So Bluecoffeeowl has a hella cute Growing Up Together AU. I generally imagine these guys met later in life than this, but the idea of these three smol kids hanging out together as a troublesome and nerdy trio of best buds really amuses me, so I wanted to draw a little something for it. Stanley’s been teaching Rick how to box using Ford’s gloves.
Field Guide to Women’s Shoes: Know Your Heel Styles and Purposes.
Floral white six-inch stilettos.
PURPOSE: Generally used to elevate a petite woman and accentuate her posterior to encourage mating behavior.
OCCURRENCE: Most commonly worn by 20-something single women in search of sexual prey. Prevalent throughout the world, particularly in singles bars.
COMMON FIELD TERM: ‘Fuck-me Pumps.’
PRECAUTIONS: Typically not removed during mating rituals. Heel impalements can be common. If sighted, use extreme caution, and approach only if totally hypnotized and unable to resist. If ensnared, whimper softly ‘Don’t, stop. Don’t, stop. Don’t stop!!’
You know you married the right man when you wake up to multiple texts/calls from him trying to wake you up because your favorite store is having a huge sale and he needs to know your shoe size so he can get you the heels you’ve been drooling over months for.
- Telling people you don’t know where you got your shoes or clothes because they would laugh at you if you said “I got them from the Goodwill.” Being made to feel ashamed of the “benefits” you get that other kids don’t.
- Hanging your head in shame when other students bitched about their tax paying dollars going to the free lunch program.
- Having to struggle not to apologize for the aforementioned, because you don’t want anyone to know you get free lunch.
- Listening to all the other kids gush about their lavish Christmas gifts and when they ask you what you got you just say “Oh, just some clothes and things. I didn’t want anything else.”
- Eventually Christmas gifts just stop happening.
- Your friends looking at you weird beecause you never - literally never - have name brand anything. Not clothes or shoes or food. An iPod? Never even held one.
- Having to get a job at fifteen when everyone else you know is kicking back and waiting until they graduate.
- More wealthy kids being mad at you because you got so much more money from fasfa than they did and you have to bite your tongue to keep from telling them why you need so much more.
- Being made to feel ashamed over all the “benefits” you get that other kids don’t.
- Feeling ashamed when people say that those on welfare and food stamps are just lazy bums sitting on their asses collecting a paycheck when everyone in your family works and you still need foodstamps and you would still need the welfare your family doesn’t qualify for.
- Feeling like one of the most hated demographics and having to avoid people finding out you’re poor or else get bullied in school for all their parent’s tax dollars that are apparently going to you and people like you.