king of vegas


He gave me 19 caps and then ascended to heaven. 

Hockey Phrase Definitions

  • Assist = I gotchu boo, have a goal
  • Blew a tire = ice much slippery
  • Boarding = wall for safe, not for face.
  • Breakaway = quick like a bunny
  • Chirping = much insult
  • Crashing the net = up close and personal, goalie edition
  • Delay of game = dumb
  • Dropping the gloves = gloves off, better for hugs
  • Empty net goal = participation award
  • Flow = to the fella over there with the hella good hair
  • Goaltender = marshmellow optimus prime
  • Holding = now is not the time for hug
  • Icing = belongs on cakes, not in sports
  • Jock strap = under the butt nut hut
  • Line brawl = much hugs
  • One timer = couldn’t do that again if I tried
  • Own goal = woo goal for the other team
  • Penalty box = pout place
  • Referee = not Denis Widemans friend 🐸🍵
  • Spearing = hockey players are not hot dogs

Hockey Returns vol. 100.  Excited!

If only there was an international event that NHL players wanted to go to.

Originally posted by nansgifs


New Jerseys being released this month

  • joseph: *gets pulled into utility closet* what the heck? what's going on?
  • craig: sorry, bro. but desperate times call for desperate measures. you, my bro, are coming apart. everyone's concerned; that's why we're all here.
  • mary: ... actually, i was already in here having a cry.
  • robert: no- craig is right. you're a fuck up, joseph! we want you gone.
  • ernest: yeah!
  • craig: no, we don't... ernest, what are you doing here?
  • ernest: hugo sent me to get a mop.