laura gets personal

The fact that my mom walked in on me, a 21-year-old woman, taking this picture of my tiny sons

she just stood there with this completely creeped out look for like a minute

silently waiting for an explanation that refuted what here eyes were seeing

honestly words failed me


in the last year i have unofficially changed my name, failed at getting important grades, gone through the darkest times i’ve ever faced, have had to decide whether to go hard or go home at college, said goodbye to someone that once meant so much to me, made new friendships that are so so incredible and here i am now. to sum it up, all that shit was ultra fucking terrifying at the time, and even in retrospect, i am still confused how the fuck i got through it but i got through it. i mean the last year has been a mix of scary, sad, determination, happiness, amazing, incredible, impressive and just overall not what i expected at all. but here i am, still strolling through the woods and slowly making it outta here with the help of some fantastic people and professionals.

i guess what i’m trying to say is that in the past year, i’ve gotten to a place i didn’t ever think i’d reach, not ever. i’ve found friends i wouldn’t have ever thought i’d be lucky enough to talk to, let alone talk to daily and see. i’ve been accepted in ways i thought only existed in the ‘it gets better’ section of the world. it’s been an terrifyingly incredible stroll, and who knows how it’ll continue, but here i am now, being someone i didn’t ever think i’d be able to be. i am noah sydney cato carter, and i am becoming the person i could only ever dream of being.


Inside Reign: Syd & Pinoe

-So you guys do seem like you get along pretty well.
-Not really.

Sometimes I think about how Carmilla is going to outlive Laura and I die inside

Okay quick thing: Y’all know “melk” and “pellow” is an Elise thing and not a Laura thing right?

Borne to Chant 
because you can’t have enough death jokes with this game.

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Just came back from my Irish Studies class, this week we read Carmilla and on my way out I mentioned the Web Series to my professor and he seemed really interested in it and said that he’d check it out and then mention it next class and on the one hand I’m just like oh my God we’re probably gonna be talking about the web series next week this is awesome, and on the other I’m just thinking oh God oh God please do not find my tumblr thank you

Also still in happy disbelief that I get to write an essay for school on Carmilla :D

carmilla is such a self aware character i love her

The Trades We Choose: Stranded

/8 to

The Trades We Choose. Personal Assistant AU.
Pairing: Hollstein
Rating: Explicit (for language and eventual sexual content)
Word Count:5305
Summary: In November, Carmilla Karnstein turns 25. In November, she becomes the new chairman of Karnstein Industries. In November, Laura will part ways with her.
After November, she’d never see Carmilla Karnstein again.

Subscribe on AO3 or Track the tag Carmilla PA AU for updates that are scheduled for Sunday afternoons

Also I suppose I owe a thank you to holystein​ for editing this for me, even though she made me let her read it early technically then she laughed at all my typos.

“We’re imperfect people trappedin an imperfect world until we get to that place beyond.” –Kathie Lee Gifford

After that night, Carmilla is really nice to you.Like, really nice to you. It’s refreshing getting a smile instead of ablank stare. It’s nice to have her ask you for things rather than demand themin that guarded voice. And you love it. The two of you get plenty of strangelooks due to Carmilla’s change in attitude. But you ignore them becauseCarmilla really is a lovely person when she isn’t glaring.

After meeting her, you realize Danny is around the office a lot more than you’d known. Maybe you’re just blind to everyone else because of how invested you are in breaking through Carmilla’s walls. But you now often find Danny wandering around the Karnstein Industries building on her phone. You wave when you make eye contact with her and she’d give you a small wave back.

It felt nice knowing someone aside from Kirsch, Carmilla, and the various random people you eat with at lunch. She offers to eat with you a week after the gala and slowly it becomes a regular thing for Danny to meet you during your lunch break. Occasionally, Kirsch joined the two of you and that’s how you find out that she and Kirsch have a small rivalry.

They banter back and forth about things you don’t really pay attention to. You think it’s mostly flirting, though you’re sure they’d deny it heavily if you mentioned it to them. And you don’t want to make them uncomfortable, so you don’t mention it. However, they have no such qualms about teasing you about your relationship with Carmilla.

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I had to cancel my copy of DAI cos I ordered it for the wrong platform

And NOW I don’t know if I can afford it. 

My birthday is ten days after it, but can I really wait that long?

My parents reluctantly said they’d get it, but I’d have to wait till my birthday. 

I asked my friends if I could get it as a group thing, but I have had basically no response so I don’t know.

Pretty pissed off right now. This game was distracting me from my money problems and now it has become PART of my money problems. 

Yes I know there’s more important things first world problems its only a week blah blah blah, but I’ve had a lot of shittiness happening to me over this past month. My gran died, college is piling on top of me, everything is falling apart.

I guess I just need a break.