “I just mean the relationship in general.”

“Okay, let’s talk about something else before Stella questions the sex though. Remember guys, this is my brother.” Gabby looked over at Sylvie. “So, why didn’t you tell me about this before you came home crying to yourself?” She questioned.

“Because this is your night, Gabby. With the crap you have been dealing with, you deserve a night of happiness. You don’t need my drama. Besides, this is your brother, you can’t be objective.” She pointed out.

“I won’t say ‘let’s make him pay’ or anything like that. Especially because he’s hurting also. But I will say this, a break is just that—a break. Me and Matt had our fair share of breaks, and look at us now.”

Although that should have made Sylvie happy, she wasn’t. Gabby and Matt had a good reason to take a break, her and Antonio did but also didn’t.

“Do you think he wanted the break to see if he still loves Laura?” She questioned. “Or if he wants to go back to her?” She added, sadly.

Gabby couldn’t help but laughed. “I know I said it might have been too soon, but at the same time, Antonio would never go back to Laura. Even if you and Antonio weren’t together for a few months, he still wouldn’t consider it. She made his life a living hell—she’s still making his life a living hell.”

“I know.” She sighed.

Stella and Gabby stayed for another hour, just trying to comfort Sylvie the best way they could.

She could barely sleep that night, she kept waking up from a deep sleep, crying. She dealt with heartbreaks her life thus far, but this one hurt her the most.

It was around 6 in the morning and she knew she wouldn’t make it to work. Then her thoughts went back to what she was thinking last night. Chicago may make everyone else happy, and at one point in time, it was what she needed. But what she really needed right now was to visit back home. She called Chief Boden and asked to use some of her personal days, he agreed, asking her if everything was okay. She lied and said yes and then hung up the phone.

As she was packing, she knew in her heart that she wasn’t returning to Chicago, she couldn’t. She wanted so badly to say goodbye to Gabby but she couldn’t. Gabby wouldn’t let her go.

Once she was done packing up her belongings, she looked around her apartment and she sighed. She promised herself the next place she made home, she wouldn’t leave over another man, but yet here she was, leaving because of Antonio Dawson. Antonio freakin’ Dawson.


Gabby was a little mad at Sylvie, as much as she knew she needed a break, she didn’t want a temporary partner, she wanted her partner.

As soon as her shift was over, she wanted to go home and sleep but first she wanted to check in on Sylvie. She had been calling her all shift and nothing yet, she was getting a little worried about her.

“Hey. I’ve been calling and texting Sylvie all day, but haven’t heard anything. I’m worried about her. Can you drop me off at her apartment?” Gabby asked Matt.

“You want me to come in with you?” He asked.

Gabby shook her head. “No, I think she just needs me.” She gave him a kiss as soon as he pulled up outside of Sylvie’s apartment. “I’ll see you soon.”

She stepped out of his truck and walked inside Sylvie’s apartment building. She wondered if she and Antonio made up yet, but figured if they did, she would have told her by now. She walked up to her door and she knocked gently. “Sylvie?” She called out. “Are you okay? For your sake, you better not be because I’m going to kick your ass for ditching me.”

When a few minutes went by and no answer, she started getting worried. She tried to open her door but it was locked. Where the hell was she? Then again it was pretty early. Duh, Sylvie was sleeping, that had to be it. But she couldn’t leave without checking on her.

She took out her keys and looked for Sylvie’s key. She hoped she was okay, but if she wasn’t, her brother was dead. So dead. She opened her door and she looked around. It was quiet, too quiet.

She walked around the apartment, calling out for Sylvie. “Sylvie?” Please, oh please, don’t let Antonio be in the bedroom with her. She would be happy they were back together, but it was a sight she was sure she would never recover from.

She pushed her bedroom door open further, expecting to see Sylvie laying in her bed. When she saw that her bed was still made and not slept in, she started to panic. Where was she? Sylvie wasn’t the type to stay out all night, she never could when they were hanging out, so it was doubtful she was out all night now.

Her thoughts went to Antonio, maybe she was there. She was tempted to call him but she was stopped in her tracks when her eyes moved over to her closet. She walked over to her closet, opening the door wider, noticing that all of her clothes were gone. No, this can’t be right. Sylvie wouldn’t leave without saying anything to her. She walked over to her drawers and opened them, noticing they too, were empty.

She took out her cell phone and dialed Antonio’s number. “Hey Sis.” He said on the three ring, his voice sleepily. “What’s wrong?”

“By any chance is Sylvie with you?” She asked.

At the mention of her name, Antonio was awake. He sat up in his bed. “No, we broke up.” He said, his mind filled with the memories of their awful break up. It wasn’t awful because of the stuff they said, but mainly because of how badly he felt afterwards. He was so badly hurt, but this was for the best. They both knew this.

“I know.” Gabby said in an annoyed tone. “She didn’t come to work yesterday, I have been calling and texting her for 24 hours. I’m at her apartment now, and she’s gone, Antonio. She’s gone. She packed up her things and left.”

“Shit.” He groaned as he ran his free hand in his hair. “I’ll be right there, sis. Don’t leave.” He said as he hung up the phone and quickly got dressed. This was why he never wanted to get involved with one of Gabby’s friends, but honestly this time that thought never crossed his mind. Everything was such a mess right now.

He made it to Sylvie’s apartment in remarkable timing, but it helped that he could still use his sirens, he really needed to stop doing that. But worry filled him. Where would Sylvie go? He never thought she would feel the need to leave Chicago, she loved it here. She loved it here before him, anyway.

He stepped out of his truck in a hurry and ran into Sylvie’s building. Although they spent more time at his place, sometimes they would spend it here, so he was familiarize with her apartment. He walked up to her door and opened it, seeing Gabby sitting on the couch, visibility upset.

“Hey sis. So, tell me all you know.”

“I don’t know anything, Antonio. This isn’t like Sylvie. I mean, I know she was upset, but she’s like you—she would never miss a day of work unless it was very important.”

A few seconds later, Gabby’s phone vibrated and she thought it was Matt, asking if everything was okay, but it was a text from Sylvie.

Hey, I’m sorry that I didn’t do this face to face, but I know you, you wouldn’t have let me leave. I went back to Indiana, and I’m not sure if I’m ever coming back to Chicago. Please don’t say anything to Antonio, not right now. I love you and thank you for everything, truly. You were like the sister I never had, and I’ll always be grateful for our time together. Please take care. I love you.

Gabby was so upset, she wanted to yell and hit her brother, but she knew he was hurting just as bad as Sylvie. And as much as she wanted to honor her friend’s wises, he had the right to know where she was.

“She left.” Gabby said.

“Left? Where did she go?” He questioned. “Gabby, where did she go?”

“Home.” She said.

“Home? Her home is in Chicago. But then he realized what she meant by that. “Well, then I need to go to Indiana and bring her back where she belongs.”

“No!” Gabby exclaimed. “She didn’t want me to tell you. If you go there, she’ll know I told you.”

“I understand that, Gabby. And I’m sorry to put in that position, but she belongs here!” He said, raising his voice, not because he was mad at Gabby, but because he was mad at himself.

“You broke up with her!” Gabby said, raising her voice also, to get him to understand that he can’t go there and forced her to come back to a city that brought her so much pain, and right now he was the sole reason of her pain. “You going there won’t do her any good. She left because of you! Because being here was too painful, because everywhere she turned, she saw you.”

This hurt Gabby way more than she thought it would. When Sylvie first came to town, she just lost Shay and never thought she would love having another partner, but she quickly warmed up to Sylvie. That was just the type of effect Sylvie had on people, and now she was going to get another partner that she hated. She was the only reason she was excited about working on ambo again, being able to work with Sylvie was always fun, but now she was gone.

“Fine.” Antonio said, giving up on the idea of going after Sylvie. “You need me to drive you home?” He questioned, wanting to get out of that apartment. It reminded him of Sylvie, of the one that he let get away. It was crazy because he was sure that a break was what he wanted—but now, he wasn’t so sure. He missed her like crazy already.

“Yeah, sure.” She noticed the sadness in his eyes, but figured it would be best not to talk about it right now. “If you want, I’m making a good dinner tonight, so stop by and hang with me and Matt.”

Antonio tried to smiled at her suggestion but he couldn’t. “I’ll try.”

“I guess that’s as best of an answer I’m going to get, right?” She questioned as she slipped on her coat and picked up her purse. The firehouse was surely going to be bummed out once they found out Sylvie was gone. Whenever they lost a family member, whether it was by death or them moving away, it always hurt them and the firehouse would never be the same without Sylvie.


It has been close to a month since Sylvie moved to Indiana and at first it was hard adjusting back here. Mainly because she missed Antonio so badly. But now, the pain was almost gone and she was starting to smile again.

She started hanging out with her old friends again, although most of them were now married and had children, but that didn’t bummed her out as much as she thought it would.

Tonight, she was going out with one of her friends and she was so excited. It was the first time she’s been out since coming here. Sure, she grabbed lunch a few times with her friends but that was it. And when she did see her friends, it wasn’t for long and they were just at their house.

As much as she wanted to wear a dress, it was too soon. Every dress she had reminded her of Antonio. She sighed, wondering when she would stop thinking of him. For gods sake, they didn’t even confessed their love for another, they weren’t that serious. Although she would be lying if she said the last time she hugged him, she couldn’t feel the love they shared. “Get it together, Sylvie. It’s over.” She muttered to herself as she looked through her closet on what to wear.

She ended up deciding on jeans with a white dressy shirt that showed off enough cleavage. Not where she looked like a slut, but enough to get free drinks. Tonight, she wanted to have fun and forget about why she moved back home in the first place.

A few hours later, she was sitting in a booth at a club when her friend had to bring up Antonio. “ So, come on, we know the reason why you’re here. But at least say the guy was hot.”

Sylvie laughed, shaking her head. “What? Why does that matter?” She questioned.

“She won’t answer the question, so he must have been. Sweetie, you left Indiana because of Harrison and sorry to say, the guy wasn’t all that. If you’re going to leave a city over a man, he should be smoking hot.” Sylvie sighed at her friend’s logic. But she had a point. In some sense anyway.

“I left Indiana because I wanted a change. Coming back here doesn’t necessarily say I want a change. I just missed my old life. Chicago was great, but it was too much pain there. I’m happy here now.” Which was the half-truth. She was happy to be close to her family again, but she missed her firehouse family badly. Gabby and Stella kept trying to call her, but it was too soon.

“Can you just answer the question so we can get our groove on?” Her other friend questioned and she laughed. “Because you know she’s going to keep going until you answered it.”

“Fine, yes, he was hot.” Sylvie sighed, this wasn’t helping.

“How hot?” Her friend leaned forward. “Last question, I swear.”

“Well–” Sylvie looked around the club and turned her attention back to her friends. “You see every guy here? They are a 3 maybe 4, compared to him.”

“Picture please!” Her friend exclaimed.

“Nope. I deleted all the photos I had of him.” Which was a lie. Sylvie didn’t have the strength right now to do that. It was the only thing that kept her smiling most of the time, knowing that they did have some pretty wonderful times together. “Now, let’s dance!” Sylvie said as she got up from the table and walked on the dance floor.

Sylvie was dancing to the beat of the music, finally feeling free of the pain and everything. She was minding her business when she heard someone’s familiar voice. “Sylvie Brett. I heard you were back, but it’s great to see you.”

Sylvie turned her head and she sighed. “Harrison.” She whispered.

“What are you doing back?” He questioned, surprised she came back years later. “I should have figured eventually you would come back.”

“The same old Harrison.” And although that should have pissed her off, right now that comforted her.

“Can I buy you a drink?” He questioned.

“Sure.” She smiled, figuring this couldn’t hurt.

Sylvie couldn’t remember where her friends went, but knew they wouldn’t leave her alone.

“This is nice.” Harrison commented. “Feels like old times.”

“It does.” She agreed, nodding her head. “I forgot how easy it was talking to you.” She admitted.

“Do you want to dance?” He questioned and she nodded her head.

They both stood up from their seats and headed on the dance floor. Of course as soon as they headed on the dance floor, a slow song came on.

“We can wait for the next song.” He offered.

“No, it’s fine. As long as you don’t grab my ass.” She said, laughing.

“I promise I won’t.”

They weren’t dancing long before she felt Harrison being literally ripped from her. “What the hell?” She gasped.

It didn’t take long for her to realize it was Antonio and he was beating the crap out of Harrison.

“Antonio, stop!” She screamed as she ran over to the fight and grabbed Antonio by the shoulders. “Stop! Will you stop!”

She wasn’t sure why he was so mad, they were broken up. He wanted this, so why the hell was he here? And how in the world did he find her?

Hearing her voice must have calmed him down, because he stopped punching Harrison and he stood up. He looked over at Sylvie. “What the hell are you doing here?” He looked over at Harrison. “With him?” He spat out in disgust.

“It’s not like this is a date—wait a minute.” She wasn’t sure why she was explaining herself to him. “It’s none of your business!”

This was not the way this night was supposed to go, not at all. She finally found her friends and they were walking close to her, but they kept their distance. She heard her friend whispered though, “He is hot! Good for Sylvie.”

She ignored her friend’s words and walked over to Antonio. “Leave now!” She ordered as she crossed her arms across her chest. “I have nothing to say to you.”

“The hell you don’t.” He said, he was so angry. “You’re coming back to Chicago, to your real life.”

“This is my real life.” Sylvie would be lying if she said an angry Antonio wasn’t hot. But he couldn’t come to her city, telling her what to do.

Antonio looked around at the people staring at him. “Can we talk somewhere else?” He questioned.

“No.” She said sternly. “Go.”

“Sylvie.” He warned. He wasn’t in the mood for this. Especially not after seeing her slow dance with her ex fiance.

“Fine. You have 5 minutes.” She said as she looked at her friends who smirked at her. She could tell in their eyes they were saying they would see her in 2 hours. But Sylvie was serious, Antonio wasn’t in control anymore.

“Let’s talk in the car.” He suggested as they walked out of the club in silence.

Once they were both settled in the car and Antonio turned on the heat, she sighed. “What’s the matter with you Antonio?” She started right in on him. “You can’t go around beating up guys that are talking or dancing with me. We’re broken up.” She reminded him.

“Technically yes we are, but honestly, we’re just on a break, on a pause. So, I don’t want you dancing with anyone, especially not your ex fiance.” He said, his jaw clenching.

“You can’t expect me to wait around until you’re ready for a relationship.” She pointed out. “Besides, that was an innocent dance. You took it too far.”

“It may have been an innocent dance to you, but was it for him?” He questioned.

“That’s not the point. This makes me realize moving away was the best decision for us.”

“Oh, is it?” He questioned in an angry tone. “It seem like more of a coward move than anything.”

“Are you kidding me?” Now she was getting angry. “You have no idea what happened at Molly’s the night we broke up. I couldn’t even stay and support my friend. Your sister. Don’t sit there and say that was a coward move when all Chicago ever did was caused me pain!”

“Sylvie, your home is Chicago. There isn’t anything here for you. Please just come back. Gabby misses you, the firehouse misses you, I miss you.”

“Even if I say yes and come back, we’re still broken up.” She pointed out. “Unless your job settled down and Laura stopped being crazy, nothing changed.”

“Maybe I was wrong.”

Her heart dropped in her stomach because she thought he meant he was wrong to say he missed her. She stayed silent because she felt like if she said something, she would burst into tears.

“My life is never going to settle down. But that’s life. Maybe there isn’t a perfect timing to start a relationship. Maybe it’s just when someone finds a person that is perfect for them and is willing to put up with their crap.” He admitted. “Although, you didn’t want to put up with Laura.”

“It wasn’t that, Antonio. I just didn’t want to get dragged in with your problems with her.” She sighed, knowing how badly that sounded. “It’s one thing when I’m off and she wants to mess with me, fine. But I just don’t like my problems following me at work.”

“I know, and for that, I’m truly sorry.”

“I guess what really made me pissed and hurt even, is when she implied that I only learned to play chess for Diego for you. I really enjoyed that bonding time with Diego and I was very excited playing chess with him that day.” She admitted. “I know that sounds silly–”

Antonio interrupted her. “No, that doesn’t sound silly. I’m happy you found a way to bond with Diego. And Laura shouldn’t try to take that away—no one should.”

Sylvie took a deep breath and she nodded her head. “I’m just not sure if I can handle getting hurt that badly again.” She confessed.

“I know I couldn’t.” He agreed with her. “But I don’t know about you, but I was very happy with you. More happy than I have been in a long time. And this past month, I’ve been miserable.”

“I have too.” She reached over and she took his hand. “With being so many miles from you, you would think I wouldn’t be miserable but I am.”

“I know we can’t rush with this—and it’s okay if you’re not ready—but do you think I can have my girl back?” He questioned.

Sylvie was terrified of getting hurt again, but she was more terrified of letting Antonio go back to Chicago without her, and him moving on to someone else. Or worst, regretting all this.

“Of course. I’m yours, forever.” She said as she leaned forward and gave him a kiss.

She pulled away after a few seconds when she realized something.

“Why did you pull away for?” He groaned.

“I just thought of something.” Her face broke out in a smile. “You were jealous.”

“I was not!” He said, defensively.

“So, you just go around beating up guys?” She questioned.

“If they’re touching you, damn right!” He gave her a smile. “But that isn’t jealously.”

“Oh yeah?” She questioned. “Then what is that called?”

“Putting him back in his lane.” He said, smiling at her. “Fine, maybe I was jealous. You’re telling me you wouldn’t have been jealous if you saw me slow dancing with a woman. Her hands all over me?” He questioned.

“Okay okay, stop. I don’t need to see an image.” She said with a smile. “But yes, you’re right. I would have been jealous. You’re mine. No one else is allowed to put their hands on you.”

“They won’t.” He promised as he lifted their joining hands and he kissed the palm of her hand. “Let’s go get your stuff from your parents house and head home?” He suggested.

“I mean, it’s late, so why don’t we go to a hotel and show each other how much we missed each other?” Now that she wasn’t mad anymore, she kept remembering his angry hot face, and not only an angry face, but he was also jealous so that made him that much sexier.

“You got yourself a plan.” He winked at her as he started the car. “Just point me to the nearest, cleanest hotel.” He smiled as he kept his grip on her hand as she used her free hand to text her friends.

“I have to let my friends know that I’m not going back in.” Her thoughts went to Gabby. “How is Gabby? She probably hates me.” She said, sadly.

“No, she doesn’t.” He reassured her. “She was just hurt, but she’s fine.”

“Hopefully I can get my job back. Do you know if they hired anyone yet?” She questioned.

“No, they didn’t. Gabby asked Boden not to hire anyone yet, she had hope that you would return home.”

“I’m glad she did.” She smiled as she put her phone away. “And I’m glad you came to dragged me back home.”

“You belonged in Chicago.” He smiled at her. “And with me.”

anonymous asked:

are you writing for the sterek valentines meme? if yes please ♥ write me

“So,” Stiles zips up his bag and turns to give Derek a bracing smile, “You gonna miss me?”

Derek snorts from where he’s standing opposite Stiles, “You wish.”

“Hell yeah, I do! I earned you pining after my awesome friendship, dude. Remember our first year? You wouldn’t make eye contact with anyone, and now,” Stiles waves his hands around their small dorm room, “You got a whole host of pals.”

“I wouldn’t exactly call Boyd and Erica a host.”

“Small in numbers, but big on the heart,” Stiles pats his own, wiggles his eyebrows. “Did you ever think we’d get so deep at space camp?”

“Sure,” Derek smirks at him, picks up his own bag slowly, “All those nights you talked my ear off about how this year’s gonna be your year with that Lydia Martin; so deep.”

“Shut up! It is gonna be my year, dude. I’m sixteen, now. I’m practically a man.”

There’s a beat, and Derek’s small smile breaks into a grin, “Practically.”

Keep reading

You know what I think?

Robert would never have supported this child and agreed to be part of his/her life is Aaron wasn’t supportive, Aaron is just too important to him. So in order for Robert to come to terms with being a father, and actually look forward to it, Aaron has to be supportive. 

All this, so they can rip it from Robert, finally when he’s in a good place.

Gotta love, Emmerdale plots.  

Thoughts on American Gods 01x04...

a) actually really like the portrayal of Laura and her relationship with Shadow. Like it works in character and the suffocation of their lives, why Shadow loves her and why it doesn’t quite work, why he’d want the comfort they’ve built and she would find it stifling. I didn’t necessarily like Laura as a person, but I could understand her, which was more than in the book (where she didn’t have much of anything). And it gave a much better picture of Shadow’s life/character before prison too, the lack of which always bothered me.

b) how dare you talk to Mr Jacquel like that?!

c) Audrey is my new fave.

d) I gotta know - did she request that the funeral director insert her deceased husband’s severed dick up his own ass or somehow sneak in to take care of that covertly? Either way I love her and the fact she clearly knows the correct stitch for human skin.


stillwishingonstardusst  asked:

Bruh, I followed bc quality blog, but like , dude pleaseeeee tell another drunk story. That's what I'm really here for.


ALRIGHT I mentioned this story once already but it’s a great fucking story get ready hold on to your nips this shit’ll twist them right the fuck off it’s insane.

Alright so we’re throwing this riot let’s be honest it was like so far past a party it was a whole different level we were fighting with fire like literally vinyl gloves with cotton hand wraps soaked in lighter fluid and then we light them on fire and punch each other it was FUCKING RAD I wanted to put in a fucking eagle making sweet love to a gutiar here but I can’t find it and I’m too drunk for photoshop.

So yeah we’re drunk and we’re fighting with fire also we have road flares because I dont fucking know we just did.

Guys we should have died like no joke I should not be telling you these stories I should be buirried.

So we’re drunk and rioting and making terrible decisions except for Kyle. Kyle is being a suave motherfucker he’s talking to this girl her name is Laura anyways Kyle and Laura are hitting it off it is very going clearly going to result in sexy times the only problem is that before Laura showed up Kyle agreed to firefight me and gues swhat motherfuckers IF YOU PROMISE ME A DRUNKEN FIGHT THERE BETTER BE A DRUNKEN FIGHT OR THERE WILL BE HELL TO PAY

So Kyle tells Eric “hey I’ve got this thing I need to eat it’s super important can you take my fight” like that’s literally what he said so Eric is just like “sure dude yeah I can do that” the problem being that I already fought Eric that day and Kyle and I had some recent roommate issues taht we had to deal with and guys cards on the table I just really wanted to punch Kyle in the throat with my burning fist.

So there are some issues that I need to take care of because of the combination of overly subtle double entendre and me being too drunk and focused on punching things to notice Kyle trying to get his game on so I do what was really the only reasonable thing to do I take out my drunken rage and disappointment on Eric.


So the real problem here is Laura only partially understands how fucking insane we were. She was NOT prepared for a screaming young man covered in neon paint (did I mention we painted ourselves?) lobing a flare into the room and trying to punch her partner in the face while she lay naked in his bed. To be fair, I don’t think anyone would have been prepared for that.

To be more fair I don’t think anyone was ready for Kyle’s response which was to launch out of the bed whip off the condom mid air and slap me across the face with it.


Nothing stops a fight quite like getting slapped with a condom. Like for most people there probably is like a disgust part to it like “ew that was on a dick or in a vagina/butthole and now it’s touching my face” but really for me it was more the disappointment in myself for interrupting someone having fun.

Like guys if I ever interrupt someone having sex it will literally ruin my night that’s not cool guys party foul bro party foul.

Anyways there’s some loud apologizing and I throw the flare back into the halla nd also threaten to punch anyone hwo follows me into the room and I leave and I fight Eric but like my heart isn’t really in it you know like I’m punching him but I just don’t feel anything and Kyle and Laura have a great time and they hook up a bunch of times after so YAY HAPPY ENDING!

Also, we did eventually have that fight, and I may and or may not have punched Kyle in the throat and made him throw up. Fun fact: if you drink enough your vomit is flammable.