Seijou Players as Things That Have Been Said in my Workplace
Oikawa: Look, I’m not gonna say it was aliens. Because that should go without saying. I’m just gonna say, maybe use the side door for awhile.
Iwaizumi: Is there anyone here who DIDN’T google how to do their job??
Hanamaki: (Talking to a tray of burnt cookies) How dare you. How dare all of you. What kind of disrespect-
Matsukawa: Actually I was hired for my impeccable jazz hands, the memes were just a bonus.
Yahaba: Hey, I’m super ahead of schedule, so I’m just gonna go have an existential crisis real quick. I’ll be back in like thirty minutes.
Kyoutani: I took this job because I wanted to avoid people. Leave me alone with my bread.
Watari: Can you get that bag of flour down for me? I’d do it myself but it’s literally bigger than me. And above me. I don’t want to go to the hospital before lunch.
Kindaichi: I like to think I have realistic goals. I want to suck less. I don’t have to not suck at all. Just… less.
Kunimi: (Hand bleeding profusely) Goddammit it is too early for this. I’m getting coffee and a bandage IN THAT ORDER.