latula mituna

9

what i know about homeshit part 2

part 1 

so many fuckin characters tumblr couldn’t fit it all in one post

the signs as alternate selves
  • Aries: unfortunate slave to an evil overlord, occasionally forgets how to breathe
  • Taurus: gets wings somehow, everyone thinks it's pretty rad
  • Gemini: the world's most powerful and longlived psychic
  • Cancer: leads a rebellion against Betty Crocker, then dies
  • Leo: finds true love and confuses archaeologists everywhere with confusing cave art
  • Virgo: majors in how to raise children while on the run from imperial forces, dies tragically
  • Libra: underestimates their rival and gets hanged in the most anime shit ever, also has a dragon
  • Scorpio: hates dragons, hangs people, sails the high seas, inspires ruthless young pirates for decades to come
  • Sagittarius: cries because of this one time he almost killed his best friend, hides in a cave for the rest of his life
  • Capricorn: joins a cult, also they're really tall. like, just, really fucking tall, it's 90% of their personality
  • Aquarius: sad man cries because no one wants to kiss him. doesn't realise it's because he's a desperate and unpleasant person
  • Pisces: Betty Crocker runs an empire

Kankri: Who broke the coffee pot? I’m not mad, I just want to know.
Latula: I did. I broke it.
Kankri: No. No you didn’t. Cronus?
Cronus: Don’t look at me, look at Mituna.
Mituna: What?! I didn’t break it!
Cronus: Huh, that’s weird. How’d you even know it was broken?
Mituna: Because it’s– sitting right in front of us– and it’s broken!
Cronus: Suspicious.
Mituna: No it’s not!!!!!
Aranea: If it matters, probably not… Damara was the last one to use it.
Damara: Liar! I don’t even drink that crap!
Aranea: Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Damara: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Serket!
Latula: Okay, let’s not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, kankz.
Kankri: No! Who broke it!?
Meenah: Kankri, Kurloz’s been awfully quiet this whole time.
Kurloz: 
…………………/´¯/)
………………./…./
…………./´¯/’…’/´¯¯`·¸
………./’/…/…./……./¨¯\
……..(’(…´…´…. ¯~/’…’)
……….…………….’…../
……….“….……… _.·´
………….………….(
…………………………
(Yelling)
(Camera pans to Kankri)
Kankri: I broke it. But can you imagine the blow to my reputation?