Me: Urm, I was out yesterday with Kim, but then freaking Willow Pape called me ratchet because she thought that I was flirting with her D-list boyfriend, Dirk Diamonds, What kind of a name is that?! So we had to sort it all out with Simon and he was trying to be all cool like saying Yolo but just no so I ended up having a shoot because Simon never stops calling.
Mum: ….Oh…. Who’s this Willow?
Me: Eurgh I don’t even know she just hates me Kim for no reason because she’s jel because her boyfriend flirts with everyone except for her and her hair is a birds next.
Mum: and who’s Kim? You’ve never spoken of her before?