Douchebro status: confirmed.

Basic gym day. Two miles of intervals. Too many (not enough) clean and jerks.

It’s too hot for a real meal. I’m eating a piece of tilapia, some frozen pineapple, and drinking all the seltzer. This book is supplementing any nourishment my diet may lack.

Tagged By Jack

 Always post the rules. Answer the questions of the person who tagged you and write 11 new ones. 
Tag 11 people and link them.  Let them know they are tagged.

1. If you could say one thing to President Obama, what would you say?
Let’s play ball.

2. Would you rather cook a great meal to serve someone or go to your dream restaurant for a free meal?
Cooking is stressful. Feed me.

3. Is there a song you cannot listen to because of the memories it brings up? If so, what song and what artist?
No. I love music too much. I love all the memories, no matter the pain.

4. If you could time travel backwards but know it’s a one-way trip back, what era would you like to travel to/live in?
I’m currently reading Stephen King’s 11/22/63, so this is a great question. I’d go back to just before the internet was invented. Boy, I could tell some stories.

5. What is your favorite sandwich?
Pastrami on rye with Swiss cheese and a dill pickle.

6. What is one thing you’re secretly great at but almost never get to demonstrate?
I’m a fine dancer. No, really.

7. Puffed or crunchy, what is your stand on cheez doodles?
I will eat them either way and not complain a whit.

8. Do you have anything from your childhood that you have kept as a memento?
I have a few of my father’s shirts, a bunch of G.I. Joes, and a box of Legos.

9. What book should I read next and why?
11/22/63. Because it’s blowing my mind.

10. Is soft ice cream a legitimate treat?
Yes. It’s only a few molecules away from plastic, but it does the trick.

11. What celebrities are on your “hall pass” list?
Jaimie Alexander
Evangeline Lilly
Kristen Bell
Lucy Liu
Diane Lane

Eleven questions
1. Do you have any ridiculous superstitions?
2. If you could move anywhere in the world, where would it be?
3. If you were a celebrity, would you fake your own death?
4. What is your dream car?
5. Would you rather clean the house or do laundry?
6. Be in a great band or become a famous athlete?
7. Are you a cat person or dog person?
8. What is your greatest fear?
9. You just found out when you’re going to die. Does this scare you or free you?
10. What is one of the most significant moments of your life?
11. Would you beat up your dad if your life depended on it?

Because Your Comments Are Mine To Share

receiver replied to your post: Damn My Own Anti-Consumerism

Surf Ninjas; Renaissance Man; Major Payne; Pale Rider; Karate Kid I, II and III; What Dreams May Come; The Last Airbender cartoon series. (If you only put one of these suggestions on there, it should be the Airbender cartoons.)

Dude. Major Payne? MAJOR PAYNE!?! I love you. - “Killing is my business and business is good!”

ladyofthehouse replied to your post: Damn My Own Anti-Consumerism

10 Things I Hate About You will forever make me think of you. Oh, and “The Shit hath hitteth the fan… ith.”

I love that quote. Love it.

sallydoodle replied to your post: Damn My Own Anti-Consumerism

great list! i also love moonstruck. “I love you.” “Snap out of it!”

A classic.

myturtlespeedy replied to your post: Damn My Own Anti-Consumerism

The Princess Bride - “When I was your age, television was called books.”

I love that movie almost entirely for this one moment: “I want my father back, you son of a bitch.”

aliceadair replied to your post: Damn My Own Anti-Consumerism

Goonies — “Down here is -our- time.”, The Truth About Cats and Dogs — “You can love your pets, just don’t -love- your pets.”, Sense and Sensibility, Muppets Take Manhattan — “Rats is peoples, frogs is peoples, peoples is peoples.”

Yes, yes, yes, and yes.

People you should follow

and probably do, but hey, it never hurts to throw these out there. It’s funny how the people I would recommend now are not the people I would have expected to recommend when I first started following people, but hey, that’s the way the tumblr rolls. These are people I try not to miss.

A wonderful writer, both serious and hilarious; a wonderful person, someone who encourages and tears down with equal zest.

Marilyn and I have had more fun lately with music than I’ve had with anyone else in my life, except my immediate family. Truly a gem.

Speaking of music, this guy, right here. He knows a lot, and posts great songs that are usually deep cuts and not the first track you’d think of from a classic album. Respect.

If I don’t hear from Dan, I’m all like, hey, where’s Dan? He’s funny, kind, cool, likes beer like me, and he was in a band that played INXS songs. Say no more!

Jaye has been getting a lot of love lately, and she deserves it. I love the way she thinks, the way she shows how she feels, the way she shares her life. I start my day with her morning post, like titsandsass, (who I know you follow) I need her on my dash.


 sallydoodle replied to your postOI! Can we just like, stop posting those maple…

right?? i’m trying to be good to fit into a dress in a couple of weeks and then come the bacon maple donuts - good god.

 ladyofthehouse replied to your postOI! Can we just like, stop posting those maple…

um… why in the f*ck are you trying to diet? A) dieting is crap and unnecessary. B) Sugar and fat makes life worth living. C) If there’s less of you to love, I’ll cry

God yeah I totally agree but I’m doing it for the exact same reason as Doodle. 

I bought this Biba dress for my cousin’s wedding about 3 weeks ago. I loved it! Problem was there was only one left IN THE WORLD (that’s probably an exaggeration or whatever) and though it looks like it fits, the zip gets stuck hmm about half way up, eek!

Meh, I bought it anyway with the goal of shedding a few pounds in the 8 eight weeks I had. Now it’s five, and I’ve done fuck all but eat ridiculous amounts and pizza and Ben & Jerrys, so the diet starts today.

Fear not my Lady, I hate dieting and love ALL THE FOOD, so once this bloody wedding is over they’ll be plenty of me to love again :’)

iPod Shuffle Meme

Tagged by ladyofthehouse

  1. Johnny Cash - Cocaine Blues
  2. Andrew Bird - Give It Away
  3. Iron & Wine - Flightless Bird, American Mouth
  4. The White Stripes -  Ball and Biscuit
  5. Rilo Kiley - The Absence of God
  6. Townes Van Zandt - Waitin’ Around To Die
  7. The Walkmen - Love Is Luck
  8. Ben Folds Five - Song For the Dumped
  9. Josh Ritter - Girl in the War
  10. Radiohead - Fake Plastic Trees (Acoustic Version)
  11. Jeff Buckley - Lilac Wine
  12. Grateful Dead - Friend of the Devil
  13. Ralph Stanley - Gloryland
  14. Nirvana - Scentless Apprentice
  15. Ray Charles - Drown In My Own Tears
  16. Cat Power - The Greatest
  17. Talking Heads - Burning Down the House
  18. Elliott Smith - Needle In the Hay
  19. EELS - Gone Man
  20. Jessica Lea Mayfield - We’ve Never Lied




In celebration, the Familia Cranquis is going out of town for the weekend!

(Actually, to a friend’s wedding somewhere in the US).

(No, not a wedding in Florida, which would be just too weird of a coincidence with TLOTH’s wedding-based Florida trip this weekend.)

I regret to inform you all that the queue, she is empty. So, there will be a paucity of posts this weekend. BUT, I will use this trip as an opportunity to get the ball rolling on that promised treasure hunt. (AHEM, Pranquistadors, have your deciphering fingers ready!)

so, this Ducks game is pretty intense. I have a hard time with team sports, because I sympathize with both teams. I can’t play team sports at all, but I like to watch some of them.

the Trojans are really making the Ducks work for it, and there’s a chance they might even pull off a win, but it’s still hard to see them when they’re disappointed. 

I honestly can’t remember how this conversation with Jennifer and the Lady and Doctor of The House started, but it went something like this…

me: I used to play softball and baseball, but I pretended to sprain my ankle so I never had to play in the games.

Dr Baffled: …why?

Jennifer: because she’s JULES.

me: well, I didn’t want to disappoint anyone by saying I didn’t want to play, but if I played well, the other team lost, and if I played badly, I let my team down. I felt terrible no matter what. but one time I actually sprained my ankle and didn’t have to play. I am super injury-prone, so no one suspected and it was a win no matter what. I got to play in the practices, and sit in the dugout and support the team at games, which was all I really wanted.  and then I broke my hand at the batting cages before the season started, the year I was on the baseball team, so I never played with that team. I just don’t want anyone to have to lose.

Dr Baffled: nope. if they wanted to win, they shouldn’t have lost. 

anyway, I’m doing what I do the way I always do. supporting my team from the sidelines, and feeling badly for them both when they struggle. xoxoxoxo


apparently I intend to only wear blue for the rest of the season.

ladyofthehouse replied to your post: so, um. …how many stripey blue sweater dresses is…

it’s not a problem until you need another closet. or four.

womaninterrupted replied to your post: so, um. …how many stripey blue sweater dresses is…

If you like it buy three, at least.

gingeredjess replied to your post: so, um. …how many stripey blue sweater dresses is…

There are never too many! I love those and if I could find them here, I’d have one too! <3

excellent advice! I opted for these three things. (not the skirt, but the sweater and both sweater dresses. I like the second one better, but if I lose any more weight it will be too big, hence the inability to make decisions. also that is just what happens to me in dressing rooms. and I also bought three pairs of leggings. I need more stockings too, but I want to go back to Sock Dreams in Portland for those, they have a great selection.) 

so this is what I brought into the dressing room. I might have a small fixation. but I still love my other stripey sweater dress more than any of these.

sorry there is so much of my face today, but you’re all used to it by now, right? xoxoxoxo

ladyofthehouse asked:

Eeek! Eeek! You have a new Jooooob don't you?! You are going to do something WONDERFUL aren't you?! You're going to be somewhere where everybody knows how AMAZING you are, right? RIGHT?! EEEEEEEE!!!! [bounce bounce bounce]

this is a pretty perfect assessment of my news!

and what I think I can say without breaking the rules is that I am going to be working for an organization which does amazing community work that I believe in with my whole heart, where people love and appreciate me, and communicate openly and try to support each other in everything they do.

it is still part time, and still no benefits, but there is potential for longevity and expansion, the pay is better, and most importantly, I am going to be looking forward to going to work, feeling useful, and working with amazing people every day, and that is going to make my days and life better in so SO many ways, I cannot tell you.

(also bouncing and possibly twirling)

xoxoxoxo <3<3<3


I didn’t know that there was anything on the back of my dalek dress until I put it on this morning. now I love it even more. (it says exterminate, in case you can’t read wrinkly mirrored writing) someone asked me if I was a ladybug, but I did have my hoodie over most of it so you can’t really blame him. he also told me he loves me but that’s just because I gave him money. still, nice to hear.

also, TLOTH sent me this incredible piece of jewelry, which there is probably a name for, and I love it so much. I want to wear it always. ♥ xoxoxoxo

Sneaky snarky...

I should be entering New York city limits at this time tomorrow!

To say I’ve got a few emotions running around right now would be an understatement. I feel bad for my first meet-up victim, TLOTH, that may just get squeezed too hard and pass out when we meet for a simple coffee.

andribbonsofeuphoria answered your post: Has anyone seen my iPhone charger?

Its in my butt.

ariverisariver answered your post: Has anyone seen my iPhone charger?

it’s over there

ladyofthehouse answered your post: Has anyone seen my iPhone charger?

the housewife in me says to check your other pants.

damsel-is-distress replied to your post: Has anyone seen my iPhone charger?

*mom voice* did you look in the last place you had it?

julierthanyou answered your post: Has anyone seen my iPhone charger?

charger? i don’t even know her.

These are pretty much the answers I would expect to get from you guys, thanks for never letting me down.

And I definitely expected that sort of answer from Heather.

External image

Your Comments Make Me Feel Better

I don’t know how else to say thank you.

myturtlespeedy replied to your postAll of the Feelings

High tide? /tosses you a line

Yes, thank you - especially for saving my metaphor.  

clairesalcedo replied to your postAll of the Feelings

*ALLTHEHUGS!* agh, I wish I there was food teleportation! I’d send you cupcakes!

Mmm…. what kind of cupcakes.  I need to fantasize properly.

helms-deep replied to your postAll of the Feelings

Hugs and positivity being sent down south to you, buddy. You know what? You just need to get your butt up here and hang out for a week so we can cook and bake for you, and pamper the hell out of you. Just sayin’.

You better be careful or you guys are gonna wind up with an extended house guest.

ladyofthehouse replied to your postAll of the Feelings

You are allowed to have days like these. It’s human. Say the word and I’m on a plane out there. Okay?

baffledinbrooklyn replied to your postAll of the Feelings

I can ship TLOTH out there on a plane if you need. Just say the word.

Hehe, I love you guys.

crumpeteatingwoofter replied to your postAll of the Feelings

Ugh, I get this, I really do :( MASSIVE cuddly hugs, darling.

Massive, cuddly hugs from you is like a total win.  I’m glad you’ve been back around, sweets.  

receiver replied to your postAll of the Feelings

America’s Got Talent makes me feel bad all the time, too. Except for those damn dogs—they got me, for some reason.

Yeah, the dogs totally got me too.  I don’t know what happened, but I was laughing aloud.

shovelbum replied to your postAll of the Feelings

HUGS!! Wish you were here, hugs and beers would be had. If it makes you feel any better, you are frequently in conversation. All good, of course. :)

Don’t worry! TLOTH is a certified hug transporter.  She should be giving you hugs from me, and I’ll be collecting hugs from you in July.  

eebees replied to your postAll of the Feelings


You and myturtlespeedy, saving my bad metaphors one comment at a time.

I also wanted to mention a few people who posted awesome comments earlier but Tumblr is being stupid and not letting me share them.

womaninterrupted who made me laugh thinking about sleeping in a bed of lettuce.

aliceadair who understands the importance of naps and pastries.

glitterbubbles who is also a certified hug transporter.

sallydoodle who occasionally feeds and waters me.

aprilkristin who peppers my ask box with side comments that make me smile.

Ugh.  I feel like I’ve listed a hundred Tumblrers, and yet still missed so many of you who are so wonderful and make me smile every day.  I’m so lucky to have such nice people following me.