know your privilege

A string under my left ribs

Did anyone else notice how Silver referred to himself and Flint as a “we”, when talking about Billy? “Why are we not angry about this?”

Earlier in the season, Flint tells Billy that Silver would make it sound more palatable but that his will will govern. As in, me and Silver would be of a single mind, regardless, but he’s the one with the sweet words. 

“There is no we,” they said. 

And now they are we. As in, one

To whatever extent their feelings for each other go, romantic, sexual, platonic, whatever you wish to call it or see it as (Flint you need so much therapy for that emotional constipation, I cant even. That’s one thing Silver doesn’t suffer from - he’s ravenous for everything. Eager. Hungry. Will drink from whatever well he sets his sights on until he’s bloated with it. You get what I’m hinting at here?) I think they see themselves as one now. Sides of the same coin. 

Different but irrevocably tied to each other. In each other. 

Twins.

Soulmates.

The love of each other’s life.

In communion. 

We.

“I have a strange feeling with regard to you. As if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly knotted to a similar string in you. And if you were to leave I’m afraid that cord of communion would snap. And I have a notion that I’d take to bleeding inwardly.” Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë 

The danger lies when that “we” reverts back to “there is no we”. When that cord of communion is forced to snap. 

Here’s to the performers who have to reuse the same silks every season due to budget cuts. Here’s to the performers who wear either show blacks or cheap homemade costumes every season. Here’s to the performers who have to kill themselves dragging around an old floor that is devastatingly heavy because it’s been painted over so many times due to budget cuts. Here’s to the performers who either don’t have staff or only have staff for half a season before they give up.

Know your guard privilege.

I Can’t Wait to Hear You Scream PT. 8

Summary: You start to consider your position of being Negan’s wife. Sharing him wasn’t something you were too find of anymore given your feelings for him.

Note: Filler chapter. Filler chapter. Filler chapter.

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You followed Negan down the hallway to his room, being sure to check over your shoulder every now and then, just to make sure he wasn’t setting you up. He opened the door to his room and you walked in, looking around.
“Where’s Amber?” An attitude was rising in your voice.

Negan turned around, cutting his eyes at you, “In her room. Where the fuck else would she be?”

“I don’t know. I figured she was still here.” You said, crossing your arms.

“Fuck no. Like I said, darlin’, I don’t want any company. She is exactly where the fuck she is supposed to be, kind of like you, you should have been in your damn room too.” He pointed to you, with the whiskey bottle still in his hand, “What the fuck were you doing with Dwight?”

You smiled smugly. “I was just talking to him. What’s it to you?”

He gritted his teeth. “Because, darlin’, you’re mine and I don’t trust Dwight with my women after last time, maybe you noticed how one side of his face looks like fuckin’ shit. He got a punishment because he fucked Sherry behind my back.”

You scoffed, “Sherry was his real wife.”

“It doesn’t make a fuckin’ fuck to me. This a is a New World Order, sweetheart and there are rules.” He growled.

You bit your lip and shot him a wicked smile. “What’s the matter baby, are you jealous? Are you scared Dwight was thinking about fucking me right there on that table?”

Negan’s face instantly twisted with anger and he threw the whiskey bottle at the wall and it shattered, spraying glass everywhere.
He grabbed you by the neck and pinned your back against a wall.
“Darlin’, what’s it gonna take for you to stop back talking me? Everyday is something. I’ll admit it, it gets my dick fuckin’ hard, but it also gets under my goddamn skin.” He growled before he crashed his lips hard into yours, you gave in and kissed him back, his tongue sliding over your delicate lips and you coukd alreadybfeel yoirseld getting wet.
After a moment of weakness you came to your senses and pushed him off of you. He quickly backed away, holding his hands up, with Lucille still in hand.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” He demanded, furrowing his brows, his eyes were burning into you.

“You really think I’m gonna let you fuck me, right after you fucked Amber?” You snarled, with anger in your face as you stared back into his eyes.

“Yeah, so? She’s fuckin’ clean. The doctor checked her out before we ever even fucked the first time.”

“That’s not the fucking point.”

“Then what the fuck is the fuckin’ point, sweetheart!?” He bellowed, slamming a free hand against the wall.

You shook your head and threw your hands up, “I don’t fucking know.. but I think being a wife was a mistake and I think I would rather work for points like I had originally planned.”

Negan curled his lip and shrugged, “Fine, darlin’. It’s no skin off my fuckin’ teeth. But just know that all your privileges are fuckin’ gone. That means that you will obey me, you will fuckin’ work-” He moved in closer, putting his face inches from yours and proped Lucille on the wall above your head, “..And you will kneel.” He growled.
You hadn’t noticed until now just how much he towered over you. A bit of fear crept into you as he stood there, so angry and in your face. But you didn’t show it, you were much like Negan in a way, you were both extremely proud creatures. Although, you were in denial that you were like him.
You said nothing back and all you did was nod.
“It’s a fuckin’ shame, babydoll. You are the hottest fuckin’ wife out of them all.” He shook his head, leaning back up.
You turned quickly and headed to the door, you opened it, but turned back to look at him.
“It’s not that I didn’t wanna be a wife, but I can’t deal with Amber. You should know she threatened me.”

He rolled his eyes, “I’m not into fuckin’ monogamy, sweetheart. And you two better cut your back and forth shit out, she’s not gonna do shit anyway. Bitch couldn’t fight her way out of a wet paper sack. What are you gonna do, baby doll, fuckin’ kill her?”

“Let her try to hurt me and you’ll find out.” You growled back and left the room.


The next morning there was a loud knock on your door. It seemed like someone was always banging on your door lately.
“Come in.” You said in a dull tone.

The door opened and Simon was standing there, “You ready to go? You got work to do today.”

“Yeah, what am I doing?” You sighed, sliding on your boots.

“You’re back on laundry duty for the wives, same as last time.” He said, tapping his foot on the ground impatiently.

“Where’s Negan?” You asked.

“He’s gone. Besides, you aren’t a wife anymore, so unless he asks for you, you can’t just bother him anytime you want. You work for points now, so get your shit together and get downstairs and do your job.” He said flatly. He turned and left without another word.

You rolled your eyes, standing up and kicked the cot, making it rise off the floor. You were angry, he was putting you back on this just to fuck with you, knowing that you and Amber despised eachother. It was almost as if he wanted to see a fight between you two. You took a deep breathe and walked out of the room, you went downstairs and outside back to where the washtub was.
The wives were all standing around it with their clothes in hand, waiting.
Amber had a shit eating grin on her face, the bandage still attached to her nose.
You walked up to them and Amber quickly thrust the basket into your chest making you wobble at the force she used.

“Here are my clothes. Do a better fucking job this time, or I’m gonna tell Daddy.”

You rolled your eyes, snatching the basket, trying to get your anger under control.
“Yeah, and what’s he gonna do?” You gritted your teeth.

She gave you a smile, “Well, maybe you’ll get Lucille - like you deserve.”

You dropped the basket, “Look here bitch-” You started, but before you could finish, she pushed you back and you stood there in shock before you pushed her back.
You both stood there, waiting for eachother to make a move.

“Whats going on over here?” You heard a familiar voice, but knew it wasn’t Negan. You turned to see Dwight approaching, “Is there a problem?” He asked, looking at you and Amber in your standoff.

“Not at all.” Amber said flirtatiously, “(Y/N) just isn’t doing her job like she’s supposed to.”

Dwight looked to you and back to Amber, “Well, I’ll handle it from here. If she doesn’t do what she’s supposed to do, I’ll tell Negan.”

Amber smiled big, “Okay, thanks, Dwighty.” She winked before heading of with the rest of the wives.

You balled your fists and cursed under your breathe, picking up the basket and setting it on a table adjacent to the washtub.
Dwight looked over to you and sighed.
“Look, you gotta do your job, or I’ll have to tell Negan. You aren’t a wife anymore, you can’t just walk around doing what you want.”

“God, what did he do, tell everybody I’m not a fucking wife anymore?” You huffed while putting some clothes into the cold water.

“Yeah, Simon and me, that way we could report back to him that you’re actually working. Just do your job and keep your mouth shut if you wanna earn points. I’ll be back later on see if you get any.” He ordered and walked away.

You worked the rest of the time in silence as you washed the clothes, taking your time on each garment.
You knew you were now on thin ice and didn’t wanna offset anything more than it already was.
You didn’t wanna give up being a wife, you had feelings for Negan, but you couldnt deal with the other wives. Hell, you didn’t even have a problem submitting to him, you liked it, actually. But knowing he had other women hurt you in such a way that you’d rather not be involved.

After about 2 hours of handwashing, you were done. You hung the clothes on the line to dry and waited to be inspected.
Dwight finally came up after about 30 minutes.
He looked over all the clothes and counted how many clothing pieces there were.
“You got about 20 things washed here; for the day that earns you about 10 points.”

“Only 10? What about my suffering for washing Amber’s fucking underwear.”

Dwight was writing on a note pad and tore a piece of paper off and handed it to you, “Not my problem. This is your points, take it to supply or save it if you want, this is your pay.”

You looked down at the paper, it had your name, what your job was and how many items of clothing you had washed, along with Negan’s signature and Dwight’s as supervisor.

“Jesus Christ..” You whispered, “How fancy.” You said and rolled your eyes.
You crumpled up the paper and shoved it into your pocket. You didn’t even wanna get anything with it.
The sun was starting to set and the sky was a mix of purple and orange.

You were starting to head inside when you heard the creak of the large steel doors to the sanctuary open.
You looked over to see Neagn and about 20 of his men piling back into the sanctuary. He had Lucille high on his shoulder, covered in blood, smiling proudly. Everyone simultaneously kneeled as he walked past them, but you didnt.
Negan took immediate notice since he had his eyes on you from the time he walked in. He walked over to you, “You fuckin’ forgetting something, darlin’?” He smiled, showing straight white teeth.

“No.” You said, blank faced.

He made an “Mmm” sound with his mouth.
“I thought I told you to fuckin’ kneel?”

His men were all staring at you now, probably wondering if they were about to witness Negan beat one of his former wives to death. Negan took notice at his men - still on their knees - staring at the both of you and you challenging his authority as usual.
He took Lucille from his shoulder and pointed her bloody end at you, “Look at that shit, baby doll. You see that blood and those bits of flesh?”
He smiled as he saw you staring at the blood dripping from the barbed-wire.

“Yeah.” You said shakily.

“Mhm, good. So, you can fuckin’ see atleast. Well, that is what is left of someone else who didn’t wanna kneel.. You see where I’m getting at here, don’t you?” He chuckled.

You decided now wasn’t the time to push things any farther. You reluctantly lowered yourself onto your knees, looking up at him.

“Hell yeah, that’s what I like to fuckin’ see. Some goddamn cooperation. And might I say, darlin’,” he placed a hand on hisnleathee clad chest, “Seeing you down like that is a good fuckin’ look. Too bad you’re not a wife, I have a good use for that position.” He said with a wink, he walked away from and turned back.
“Goddamn, that ass still looks sweet as fuck.” He whistled and continued on.

And even though you seemed to be in an intense game of cat and mouse at the moment, it still turned you on to hear him talk to you in that way, his charisma and charm was too much to withstand.

youtube

What is “hearing privilege”? Check the video out to learn more.  My wife @mrsveganstew and I discussing the concept in a two parts series.  Second part coming out soon.

its important to recognise people of colour in the feminist movement.

does this mean people of colour are “better” than white people? no. that’s not what equality is about.

do people of colour face drastically tougher struggles than white people? absolutely. no question.

acknowledge what privileges you have without silencing the oppressed. together we can make the world a better place.

like obviously it’s okay to be straight in tjlc but acting as though you form some kind of an oppressed class within it is? really gross and unnecessary and also just acknowledge that you have privilege within and without it; acknowledge that you will likely get taken more seriously than any of us; know that if media coverage ever happens that the face of tjlc might not be an nb lesbian, it might be you and that’s part of your privilege. know that you’re not the most important people here, and know that this isn’t about you.

I don’t hate you because you’re White.

I hate you because you deny the fact that you have numerous privileges that make it easy for you to succeed in life while I’m obliged to work twice as good and my darker sisters have to work three times harder than both of us.


White people, Mixed people… know your privileges.