labor talks

[ image description: A screen shot of a post that reads “Don’t cross oceans for people who wouldn’t cross a puddle for you.” Someone has crossed this out with a big grey X and underneath added “No, do it. Do cross oceans for people. Love people, all people. No conditions attached, no wondering whether or not they’re worthy. Cross oceans, climb mountains. Life and love isn’t about what you gain, it’s about what you give.” End of descripton ]

I hate this post, I hate it so much. And let me tell you why.

At first it seems like a pretty good post, right? You should love people and do things for them because you want to or because it’s nice, or just because you love them, not because you expect something in return. Yeah. We learn that as kids. But listen. Listen to me. It is not that simple. Yes you should do nice things for people. Carry in your grandmother’s grocerys even if she forgets to say thank you. Sure. But you should never, never, pour yourself into someone who does not give back to you.

Doing everything for someone who gives you nothing in return is not love.

A friend of mine worded it really well “The point of the original post was to emphasise that your own mental/physical health is more important than someone’s selfish needs.” It’s not romantic to run yourself into the ground for someone who can’t even be bothered to care about you. And not only is it not romantic, it’s unhealthy.

I have, on more than one occasion, “crossed oceans” for people who I do believe loved me, but who didn’t even come close to crossing them for me. And do you know what I got out of that? The first one I lost 10 pounds because I was so miserable I could barely eat and I was throwing up what I did eat. And I was still doing whatever I could to be with them, and make them happy, even though they didn’t seem to be willing to put any work in themself. Why bother, I was always there. The second one I ran my own mental health so thin that that literally could not do anything for him, all I could do is sit in the bathtub and think about how I coudln’t feel anything. But I still refused to turn my phone off and ignore his messages. I still made myself avaible to him because he “needed me.”

There was nothing romantic about either of those situations (note: only one was a romantic relationship but the idea of giving and giving and giving when you’re gettin nothing back is romanticized whether it’s in a romantic or platonic relationship.) There was nothing beautiful or selfless about it. It was miserable. I was miserable. I can remember one of my friends telling me he missed me because all I could talk about was the person I had allowed to become my whole life.

And in the end, both of them stopped talking to me.

Don’t believe anyone when they say the second part of that post. It’s bullshit and I’m really tired of seeing it romanticized. It tells people (especailly young girls) that this is an okay way for a relationship to be, that this is what they should be doing. 

There is nothing selfish about demanding that your emotional labour be reciprocated. That’s what makes a relationship (romantic, platonic, or otherwise) healthy. That’s what love is. Both people giving. Both people supportin each other. Not one person giving until they have nothing left for themself. 

my ancestors didn’t die & suffer in labor camps for their history to be forgotten and erased. my people didn’t just recently fight so hard for their freedom for their history to be forgotten. we didn’t have anyone but our brothers fighting on our side but still we fought for our freedom and won. we’re still fighting everyday. don’t forget that.

anonymous asked:

I really love your blog~ especially that what if Saru ran away and became homeless now I keep thinking what if Mikoto and the rest raise him kinda like those if Saru was adopted into Reisei's family.

Poor little homeless Fushimi being raised by Homra trio is definitely intriguing. Kusanagi would probably be even more of a mom than he already is. I imagine at first he’s kinda like okay one, we can’t just adopt a random kid we found sleeping in our doorway he’s not a puppy (as Totsuka dries off Fushimi’s hair and looks up at Kusanagi hopefully like “Can we keep him?”), two, since when are we in the business of raising children (oh Kusanagi if only you knew) and three, I’m not letting the kid who must belong to someone stay in my bar and get us all arrested for kidnapping. Totsuka assures Kusanagi that it’ll be fine and asks little Saruhiko if he has parents to go back to. Fushimi doesn’t really want to answer and Kusanagi kinda sighs and figures well, they know the kid’s name so they can just do some asking around and find where he belongs and then they can send him home. Fushimi suddenly gets this absolutely terrified look and Mikoto stands up and just walks over to him, staring at him for a long moment before asking bluntly if Fushimi wants to go back home. Fushimi fidgets a little because Mikoto’s stare is scaring him a bit but he manages to shake his head no. Kusanagi sighs again because no, seriously guys this is kidnapping but Mikoto just says that okay, the kid’s staying here. Kusanagi sighs but agrees to it in the end, Totsuka is totally happy about the new puppy.

And once more Fushimi is raised all loved and doted on. Totsuka probably wants to play with him and talk to him all the time, like ooh new toy, but Fushimi’s all quiet and nervous so it’s hard to get him to come out of his shell. Then one day Kusanagi’s trying to balance his books a little for the bar and there’s a discrepency that he can’t figure out. Fushimi comes wandering out from upstairs, Kusanagi tells Fushimi if he’s hungry he can help himself and Totsuka and Mikoto will be back soon, Kusanagi’s just a bit busy right now. Fushimi sits himself down on a stool near Kusanagi staring at all the papers and then he suddenly reaches out and points to where Kusanagi’s math is off. Kusanagi doesn’t quite believe him at first because come on, it’s a little kid and this is a lot of math but then of course it turns out Fushimi was right and Kusanagi realizes that Fushimi’s a lot smarter than he’s been letting on. From that point he starts to realize just how much potential Fushimi has and starts letting him help out with a lot of stuff around the bar and Fushimi starts getting a little more open about things because he likes having a job to do, but on the bad side he gets a little less shy and a little more willing to call Totsuka annoying to his face (Totsuka finds this adorable) and he’s also still kinda jumpy around Mikoto and can’t really explain why.

u ever have that angry annoyed depression like someone breathes and ur like shut up!!!! who asked you!!! someone brought up the idea of doing [x chore] at tonight’s gsa meeting and i spent a good fifteen minutes being pissed off that id have to extend Physical And Emotional Labor talking to these mogai dorks while we pack shit in boxes. im tired yall.

I have a current Doula client who is coping with early labor. Every time a client goes through this stage I am hit yet again with the feeling that everyone is totally unprepared for what labor is truly like.

If I had one thing that I’d want any person pregnant or wanting to get pregnant it would be this: labor is not as quick as our media would have you believe. I’ve been to quite a few labors and have talked with many other doulas who have been working for years and what the majority of us have seen is that early labor takes days. This is technically called Prodromal Labor also called “false labor” There ain’t nothing false about it. This is like a warm up and you get real contractions that come and go. It’s sometimes really uncomfortable and the worst part about it is as soon as you start you’re like “okay cool, baby is about to come” Even if you’ve been told “early labor can take some time and you shouldn’t go to the doctor until you’re farther along” you’re still thinking “okay this will be a few hours, maybe I’ll go into active labor tonight.” Then at night it’s usually worse and you think “okay it’s time to go!” Then you get there and your cervix hasn’t even dilated one inch or is only two inches dilated. Then you think your body is doing something wrong, you go home and cry. The number one reason I’ve seen clients get an epidural is because they are so tired from spending all their energy on early labor that they just need a rest.

So, when you start getting contractions. Ignore them. Be active and do whatever you can do to distract yourself. If your partner is high-strung you don’t even have to tell them yet. Be social, play games, go for a walk, do whatever you can to not think about it. You can have everything ready to go and then put it in the car or closet where you can’t see it. Don’t look at clocks. Just go on like you’re not in labor for as long as you can. When it’s night time follow all the good rules to getting sleep and try to rest as much as possible. Then get up and do it all again the next day. Repeat, maybe slowing down so you don’t push yourself too hard (ahem and get a doula who can show you how to cope with discomfort). When it gets to the point you feel you need to go to the doctor you do that but don’t expect anything. You may be told to go home, you may have someone suggest starting an induction (which less likely to work well if done before you’re at 6 cm, but totally your choice). Don’t feel discouraged. Your body is working hard.

D-Day in NYC

120th day of the lockout

According to Stern: “no guarantees we’re going to get a deal done Friday, but we’re going to give it one heck of a shot…” So a 82 game season might still be possible.

But really though, a 50/50 BRI split ain’t that bad. The 2.5% that the NBPA is arguing over is approximately 100 mill, but they’re gonna lose wayy more if they cut games..think, people.

Nevertheless, FINGERS CROSSED!



Watch on bpopeizdope.tumblr.com

Bryant Gumbel Calls NBA Commissioner David Stern “Modern Plantation Overseer” in Commentary. Check it out 

Arc V spoilers Are here! Thanks to Master Ghost on the Neo Ark Cradle Forums!

Episode 73: The Losers Crawling Under the Ground
13th September 2015
Gallager appears before Gongenzaka and the rest of the Friendship Cup losers who are sent to the underground labor camp. He begins talking about the rules of the underground, as well as how to get back up. Meanwhile, Yuya hears about Reiji and Reira’s thoughts from Tsukikage, who escaped from the underground.
Script: Kamishiro Tsutomu/Animation Director: Masuda Toshihiko

Episode 74: Mask of the Clown
20th September 2015
The last match for the first round of the Friendship Cup is between Kurosaki and Dennis, both Lancers. Against Kurosaki who suspects his identity, Dennis plays in his usual Entertainment style. However, when Kurosaki forces him into a corner, Dennis suddenly summons a new monster that surprises everyone!
Script: Tamura Ryou/Animation Director: Lee Sung-Jin, Choe Byeong Hui

Episode 75: Curse of the Resistors
27th September 2015
Dennis revealed his true identity in front of everyone. The other members of Lancers could not believe their eyes at such a revelation. Kurosaki’s wrath and hate reaches a zenith. While witnessing Dennis and Kurosaki’s duel unfolding, the Yuuto within Yuya starts to respond.
Script: Tamura Ryou/Animation Director: Kawamura Yuya

Episode 76: King’s Gambit
4th October 2015
Script: Kamishiro Tsutomu/Animation Director: Iguchi Chuuichi

Quote:
Episode 76’s Summary:
The City Council and Security finally clash together over the issue of whether to take over the custody of Dennis or not. Although the City Council manages to seal away Security’s powers, its leader Roger announces a new plan called “King’s Gambit”. On the other hand, “that teenage boy” appears before Dennis, who is injured thanks to the duel.

Yu-Gi-Oh! Arc-V 73-76 Episode Summaries


Episode 73: The Losers Crawling Under the Ground
13th September 2015
Gallager appears before Gongenzaka and the rest of the Friendship Cup losers who are sent to the underground labor camp. He begins talking about the rules of the underground, as well as how to get back up. Meanwhile, Yuya hears about Reiji and Reira’s thoughts from Tsukikage, who escaped from the underground.
Script: Kamishiro Tsutomu/Animation Director: Masuda Toshihiko

Episode 74: Mask of the Clown
20th September 2015
The last match for the first round of the Friendship Cup is between Kurosaki and Dennis, both Lancers. Against Kurosaki who suspects his identity, Dennis plays in his usual Entertainment style. However, when Kurosaki forces him into a corner, Dennis suddenly summons a new monster that surprises everyone!
Script: Tamura Ryou/Animation Director: Lee Sung-Jin, Choe Byeong Hui

Episode 75: Curse of the Resistors
27th September 2015
Dennis revealed his true identity in front of everyone. The other members of Lancers could not believe their eyes at such a revelation. Kurosaki’s wrath and hate reaches a zenith. While witnessing Dennis and Kurosaki’s duel unfolding, the Yuuto within Yuya starts to respond.
Script: Tamura Ryou/Animation Director: Kawamura Yuya

Episode 76: King’s Gambit
4th October 2015

The City Council and Security finally clash together over the issue of whether to protect Dennis’ identity or not. Although the City Council manages to seal away Security’s powers, its leader Roger announces a new plan called “King’s Gambit”. On the other hand, “that teenage boy” appears before Dennis, who is injured thanks to the duel

Source: NeoArkCradle