l got bored

repressed crushes 

  • aight so who’s willing to bet that if genji still has hair he dyes it neon fucking green 
  • one night zenyatta just just goes to see genji because no one’s seen him all day and he just finds him with his head covered in tinfoil
  • zenyatta’s really confused for a minute before he remembers that some humans think tinfoil keeps aliens away
  • genji, meanwhile, still hasn’t said anything
  • zenyatta’s just “are you attempting to ward off the aliens?” 
  • genji looks appropriately alarmed for a minute before he just starts laughing
  • “something like that”
  • the next day genji’s hair is just neon green
  • hanzo smiles a little bit and even if he’ll never admit it he has to stop himself from reaching out and ruffling it
  • his hair gets caught in his visor and it matches and it’s hilarious 
  • MEANWHILE zenyatta thinks this is perfectly normal and one day he just paints his head green because of course that’s a natural hair color 
  • he goes to talk to genji and of course he’s totally chill because this is normal and genji just fucking wheezes 
  • zenyatta’s a little worried he’s going to overheat 
  • they let him float around like that for four fucking days 
  • in short they’re all assholes except zenyatta 
  • he just wanted hair guys

give me plots based on cheesy sitcoms (there could be so many possibilities within each show and each character’s back-story and relationship with others lbr)

2 broke girls ↠ a spoiled billionaire’s daughter is shunned and penniless after her father goes to jail over a ponzi scheme, and ends up stumbling into the life of a young working-class woman who has been poor her whole life and still struggles to get by on a monthly basis; yet, despite being emotionally closed off and using sarcasm as a constant defense mechanism, she has a dream to open her own business – a cupcake store. the formerly rich girl moves in with her new friend and must adjust to living a life like her’s, working in a diner and barely scraping by on a monthly basis despite their combined pay cheques. 

baby daddy ↠ a feckless, promiscuous young man working as a bartender, living and loving the single life in new york city has a three-month-old baby girl left at his apartment door by a girl who was only a brief fling to him. unable to cope and wanting to follow her dream of becoming an actress, the girl leaves him with the baby and the adoption papers, but he never signs them, choosing to raise his daughter as a single father. with the help of his (male) roommates – best (male) friend, and sports star older brother – plus his childhood (female) best  friend now living in the city as a lawyer and his recently divorced mother, he begins to make a new life for himself and his child. complications follow when his childhood best friend is revealed to have been in love with him for years, yet his brother has also secretly been in love with her for years also, and the mother returns to the picture and wants to become a family.

the big bang theory ↠ a socially awkward (but incredibly smart and successful) physicist finds himself living next door to a wannabe actress – she’s beautiful, sexy, sweet-natured (despite her short temper), and definitely akin to a popular, confident girl that he never would’ve went for in high school. she becomes an unlikely friend of his and the rest of his group, defined as “nerds” and “geeks” their whole life, never really having a voice. the pair eventually begin a complex on-again/off-again relationship as their two opposite personalities appear drawn to each other over and over again.

the big c ↠ a mother is diagnosed with terminal cancer and realises that she has spent her entire life never really “living” or having the experiences she wanted to. she hides the diagnosis from her family at first, and begins making reckless choices, such as spending ridiculous amounts of money, having an affair, and kicking her layabout husband out of the house. at first, he engages in a sexual relationship with someone new despite wanting to repair his marriage – but, upon learning of each other’s affairs, the husband and wife forgive each other. learning of her cancer, he moves back into the house and becomes the loving, attentive, go-getting husband she’s always wanted. she branches out and tries to achieve an undocumented bucket-list of things before she dies, but they often go pear-shaped. in trying to make sure her son is prepared for the future, she causes him to become more distant. while repairing her marriage, her husband becomes addicted to cocaine. she attempts to reconnect with her estranged, homeless-by-choice brother who suffers bipolar disorder and breaks down upon hearing of his sister’s cancer. she attempts to befriend a grumpy, elderly neighbour who lost her husband to cancer many years ago, and ultimately the neighbour commits suicide. as the cancer progresses, the woman tries a radical treatment to try and cure it.

franklin & bash ↠ two longtime best friends – successful attorneys and not the least bit conventional. somehow, their cockiness and streetwise attitudes have helped them climb the law firm ladder together. often getting themselves into sticky situations with cases, the pair (almost) always manage to stay afloat and scrape a win after previously thinking they were in over their heads.

friends ↠ a former popular high school cheerleader (muse a) who still lives off her rich parents’ wealth even after college runs out on her wedding, seeking refuge at the home of her childhood best friend (muse b) – a formerly unpopular high school target for bullies. the woman stops using her parents’ money and begins trying to find her way in life, just like her new group of friends. muse b is a neurotic “clean-freak” who is striving to become a successful chef and find true love so she can start a family, but fails time and time again. muse b’s older brother (muse c) is a recent divorcee with a baby on the way, and bonds with muse a, later revealing he was in love with her throughout high school and his feelings are still there now that she’s returned to his life. they begin an on-again/off-again relationship and eventually conceive a child while they’re not dating, attempting to raise the baby as two single people. muse c’s college best friend (muse d) is an emotionally closed-off joker in a dead-end job, who struggles to commit to a relationship, while his roommate (muse e) is a promiscuous womaniser and a not-very-successful actor from a large family of sisters. but, he finds himself in a predicament when he falls for muse a years later (his first time ever really falling in love) and she doesn’t feel the same. muse d eventually falls for muse b after an unlikely hook-up, their years of close friendship making for a great relationship foundation – although, they have their hardships in discovering muse b cannot conceive to have the family she’s always dreamed of. lastly, muse f is a quirky young woman who suffered a difficult young life after her father left, her mother committed suicide, and her step-father went to prison – she was homeless and poor for a long time before reconnecting with her grandmother and making a life for herself, but struggles to find a romantic relationship that sticks.

how i met your mother ↠ a young man (muse a) living in new york with his best friends goes through the trials and tribulations of trying to find “the one,” with many failures and regretted hook-ups along the way. ultimately he falls for a woman (muse b) who doesn’t want marriage and children like he does, but they become close friends and on-again/off-again anyway, as he believes she truly is the one. meanwhile his friends from college and now roommates, who are engaged, go through the motions of finding difficulty in dealing with each other’s careers, calling off their wedding, getting back together, getting married, moving into their own place, and trying to decide when is the right time to start a family. the final member of his friend group is a rich, detached, compulsive liar of a man with extreme abandonment issues and no desire to commit, having slept with over two hundred women, until he marries muse b in spite of she and muse a’s history together. muse b must deal with the fact that she is infertile, and even though she never wanted children, she hates that the choice has now been taken away from her – but her husband is fine with this, not appearing to want children himself. however, their divorce three years later causes him to spiral into his old cycle of hook-ups and he soon gets a woman pregnant, landing him with a daughter whom he adores. muse a strangely finds his real “the one” at the wedding of muse b and they go on to have two children together, much to her surprise as she previously lost her long-term boyfriend in an accident, until she falls very ill early in her life. (except we’re going to pretend the dumb show didn’t fucking end like that).

melissa & joey ↠ attempting to rise as a strong woman in politics isn’t easy when you’re following your father’s footsteps, and even less so when your sister and brother-in-law get caught up in a ponzi scheme and go to jail, leaving said woman to raise her teenage niece and nephew alone. matters are complicated further when she is forced to hire a nanny last minute – a once-rich man, now a recent divorcee with absolutely nothing to call his own and nowhere to go, thanks to being caught up in the same ponzi scheme caused by his new employer’s sister and brother-in-law. he moves in, and while he’s an expert nanny and genuinely cares for the kids, he and the woman get on each other’s last nerve every single day. and every single day, a little more of the sexual tension builds between them.

modern family ↠ a big, unconventional american family. an wealthy older man, head of his own business, with two grown children remarries, and his beautiful young latina wife brings her son into a new family. years later, she unexpectedly has a second son in her new marriage. the man’s grown daughter, a former wild child, married her goofy college sweetheart after falling pregnant with their eldest daughter – a daughter who is following her mother’s footsteps by making a lot of bad choices (dating asshole guys, staying out past curfew, sleeping around, getting too drunk, getting kicked out of college) before eventually landing herself a ‘good guy’ who has a likeness to her father. she has two siblings, a multi-talented younger sister (advanced in all her subjects at school with a love for science, plays the cello, sings, and does lacrosse) who is labeled as “nerdy” and doesn’t care much for partying or dating, and would rather lord her intelligence over others or study; and an oddball younger brother with a lack of common sense, often found doing stupid things but is found to have above-average intelligence – and later in life, becomes a little girl-crazy as he enters his teen years, but often embarrasses himself in front of them. the older man’s grown son is a neurotic, gay lawyer and in a long-term relationship with his partner. the man struggles to come to terms with his son’s sexuality even after many years, but adjusts more over time, particularly after the couple adopt a baby girl from vietnam together. they try for a second child through a surrogate but it falls through, leaving them heartbroken for some time. 

new girl ↠ a sweet, dorky, feminist young woman discovers her long-term boyfriend cheating on her and is forced to move out of their shared apartment, thanks to being completely in love with him and having always been a pushover to his every wish. desperately seeking a place to live, she discovers a call for a roommate on craigslist, and moves in with three men of similar age to her – one well-meaning failed professional basketball player, a womanising businessman, and an awkward grumpy slacker with no real direction in life. despite this, the girl ends up getting along well with her new roommates and, in time, falls for the slacker of the group. 

the new normal ↠ a wealthy, successful gay couple wish to have a child, and select a newly single mother of a nine-year-old daughter to carry their baby. her family are displeased with the decision, and thanks to her lack of money after leaving her husband, she ends up moving herself and her child in with the couple whom she’s surrogate to. 

*stares out into the deep void of 10:30pm tumblr, the dead hour*

*whispers* hi