lady on a bike

okay here’s another story, aka the robbed robber story that i still can’t believe to this day:

okay so my mom’s husband and i were driving past a parking lot, and this couple is getting into their car. this robber runs up to the woman and snatches her purse, then jumps on his bike and starts riding off. and i’m like. oh god, we need to help this lady. then, her and her boyfriend or whatever jump in the car (it’s like a pickup truck) and they follow the robber with the bike. when they catch up, the lady fucking sticks a broom stick or tree branch or something out the window and knocks the robber onto the cement. she gets out of the car and im thinking she’s just gonna get her purse, then her bf gets out and im like ready to call the cops if these people start fighting. but she grabs her purse and her bf fucking tAKES THE ROBBER’S BIKE AND PUTS IT IN THE BACK OF THE TRUCK. then they got in and left thE ROBBER LAYING ON THE FLOOR ?????

i don’t know what to think of this story ?? like dont rob people or youll get jabbed with a stick and ur bike will be stolen

Night on the Town

Requested: “I want you.” with Jason Todd

(Y/n) smiled checking over her outfit one more time. She was wearing a pair of tight black pants and red tank top. She turned around grabbing Jay’s jacket and headed out the door. (Y/n) was meeting up with her boyfriend, his brother, and whatever girl was currently on Dick’s arm. She smiled when she heard the familiar tapping on her window and turned to open it.

“I have a perfectly good door Jay” (Y/n) commented, sitting down on the windowsill.

“Where would the fun be in that doll face?” Jay stood on the fire escape his eyes racking over (y/n)’s body. She smirked, swinging her legs over to join him.

“Besides, you know you love a bit of danger” Jay smirked down at (y/n) wrapping his strong arms around her. He leaned down connecting his lips with hers. He smelled of gun powder and smoke, a scent (y/n) now loved.

“Come on, or we’ll be the ones late” (Y/n) pulled away, smacking Jay’s arm in an attempt to get him to focus.

“Alright, alright. But we aren’t taking the stairs” Jay smirked picking up (y/n) bridal style as she squealed. He then proceeded to jump, landing the two safely on the ground.

“I will never get use to that” (Y/n) stood on semi-wobbly legs as she fixed her clothes a bit before walking to Jay’s bike.

“For you my lady” Jay handed (y/n) a helmet as she sat behind Jay on his bike. (Y/) wrapped her arms around Jason’s wide torso, leaning her head on his back. She could practically see his smirk in her mind.

“Hold on baby” Jay reeved the bike sending the two into traffic and the night.

(Y/n) and Jay walked into the club finding that Dick was already situated a dark booth in the back, sucking each other’s face off.

“God, you sure you want to go over there?” Jay grimaced at the seen, wrapping his arm around (y/n)’s shoulders.

“I think we should give them a bit of privacy” (Y/n) turned away from the scene heading to the bar.

“Two beers please” (Y/n) smiled at the bartender who sent her a wink before going to get her order. Jay was behind her in seconds his arms wrapped protectively around her waist as he rested his chin on her shoulder. The bartender came back with the beers and a napkin, but he quickly tossed the napkin seeing Jay now attached to you. You laughed, handing him the money and turning around, still in Jay’s arms. (Y/n) sipped a little from her bottle and handed Jay’s his.

“You gave the poor guy a heart attack Jay” (Y/n) laughed eyeing the corner where Dick had now noticed them and was waving them over.

“We’re being summoned Jay” (Y/n) pointed with her bottle at the corner. Jay sighed, shaking his head.

“Let’s go” Jay turned around directing you to them.

The two of spent the next two hours drinking, eating, and talking until finally Silvia, this was the girl that came with Dick, wanted to go dance. Dick smiled happily complying. (Y/n) stood up waiting for Jay.

“Baby, you know I don’t dance” Jay whined, his eyes looking over your body. He had gotten more touchy with every drink, and (y/n) had gotten more giggly.

“Just this once” (Y/n) pulled on Jay’s arm trying to get him to budge. Jay shook his head and (y/n) sighed, turning to the dance floor. There she began dancing to the pulsing music, her eyes locked with Jason the entire time. It didn’t take long though until another guy had his hands on your waist his breath in your ear.

“Hey sugar, mind if-” (Y/n) didn’t get to hear the guy’s full sentence as Jay nearly threw the guy across the room. (Y/n) smirked dancing into Jay as he finally began to dance with you.

“(Y/n)” Jay whispered in (y/n)‘a ear, his hands wrapping tighter around her waist.

“Yeah” (Y/n) closed her eyes leaning back into Jay. Her body was buzzing from the contact and alcohol.

“I want you. Now.” Jason growled in (y/n)’s ear squeezing her ass. She giggled turning around and kissing him. Jay quickly pulled away, lust filling his eyes.

“No. I need you, (y/n), now” Jason grabbed your hand pulling you out into the night. Once outside of the club his eye’s searched for his bike, but (y/n) pulled him away, insisting he was too drunk and called a cab. (Y/n) climbed in the cab first, giving the directions for her house when Jay came in cutting her off.

“My house tonight” Jay grinned telling the driver his address before capturing (y/n)’s face with his hands.

“Jay, I haven’t been to your house before” (y/n) whispered between kisses as she attempted to process things.

“I think it’s long overdue, don’t you?” Jay smirked looking down at her. She was just perfect, wearing his colors, in his- Wait.

“You’re wearing my jacket” Jay’s eyes grew darker realizing that yes, she was. (Y/n) blushed, looking away. Jay held her chin, directing her back to him.

“Everything comes off but that tonight” Jay grinned his voice dropping and octave as (y/n)’s felt a rush to her core. She connected there lips again, intertwining her fingers in his hair.

“We’re here, get out of my cab” The cab driver grumbled as Jay paid him, pulling (y/n) from the cab.

“I can walk Jay” (Y/n) squealed as she gripped onto Jay. He merely chuckled, running for the elevator.

As soon as the doors closied shut close Jason set (y/n) down, attacking your neck with his lips. He bit and sucked her sweet spot, being sure to leave his mark. (Y/n) moaned, leaning against the wall and gripping the front of his shirt. It was bliss, Jay’s lips on your neck. The rest of the night however was heaven.

A/N: I hope this was good. I’m sorry if it’s trash!

anonymous asked:

Okay most interesting customer I've had so far in my supermarket. There is this old woman who is always dressed up to the nines just people going to a royal wedding, coloured costumes matching crazy hats etc. She wears that. So she comes in flawless as always taking her cart doing her shopping. In rollerblades. Rollerblades perfectly matching the colour of her outfit and matching hat. And it looks incredibly elegant when she does it and I couldn't help but think she has surpassed us and humans

For some reason this reminds me of a couple of people from the town where I grew up. First, there was this reeeeeeally old guy that rode his bicycle EVERYWHERE. Mostly mart walls since that was one of the few chain stores we had. We’d even see him two towns over, which was a half hour drive. He was always dressed in the kind of bike wear that professional bicyclists wear to races and his bikes was top of the line fancy as shit. He had to be like 80 years old. Had a lot of respect for him because, damn, I couldn’t keep up with him even when I was young.

Then there was a lady that dressed like a nun and would be seen riding her bike or walking to mart walls nearly everyday. She was NOT a nun. It was clear that she was wearing a costume. She was a loner and a huge grump. I had her go through my line when I worked at mart walls temporarily. She glared at me the whole time and refused to speak to me.

I forgot about these two til I read this ask. Haven’t thought about them in years because I have been living out of state for 10 years now. Kind of wonder if the fake nun ever accepted she’s not a nun. -Abby

Biker Gang AU

Stanley, I know you got a thing for Jimmy Snakes, but if you’d just take a moment to notice this other punk asshole, you could have a hot biker boyfriend who would actually treat you right.

This whole Jimmy Snakes thing has got me headcanoning so much gay love triangle trash. Help me.

Boston Post, Massachusetts, May 5, 1895

Fat women on bicycles.
Can you imagine it? You can’t!
Yet it happens here tomorrow.
First race called at 10:30 A.M.
If you can’t stand boisterous fun and heavy comedy, don’t attend the FAT LADIES’ BICYCLE RACES.

Broken Trust - Part Three

Summary: From what you’ve been told the British Men of Letters weren’t people you would really like. Though you didn’t expect to get that caught up with one of them, breaking the Winchester’s trust with your actions.

Words: 1608

Pairing: Eventual Arthur (Mr.) Ketch x Reader

Originally posted by marilynmay

Warnings: None really. Maybe a bit angsty at the end.

A/N: Feedback Is Appreciated! You can write yourself down for upcoming Ketch fics on my taglist. 

Masterpost

Keep reading

Fatlogic Friday

I had two instances of fatlogic out in the wild today!

1) that ridiculous morning show that was on in the background said that “oh, a new study shows that taking a hot bath is as beneficial as riding a bike for an hour.” So I was like “well that’s obviously bullshit” and read the study. First things first, the bath has to be 104 degrees for and HOUR. That is so hot and so long. I can’t stay in a hot tub that hot for more than half that time. Second! It said you burn 140 calories as opposed to 630 biking, whereas the people on the show said “slightly less” and Third, THE STUDY WAS ABOUT REGULATING BLOOD SUGAR which was not mentioned AT ALL. Just “oh, hot bath is as healthy as biking for an hour, next!”

2. Lady at the chocolate store told me that “the higher kcal content the chocolate, the better it is for your heart”. I was at a loss for words.

5

Cycled to Dianaburg today. It’s an old hunting castle from the mid-19th century, situated on a hill in the woodlands above Ehringshausen. 

Speaking of cycling, yesterday I had one of those … interesting encounters that may have ended in some man pain.

Imagine you’re one of those stylish, lean, sporty road cyclists, fresh out on the bike in spring after a winter of indoors training. You sprint up a hill and there in front of you is a somewhat chubby lady on a mountain bike. Her bike’s not bad (for a mountain bike), you realise, clearly has seen some use lately. So either the woman is riding her boyfriend’s bike, or perhaps she does cycle a little more often than on every other sunny Sunday and has invested a few quid. Still, the bike is weighed down with mudguards, the woman is carrying a rucksack with a heavy lock in it, and some extra kilos on herself.

You sprint past, check quickly whether she’s riding an E-mountain bike because she’s not that slow. Nope, no motor, classic hardtail bike. Off you go. You accelerate, because even though a mountain bike is no match for your lightweight roadbike, you’re fit and you want to show it. The road descends slightly, so you go at almost 40 kmh fairly easily. You look over your shoulder. Strangely, the mountain bike woman is still there. Has accelerated, too, a little.

Hah, you think, nice try. You accelerate more. Check if she’s sucking your slipstream. She isn’t. Keeps a bit of distance. But she’s still there. The road levels. Keeping the speed hurts now. You do it anyway. Because if she wants to race, you’re game. After all, she’s riding a mountain bike, and is female, and weighs a lot more than you and everything.

You’re a bit out of breath now. You look over your shoulder again, hoping she’s finally given up. Nope. Still there. Not gaining, but not falling behind, either. And after about two kilometres of sprinting, she’s still there, damn her. Still not gaining (a small blessing), still not riding in your slipstream. The next village is close. You have to slow down at a crossroads, and MTB lady catches up with you. You try not to look like you’re close to collapsing and hope she won’t continue in the same direction as you. Thankfully, she doesn’t.

In fact, she’s glad about not having to keep up with you, too, because her legs feel like they’re about to fall off. But to spare your last bit of manly pride, she only starts grinning when you can’t see her anymore.

I was the nasty MTB lady the other day. I’m absolutely not sorry :D

You and I

Chibs/Reader
Fluff and smut.
Credit to Gif maker/owner.
Based in the song “You and I” by Lady Gaga

It’s been a long time since I came around
Been a long time but I’m back in town
This time I’m not leaving without you

No one will ever truly understand why you left. You will never truly understand yourself. Your gut told you you had to leave so you did. Now as you walked down the familiar sidewalk to downtown charming you felt at peace. True inner peace. You were not leaving this town again. Not without the man you love more than anything.

You taste like whiskey when you kiss me, oh
I’d give anything again to be your baby doll
This time I’m not leaving without you

Back then you couldn’t get used to the lifestyle. The constant runs. The sea of trashy crow eaters constantly hanging over your man like you didn’t exist. It’s been two years and you’ve grown more as a woman. You were here to take back your man and never leave him again. But how would Filip Telford feel when he saw you? You broke his heart when you left. You’d spend your lifetime making it up to him if you had to. Thinking about Chibs made so many warm memories come to mind. You could almost breathe his scent again. Your thoughts intoxicated by the smell of leather and whiskey you remember so well.

It’s now or never. You got back up and walked to your bike. Chibs helped you pick it out when you decided on a whim you wanted one. It used to terrify you but now you couldn’t imagine not riding. You put your helmet on. You had one destination. Teller-Morrow where the Sons of anarchy reside. Where you would get your old man back.

You pulled in and parked your bike to the side. Knowing the sound would stir people. You looked up and spotted him instantly. His hair longer than you remember. He was working on a bike and talking to best friend and coworker Juice Ortiz. You walked up from the side so he wouldn’t see you immediately. Juice spotted you and froze. He panicked with the thought about how Chibs would react to seeing you. He wasn’t the same since you left. He didn’t know if his friend would be excited or more hurt. You begged him with your hands not to say anything. So he went back to working in the bike.

“What does a lady have to do to get some decent bike service around here?!” You say in play disgust.

You saw his body freeze as he recognized the voice immediately. But he didn’t turn around right away. He looked at Juice who excused himself to leave them alone.

“Hello Filip.” you decide to say more normally.

He turned around and you saw the tears forming in his eyes. You weren’t sure if his tears were from the sadness you caused him. Or the happiness of seeing you. Thankfully at this moment. It was the latter. He took a good long look at you. You were more beautiful than he remembered. Your (y/h/c) hair had grown down past your shoulders. Your body had filled out and your curves were intoxicating.

“(Y/N).” he whispered. He was afraid saying your name out loud would make you less real. “Lass, is it really ye?”

“Yes love. It’s me. Can we have lunch? A drink? Catch up? If that’s OK. If your old lady wouldn’t mind of course.”

“I don have an old lady. Not since ya left. I knew I wouldn’t be happy with anyone else. So I didn’t even botha. I only told ma brothers I had moved on. But never truly.”

That stung your heart. But you knew he didn’t mean anything bad by it. He was just being Filip. True and honest.

“Aye. Come on lass. Let’s get a drink at the Clubhouse”

He said, “Sit back down where you belong
In the corner of my bar with your high heels on
Sit back down on the couch where we
Made love the first time and you said to me,”
There’s

(Something), something about this place
(Something), something, ‘bout lonely nights
And my lipstick on your face
Something, something about
My cool Nebraska guy
Yeah, there’s something about
Baby, you and I

You were on your second shot. You felt the alcohol warming your insides. Making you relax more. You were ready to pour your heart out. “Filip… I… I’m sorry for leaving you the way I did. It was childish. And immature. And I love you so much. And there was never anyone else in my life either. I knew I wouldn’t love them like I love you. And I know, I don’t expect you to just take me back or if you even want that.” You rambled and rambled and he just started deep into your (y/e/c) eyes that he missed so much.

It’s been two years since I let you go
I couldn’t listen to a joke or a Rock and Roll
Muscle cars drove a truck right through my heart
On my birthday you sang me “Heart of Gold”
With a guitar humming and a no clothes
This time I’m not leaving without you

“Lass.” he tried to interrupt you but you kept on rambling.

“(Y/n).” he tried again but by this time your calmness you had when you arrived went all out the window. You were anxious and wouldn’t stop talking. He finally had enough and shut you up by planting a soft kiss on your lips.

“Can I speak now lass?” you nodded as you tried to process the shock of the kiss.

“I won’t lie and say I wasn’t praying for ye to return one day. I won’t lie and say you didn’t hurt me. I won’t lie and say I was afraid you’d never come back home. But I understand why you did it. I couldn’t devote myself to ya back then. Things have changed. If you decide to stay…”

This time you shut him up with another deep kiss.

“I don’t expect us to be back to the way we were over night. But I can tell you right now, IF I ever leave Charming again. I won’t leave without you.

He said, “Sit back down where you belong
In the corner of my bar with your high heels on
Sit back down on the couch where we
Made love the first time and you said to me,”
There’s
(There’s something), something about this place
(Something), something, ‘bout lonely nights
And my lipstick on your face
Something, something about
My cool Nebraska guy
Yeah, there’s something about
Baby, you and I

Juice and the guys walked in the club house. He must have told them you were here and they came to make sure you weren’t further destroying their brothers heart. Instead they found you both lip locked at the bar. Jax motioned for everyone to leave again. He wanted you guys to have your privacy.

“Chibby, you still have a room here at the club house?”

“Aye lass”

“Make love to me.” you said. He needed to hear no more. He jumped off his stool and pulled you off of yours. He picked you up and you wrapped your legs around his waist. He carried you away and down the hall to his room.


You and I
You, you and I
You, you and I
You, you and I, I
You and I
You, you and I
Oh yeah, well I’d rather die
Without you and I, I


He took you inside and kicked the door shut behind him. He gently laid you down on the bed. He climbed on top of you and continued to shower you with kisses. He undressed you slowly. He wanted to take his time to enjoy you and your new curves. You were glowing with anticipation for him. He undressed and climbed back over you on the bed. He positioned himself and entered you slowly savoring every sweet second of filling you.


You threw your head back at the feeling. You missed this man more than anything in life. So much so you never let another man touch you since you left. You knew no one would ever touch you like he does.

He continued his slow and passionate pace. You stared into each other’s eyes. Your hips matched his movements. You both moaned in pleasure at each other’s touch. He bent down to kiss you deeply. His tongue licking and sucking at your lips. You held him fast by the back of the neck securing him to your lips. The other hand was on his back nails deep. He moaned into your mouth in pleasure.


You were getting closer and closer to ecstasy. No doubt he was too. Your body’s continued to writhe together. Savoring each other.


Come on! Put your drinks up!

We got a whole lot of money, but we still pay rent
Cause you can’t buy a house in Heaven
There’s only three men that I'mma serve my whole life
It’s my daddy and Nebraska and Jesus Christ
There’s
(Something), Something, something about the chase
(Six whole years)
I’m a New York woman born to run you down
Still want my lipstick all over your face
Something, something about
Just knowing when it’s right
So put your drinks up, for Nebraska
For Nebraska, Nebraska, I love ya

You and I
You, you and I
Baby, I’d rather die
Without you and I, I
You and I
You, you and I
Nebraska, I’d rather die
Without you and I, I

Suddenly you released and drowned in the fire coursing through you. “oh my God baby!” you breathe out.

He let go of himself and collapsed on top of you still inside you with one long groan. You both struggle to regain your breaths. You sat this way for a while before he rolled off of you and pulled you close wrapping his arms around you.

It’s been along time since I came around
Been along time but I’m back in town
And this time I’m not leaving without you

“I love you Fillip Telford.”

“I love you (Y/F/L/N) and I’m never letting you go again.

@thegoodthebadandtheempty @codenamekaraortiz @khyharah @a-daydreamers-stories @anarchyrenegade @im-gay-for-chibbs-juiceyandtiggy @chaosmieu @redwoodog @telford-ortiz-teller @one-charming-life @fortheloveofthesoa @girl-with-no-faith-in-medicine @sarcastic-lunatic @doodlebugwriter @lolsthecat @oz567
CODE NAME VERITY by Elizabeth Wein

a passionate manifesto

by me, an obsessive fangirl

Elevator pitch: 

Lady pilot and lady spy in WWII become BFFs, as told by the lady spy via confession in a Gestapo prison in Nazi-occupied France.

Characters:

Verity

  • lady spy
  • blonde
  • NOT ENGLISH (she’s Scottish and will heck you right up if you forget)
  • possibly related to William Wallace and it shows
  • has a bunch of nicknames bc she is Loved
  • coward
  • lying liar who lies (see: spy)
  • very attached to her orange jumper sweater thing
  • learned German bc it’s pretty
  • scared of heights
  • smokes
  • good at girl code
  • loves her brothers and her bff Maddie


Maddie

  • lady pilot
  • English
  • Jewish
  • loves her bike and her granddad and her plane
  • is really loud when she cries
  • v v scared of gunfire/bombs/things that go boom
  • loves flying - like really really REALLY loves flying
  • good mechanic and handy with a bike
  • hides under an umbrella sometimes
  • loves roses
  • will knock your teeth out if you talk bad about Verity


Jamie

  • Verity’s brother
  • also Scottish (obvs)
  • got shot up (not a spoiler)
  • pilot
  • hot (imo)
  • loves his mama
  • feminist (but 1940s so doesn’t use that label but is def a “I’ll hold your purse; get ‘em, babe” kind of dude)


Haupsturmführer von Linden

  • douchebag Nazi
  • dad
  • likes poetry
  • still a douchebag Nazi


Anna Engel

  • Complicated
  • smokes


Mitraillette

  • French resistance fighter
  • code name means “submachine gun”
  • teen girl/young lady
  • tough as crap
  • angel

There are more, but you should just meet them.

Why you should read this book, the love of my heart, light of my life:

1. Ladies being awesome. There are some dudes, but this book is ladies ladies ladies all the time, and legit historical ladies at that! Spy ladies doing real historical spy lady things (through the SOE!) and pilot ladies flying real historical pilot lady planes (through the WAAF!) and French Resistance ladies wreckin’ Nazi crap! Alllllllll the ladies.

2. Besties being besties. There is no small amount of in-fandom debate about the status of Verity and Maddie’s relationship, and that’s okay, because no matter where you land, the foundation is the fact that they will heck up the world for each other. No cattiness, no letting a dude get in the way– they are ride or die in the best way.

3. The bad guys are bad and the good guys are good but everyone is human. No Nazi apologia or redemption, and the Allies are definitely doing the right thing. But the bad guys are humans with families, which is what makes their deliberate choices to do evil things to other humans even more horrifying. (No mustache twirling here, just a rampant and deliberate disregard for other people.) And the good guys don’t always make the right choices, because they’re also humans and are just doing the best they can.

4. Inhuman plotting skillz. Legit, I made two different people read this book, and they gave the same reaction: “How could a HUMAN have plotted this??? Too twisty, too intricate, parts moving like, wow, HOW?????” Y’know the conspiracy theorist guy with the corkboard and all the strings? I picture the author like that plotting this book.

4.5 Really cool narrative structure. Like, really, really cool. But that’s a subpoint of the above.

5. You will cry. This is guaranteed. You will cry the first time you read it–level from misty eyes to howling in a corner depends on how stone cold dead you are inside. You will gut sob the second time you read it. This is also guaranteed. Happy cry and sad cry and “I love these characters” cry, all the cry.

6. Beauuuuuuuuutiful writing. I put this last bc it’s often what people say when there’s nothing else good to say about a book, but obvs there is. I would give examples but the very best ones are spoilery. Just trust me that this is prose you would happily sink into and drown in.

Bonus: The author is a legit sweetheart of a human being.

————————————————————————————

Okay, I think that’s it. @throwaninkpot this is for you.