lady fainting

The Joker x Reader- “How To Be a Dad”

The Joker has never been around a pregnant woman before. Actually… just once, during a robbery and the poor thing fainted even if he didn’t do anything to her. You thought J would be bored with the whole process, but all he says is that he wants to see her NOW. Well, it doesn’t really work that way and your boyfriend is not famous for his patience.

– At night, J likes to rest his head on your legs, face turned towards your huge bump.

“When is she coming out? I wanna see her!”

“Soon J, be patient.”

Joker and patience don’t go in the same sentence.

“But I wanna see her now, I’ve been waiting forever!”

“It’s happening soon enough.”

“Hey, Doll, do you think she already looks like me?”

“No, not yet.”

He pouts.

“Do you think she knows I’m her dad?”

“No, not yet J.”

He frowns.

“Do you think she has green hair?” he snickers, walking his fingers on your tummy.

“No, baby, no toxic green locks.”

“Do you think she has bright red hair?”

“No, I dye mine; if anything, Emma will have dark blonde hair, my natural color. Or maybe she’ll have your natural color. Is it brown or…?”
“No, it’s a dark blonde too,” the Joker blurs out and after a few seconds he gasps. “Did you just…did you just make me tell you another one of my secrets, woman?!”

“Nooo, I didn’t make you do anything,” you smirk, trying not to laugh, all innocent and sweet.

“You’re sneaky, Y/N, stop it!” he pinches your thigh, aggravated you took advantage of him being smitten with the unborn baby. “Oh my God!” J shouts when he notices the small hand moving right under your skin. “There she is!” he excitedly touches her, sensing the shift. “This is so cool- cooler than being chased by Batsy,” he admits, huffing. “Jerk!” The Joker mutters, then pays attention to you again. “Does it hurt when she does that?” (he asks this very often and the reply never changes).

“No, handsome, she’s just wiggling around. Anxious to get out, I’m sure. Have you ever been around a pregnant person before?”

“Once, during a bank robbery. I decided to do it in plain daylight and this lady was there. She fainted.”

“What did you do to her?” You try to reach him but can’t bend at all.

 “Nothing, she just passed out when me and my men took over the place. There she is again!” he grins and one of Emma’s tiny feet stretches out pretty high this time. “Do you know what this reminds me of?”

“No, but please do share,” you sigh, curious to hear about another crazy idea for sure.

Aliens movie! You think she might just burst out of there?” J pokes your bump, then caresses the skin to feel his daughter once more.

You start giggling, amused:

“I think we’re good on that one. She’ll come out the right way, no worries.”

“Oh, I forgot I got her something,” The Joker suddenly realizes and jumps out of bed.

“More stuff?!” you tease since the unborn has a room full of baby things.

“This is better than any of them,” J fumbles inside the closet and finally brings over the shiny diamond tiara he places on top of your tummy. “Here, a Princess should have one,” he excitedly brags and goes back to his favorite spot on your legs.

“Where did you get it from?!”
“Gotham’s Bank vault,” he winks, proud of his achievement and scoots closer so you can touch him since you look so pathetic when you keep on trying and fail.

“And I was thinking you bought it, baby,” you wrap a strand of his hair around your chubbier than usual finger.

“I did, just forgot to pay,” he mocks, making sure the sparkly crown stays in place.

And you both have a good laugh about it - your boyfriend can be so funny sometimes, even if he thinks he’s funny all the time.

The Joker closes his blue eyes and you brush your index finger against his long eyelashes.

“What is it, Pumpkin?” he yawns, opening one eye.

“Could you please bring me a sliced cucumber and chocolate syrup?”

“Yuck, I don’t know how you can eat that disgusting combo,” he shivers, grossed out by your choices in food lately.

“I’m craving a bunch of weird snacks, I can’t help it. Remember last month when all I wanted was apple sauce with radishes and cinnamon powder?”

“Ewww, yes. I guess this is an upgrade, Doll. Can’t you go in the kitchen and make your own plate? I’m tired.”

You point out towards your diamond decorated bump:

“I can’t move or this will fall.”

“Uggghhh, fine, I’ll be back,” J agrees, dragging his feet on the carpet because he’s not in the mood for too much except staring at your belly to see Emma move.

– He feels nauseated watching you munch on your repulsive late dinner. J would love to fall asleep but the damn cucumbers are so crunchy when you bite out of them.

“Are you done, Y/N? I wanna sleep.”

“Done, the last one!” you shove the slice in your mouth and lean over him to place the bowl on the nightstand.

“Jesus, Princess, how much do you weight??!!” J puffs under your heaviness, over exaggerating, of course.

You’re a delicate little flower that doesn’t need negative comments.

“Whatever!!!! This is your fault!” you give him a sassy gaze, pinning him under you for a few more seconds this way he learns his lesson.

He just can’t talk like that to delicate little flowers.

“ I didn’t do anything,” The Joker pulls you in for a kiss, purring. “Just had some fun with my girl, the rest… you’re responsible for!” he taunts, delighted you can’t do too much but squirm on top of him.

“You’re so…so…so,” you stutter, outraged, not being able to find the word.

“What is this?!” he puckers his lips, intrigued when he feels it.

You try to look down in between the two of you without success.

“I think my water broke!”

– “Pumpkin, are you gonna die?” he growls, checking you out worried sick; he’s been asking this every 5 minutes in the last six hours.

“For God’s sake, I’m not dying !! I’m giving birth!”, you shriek through your clenched teeth, breathing in and out in a frenzy.

“Are you sure?” J triple checks furthermore.

“Yes, I’m sure,” and you squeeze his hand so hard you hear a few bones crack.

“Auuuchhh, don’t break my hand!” he whines, taking a step back.

“Take your rings off!” you urge him, panting. “It makes it worse.”

He hurries and does it, dumping them in a cup on the table.

“Give me your hand!” you shout, feeling the strong contractions hit your body with paralyzing strength.

“Ummm, don’t break it, OK?” he hesitantly gives it back, hoping for the best.

Who knew such a delicate little flower as yourself can have so much vigor?!

“Where’s my daughter?” The Joker stretches his free arm to lift the sheet covering you from the waist down and regrets it in the next moment. He’s seen a lot of messed up shit in his life but this takes the cake.

“Pretty soon, Mister J,” the doctor replies, wishing the Clown Prince of Crime would just behave and wait.

“ Kitten,” J gulps, even more tense. “Are you sure you’re not dying?”

“I’m sure, stop asking!” you groan, resting your head on the pillow. “This is your fault!” you blame J again, annoyed and in so much pain you are seeing red spots.

Your boyfriend completely ignores your outburst, tilting over to peck your forehead.

“Hurry up, Princess, I need to see her!”

“So sorry about the inconvenience!!!” you scream, muttering something else under your labored breathing. It wasn’t a nice statement.

“Yuck, Doll, you’re all sweaty!” he complains, wiping his lips.

Huh??! ! Delicate little flowers don’t get sweaty!!!!

“J, you’re not helping!” you state the obvious and push again, exhausted and anxious in the same time. You crush his fingers so hard J thinks his arm fell off. He wants to object but the doctor finally articulates the words he’s been craving to hear for so long:

“Alright, here she is!” and the crying starts after a few seconds.

– First time The Joker held Emma, he forgot to breathe.

“She looks like a little doll,” he whispers, mesmerized on how cute she is. “How long do you think it will take before she resembles us?”

“A while,” you take a deep breath and blink slowly, so jaded you can hardly speak.

The little one fusses and he almost panics, not knowing what to do but she calms down when he gently rocks her.

“I think…I think she smiled at me!” J exclaims. You doubt it, but can’t spoil his joy:

Delicate little flowers don’t do such things to a man they love.

“That’s because she knows you’re her dad,” you utter, making it even better for the new father.

“Really?” he kisses her cheek with an almost childish curiosity. ”You think so Y/N?”

“Yeah, now that you have her in your arms, she knows,” you rub your face, fighting to stay awake.

The Joker feels so many emotions at once and has no clue how to handle any of them. He’s not the one to analyze himself but damn, it’s just so overwhelming his chest hurts. Can’t be a heart attack, he’s too young.  

He paces alongside your bed, careful not to wake the newborn.

“Hey, Pumpkin, when can we have sex again?” he bites his lip, eager to go back to fun stuff.

“It’s gonna be a while, baby. Not too much, ok?” you quickly add when notice how disappointed he is. “ I just basically squeezed a watermelon through a prune so give me some credit. Be patient, please.”

Joker and patience don’t go in the same sentence.

“Just hurry up and get better, I have needs!” he sulks but winks when he realizes you don’t look too excited at his yapping.

Ahhh, such a charmer.

But you can’t rush this process on delicate little flowers.

Even the King of Gotham needs to understand it.


Also read: MASTERLIST

http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/153664676321/joker-x-reader-masterlist

Playing with Fire- Part 1

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader

Summary: Demons weren’t supposed to fall in love. So why did you feel so strongly towards him, a demon hunter?

Genre: Demon/Assassin AU, angst

Word Count: 1937

Parts: 1 // 2 // ?

A/N: This was originally supposed to be a one-shot prologue thing, but I decided to split it up into parts because why not~


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ryeregular  asked:

Prompt: the kids meet those meanies that made fun of Sportacus and robbie cause why not (Also I accidentally sent this ask to different blog/wrong blog xD my best and first fail on tumblr, 2017)

Link to the first ficlet (Protective Sportacus)

Link to the second ficlet (Protective Robbie)

Another anon sent in a similar prompt:

Since you have protective Sportacus and protective Robbie. What about protective kids!! Kids literally be scary if they want to and i’d Love to see it ;)

Y’all really like these boys being protected, huh? Fine by me. I love the lazy husbands.

Thanks again to @rottensocksandfluff who let me use them as a sounding board to figure out how to do this chronologically. Love yah <3

“Sportahusband!”

Sportacus, who had been in the middle of series of flips, stopped and turned around when he heard Robbie’s voice. Without warning, Robbie slammed into him, capturing Sportacus in a tight hug. He buried his face in the crook of Sportacus’ neck. Sportacus automatically wrapped his arm around him. He had a distressing guess as to what had caused this embrace.

“Did you, by an chance, run into three jerks just now?” Sportacus asked, rubbing a hand up and down Robbie’s back.

“I love you,” was Robbie’s response, which Sportacus took for a ‘yes’, “I love you and your accent.” 

His heart leapt at the thought of Robbie defending him from those strangers and he kissed the side of Robbie’s head, “I love you and all your tics. Every one.” He sighed, “I’m sorry you had to face them.”

Robbie chuckled, “I’m sorry I had to miss you in action. Apparently you were terrifying.” He finally picked his head up, keeping his arms around Sportacus’ middle. His eyes looked a little watery to Sportacus. He wanted to address that but Robbie ducked his head to kiss him. Sportacus was all to happy for the distraction.

There was a sudden buzzing noise, like an 80 pound bee, and they broke apart, looking around. From Pixel’s house, a large round drone shot out of the window. Robbie jumped into Sportacus’ arms with a yelp.

The drone buzzed past the two of them and flew off. Seconds later, five children came running out of Pixel’s house, watching the drone and cheering. Pixel was holding a controller and had that same look on his face whenever he was paying more attention to what he was seeing in his glasses than to the world around him.

“What’s going on?” Sportacus said, placing Robbie gently back on his feet.

“Me and Ziggy saw those bullies before when they were being mean to Robbie,” Stephanie explained, “Then you made them leave and we went to tell the others.”

Trixie interrupted “Pixel followed them with one of his drones to make sure they really left Lazytown.”

“And he saw Robbie fighting them off too,” Stingy said.

“And now he’s sending a BIGGER drone!” Ziggy said, “To make extra sure they leave Lazytown! Forever!”

Sportacus knew he probably shouldn’t encourage the harassment of strangers but he couldn’t help but smile at them all. He looked up at Robbie to find him struggling to keep a straight face.

Robbie bit his lip before asking, “For how long did you say?”

“FOREVER!” The kids chorused. Robbie burst out laughing.

Pixel waved a hand to get everyone’s attention, “They just saw my drone! Wow, they’re really running fast now.”

The rest of the kids gathered around Pixel, asking for updates and giggling at Pixel’s descriptions. Sportacus took hold of Robbie’s right hand with his left, lacing their fingers together. Robbie lifted their joint hands and kissed Sportacus’ ring. 

A sudden loud boom broke the moment.

“Pixel, we want them out of town, not dead!”

“That was just a firecracker! Sorry, I hit the wrong button. I think that lady fainted.”

Exo reaction to you suddenly fainting in public.

nemogirl02 said:Exo react to you suddenly faint. Like you’re out in public or something and BAM! You pass out

FOLLOW, LIKE, RE-BLOG, REQUEST, VISIT PAGE 4 OTHER GROUP REACTIONS. SORRY THIS WASN’T MY BEST REACTION  (I hate that I couldn't find any great gifs)

Suho: He just thought you were playing around. “What..ha ha very funny, get up y/n”

Originally posted by suhomysuho

D.O: O H F U C K I N G S H I T! He was just having a conversation with you then bam! Every little piece of sense he had just left his brain.

Originally posted by bbaekhyunnieee

Lay: You: *Faints* Him: “OH MY GOD BABE-” Bystanders: “Did you just see that man attack that woman? HOW FUCKING DARE YOU!” Him: wtf did I do..

Originally posted by tellyouwhatislove

Baekhyun: He just froze, you fainted right there all of sudden. He didn’t even know until he turned around, to see someone helping you up. You fell so quietly, he wasn’t aware of it.

Originally posted by grinding-on-baek

Xiumin: You complained that you were burning up, he didn’t feel hot, even though it wasn’t the best pleasing weather outside. You ended up fainting from being too hot and walking too much. After he got you up to recover and cooled you down with some cold water, he was all worked up over the incident, burning up into flames.

Originally posted by theseoks

Kai: *In this reaction he doesn’t know you* You wake up to surroundings that aren’t familiar with you, and a weird man standing in front of your eyes. You: “Who the hell are you?…Where am I?” Him: “You fainted, my lady” You: “DID YOU KIS-” Him: “No….chill, I just put a wet towel over your head”

Originally posted by kairamelo

Chen: You two aren’t really the close of friends. You awake to find him calmly watching TV, while laying his head on your shoulder. He laid there till you woke  You: “Ew, get off of me” Him: “Well hello to you too” Both: *Laugh*

Originally posted by everybodyloveschen

Chanyeol: “Um……babe……ARE YOU FUCKING OK OH MY GOD”

Originally posted by mickyawesomnessninja

Sehun: He wasn’t sure how to act, the way you fell was very dramatic. Which that completely threw him off right there, he wasn’t aware that you actually fainted. 

Originally posted by verymanlyluhan00

FOLLOW,LIKE,RE-BLOG,REQUEST..SORRY THIS WASN’T MY BEST (I hate that I couldn’t find any great gifs)REACTION. VISIT TAGS FOR OTHER GROUP REACTIONS ON MY PAGE

350+ Barisi Drabble: Faint - Soulmate AU

For @me-ladie

Title: Faint

Fandom: Law and Order SVU
Pairing: Barisi, Dominick “Sonny” Carisi Jr./Rafael Barba
Setting: Soulmate AU

Author’s Notes: the first soulmate AU I read was a Barisi fic so don’t know this trope very well. So hope this doesn’t suck. Also, barely proof-read. 

Word Count: Over 500, because apparently I cannot be brief

In retrospect Sonny should have told Liv his soulmate mark was acting up during his first week at SVU. But he liked the team and their ADA, so he didn’t want to risk it by disclosing that someone in greater Manhattan area was his soulmate.   

The small hickey-like mark on his neck was easy enough to hide. His sisters had taught him how to properly conceal it with makeup when it first appeared three years ago. He wore coats with high collars and scarves whenever possible.   

He knew his soulmate must be someone he worked with, maybe a uni or a law clerk. For a while Sonny suspected Carmen, Barba’s assistant, since his mark burned in the law offices of the ADAs.

The mark could be ignored but the likelihood that either Sonny or his soulmate would become ill from denying the bond would increase over time. 

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Ah so it begins. A fire started with the very first firework and panic ensued as expected.  Everyone was “waaaa, aaahhh!!” Oh Lord Jesus, its a fire!

Unauthorized kid somehow got burned, peed on himself and Bear fainted in said pee. The paparazzi and bartenders ran to the beach to panic along with the rest. Because, it’s what they do.  And NOBODY had better attempt to put these fires out. If not they will be very very sorry. signed: the sim gott

Baby Tyler walked around in a daze very close to the flames mind you. The paparazzi lady (aka paps lady) faints in the background. But look at all those fireworks yet to be set off. Just saying.

La Lettre or L'Évanouissement - en grisaille. Louis-Léopold Boilly (French, 1761-1845). Oil on canvas.

In a bourgeois interior, an elegantly dressed lady has fainted after reading a letter. In her distress, her body strikes an elegant arabesque pose, incidentally offering a glimpse of her risqué cleavage. An alarmed gentleman, presumably her husband, comes to the disheveled beauty’s rescue. The content of the letter remains a mystery, inviting the viewer to complete this titillating story.

6

Brian d’Arcy James + Kisses

@haisai-haitai spots a troubled soul…

“Hsss–” Erika reached up to her neck, wrapping her fingers around her throat and rubbing it from one side to the other. There was that feeling again; like something was tugging her, forcing her backwards to some unnamed place. She felt a black hole behind her as if, should she give in to this sensation, it would tug her into its abyss and lock her away forever.

But every time she turned her head to see it the sensation, the black hole, and every reminder of it vanished.

“… This is totally not fun,” Erika whined to herself, walking closer to the window. She lifted a hand up towards the sunlight and inspected it closely. Well, it looked normal enough! She half expected it to be see-through, like a thin paper fan against a sky blue backdrop.

Was she dead? Erika had been trying to answer that for days. The last thing she remembered before the madness was a fire, a fight, a crushing blow to the chest. When she awoke the guys were missing, the wounds were gone, and she was laying in the middle of the street.

Most people seemed to be ignoring her. Those that saw her seemed to be surprised that she was there. It was altogether strange, but not as strange as what had happened when she tried to return home.

It would not let her inside. Like some kind of strange barrier prevented her from returning to her apartment, she could not get farther than the second floor landing before being forced back down.

So she had been staying here, in this abandoned warehouse on the outskirts of the city where others rarely tread.

It was better that way. The first day after she awoke Erika attempted to explore the city, look for answers and find the boys. She felt a discomfort all around her. On the second day Erika roamed the streets, trying to live normally… and on the third day it became abundantly clear that her unnatural presence served as a torment to others. People complained of headaches, horrible visions; ladies fainted on the sidewalk, a nearby car crashed into a street sign…

Was it only a coincidence? But Erika didn’t believe in coincidences, after all.

Was she causing all of this?

“If I was going to be in a horror manga, I thought it’d be a cooler one.”

anonymous asked:

umm ladynoir 38 if you want?

38. “You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”

First time writing for this fandom, hopefully I got their characters right~


If not for her mask, sweat would be dripping into her eyes. As it was, Ladybug was feeling unbearably hot, her mind floating away as she gasped for breath and fought against both fever and akuma. The fight was taking longer than it ought to, and she was running out of time in her transformation. Chat was doing the brunt of the work, and even as she tried to straighten her mind, he was tearing across the room, claws dragging destruction in circles around their foe.

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