But consider this: Alternate ending to Pride and Prejudice where Darcy pays Wickham off and manages to convince Lydia to come back to Pemberley with him. Lydia’s still a bit upset, but Darcy tells her that her father and older sisters were worried about her, and that mollifies her for a while cause she’s never known them to be concerned over her before. Darcy and Lydia arrive back at Pemberley, and Georgiana is there to greet them. Georgiana and Lydia become fast friends, and Georgiana tells Lydia all about how terrible Wickham actually is. Lydia starts to realize that actually the way he treated her was wrong and gross and predatory. Darcy returns to Longbourn alone, having left Lydia at Pemberley with Georgiana. He tells Lizzie what he’s done, and about Lydia bonding with Georgiana. Not only is Lizzie incredibly grateful to Darcy, she also feels super guilty cause “God she’s my sister. Yeah she’s annoying as fuck but Darcy was there for my baby sister and I wasn’t.” Lizzie makes her peace with Lydia, and the two of them realize they have a fair amount in common. Also, Lydia loves Georgiana to the moon and back, and Georgiana is a very good influence like “Lydia maybe you shouldn’t drink that you’ll feel terrible in the morning. Lydia that soldiers trying to take advantage don’t dance with him.” Lydia learns how to read people a bit better as a result. Darcy and Lizzie and Jane and Bingley get married in a glorious double wedding. Lydia, Georgiana, Mary and Kitty are the bridesmaids. Caroline Bingley, unfortunately, was invited to a high profile event in London that she just couldn’t miss. Quite unfortunate, really. Darcy realizes that his sister has gone missing during the reception, walks in on Georgiana kissing Lydia in an empty room. Darcy and Lizzie are actually mostly fine with this cause “at least it’s not Wickham thank god”. Jane and Bingley are just like “well they’re happy and these crazy shenanigans are over so w/e”. Mr. & Mrs. Bennet just tactfully ignore the situation and pretend their daughter is helping Lizzie manage Pemberley or something. It’s about the same as pretending said daughter didn’t run off with a drunken, destitute, motherfucking [REDACTED]. Lizzie & Darcy and Jane & Bingley all have a shit ton of children, and Georgiana and Lydia are the cool aunts. George Wickham dies of typhus or some shit while fighting in some war in Europe. And they all live happily ever after. The end.

anonymous asked:

can you write a drabble where klaus paints caroline's naked body?

We loved this one written by @supremeuppityone and we think you will too!

A/N: Somehow, this evolved into an AU human Playboy-esque empire that features Klaroline. Warning: Delightful smut! Enjoy!

More than One Way to Paint a Cat

“Of all the bizarre things I expected to see in this place, this is certainly not one of them,” a crisp British accent teased, causing Caroline to sigh and mark her place in the textbook with her pink highlighter.

She crossed her bare legs, resettling her naked body in the comfortable suede makeup chair at the vanity, before regarding the intruder with a raised eyebrow.

“Define bizarre. It’s the Pretty Kitty Mansion — you’d have to put in some effort to come across as bizarre in this place,” she retorted, not bothering to mask the edge in her tone.

She was used to going on the defensive about her job; so many people, most of them hypocrites, were quite fond of telling her how awful she was to be exploiting herself. However, Caroline was a pragmatist, and when she started college years ago, she realized that the most lucrative way to support herself until she finished her degree was to pose nude for Pretty Kitty Magazine.

She hadn’t expected much at first — appearing in a handful of pictorials had allowed her to pay for several semesters of school and even start a small savings account. What she hadn’t anticipated was how popular she would become with readers. Long blonde curls, wide blue eyes and a petite, curvy body with an all-American, girl-next-door look that apparently readers couldn’t get enough of. It wasn’t until the Pretty Kitty Enterprises mogul himself, Alaric Saltzman, had contacted her to become a Pretty Kitty girl that she had realized the extent of her accidental success.

She had been upfront with him from the start — her education came first. She also put in her contract that she was strictly a print-and-appearances model only. She had no interest in the myriad of other businesses the adult industry had to offer. She had goals and plans and none of them involved becoming a household name in the adult entertainment industry. Working on the fringes gave her the funds she needed to finish school and hopefully open her own vet clinic one day.   

Today was one of her obligatory appearance days at the Pretty Kitty Mansion. They were hosting a huge football party for the typical mixture of Hollywood types and executives and Alaric expected his top Pretty Kitty girls to attend the party wearing a cropped jersey and tiny boy shorts that artists would paint onto their bodies.

She had been skeptical at first that it would look like nothing more than naked girls running around in a Jackson Pollock wet dream, but the test run they’d done the other day had surprised her with how real the paint had looked. It actually seemed as though the girls were wearing skimpy outfits rather than merely carefully applied paint. The textures, shadows and contours achieved by the airbrush had been breathtaking.

She had been looking forward to getting painted again just to see the artist operate, but apparently the artist they’d saddled her with today was going to be a judgmental jackass.

“Well, to answer your question, I expected more of a raging orgy or at least a feisty pillow fight,” the man stated, dimples bracketing his smirk, which under normal circumstances she would consider charming.

Caroline snorted. “Right, well, sorry to disappoint, but the orgies and pillow fights apparently take place when I’m not around. I’m a bit busy these days and I suspect those activities would be a huge time suck.”

She narrowed her blue eyes at the attractive man before her, trying not to openly stare at the hard planes of his chest as he moved, or the way his beautifully sculpted cheekbones accentuated his impossibly handsome face.

“You must be my artist today. I’m Caroline.” She held out her hand to shake and tried not to roll her eyes when he kissed her knuckles instead.

“Enchanted to meet you, Caroline. I’m Klaus.” He cocked his head toward the textbook in her lap and asked, “I’m curious, love, is Understanding Zoonotic Diseases typical reading material for a Pretty Kitty girl?”

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nemesis729  asked:

KC: "We are neighbours and your cat got my cat pregnant… so, wanna raise this little kitty family?"

Guest Writer @a-little-blonde-distraction wrote this next drabble and it certainly made us laugh!

And They Called It Kitty Love

Caroline teased the loops of her long fishtail braid, and spritzing her entire head with hairspray.

After clipping her embossed belt over her Rebecca Minkoff dress, she slipped her plum Liam Fahy pumps on and gave herself a once over in the mirror. Stylish, but not overdone or screaming that she was trying too hard.

Perfect for a quick intro with your hot new neighbor before heading in to work.

Caroline quickly but carefully descended the stairs of her duplex, grabbing her long strapped Vince Camuto purse and briefcase that carried all her work documents and files. She glanced around as she retrieved the foil-wrapped platter from the kitchen counter.

“Mariska… Mariska… here, pretty kitty kitty kitty…” Caroline called lovingly, expecting her white Scottish Fold to appear as she typically did when her mommy called to get her ‘Mommy’s going to work’ treats.

After a few minutes the sweet, blue-eyed cat was still M.I.A. Caroline glanced down at her watch and noted that she didn’t have any more time to spare for her fluffy child.

“Be a good girl for Mommy, Mariska…” Caroline called back into her house, balancing her bags and the welcome dessert.

She’d made it for the hunk that had moved into the duplex next to the one she jointly shared with Bonnie, a sweet girl who owned a holistic herb shop she’d inherited from her grandmother. According to Bonnie, the new occupant of 3B had an accent and an equally attractive brother.

Caroline’s job working at the local news station meant that she kept odd hours and was always leaving and coming back to the duplex at atypical times. Bonnie’s more lax schedule at her own business meant that she could be home a lot more than Caroline. Therefore she had more spying opportunities, or “observation opportunities” as Bonnie liked to call them, than Caroline. She was, however, more than happy to report back and keep Caroline informed in the long text message thread they kept up together.

Caroline crossed to the door, closing it and locking it behind her, then made her way to her Ford Fiesta. Setting the covered dish on the hood, she opened the door and set her personal bags in the passenger’s seat.

Quickly she retrieved the dish, closed the door and smoothed out her skirt then put on her thousand watt, wannabe-news anchor smile.

Confidently she strode to the door and brought a manicured hand up to knock just to the right of the gold 4B lettering on the door.

Less than a minute later, the handsome new tenant opened the door. He took her in for a moment, before a dimpled smile spread across his stubbled face.

“Hello, love. Can I help you?”

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anonymous asked:

Klaus pissed off the wrong witch and now he's been turned into a kitten. Our resident Vampire Barbie suddenly has a new pet. Fluffiness and hilarity ensues.

This prompt was filled by one of our fabulous guest writers, @a-little-blonde-distraction – a whole lot of fluff and hilarity included!

^^Kitty Klaus

The Adventures of Kitty Klaus

“What do you mean, you can’t change him back?!” Rebekah bellowed at the sheepish but tickled witch currently thumbing through her grandmother’s grimoire.

“Every witch practices from a different grimoire, so it’s nearly impossible for me to figure out the countercurse. Besides, do you know how many transformation and transfiguration spells there are? I mean, you’re the immortal one, feel free to spend your time scouring through spellbooks to unspell your brother…” Bonnie argued, feeling the urge to leave, when just then the only reason she was there rounded the corner to join the conversation.

Bonnie smiled as she saw her blonde best friend, swallowing her chuckle so as not to enrage the less affable blonde vampire who was still haughtily glaring at her.

“Well I think we should get some lemonade out of the lemons handed to us, if you know what I mean…” Caroline stated , plopping down in the armchair nearest to the witch, who paused in her mystical studies to watch her friend.

“What the hell are you talking about, Caroline? What lemonade is to be gained from this situation?!” Rebekah exclaimed, her hands going up incredulously.

“I mean… He could’ve been turned into something microscopic and hard to find, like a bug or something. At least this way he’s easy to find and keep track of… Besides, Kitty Klaus is kinda cute…” Caroline murmured, reaching down with her right hand to rub the top of the tiny Norwegian Forest cat’s head with her fingertips.

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anonymous asked:

Prompt for day 7 : kc + arranged wedding please.

HI people! I AM VERY SAD THAT THERE IS NO MORE AU WEEK!!! WAHH!! :( But all good things must come to an end. I’m very much looking forward to getting through all the new fics that have been posted!! 

Anyway, here’s my last contribution for the week. THANK YOU ANON for the prompt. I kind of got obsessed with this universe. Also thanks to @austennerdita2533 and @themikaelsoncupcake for reading through it and telling me I’m not crazy for writing this. Also to @nemesis729 this fits the prompt you gave me about the class argument! So thanks for that! 

Hope you enjoy.

Because I Love Her


“I really think marriage, as it stands today, should be a choice made by two people who are in love. A woman and a man, a woman and a woman, a man and a man, a trans woman and a cis man. Whatever.”

Week one of her third year women’s studies class and Caroline felt a twinge of pride at expressing her opinion. It was something she felt strongly about, and was excited when her tutor had asked their opinions on marriage as a warm-up question.

“While, historically, it was an institution, I think that feminism has developed to the point where it can be something women can enter into willingly, rather than something forced upon them.”

Then a voice spoke up.

“Oh, come now, love. Marriage is an institution, it’s been used since the dawn of time to strengthen political ties, ensure a family’s financial stability and to increase one’s clout. Romance was rarely a factor.”

And Caroline froze, she whipped her head around to the top of the lecture theatre, where her eyes locked with his. A tirade of conflicting emotions washed over her, and it took all her willpower not to jump up and flee the theatre. Hell, it took all she had not to flee the damn country.

“Seriously! I can’t believe you!”

They had started out friends.

“You can’t believe me? I thought given your own marital situation, you would agree with my point, as cynical as it is.”

Admittedly that had been a long time ago, but they had been friends. Best friends, in fact.

“And what about art? Music? Poetry? Literature? All these things have been portraying love and romance within relationships long before Hallmark was a thing, Niklaus.”

The class around them watched in awe and trepidation as Caroline and the newcomer tossed their arguments at each other as easily as if they were an old married couple.  

“Perhaps, but the majority of those texts were about the forbidden or unrequited nature of love. Never in terms of marriage.”

Caroline felt tears burn behind her eyes, but she jumped to her feet.

“Maybe you’re right, but marrying for love came from somewhere. Hallmark didn’t just decide it was a like 85 years ago. It came from unifying two people who want to be together. If you’re going to be tethered to someone for the rest of your life, you may as well want to be with them. And that’s what I believe, whether you’re too jaded and cynical to believe it or not.”

Klaus opened his mouth to offer his rebuttal when the lecturer spoke up.

“Perhaps, Ms Mikaelson, you and the newcomer, should take this argument elsewhere. Your points are valid, but you are now disrupting my class.”

She didn’t say it rudely, or with a hint of irritation, but she did say it with a finality that Caroline couldn’t ignore, so she scooped up her things, embarrassed.

“I’m sorry for being disruptive,” she said. “But please. It’s Caroline. Please don’t ever call me Ms Mikaelson again.”

And with that, Caroline stalked out of the class, her fiery, determined eyes on Klaus as she went. He looked almost smug at getting her kicked out of class. The two of them walked in extremely tense silence for a few minutes, until they had cleared the building and were out of earshot of anyone still in class.

“What the hell are you doing here?” she roared.

She was upset. Almost more upset than she had been in early November, almost three years previous. She let the tears fall from her eyes, as the emotions that always raged through her when he was around took hold of her body.

“Exchange,” he shrugged. “Oxford was boring, so I’m my final year here instead.”

Caroline’s mouth fell open, as she saw all of her beautiful carefree plans fall away.

“Please tell me there’s more to it than that, Klaus. Please tell me there was a parent involved, or something. Please tell me you didn’t take away my last shred of freedom because you were ‘bored’.”

“Caroline, sweetheart,” he said, softly, brushing a strand of her hair from her face. “I can’t tell you that.”

Klaus did have a tender side. She knew that. She’d always known that. She’d known it since she met him.

“Why do you have to do this to me?” she asked, thickly.

Caroline honestly thought she’d have two more years of freedom. Two years to be normal. Two years of being her own person, before family obligation took hold.  

“What do you expect from me?”

She didn’t know. Once upon a time she would have expected him to always be on her team. To always have her back. But these days…

“More. Something! I don’t know!”

As she looked into his eyes, for the first time in years, Caroline saw her everything she felt for him and about them, reflected in his eyes. It only served to confuse her more.

“Well, you shouldn’t have.”

Caroline’s face contorted in disgust, and she spat the only poison that ever seemed to work on him.

“I don’t know why I expected you to be less despicable than your parents.”

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