laugh my arse off

So, my dad watched TST

My dad is a casual. He lets me talk about TJLC because he is curious and he likes hearing about what I like (bless him). We went to Berlin together and he said “I’m bored, it’s 7am, tell me about Johnlock.” And for 2 hours I spoke. He doesn’t think Johnlock is happening and he actually doesn’t give a shit. Though he says it might be a possibility.


He said it was illogical of John, of his character to cheat on Mary. He added “the texts he sent… We aren’t told they’re addressed to the weird woman. By the way, let’s talk about her. What is wrong with her? Her lips had such a shade of red! Maybe it’s a reminder of the abominable bride.”


Then he started talking about Mary’s death. Because my dad was laughing his arse off while watching the scene. Not because of John’s Chewbacca noises. When Mary jumped in front of Sherlock, he began chuckling. At the end of the episode, he said “It’s ridiculous. She couldn’t have jumped like that, she didn’t have the time. She must have known or something. And what the hell was that little speech? Obviously she had the perfect amount of time to say it before dying. That was so dramatic. It can’t be real.”


I asked him what he thought of John’s reaction. To quote him: “John wasn’t that sad, he was just bloody angry. Even when his wife dies it’s about Sherlock. Like, we didn’t see him being sad. We saw him mad at Sherlock, we saw Molly giving Sherlock the letter, we saw the therapist. We barely saw the grave! I don’t even think we’ve seen it.”


I eventually asked him about the “go to hell”. He replied, “Well, I think it might be a little joke. You know how to say you hate someone to in fact say you love them? She obviously hates him. She’s just like “do that but don’t forget how much I hate you”. So yeah, I think Sherlock’s going to take it friendly as I said before when she’s in fact just expressing how much she dislikes him since the very beginning. The thing is: even if Sherlock gets the fact she actually hates him, he is going to do what she wants/wanted because it’s about John. And when it’s about John, it’s about Sherlock’s heart.”

I’m sitting at a train station in the middle of London freezing my arse off and laughing and kind of shaking, I’m so tired and angry and sad but also there are theories out there and I keep reading them and wondering and it makes me wonder at myself and it is the day after 22.1 and I honestly think this is the most wild and out of control time of my life, tumblr is wild, this show has fucked me up and keeps on fucking, where is the tin hat, it is in shreds on the floor and also on my head but I am no warmer and I have no idea what is real real is sherlock real I do not know

Why am I having so many feels about Dan and Luci?  I’m caught between laughing my arse off, then holding back the sniffles.  These two see things in each other that they desire (lbr, admire) and are learning to open up and share with each other despite their extreme differences - backhanded compliments, outright insults, and hilarious improve aside, lol. 

Can’t believe that the actor that played Troy Barnes in Community, Donald Glover, is also Childish Gambino… I once had a mate who said her favourite artist was Childish Gambino and obsessed over him regularly. I remember Googling the name and seeing pictures and reading about him and thinking nothing of it. Then, after watching Community and Googling the actor, I see that it’s him that is Childish Gambino and my mind is blown. Probably a very small thing to be a “mind blown” moment but it’s these things in life that shock me lots but are also just so satisfying.

It’s similar to how whilst I was watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine I spent the 3 seasons trying to remember where I know the actor who plays Peralta (Andy Samberg) from, and my little brother later told me that he’s part of the comedy group The Lonely Island! Haha, I remember watching their music video to “Jizz in my pants” years ago, laughing my arse off. It was strangely satisfying to watch it again recently after seeing Brooklyn Nine-Nine, because it literally felt like Peralta was in that music video.

I really don’t know why or how I’m pleased by the simple things in life like this but I love it. It makes me a lot happier than massive conventional things like receiving a really cool birthday gift or being told that you mean a lot to someone. Strange but meh, I guess that’s me.

altene  asked:

I just discovered your blog and I fucking love it what the actual fuck what is this sorcery like I'm supposed to study and shit right now but nope I'm just scrolling trough your blog laughing my fucking arse off and you are bae this blog is bae your posts are bae the 2ps are bae and I just can't handle all this.What is this living hell I'm supposed to be a functional member of society,but I'm here laughing like a retarded whale all along. (Sorry for the bad english,I'm from Italy 😅)

omf ti amo anch’io!!!! study my child you must do a grade to throw some shade ya know what i’m sayin ;))) I don’t pease tell me :,)) your English is great, though retarded isn’t a word you should use leisurely mio amic@,,,, it’s quite offensive to a lot of people!! ((including me, my brother is constantly made fun of because he has a high level of autism and was bullied out of having friends))

grazie mille, i’m glad you like my blog pal!! mi dispiace, i’m trying too hard, I tried to learn Italian and i’m cringing at myself :,))) va bene, your English is perfetto *okay emoji*

i’ll,,,, show myself out,,,,, ci ao

I’m laughing my arse off thinking of the poor casual viewers right now

It’s like catching a movie 1 hour after it has started

  • Wait why is there a ‘previously on’, i thought this was a one-off?
  • What’s the point of repeating their meeting again? i thought we were getting an actual new story?
  • but john is married to mary? but they don’t live together?
  • but molly can’t be a man?? i am feel so uncomfortable i can’t sexualize her??
  • but why is sherlock calling the bride a ‘he’? this show is so poorly written?
  • but what’s the point of showing mycroft eating and betting on how much time he’s got left?? i don’t get why he has to be fat anyway?? is this supposed to be funny?
  • i don’t understand the orange pips reference?
  • what even is this awkward conversation between holmes and watson?? i thought they were dude-bro-pals? this is such an unusual conversation topic for bros? this is not how me and my bros talk about titties?
  • but moriarty’s brains are half-blown so he can’t be there?
  • why is everyone talking about a fucking elephant falling from the table
  • wHOA THAT WAS SOME INCEPTION SHIT WHAT’S GOING ON
  • but now we’re back?? this show is so confusing?
  • and back to present again??
  • but why did it have to be women?? that is just so improbable?? women having spunk? inconceivable
  • sERIOUSLY DUDE STOP SWTICHING BETWEEN ALTERNATE TIMELINES I CAN’T FOLLOW THIS NONSENSE THIS SHOW IS JUST SO BAD
  • bUT HOW IS THE SKELETON MOVING, I THOUGHT THIS WASN’T A SCI-FI SHOW
  • WHAT THE FUCK IS EVEN GOING ON WHY ARE THEY AT A WATERFALL
  • THAT’S SO INAPPROPRIATE, SUGGESTING THAT THEY ELOPE. LISTEN THEY ARE VERY HETEROSEXUAL BROPALS AND ANYTHING OTHER THAN THAT IS DISGUSTING

*mofftiss’ maniacal laughter from the distance*


I honestly feel SO SORRY FOR CASUAL VIEWERS RIGHT NOW.

Because this can all be summed up in one gif:

MOFTISS MIGHT HAVE HIJACKED CHRISTMAS, BUT WE JOHNLOCKERS HAVE HIJACKED THE SHOW AND NOW HAVE THE POWER.

KNEEL BEFORE US OR DIE.