large spiders

Little Matylda Krzesińska, (in)famous ballerina and first love of the last Tsar

Mathilde´s favourite occupation on summer mornings was to rise with the dawn and pick mushrooms. As she was afraid of spiders she always took along a big stick to clear the webs from her path. Once, without thinking, she rushed towards a wonderful mushroom under a tree, only to be confronted by a large web. The spider settled on her nose, and the petrified Mathilde dropped the basket and ran home at breakneck speed, screaming all the way, without even brushing the hated spired from her face.

Mathilde was treated like a princess on her birthday, which was always celebrated as a holiday at Krasnitzy and in the surrounding estates and villages. Friends came from the capital bearing gifts and in the evening the grounds were lit by lamps as magnificent fireworks filled the sky. Afterwards there was a lavish supper with hot Swedish punch, during which a wreath of flowers descended from the ceiling on to Mathilde´s head.

Coryne Hall: Imperial Dancer

Imagine Person A picking up Person B and carrying them away because they were about to do something stupid. Person A is calm and quiet when doing this and Person B is throwing something of a fit, saying “Just let me do this!”

Alternate: Person B immediately starts calming down when Person A picks them up and curls up into a ball.

DM: The room is filled with thick spider webs. As the door slams open, your hear the footsteps of a very large, very heavy, spider.

Barbarian: Burn it?

Cleric: Burn it.

Barbarian: *closes the door, steps back, and throws 4 lit torches on the thatch roof*

DM: … You hear the high pitched screech of the spiders as the roof crumbles and the house goes up in flames.

Ranger/Cleric/Monk: Spiders? Spiders? With… an S… plural?

DM: Yes.

Cleric: Are… are they all dead?

anonymous asked:

Dragon Age II companions react to finding out that Hawke has arachnophobia (fear of spiders)?

Varric: Chuckles, writing notes and colorful phrases as he listens to Hawke’s objections.

Aveline: Shrugs and does not think any less of Hawke.

Fenris: Giggles, but makes no comment. In fact he refuses to comment at all when Hawke insists.

Anders: Reassures Hawke, at length, about how everyone has weird fears. In fact, fear of spiders isn’t uncommon, and it’s not really that surprising considering the spiders they’ve seen.

Merrill: Wonders what the big deal is, until someone explains that it’s not just the large spiders that Hawke’s afraid of. Then she repeatedly asks why Hawke doesn’t just squish them.

Isabela: Finds rubber spiders to hide in Hawke’s boots.

Sebastian: Sympathizes. Admits to a fear of those creepy little centipede things that live in damp basements.

~Sister Starla

I Think He’s My Soulmate

Originally posted by marvelgifs

Peter Parker x Reader

I Think He’s My Soulmate

Author: Morgan

Prompt: Okay, so we had a few Peter Parker soulmate au’s requested and Hannah’s writing one, but I was having FEEEEEEELS so have this one too.

Note: Soulmate au. Because I am a ho for them. A ho, I tell you. Also, let’s pretend that everyone is happy and unaffected by the Civil War. Yay!

Warnings: None?

“Ummmm, Uncle Clint?” it wasn’t often you called your uncle, but this was a special occasion. It was your sixteenth birthday, and because of that, your soulmate tattoo had finally appeared. It scared the crap out of you at first sight, given the fact that it looked like a large spider was crawling up your wrist.

Of course, it being your birthday didn’t mean you could stay home from school, so you were standing in the courtyard just after school had ended, calling your only connection to the Avengers at the first opportunity you had.

“Yes, sweet child of my sister?”

“Do you think you could arrange for me to meet Spiderman?”

“Um, sure. Why?”

“I’m 90% sure he’s my soulmate. And also, it’s my birthday, so…”

“Wait, go back to the first reason.”

“My soulmate tattoo showed up today and it’s a spider. It’s exactly the one that’s on his uniform. And if all soulmate tattoos work this way…” you lowered your voice, looking around. “Then he knows about my powers too.”

“Okay, okay, calm down. Can you come to the Facility today? I could introduce you. But he’s gotta be on his way here. He’s staying for the weekend. I’ll check his wrist and text you, okay?”

“Okay,” you nodded. “Okay.”

“I’ll see you later then.”

“Thanks Uncle Clint. I owe you.”

“No prob, kiddo.”

***

“Parker, lemme see your wrist.” Clint walked over to the teen as soon as he walked into the Facility, his overnight duffle bag hanging from his shoulder.

“What? Why?” Peter tugged his sleeve down over the tattoo that had appeared a few months before on his birthday.

“Peter.” Clint tilted his head. “I know you’ve got your soulmate tattoo. Let me see.”

“Um…” Peter paused, taking a breath before pulling the sleeve of his hoodie back up his arm. There were four symbols arranged in a diamond etched into his wrist. It was a flame, a leaf, a gust of wind, and water waves. “I…I think my soulmate is the Avatar, Mr. Barton.”

“That’s what I thought.” Clint nodded. He sent you a text as quickly as his thumbs would move. ‘grab your overnight bag, (Y/N). You’re spending the weekend with the Avengers’

***

Your parents were okay with you spending the weekend with your uncle. You didn’t tell them the other reason you were going to the Facility, but they sort of had an idea. Clint himself borrowed one of the quinjets and flew to the tower to meet you and take you back to the Facility.

“What did he say? Did he say anything?”

“Not much before I left. He just said, and I quote, ‘I think my soulmate is the Avatar, Mr. Barton’. And then I left.”

“What’s he like? Is he tall? Short? Nice? What does he look like?” you bombarded him with questions, but Clint only smirked.

“What’s the fun in telling you, kiddo? You’ve gotta find out for yourself.”

“Uncle Cliiiint.”

“(Y/NNNNNN),” he chuckled, ruffling your hair. “You’re worse than your cousins.”

“Shut up.”

The quinjet touched down under an hour later. Clint walked into the Facility with you by his side. Your guest pass dangled around your neck by a lanyard as you were escorted to your room. You had stayed here a few times over the years, but not since Spiderman had emerged.

Your room was waiting just as you had left it, right next door to Wanda’s room. There was a knock on the doorframe. Wanda brushed a lock of her hair over her shoulder, going in for a hug.

“Hi Wanda!” God, you loved Wanda. She was like a daughter to Clint, making her like a cousin to you. Not long after, a streak of silver rushed in and trapped you in a Maximoff sandwich. You loved the twins.

“What are you doing here, (Y/N)?” Pietro asked. “I thought you weren’t coming up until winter break.”

“My soulmate tattoo showed up.”

“Let me see.” Wanda insisted, pushing her brother away so she could see your wrist. She gasped softly at the sight of the black spider. “Do you want me to introduce you?”

“Yeah, that’d be great.” your heart was racing. It was real. It was really happening. Your soulmate was here and he was a superhero. Pietro raced ahead of all of you, leaving you, Clint, and Wanda in the dust. You got to the living room, where Peter was sitting at the table finishing his Algebra homework. He pushed his reading glasses up his nose.

As soon as you walked through the door, he twitched, looking up. Spidey-sense, you figured. He had mad reflexes, that much Clint had told you, but you had never seen his face. God, he was a cutie. Warm brown eyes, tousled brown hair, a kind nervous smile and soft pink lips to go with it. He was super cute. You smiled, waving shyly and when you did, he caught a glance of the tattoo on your wrist.

Peter’s jaw dropped. You had never seen anyone get up so fast. He practically ran to you, looking at the tattoo in disbelief. Somehow, he had known the moment you walked in, but this mark was confirmation.

“H-hi,” he introduced himself nervously. He gulped, trembling just a little bit. “I, um…I’m Peter. Peter Parker. S-Spiderman. I wondered when you would show up, um…”

“(Y/N).” you stated. He offered his hand, immediately regretting it. You were his soulmate and the best he could do was a handshake? Stupid, stupid, stupid. “(Y/N) (L/N). I’m Clint’s sister’s kid.” You shook his hand, smiling. God, he was super cute. Your nervousness had worn off, but Peter felt like he was going to explode. He didn’t want to mess this up.

“I…I’m sorry, is it okay if I hug you? I’m sorry, you’re just super pretty, and I’m really bad in romantic situations, so-”

You rushed into his arms, holding him close. He was so warm, and you could feel his body shaking. He laughed nervously, wrapping his arms around you.

“So um…my tattoo is the four elements. Does that mean you’re the Avatar?”

“I can control the four elements, yeah.” you laughed. “Who knows? I could be.”

“Ah, young love.” Tony walked into the living room. “Finally found your soulmate, Parker?”

“Yeah,” Peter nodded, still clinging to you. “I did.” He sighed, whispering into your ear. “Can I just hold you forever? I don’t want to let go.”

“Sure,” you chuckled, snuggling deeper into him. You buried your face in the crook of his neck. “Sounds like a plan to me.” You were stuck together like magnets, unable to tear yourselves from each other. It was a bizarre feeling, like time had finally started after all of these years, like two halves of a whole were finally reunited. Something clicked, and suddenly everything was right in the universe.

***

Later that night, you were sitting in the lounge with the Avengers, some movie about mutant superheroes fighting a big blue ancient mutant or something was playing on the screen. You and Peter were seated beside eachother, his arm around your shoulders, and your head resting against his chest.

Peter’s free hand absentmindedly traced the tattoo on your wrist, still not quite convince that today was real. It felt too good to be true. But here you were, snuggled up to him. The other Avengers only glanced over and smiled from time to time, happy that their little spider had finally found his soulmate.

“Am I an okay soulmate?” Peter whispered, looking to you for reassurance.

“Are you kidding me? You’re the best.” you laughed, pressing a long kiss to his cheek. Peter’s face flushed red. He smiled.

“I can’t be the best.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because you are.” he stated. You chuckled.

“Dork,” you nudged him gently. “But a cute dork.”

“So um…are you…are we dating now? Am I your boyfriend?”

“If that’s all right with you, yeah.”

“Okay. Good.” Peter smiled, pulling you closer. “I like the sound of that.”

“So do I.”

***

The weekend passed in a flash. It went by so fast you felt like you had whiplash. But before you knew it, you were back in school on Monday, waiting for the day you would get to see Peter again. You had arranged to meet a few weekends later at his apartment, but you had exchanged numbers and had been texting all day between classes.

You were standing at your locker after school, grabbing the things you needed to do your homework when your phone vibrated. You checked it. A text from Peter.

Turn around.

You read it, heart racing. You’ve never turned around so fast in your life, but there he is at the end of the hall, looking at you in disbelief. He ran as fast as he feet would carry him, engulfing you in his arms.

“You go to Midtown?” you asked. He nodded.

“I saw you like four times today, but I was never sure it was you, but it is, and-” you cut him off with your lips. They were even softer and smoother than you imagined. He melted into the kiss, letting out a blissful moan while his hands grabbed at your hips.

When you pulled apart, Peter took your hand. You slung your backpack over your shoulders.

“Well, since you’re here, do you wanna come back to my apartment now? Meet my Aunt May? We could work on homework or watch a movie or cuddle or-” You pressed a kiss to his cheek, causing them to flush red.

“Yes. I’d love that.”

SMH as things I don't remember doing at a party last night
  • Shitty: spends about an hour and a half discussing dick science (i.e. bouyancy)
  • Jack: absent mindedly strokes a friend's hair
  • Ransom: [rubbing his foot on the fireplace] "will tater love me now?"
  • Holster: says "bip bip bip" on every stair he goes up/down
  • Lardo: [changes into short shorts, sits with her legs wide open] "I feel safe"
  • Bitty: "if you get the chance to stick your dick in sidney crosby, /you stick your dick in sidney crosby/"
  • Nursey: [holding up a pizza cutter] "this circle cuts other circles into triangles"
  • Dex: hands nursey a large decorative spider, says "he's soft" and then lays on the ground
  • Chowder: [laying on the floor crying] "dex if I die tell the sharks I love them"
  • Tango: "I think I just blacked out. I closed my eyes for a second and then I opened them" (a friend, sighing) "you blinked"
  • Whiskey: [playing strip truth or dare] to tango: [waves hand dismissively] "dare, you know my limits"
  • Kent: [points to the glittery decorative skull resting on his head] "I sucked a dick with this mouth"

also picked up gary’s plants from work today– repotted the aloe and one of the spider plants, did some pruning/maintenance on the monstrously large spider plant and will repot later tonight after we have din. nice to have plantz

Unforgivable

[Neville Longbottom is sitting through his first DADA class of fourth year, listening to the new mildly alarming professor, Mad-Eye Moody]

Moody: Now, can anybody tell me another Unforgivable curse?

[The entire class, including Neville himself, is shocked when he raises his hand.]

Neville: Well, there is one…

[Moody stares at Neville for what starts to feel like an uncomfortably long time before breaking the silence]

Moody: … Longbottom… Isn’t it?

*Flashback*

Barty Crouch Jr: … Who do we have here?

Barty Crouch Jr: … Longbottom… Isn’t it?

*Flashback Ends*

Neville: *nods*

[Moody proceeds to take a large spider out of a jar and places it on Neville’s desk, pointing his wand at it]

[Neville watches in horror as the tarantula writhes and twitches in apparent and excruciating pain]

Hermione: Stop it! Can’t you see it’s bothering him?? STOP IT!!

[Moody places the spider, still twitching, back into the jar, and turns to address the class]

Moody: Pain. You don’t need thumbscrews or knives to torture someone if you can perform the Cruciatus Curse….That one was very popular once, too.

FIN

lilith maryam-lalonde is a little weirdo girl but is still very soft & is fiercely protective of the people she luvs.. shes 6 years old and knows every constellation by heart cuz she begged rose to teach them all to her when she realized they look just like her and kanaya. also spent hours researching spiders so she could properly catch and remove them from her arachnophobic best friend named spiders

Spiders And Malec |With The Addition Of Clary|

Magnus was in the middle of an important Clave meeting when his phone started ringing, a few glares later and a “Excuse me” he answers it. 
“Hello?”
“Magnus you need to come here right n-IT MOVED!”
“What moved? Alexander what is going on?”
“IT’S MOVING!!” Clary shrieked
“Magnus there’s a very large and very dangerous spider here and we need you to magic it away..”
“Why don’t you just kill it?”
“Are you kidding me? What did that spider ever do to me or you?”
“Then leave it.”
Clary snatched the phone out of Alec’s hand.
“ARE YOU CRAZY! IT COULD BE SOME RADIOACTIVE GAY SPIDER!” {A/N Oh references..}
“Clary please return the mobile device back to it’s original owner.”
“What?”
“GIVE ALEC THE PHONE! CLARY!”
“What do we do?”
“I cannot believe this is happening, Alexander Gideon Lightwood you are 18 years old. You are overreacting over a goddamn spider. Clary Fray you need to stop encouraging this immature and stupid behaviour from my boyfriend and get over yourselves. Now, I am in a important meeting and if I get another phone call I will use my magic to make you suffer.”
With that Magnus hung up, “Did we literally just get yelled at like we were children from a 400 year old warlock?” Clary spoke up, looking at Alec. “Yes, it seems we did.” There was a minute of silence. 
“Jace?” “Jace.” 

Creepypasta #1013: Helping My Sister

Length: Short

I’m used to my sister calling me at all hours needing help. She’s a single parent, with a young daughter, and she doesn’t cope too well. So far she’s called me to catch a large spider in her kitchen, to comfort her when she had an argument with her best friend, and to lend her money when she totalled her car. But what she wanted tonight, this is just weird.

She was crying and begging me to come over because her daughter was drawing supernatural pictures. I’ve seen several of these things and they don’t look supernatural to me. They’re just pictures of stuff a child of Alice’s age would draw, one shows what I suppose is a dog or a cat with a tail and a huge grin. Another shows a house with a chimney and smoke coming out of it. Another shows what I guess is a portrait of my sister, with exaggerated big eyes and hair. Nothing unusual. Colourful, cheerful pictures.

Except that every single one has been scribbled over in deep angry black lines. The pencil has slashed tears in the paper in places.

“I hate to say this,” I tell my sister, “but this isn’t supernatural. It looks like Alice is having some anger issues. Maybe she needs a therapist.”

“No,” says my sister. She walks into the lounge and gets Alice’s latest picture, this time its obviously me, smiling, with vicious black lines all over my face.

I go into the lounge to ask Alice why she’s so angry. But Alice doesn’t appear to be angry. I see Alice sitting on the couch. I see the paper she’s drawing on stacked up on the edge of the table, and I see the picture she’s working on. This one appears to be a picture of a fairground, with a rather lopsided rollercoaster. The picture itself is obviously complete because the black lines are being scribbled so fast onto the picture that it is a wonder the pencil doesn’t break.

But the thing was that Alice isn’t touching the pencil.

Credits to: BECKYISHERE