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Practical Shakespeare Quotes

Do you want to quote more Shakespeare in your life but never find opportunities to say “brevity is the soul of wit”? Do you rarely hang below balconies exchanging love vows with the daughter of your enemy? This is just the list for you.

“What an ass am I!”
Hamlet, Act 2, Scene 2

“I am not a slut,”
As You Like It, Act 3, Scene 3
(Not that there’s anything wrong with that.)

“Hell is empty and all the devils are here,”
The Tempest, Act 1, Scene 2

“Commit the oldest sins the newest kind of ways,”
Henry IV Part 2, Act 4, Scene 5

“This is the excellent foppery of the world,”

King Lear, Act 1, Scene 2

“Making the beast with two backs,”
Othello, Act 1, Scene 1

“The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool,”
As You Like It, Act 5, Scene 1

“To tell thee plain, I aim to lie with thee,”
Henry VI Part 3, Act 3, Scene 2
(Works great for courting hot widows.)

“I would rather hear my dog bark at a crow than a man swear he loves me,”
Much Ado About Nothing, Act 1, Scene 1

“I wasted time, and now doth time waste me,”
Richard II, Act 5, Scene 5

“Marry, sir, in her buttocks.”
A Comedy of Errors, Act 2, Scene 5
(No judgement here.)

“My horse is my mistress,”
Henry V, Act 3, Scene 7
(Uh, there might be something wrong with that.)

“Thou dost infect my eyes,”
Richard III, Act 1, Scene 2

“Better a witty fool, than a foolish wit,”
Twelfth Night, Act 1, Scene 5
(“Wit” is Shakespearean slang for penis.)

“[Wine] provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance,”
Macbeth, Act 2, Scene 3

“I had rather live with cheese and garlic in a windmill, far, than feed on cates and have him talk to me in any summer-house in Christendom,”
Henry IV Part 2, Act 4 Scene 1

“Now, gods, stand up for bastards!”
King Lear, Act 1, Scene 2

“Villain, I have done thy mother!”
Titus Andronicus, Act 4, Scene 2
(This means exactly what you think it does.)

“And thou unfit for any place but hell,”
Richard III, Act 1, Scene 2

“The first thing we do, let’s kill all the lawyers,”
Henry VI Part 2, Act 4, Scene 2

“Heaven truly knows that thou art false as hell.”
Othello, Act 4, Scene 2

“Out, dunghill!”
King John, Act 4, Scene 3

“This is too long.”
Hamlet, Act 2, Scene 2

Shakespeare Tragedies Renamed for the Modern tumblr Teen
Titus Andronicus: “Well That Escalated Quickly” Romeo and Juliet: “Shut Up, You’re Like 12” Julius Caesar: “I Came Out Here to Run the Roman Empire and I Am Honestly Feeling So Attacked Right Now” Hamlet: “[AGGRESSIVELY PRETENDS TO GO INSANE AND IN THE PROCESS GOES ACTUALLY INSANE MAYBE]” Othello: “Othello: Is my wife cheating on me?? Iago: Bitch, she might be.” King Lear: “Shows Up To Realization of Commonality with Humanity and Renouncement of Titles as Identity-Definers 15 Years Late With Starbucks” Macbeth: “Did It For the Vine” Antony and Cleopatra: “Much Rome. Very Egypt. Such Different. Wow.”  

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I find these pictures on Instagram or #Kingsglavie medias and credit by @finalfantasyxv_kingsglaive and I love all the pictures and I love all the characters 😺

Drautos sure says a lot of cryptic shit like I’m sure it becomes a joke amongst some of the Glaives because how could he not?

“Uhoh here comes Captain Edge Lord.”

One day Titus arrives to the briefing room late and walks in to catch Crowe doing a half decent impression of him in front of the other Glaives. And he just stands in the doorway and the laughter from the other Glaives just dies as they all start to notice him. When Crowe finally turns around there’s just dead silence and they just stare at each other for a moment.

“Decided to start without you, sir.”

“I can see that, Crowe.”

anonymous asked:

I woule like to request some gif reactions about the daddy!squad (Regis, Clarus, Cor, Drautos) about kissing, comforting and cuddling please ^-^

I hope these are good. I don’t know a lot about these character so I’m just going off my instincts ahaha. I got Cor tho. Cor and I are chill. Anyway, enjoy!
















The Signs as Shakespeare's Baddies
  • Aquarius: Richard III (Richard III)
  • Pisces: Aaron (Titus Andronicus)
  • Aries: Caliban (The Tempest)
  • Taurus: Don John (Much Ado About Nothing)
  • Gemini: Cornwall (King Lear)
  • Cancer: Edmund (King Lear)
  • Leo: Angelo (Measure for Measure)
  • Virgo: Lady Macbeth (Macbeth)
  • Libra: Iachimo (Cymbeline)
  • Scorpio: Tamora (Titus Andronicus)
  • Sagittarius: Iago (Othello)
  • Capricorn: Claudius (Hamlet)

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