knulla

Bill Skarsgård has really helped me better appreciate the Swedish language.
For instance, “knulla mig mördarclown far“ is a common phrase with no direct translation but the general sentiment is “your heart burns within my own” and I think that’s beautiful.

FLIRTING, LOVE and SEX in swedish

tjena kexet, står du här och smular? - literally means, hello cracker, are you standing here and crumbling?, used as “hello beautiful, what are you doing here?”

tjena snygging - hello hot stuff

får jag bjuda dig på en drink? - can i buy you a drink?

vad gör du sen? - what are you doing later?

hem till dig eller mig? - your place or mine?

jag älskar dig - i love you

jag tycker om dig - i like you

att ha sex - to have sex

att hångla - to make out

att kyssas - to kiss

att pussas - to kiss 

att knulla - to fuck

att gifta sig - to get married

att förlova sig - to get engaged

Kunde man få knulla för en hundring? sa han till mig
vid busshållplatsen klockan 0.42
med de tomma frostiga gatorna omkring oss.
Först skakade jag på huvudet, men sa sen:
Inte för pengar, men om du dammsuger och diskar.
Då vägrade han i sin tur
och vände sig nedslagen bort för att gå sin väg.

(Eeva Kilpi)

Date Night (SMUT)

With Pewdiepie (Felix)

Warning- smut and Swedish cursing ;)


I stretched my arms up over my head and reached restlessly for the zipper at the base of my neck. The damn thing was stuck. I’d been trying on dresses for dinner later that evening, and my shower was running, but I couldn’t for the life of me get the damn thing off. At least it looked good on me.

“Felix?” I yelled, hoping to get some help.

“Coming,” he shouted back from the office. I guess he was recording, or maybe editing. I hated to interrupt, but I needed help ASAP.

“What?” He asked, peeping around the corner. I jiggled my zipper and he laughed, “How did you get it stuck this time?”

“It just sort of happened,” I said, brushing my hair out of the way.

“Maybe if you’re just going to break your clothes you just shouldn’t wear any,” he smirked, tugging on the zip. I glanced over at his smug grin and giggled under my breath.

Finally, he tugged it past the hitch and slowly ran the zipper down my back to the base of my spine. I turned around and thanked him with a kiss, rubbing my hand across his fuzzy cheek. He was so darling. His hand rested on my hips for a moment, admiring my face, then smiling and walking to the door.

“Thanks love,” I smiled, “is this dress good for tonight?”

“Yeah, you look fabulous!” He sang, kissing my forehead, “hehe, no, but I like it. You always look beautiful.”

He returned to work and laid my outfit on the bed before I made my way into the shower, still blushing like an idiot. I had the best boyfriend ever. Felix was both a gentleman and gorgeous, my two favorite things in a guy. The thought of his hands on my hips was plastered to my face in a smile as the water ran over my head. I lathered the soap in my hair and thought about his hands on my head. His body would be pressed to mine. I found myself bitting my lip at the thought of him skipping his work to come play in the shower with me…

I could just see it. His hands exploring my body, his beautiful eyes and the lovely little smirk, that amazing body, and let’s not forget all that he’s packing below. He’d kiss me and we’d giggle, flicking bubbles at each other. He’d slid his limber fingers between my thighs and I’d find my hand stroking his hard cock. He’d rub so gently, but in just the rights spots, and I’d moan, oh how I’d moan. He’d press me against the wall, the water pouring over us. His hands would reach around to my breasts as he slid himself into my soaking vagina.

God, he’d take no time. He’d be all the way inside me within thirty seconds. I’d feel his thick cock inside me, throbbing along with myself. He’d pound into me, making my vision blur with bliss every time he rubbed past my g-spot. I’d slip my hand down and play with my clit as he slipped in and out of me. The cold tile on my face and chest would bring tingling sensations over my skin, just as his hands spark little electric gushed over my body. He’d leave kisses on my neck and back as he moved together in a fast rhythm.

I’d moan his name, “Oh Felix! Oh god! Harder!”

And he’d whisper lovely little thing into my ear, “You’re so beautiful. Do you like that? Oh helvete, knulla mig!”

It was so sexy when he spoke Swedish. He was so fluent and his voice was deep and confident. It made me want to go weak in the knees. Just the thought…

I found myself leaning against the wall, letting the water pour over me as rubbed my clit and felt my own soft, pink, skin. I wanted his touch so badly. I could do without though…


“Wow… You look amazing,” Felix smiled at me as I walked out of the bedroom.

He looked so handsome in his suit with his hair swept back. I grabbed my purse as we walked out the door. His cologne smelled so good. As we ventured out to the car, I told him about what I’d been doing at work, and he smiled one of those devious smiles.

“What?” I grinned.

“Nothing,” he cooed, getting into the drivers seat as I closed the passenger door.

“Really, what?” I giggled.

“Oh I was just thinking of what I want to do to you later,” he smirked, lighting the ignition.

“Oh god, I can’t wait to get this dinner over with,” I growled as we pulled out of the lot.

God, I love date night.

Dumhetens Gudinna - TID

Liv 
Ge mig allt
Jag väntar på dit pris

Life
Grant me all
I wait for your prize

Död
Ge mig allt
Jag väntar mig ett pris


Death
Grant me all
I wait for my prize


Lova mig
Att Inget har ett slut


Go
Promise me
That nothing has an end

Kom
Hylla mig
Sjung att jag är främst

Come
Worship me
Sing my praise


Jag är dumhetens gudinna
Hämndens Härskarinna
En hopplös älskarinna
Kom och knulla med mig

I am the goddess of stupidity
Mistress of vengeance
A hopeless paramour
Come and fuck me 
  

En avundsjuk väninna
Idioternas prästinna
Min dumhet kommer vinna
Du ska tänka den tid du har kvar

A jealous girlfriend
Priestess of fools
My folly will prevail
You will consider the time you have left

Vi borde tänka den tid vi har kvar
Vi borde tänka den tid vi har kvar


We should consider the time we have left
We should consider the time we have left

Liv
Flytta dig
Jag dödar vem jag vill

Life
Move aside
I kill who I wish


Död
Se på mig
Jag lever som jag vill

Death
Look at me
I live as I wish



Lura mig
Att ensam hitta hem

Go
Trick me
To find home on my own


Kom
Rädda mig
Ta mig I din mun

Come
Save me
Take me into your mouth

Jag är dumhetens gudinna
Hämndens Härskarinna
En hopplös älskarinna
Kom och knulla med mig

I am the goddess of stupidity
Mistress of vengeance
A hopeless paramour
Come and fuck me  

En avundsjuk väninna

Idioternas prästinna
Min dumhet kommer vinna
Du ska tänka den tid du har kvar
Du ska tänka den tid du har kvar

A jealous girlfriend
Priestess of fools
My folly will prevail
You will consider the time you have left

You will consider the time you have left

Vi borde tänka den tid vi har kvar
Vi borde tänka den tid vi har kvar
Vi borde tänka den tid vi har kvar

We should consider the time we have left
We should consider the time we have left
We should consider the time we have left

Keepsake

This is inspired by this ask sent to @imagine-papa-and-ghouls and also kind of a continuation of Thinking ‘Bout You.


The door to the hotel room slammed open, and they came in, a tangle of limbs, lips and tongues.

Keep reading

cheeji-cake  asked:

Prompt ideas: His good morning text to you is? His sext to you is always? :?

Nathan - morning: Hi.

Sext: Hi. I am totally hard for you right now. Nathan.

Skwisgaar - morning: Good mornings. Well, it amns’t reallys that good it ams a little diskapointskaments but.. you gets the general ideas.

Sext: Jag kan inte vänta med att komma hem och slita av dig kläderna och knulla dig tills du inte kan gå rakt.

Murderface - morning: Gooood morning sexy. I hope you’re not missing me too much ;)

Sext: I want you to think of me while you pee on yourself and send me a picture.

Toki - morning: God Morgen! I am thinkings of you every seconds beautiful and cannot waits to sees you laters! Loves you, Toki xxxxxxxxx

Sext: I hopes you ams gettins all squirmies thinkin abouts our cuddles! :) Også, hvis du ikke berører deg selv og tenke på meg, du hadde bedre være venter på knærne for din herre når han kommer hjem.

Pickles - morning: How much did we smoke last night cos honestly dude I can’t remember a fuckin thing.

Sext: Yer gonna be screamin my name so loud later every fucker in Mordhaus is gonna know I’m gettin some.