knowing-those-feels

Daddy’s Blunt Little Instrument...

You know, I’ll never not be absolutely devastated and upset about the fact that Dean probably knew how to shoot a gun before he knew how to read. That he could probably tell you how to get rid of a ghost before he could recite the alphabet. That he knew how to make himself and his little brother dinner and needed to find ways to support them when most other kids didn’t have to worry about anything really.

And I’ll also never not be absolutely devastated and upset about the fact that Dean has always used his entire body as a weapon. That he throws himself in headfirst with all his might, because he fights for the ones he loves with all he got. How he never cared about getting physically hurt.

And I’ll never not be absolutely devastated and upset about the fact that Dean always thought about himself as “a good little soldier”, “daddy’s blunt little instrument”, “as dumb and obedient as an attack dog” and with that let himself and his body be instrumentalized and treated like a weapon when we know that Dean is nothing of what Dean thinks of himself or how he sees himself.

And most of all Dean thinking of himself that way, doing no matter what and using himself and his whole body as a weapon, the show used to make Dean “truly become” a weapon, Michael’s sword.

He never said yes, so he never became that instrument, never played the part that was designed for him - and thank god he was strong enough to not let that happen. But isn’t it all kinds of sad and tragic and devastating to know that Dean Winchester, who fought so hard against him and his family getting instrumentalized and turned into weapons for divine battles out of desperation, out of self-loathing, out of a desire for redemption and punishment took on a burden, accepted a curse and invited a mark on his body that in combination with a blade in the end did turn him into what his mind has been telling him he has always been, nothing but “a good little soldier” (well he’s a knight, so it’s close enough), “a blunt little instrument” (the mark and the blade): a weapon (of mass destruction, because everyone who knows and comes close to him is cursed because of him, that’s what he thinks - so he keeps people at arm’s length, withdraws, says goodbye). A ticking time bomb that needs to be defused.

Yes, I willl never not be absolutely devastated and upset about the fact that Dean himself for most of his life has thought of himself as a “what” and not a “who”. And now weighed down and burdneded by a mark on his arm and a prophecy replaying over and over in his head, he finally realized that there is more to him than all that he thought, but that he thinks it’s too late for him now to ever experience it.

Don’t even look at me, I don’t know where this came from, it’s been a very Deantensive morning so far. ;__;

anonymous asked:

rex, what do u think of the "friends with benefits" thing??

RUN

But really, it depends. Usually with repeated sexual encounters feelings eventually come into play and then it’s typically a giant disaster. I’ve heard some happy stories but mostly they end on a sour note. If you keep having sex with a person and you get to know each other then those feelings of, “Why am I not good enough for you to date me?” come creeping in.

My last relationship started off as a friends with benefits kind of situation even thought I cared for him as much more than that. We eventually dated but it didn’t work out for very long and now we’re friends again with a lot of weird romantic tension.

Would I recommend that? Nah. There were a lot of nights where I wrestled with my self-esteem because of it which is never a good thing. I made the mistake of thinking that because I understood his distance that in time it’d be something more meaningful but it’s just been a struggle the majority of the time.

I don’t regret what I had with him because there were many, many happy days and memories I wouldn’t trade for anything. But I never want another friend with benefits situation ever again, if that says anything.

Just trust your intuition, dear. If there’s some hesitance in you it’s usually for a reason. Having fun from time to time isn’t a big deal but don’t do it at the cost of your emotional well-being. Always evaluate how a person makes you feel and the MINUTE they make you more unhappy then happy, just go. 

  • The world's greatest mystery:the orphan black blooper reel release date
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Because happy is what happens when all your dreams come true
                               Well, isn’t it?

anonymous asked:

Wait I'm confused about the markiplier thing could you explain...?

Okay, so, Markiplier made a video where he did the makeup challenge (it’s where you put on makeup with no mirror or anything). There’s absolutely nothing wrong or offensive about the video itself.

The issue actually came up when Markiplier used screencaps of himself from that video to reply to another person calling him ugly (see post below)

This reply is extremely hurtful and harmful to trans* people because it furthers the stereotype and idea that boys wearing makeup is funny. 

Furthering this type of ideal is extremely harmful to trans people and if you don’t believe me you should just go and look at some of the comments that were made on that video. 

Now, I’m not really saying that Mark intentionally posted the pictures with the intention of hurting trans people everywhere. But his response was very ignorant and very hurtful to a large group of people.

But then, instead of apologizing for something that he could have easily apologized for (like he has done in the past), he decided to make this post

which did a pretty good job of demonizing and erasing the feelings of a whole group of people.

Rough take speaking Thauma’s lines you made. (Wasn’t using good mic and need to to get more inflection from Disagea but I thought you’d find it amusing nontheless!)

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This is AMAZING. She sounds so feisty omg. When Wishy starts adding dialogues and stuff I’ll make sure you voice my baby. Thanks :v

If you sent me a nice message and are wondering why I never replied it’s literally just because I hoard them like a conceited dragon and one day I’m going to print them all out and roll around in them

I wish I felt more like a person and less like a list of diagnoses on a medical chart.

“Not bad…” That was the…seventh glass of wine he’d polished off. Hopefully no one would notice how he was treating it like water - not that he cared but Helen would and, for once, he had no interest in irritating her. Still, he went back for more and returned to watching the crowd.

quixoticstarkandroboticthoughts replied to your post: drove up back to feed the horse forgot how to…

[are you sure you’re not me I HAVE THE SAME FEAR and my mom is just like ‘:l’ get your license kelsey it’s not that bad. YEAH OKAY UNTIL I DIE.]

We are one and the same, Kelsey.

;n; But seriously, everyone’s like “OH GOD, GET YOUR LICENSE. You’re not allowed to ride with anyone else but a parent or family or an adult, and having to drive you everywhere is a huge drain on us even though you could get a bazillion rides with the people we said you can’t ride with, but whatever.” and I’m like “THANKS FOR ADDING GUILT ON TO MY FEAR. ITS A FANTASTIC THING FOR YOU TO DO.”

anonymous asked:

Can you elaborate on the TG fandom and the hate? I haven't really noticed, but maybe it's because I'm in the safe part of the fandom...

Yea sure thing sweet pea, and god you stay on that safe part, stay there and just enjoy it please god. 

But!!!! let me get a bit honest here:

  • i don’t ever remember people getting hate for liking a character?
  • i don’t recall people getting god damn death threats for like a pairing/or two characters together??
  • i don’t ever recall people getting hate for not being quote on quote good enough cosplayers?? or accurate enough??? like wtff????
  • i don’t remember there being so much drama???
  • i don’t recall there ever being so much damn hate on Tsukiyama Shuu there is a fact.
  • i don’t recall there being so much damn character hate in GENERAL lets put that there.
  • Pedophilia. That’s there now??? 
  • Artist hate.
  • Writing/Head canon/that stuff hate like did everyone on the earth just lose the ability to be civil and mannered????
  • And as of the last year?? half year??? people in this fandom and I’m not saying everyone god not everyone but a good hand full of people have just become vile, rude, crude and just aren’t nice for god damn one?? no manners??? like some one likes something/someone and in your entitled head you don’t say u want them to go die??? or end their life??? like buddy go get a life gosh