endless list of favorite female characters [21/?] - Waverly Earp ↳ I’m a freak who knows the most lethal place to stab someone bigger than you is through the ear. Yes, I’m the freak who knows witches can’t cross lines of salt, which is pretty handy right now. And I’m the freak who six months ago would’ve too polite to mention that that big old diamond on your finger, not only is it cubic zirconium, but it is ugly as shit!
Lights go out, the crowd goes silent. A huge unicorn appears onstage. The gays flock on the field wearing nothing but relics from the “Artpop” era.
Suddenly, a voice echoes throughout the stadium:
“It doesn’t matter if you love him, or capital H I M”
A republican drops dead.
The unicorn explodes, releasing a cloud of glitter and grease. Tom Brady chokes on this eleganza. Gaga emerges wearing nothing but an American flag.
She sings the first verse and chorus of “Born this Way”, immediately destroying every nuclear weapon in the world.
She stops, looks straight at the camera: “My name is lady Gaga, but you can call me Joanne”.
An electric guitar bursts into flames while Gaga belts out “Perfect Illusion”, dismantling the white supremacy. The song suddenly fades out into “Manicure” for fifteen seconds.
A dance interlude storms onstage, while the “Venus” chants morphs into “Dance in the Dark”. An exorcism is performed live onstage.
The démon rises up, followed by “Bad Romance”. The Wesboro Baptist Church disappears into oblivion. GOP is drowned into hot cheetos, which allows time for Cher to become the first female US president.
The new United States of America is reborn to the tune of “Poker Face”, sung as a duet with Tony Bennett. Lady Gaga kicks a football and score a touchdown. Texas becomes officially gay™.
The performance ends, as Tony Bennett drops his flesh suit to reveal… BEYONCÉ!!! “Téléphone Part 2/Judas/Video Phone” mash up grants three wishes to every person who ever bought “Joanne” and watched “AHS: Hotel”. Laganja Estranja death drops on Joe Biden’s face.
Lady Gaga shoots fireworks from her Versace boobs while singing “The edge of Glory”, effectively ending homophobia everywhere in the world.
The stadium erupts in applause, as Lady Gaga’s voice fades away, singing the iconic bridge from “Applause”.
A jock in the audience turns to Barack Obama wearing a rainbow jacket, and whispers “She did that.” Obama answers “yes, she did.”
This is a list of korean dramas I have finished watching. I’m posting this list so I can keep track of which dramas I start/finish in 2016.
♦ Boys Over Flowers ♦ Flowerboy Next Door ♦ You’re Beautiful
♦ Playful Kiss ♦ Baby-faced Beauty ♦ To the Beautiful You ♦ Personal Taste ♦ Coffee Prince
♦ Prosecutor Princess ♦ Witch’s Romance ♦ Cunning Single Lady
♦ Master’s Sun
♦ Birth of a Beauty
♦ Emergency Couple
♦ I Hear Your Voice
♦ Kill Me, Heal Me
♦ I Order You
♦ Hello Monster/I Remember You
♦ Flower Boy Ramen Shop
♦ High Society
♦ Fated to Love You
♦ The Greatest Love
♦ It’s Okay That’s Love (2015)
♦ Sensory Couple
♦ Cheer Up!/Sassy Go Go (2015)
♦ She Was Pretty (2015) ♦ Noble, My Love (2015) ♦ Oh My Venus (2016) ♦ The Village: Achiara’s Secret (2016)
The year refers to the year which I finished the drama in. Some dramas don’t have dates as I don’t remember when I watched them. >.< Either I have a bad memory or 2015 was a good drama year.
I know some of the paladins refer to their lions as ‘he’ but my friends and I ( @ayyybrahamlincoln ) came up with our own headcanon for what the lions are. Because you know what’s way better than silly boy lions? Old lady lions. Complete with crotchety voices that you have to voice out loud during episodes. Come now, why else do you think it takes them so long to remember they have these cool weapons? I think at one point Shiro says he hasn’t “unlocked” some of the weapons for the black lion and there’s this implication that the stronger your bond is with your lion, the more tools become available to you. This is too straight forward and logical. All the lions are actually old ladies, having been sitting around letting their memory fade for ten thousand years, and unfortunately getting back into the Voltron lifestyle is not quite as easy as getting back on a bike. You don’t unlock any weapons. The lions just take forever to remember they have them.
Black: Goodness gracious, this robot is ripping us a new one (hey, they’re old ladies and they’ve seen some shit). Margaret, didn’t you have something to hit all those lasers with?
Yellow: What’s that? Something to fit all the phasers in?
Green: We don’t even have phasers, you old coot! That’s not a weapon in this universe. Didn’t you have some sort of gun thing for this?
Yellow: A gun? No, no, Gladys, I’ve got a sword.
Blue: That’s Rosie’s sword, dearie.
Yellow: Oh. Well then what’s this pesky bit of code here? Does that say ‘Shooder Camon’? What in blue blazes is that?
Red: We’re all going to die.
Black: Shoulder cannon, sweet pea. That’s what we need. Now go tell that strapping young paladin of your’s so we can load it up.
Jack Zimmermann was accustomed to dealing with difficult situations;
he was captain of the Samwell Men’s
Hockey team after all, but this? Thiswas never in the job description.
“Can I tell you a secret?” Bitty whispered into the side of
Jack’s neck, breath hot and sweet against his skin. The kegster ended a while
ago but Bitty was still feeling the effects. When he fell off the coffee table
attempting to dance to All the Single Ladies, Jack swept in ready to piggyback
him to bed.
“Alright,” Jack said, mouthing I got this in Lardo’s direction before heading to the stairs.
“I don’t wanna be a single lady anymore,” His voice faltered
and Jack became acutely aware of Bitty’s thighs around his hips. “I want a
person. Everybody else has got a person.”
“With moves like that I don’t think you’ll have to wait
long,” Jack said, supressing a chuckle.
“Mmhmm,” Bitty mumbled, fighting a losing war against sleep.
Jack pushed open the door to Bitty’s room with his foot and ducked inside.