killing time until i go out

100 Dialogue Prompts: Part 4

It’s amazing to see how much we can create together, my amigos. Here’s part 4.

  1. “Look, I might be evil but even I have standards.”
  2. “Do your parents know you’re dating Death?” “No, I promised we wouldn’t get back together after he broke up with me the first time.”
  3. “Wait why am I naked and covered in cheese?”
  4. “Good god, that cake is fuckin stale and dry mate!!” “Just like how you are recently? Gee, thanks.”
  5. "There is always time for a high-five.”
  6. “Karen, what would ever posses you to find me here.”
  7. “Oh my god, put that man down! Come on, let’s go get you some REAL food.”
  8. “A demonic sugar glider?”
  9. “People always say they never thought they would be here but I absolutely did.”
  10. “And I thought I was a bit weird. But you! You are insane!”
  11. “So your hair knows kung-fu? Ha, that’s nothing! MY hair knows HAIR-ATE!” (You know, as in karate) (This used to be an insider between me and a friend…)
  12. “One day, darling, you and I are going to conquer the Universe not just our world.”
  13. “Did you seriously think they wouldn’t notice when their humans went missing?!”
  14. “Well, maybe next time you should consider that not everyone wants to be woken up at four in the morning by a- what IS that, anyway?!”
  15. “Now, how exactly did your foot get stuck in the barrel?”
  16. “I hope you realize what you’re doing. This forest never ends, you know that, right?”
  17. “You can’t just kill someone and then make it all better by saying sorry!”
  18. “Why the fuck is my cat levitating?!” “He said he wanted to feel what flying was”
  19. “You’re trying to tell me you killed three men…with a microphone?”
  20. “Hang on, are you a John Wick fan?”
  21. “IT’S TWO IN THE MORNING!” “And?” “ I have a strict no murder rule until eight. Call me then.”
  22. “I did realize you were going to be naked the whole time”
  23. “Ok, I understand you like animals, but you can’t just bring a tiger into the apparent without asking!”
  24. “I…I didn’t want you to find out like this. I’m so sorry.”
  25. “OH MY GOD CATHERINE! I JUST SAW A NARWHAL! I’M TELLING YOU, I SAW A FREAKIN’ WHALE UNICORN!”
  26. “I gotta go, I left my toaster in the oven!
  27. "Why is there a gaggle of fancy buisness men on my front lawn?”
  28. “Can you please stop referring to me as ____! That’s not my name!” “Then what is?” “I don’t know!”
  29. *Sarcastic* “Yeah, sure. I won’t at all mind being your footslave.” “Oh, goody! I knew you’d agree!” “Wait, what?”
  30. “When are you going to give up on this whole ‘evil’ thing?” “When it stops being so much fun!”
  31. “You didnt say to KILL the man!” “WELL I DIDNT SAY NOT TOO”
  32. “Mum, Dad… I’m gay.” “That’s nice, honey, but now is not the right time!”
  33. “Take a look at your soul and consider your life choices! Oh wait, that’s right! You don’t fucking have a soul!” “Oh, god, just go drown in a bathtub of syrup why don’t ya?”
  34. “I kindly ask you to please quit making your heart stop. It’s creeping me out!” “So… Y-You were sleeping in a coffin” “Yeah I’m used to it” “Are you a vampire or what?! How can someone get used to sleep in a coffin?” “No I’m used to sleep I never said that I’m used to sleep in a freaking coffin!”
  35. “Darling I love you, more than I can ever express in words…. But please stop teaching chickens necromancy.”
  36. “I wanted to know why you stole souls, not your melodramatic backstory…”
  37. “I really wish that old white man would stop rubbing his nipples at me”
  38. “You know it is written: Do not summon Satan, right ?”
  39. “Look around, what is this?” “My room?” “No, this is pathetic.”
  40. “I’ve been a professor for 20 years, and yet still my greatest secret hasn’t been revealed–I can’t read.”
  41. “Our souls don’t belong in these 'human’ bodies, every one of us is implanted here from another galaxy, and this has been the case for a thousand years. No one knows what 'actual humans’ are like without us inhabiting them.”
  42. “Did you just create a portal in time and space to pull another version of yourself into this world so I have to deal with another annoying idiot?” “No but thanks for the idea.”
  43. “You’re bleeding?!” “Nah, I’m frolicing in a field of flowers - yes I’m bleeding!”
  44. “Let me get this straight. I tell you that I make a decent omelette and you somehow equate that to qualification for piloting a spaceship?”
  45. “It’s the weekend! Let’s hit the town! See a concert, redo our wardrobes, get high, start a crime ring, I don’t know.”
  46. “Keep running, you’ve only got 4HP!”
  47. “This is clearly your first time. Stop screaming already, you’ll wake the neighbors!”
  48. “Has anyone seen the outdoors?” “What the fuck is an outdoors?”
  49. “Why do I feel like this again, I thought we were done with this?”
  50. “Look, as much as I like to hang out with you, I’ve gotta go and save the earth. Toodles!”
  51. “Have you seen?… oh shit”
  52. “Two questions: one, how many matches do you have, and two, where do you keep your socks?”
  53. “Because fuck surveys, that’s why!”
  54. “Stop yelling out the window or the koalas will rip your face off!”
  55. “I guess when I heard 'Night of Debauchery’… I didn’t picture muffins on your pajamas.”
  56. “Honey, you can’t keep throwing people to the pit of pain and despair just because they don’t like choc mint ice cream.”
  57. “Oh, no honey, put that back…”
  58. “It’s going to be too late, you know. It’s always too late.”
  59. “Hey, so, uh… I’m in trouble…” “What did you do this time?” “I got stranded in Wales….. again…”
  60. “OK, but… how do we get the dog out of a hole in space in time exactly?”
  61. “Aren’t people supposed to grow instead of shrink ?”
  62. “Wait. You’re aroused?” “Why would that surprise you?” “It does on account of you being covered in blood. Wipe that smile off your face. You look like a cat in heat.”
  63. "I pay your taxes”
  64. “No, ____. We did not raise our hamster like this.”
  65. “You can’t run from your own shadow(s), what makes you think you can run from theirs?”
  66. “You adopted… a dog?” “Mate, that’s not a dog.”
  67. “And at this moment, he decided to punch himself in the face.” “Narrator, listen, I know you’ve been with me my whole life, but you’re a huge jerk.”
  68. “Why didn’t you tell me it was a portal BEFORE we ended up here?”
  69. “Is that…the Mona Lisa.” “…Yes…” “What did I say to you about stealing priceless artifacts!?” “…That I had to take you with me next time.” “Exactly!”
  70. “Yes, I agree, magic is pretty cool. But did you really have to use it for THIS?”
  71. “Despite the fact that was epic, you’re still suspended”
  72. “Chill, dad it’s not what you think it is!” “Well it looks like you’re making out with the demon your grandma banished to cellar…WHY IS HE IN YOUR ROOM?”
  73. “If you truly love me you’ll let me-OH FUCKING HELL DID YOU JUST STAB ME!?”
  74. “Spoon”
  75. “What began as a conflict over the transfer of consciousness from flesh to machines escalated into a war which has decimated a Million worlds.The ___ and the ___ have all but exhausted the the resources of a galaxy in their struggle for domination. Both sides, now crippled beyond repair, the remnants of their armies continue to battle on ravaged planets, their hatred fueled by over four thousand years of total war. This is a fight to the death. For each side, the only acceptable outcome is…“
  76. ”… I’m going back to bed. You brought it here, you can deal with the mammoth yourself.“
  77. "Is the food supposed to be moving?”
  78. “You mean to tell me that in the two minutes I was gone,  you bombed a minor country,  got married to a stripper,  and assassinated a world leader?!”
  79. “Is that a unicorn???? EATING MY BEEF JERKY?!”
  80. “Do I get to dream about you again tonight?”
  81. “Well now I have to change clothes AGAIN!”
  82. “All of this was because of a… OF A PLUSHIE?!” “Well…Yeah?” “Great, how are we going to get out of jail now?!”
  83. “So…you gonna tell me why my brother is upside down and why you’re wearing my purple thong?”
  84. “Did you really have to burn down another Cracker Barrel?”
  85. “Sir, that’s impossible, you can’t do that.” “IS THAT A FUCKING CHALLENGE?!?!”
  86. “We need to invade Portugal.” “…Sure, why not?”
  87. “Did you divide by zero?! YOU’RE GOING TO KILL US ALL”
  88. “Stand down, Milady, this is a matter between gentlemen with mustaches.”
  89. “Next time you get arrested I am NOT paying your bail” “That’s a lie and you know it.” “….”
  90. “I thought you were dead.” “So did I”
  91. “John dont flush the dog down the toilet”
  92. “What did I say again about resurrecting dictators??”
  93. “Cucumbers are NOT pets… what do you mean, you ate him??”
  94. “Are you and God seriously fighting right now? And what happened to Satan?”
  95. “Are ferrets supposed to be blue??”
  96. “I’m the protagonist? Well I guess that explains why I look like about a thousand other people.”
  97. “Why do I do this to myself?”
  98. “Stop eating your tortilla chips with ketchup. It’s unattractive.”
  99. “How do you eat an entire cheese wheel in one sitting?”
  100. “Why are God and Satan moving in with us?”

Let’s make one more ‘100 Dialogue Prompts’ list together. Leave a comment with your prompt below. Don’t forget the double quotes “”. And as always, only one prompt per amigo! Also, here is your random Dutch word of the day: pindakaas

The Signs as Things Said in 13 Reasons Why

Aries - “Dream big, they say. Shoot for the stars. Then they lock us away for 12 years, tell us where to sit, when to pee and what to think. Then when we turn 18, and even though we’ve never had an original thought, we have to make the most important decision of our lives.”

Taurus - “Favorite kind of music, ‘obscure indie bands’ ” *Tony’s little nod* 

Gemini - “There’s all kinds of ways to feel lonely. The kind of lonely I’m talking about is when you feel you’ve got nothing left”.

Cancer - “You can’t love someone back to life”. “You can try”.

Leo - “Everyone is just so nice until they drive you to kill yourself. Sooner or later, the truth will come out. It’s gonna come out… Welcome to Liberty High”.

Virgo - “I can never make it right, I can never say all this to you, but I love you and I will never hurt you. I’m not going to, not now, not ever ”.

Libra - “Boys are assholes. Some are assholes all of the time. All are assholes some of the time”. 

Scorpio - “I needed a change, just like they said, so I changed my appearance. The only thing I still had control over”.

Sagittarius - “It was a hot chocolate friendship. Good for the cold months, but maybe not perfect for all seasons.”

Capricorn - “At that moment, everything was perfect. And for the first time in a long time I could imagine a future where I was happy”.

Aquarius - “Losing a good friend is never easy. Especially when you don’t understand why you lost them in the first place”.

Pisces - “You can’t go back to how things were. How you thought they were. All you really have is… now”

I would like to tell you a story, if you’re willing to listen.

It’s the story of how, four years ago, I was depressed. Few people noticed, because I was a “good kid” who had straight A’s, didn’t get into fights or talk back, didn’t do drugs or drink alcohol. I didn’t fit the “type” so I flew under the radar. Six months later, I was self harming and severely suicidal. I tried to kill myself three times in the span of two years, until Fall 2015, when I stopped going to school and it became obvious that I was not okay. My mom (my wonderful, strong mom) reached out to my school and that kickstarted the process of therapy. It took me 18 months and a hell of a lot of fighting against myself, but I’m happy to say that I no longer consider suicide an option for myself. It doesn’t flash in the back of my mind like an emergency exit sign anymore.

My point here is, being suicidal does not signify the end of your story. That is why I hate seeing hype around a certain show, that I’ll keep unnamed because I don’t want to give it more advertisement than its already gotten, that romanticizes suicide. It makes it look like the ultimate revenge, the biggest “fuck you” to everyone who did you wrong. Let me tell you, that’s not right. Want to know the ultimate revenge against those who wronged you? Living, saying “I’m still here despite all you’ve put me through.” Not a series of tapes putting the blame of your death on everyone around you.

I’m not posting this for pity or anything of that flavour. I’m posting this because it seems to be the only way I have left to try and make you understand why media like this is so toxic, and how wrong those narratives are. Truth is, most people, as far as my experience goes, have considered suicide at some point in their life, and the solution to the suicide pandemic in our society is not some show glorifying it on Netflix. That’s all I have to say.

Signs as things Stiles has said

Aries: “I’m too upset to come up with a witty way of how I’m going to kill you.”

Taurus: “You’re killing people. To death!”

Gemini: “What a dumb idea. Do it.”

Cancer: “I can’t take waiting around like this, ya know. It’s nerve-wracking. My nerves are wracked. Wracked.”

Leo: “Do you wanna just try making out for sec? Just to see how it feels.”

Virgo: “Someone needs to sex me right now!”

Libra: “Sorry coach, I haven’t seen him since the last time I saw him.”

Scorpio: “Personally I’m a huge fan of ignoring the problem until eventually it just goes away.”

Sagittarius: “There may have been a bit of maiming, a little mangling, but no death.”

Capricorn: “I’m 147 pounds of pale skin and fragile bones, okay? Sarcasm is my only defense.”

Aquarius: “You swing for a different team but you still play ball, don’t ya Danny boy.”

Pisces: “Sounds like the beginning of a heartfelt story, but I’m gonna pass.”

Derek shows up to his first pack meeting after moving back to Beacon Hills wearing worn out jeans and a faded flannel, chest hair popping out near the top. His beard is full, his hair is longer, almost long enough for a bun, his eyes have smile lines. He’s happy. 

Stiles walks in late, his hair disheveled, his jeans a little tighter than they used to be, his black teeshirt clinging to his arms and chest in a way that made Derek’s mouth go dry. And don’t get him started on the tattoos, the vines and runes that twist up Stiles’ arms.  

“I thought I heard someone brooding,” Stiles says before he really even sees Derek, but when he does his jaw drops, “Who are you and what have you done with Derek Hale?”

And Derek, he laughs, “Hi Stiles, you look good.”

“Me?” Stiles sputters, his heart racing and his eyes wide, “Have you seen yourself? You look like a sexy lumberjack.”

Derek’s eyes go a little wider, his lips tug up in a private smile. It’s like they’re the only two people in the room. All he can hear is the steady beating of Stiles’ heart, all he can smell is the cinnamon and clove scent that is Stiles, all he can see are those honey brown eyes, at least until Scott clears his throat. 

“Uh guys, can you maybe eye fuck some other time? We’ve got three trolls in the preserve and we need to get them out before they kill someone,” Scott says, eyes darting between his returned pack member and his emissary. 

“Yeah, sure, yeah, we can fuck later,” Stiles says sounding a little dazed. Derek swallows and nods, eyes still on Stiles.

“That’s not what I said,” Scott mutters, turning away from the two of them and back to the rest of the pack, “I think we’re going to have to take care of this without Stiles and Derek’s help.”

“Can you manage that?” Stiles asks, shaking his head a little, “Something just came up and I’m busy now.”

“Just go,” Scott says with a small laugh. 

Stiles and Derek are out the door before Scott’s done talking. They emerge from Stiles’ apartment two days later both smiling and holding hands. 

❉ = fluff / ✥ = angst / ✱ = comedy / ✺ = 😏

admins favorites = 🍑 / 🥝


JIN

YOUR WORSE THEN NAMJOON

i don’t mind people finding out

pancakes

you ruined my pickup line

unrelated topic, did you like what you saw ?

okay, i give you permission to kill him, but please wait until Thursday 🥝

guess who loves you

DO YOU NOT WANT ICE CREAM ???


i take you out one time and suddenly i’m the local delivery guy ?? ❉ & ✱

i like you too, like a little… little lot. ✱ & ❉

👉🏼👌🏼 ?

i’m not kidding tho where does he live i’m already in the car angry and ready to go

if i have to listen to management nag about weight one more time i’m marching straight out of this building

YOONGS

i am not cute

i don’t want to talk to you anymore

come help me out here ?

if it makes you feel any better ur a great chair

roasting you is like the best part of my day

i need lady stuff

what happend to the yoongi who doesn’t take shit from anyone ? ❉ & ✥

are you texting me song lyrics ?

come to the studio and sit on my lap ✺ & ✱

text me, call me, email me, send a letter; for all i care it could be by pigeon

i promise i only type like this when i like the person i text

completely giving up, starring me.

he’s just not hitting anything other then my knees

i was thinking about making out with you all day

not the pillow part you one celled creetin

lets get another doggo

thank god, i’d thought you’d never leave me alone

yeah being as short and mean as you is a real gift.

soft min family™️

HOBI

fuck the fuck off

can i have like five of you ?

ur so pretty

have fun with math

but hobi wants some love ❉ & ✱

that’s cuz im trying to communicate with u

jung hoseok you’ll be the death of me

i wanna kiss your face every time i see you too

you know i support everything you do right ?

where did all that wisdom come from ?

stop talking to the small man

series : big bro hobi

i’m disowning you.

BOYS WILL EAT YOU ALIVE

JOON

you still up ?

yeah i can rap like the entire thing

right, and what does your mom call you ?

sure, have fun with my bras

that’s because you don’t speak Korean

i see you’ve had a few drinks ❉ & ✱

i miss your face

I’m not wearing any fucking underwear, because you never put the fucking laundry in the fucking dryer like I asked you to 100 times ✱ 

i better be ✥ & ✱ 

the company told me not to go but i couldn’t disappoint you like that

i have to go look for a new job

CHIM

ur such a loser

but you dont like shopping

the disrespect in this one is strong

it was supposed to be a surprise

you mean my singing ? ✱ & ❉ 

he’s just jaelous his dongsae had a child before him

very funny babygirl ✱ & ✺

we’ll go wherever you want

yoonmin : you’re like a candy bar jimin, half sweet half nuts.

you want me to come over ? we can cuddle

i cant sleep, are you up ?

is little jimin mad ? or should i say regular jimin ? ❉ & ✱

TAE

Hey ! i bought you ice-cream

the inventor of snapback look™

tae don’t you think the pillow wall is a bit of an overkill ?

thank god at least one of you know how to make a move

you’re not disappointing anyone by eating breakfast and lunch ❉ & ✥

did you do the english assignment ?

it’s just like 99.999% your fault

vkook : THIS IS A SHARED DORM

you’ll send me letters everyday right ?

are you telling me you’ve been smart this whole time ?

it’s in my job description

JK

wassup dudette

ayo ladies and gentleman

send nudes

what are you doing right now ?

look how cute we are

i just have a strong disliking to your personality

i like our bickering

babe i need your opinion ✱ & ✺

i’ll buy you food for a week if you tell me i’m your favorite

you could pay me a million and i still wouldn’t consider it

i didn’t want to leave your side that night because i wanted you to feel safe

stop kicking my chair

what does oppa mean ?

i miss every little thing you do

i’ll give you three breadsticks and a goat if you give me jimin

in your dreams

jk he’s not lord voldemort

i didn’t think this one through

good job, guk 

i’ll always be your kookie

some of us actually need school jk

the village called. they want their idiot back, you better get going.

happy removal day

2 OR MORE

yeah and i’m just implying that i want to take you out on a date

what are you an owl ?

jin just made the worse recipe ever and i doubt he put ANY effort into it

i don’t like going outside

absolute soul mate has 16 letters and so does fuck jungkook asap

you’ve both got the same mental age

you are pure evil

i’m so whipped, this is incredible

for now i’ll have your lovely messages to look forward to ❉ & ✥

dont mess with me park ✱ & ❉

i like to send nudes ok ? if that’s my biggest flaw i think i’m ok.

if you were any thicker you’d look at the weather app outside

don’t start with me pindick

i’m not related to you anymore

we don’t want him

he really wanted to be in the picture

softie.

i can’t believe you saw mini nochu

i gain 3k for every shirtless picture

the power of jjang jjang man

next time you plan on rapping verse1 invite me

i’ll tell them to stop bothering you

okay, but if it attacks my dog i’m giving it to jimin ✱ & ❉

CRUSH CANCELLED ✱ & ❉

way to ruin the mood loser ✱ & ✺

dont act so smug you little shit

tell him to drop dead, with my compliments

you use that meme when you get nervous ✱ & ❉

was i your second choice ? ✱ & ❉

he’s a little small, but he’ll do ✱ & ✺

bring me some vodka and condoms ✱ & ✺

your butt rights have been invoked

one can never know too many counting systems ✱ & ❉

all he’s done to me with his 10/12 looks

i’ll take you out on a real date when ur older

i dont know what your problem is, but i’m guessing its hard to pronouce

that was my… goldfish.

you did not just call me your dog

STOP ASKING THINGS I WANT TO HEAR

i’ve been staring at the wall for the past hour

HORSES DONT EAT PEOPLE

cheating series :

hold on imma go beat his ass

i told him the only thing smaller then him is his dick

this bitch gonna die tonight

i’m going to jail when i see his ass

when u gotta kill your hyung

dumped him so hard he probably got whiplash

losing a member series : 

we bangtan 6 now 🍑

how is it you’re the smartest and dumbest person i’ve ever met

YOU LOST HIM DIDN’T YOU

how do you manage to lose a human being ??

gang au series :

you act like you’ve never been shot before !

but did you die ?

is everyone alive and not in jail ?

mafia gangs dont have facebook pages.

one little girl thought it was cool i was covered in blood

teasing members series :

confess or i’ll set your mattress on fire

namjoon i will call your mother

so when are y'all getting kids

i will literally launch you into the sun

VIDEOS

footage of me at the club

footage of me at a house party

footage of me in the kitchen

footage of me with friends

why i shouldn’t be allowed to edit part 1

why i shouldn’t be allowed to edit part 2

° ✧ SUPERHERO SENTENCE STARTERS.

❛ I’m here to fight for truth, and justice, and the American way. ❜
❛ You wanna get nuts? Come on! Let’s get nuts! ❜
❛ I hope justice is found here today… before justice finds you. ❜
❛ Give me a scotch. I’m starving. ❜
❛ Our ancestors called it magic but you call it science. ❜
❛ I come from a land where they are one and the same. ❜
❛ This is my gift, my curse. Who am I? I’m _______. ❜
❛ Cats come when they feel like it. Not when they’re told. ❜
❛ How am I supposed to tell crime to shut up if I have to shut up? ❜
❛ I don’t know the meaning of the word “quit”. ❜
❛ You can’t trap justice! It’s an idea, a BELIEF! ❜
❛ Sometimes people deserve to have their faith rewarded… ❜
❛ He may have my soul but he doesn’t have my spirit. ❜
❛ Didn’t I kill you already? ❜
❛ Thirty hours of pain all at once, all for you. ❜
❛ I have something to give you. I don’t want it anymore. ❜ 
❛ And some day, when he’s needed, we will see him again. ❜
❛ Listen to me very carefully, my friend: Killing will not bring you peace. ❜
❛ Wise man say forgiveness is divine, but never pay full price for late pizza. ❜
❛ You get hurt, hurt ‘em back. You get killed… walk it off. ❜
❛ Some men just want to watch the world burn. ❜
❛ I believe there’s a hero in all of us. ❜
❛ Because he’s the hero this city deserves, but not the one it needs right now. ❜  
❛ So, we’ll hunt him, because he can take it.  ❜
❛ With great power comes great responsibility. ❜
❛ Would you rather die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain? ❜
❛ That’s kind of catchy. It’s got a nice ring to it. ❜
❛ You know all those dangerous mutants you hear about in the news? ❜
❛ Why do we fall, sir? So that we can learn to pick ourselves up. ❜
❛ Beneath this mask there is an idea. ❜  
❛ You will give the people an ideal to strive towards. ❜
❛ They will kill you if they get the chance. Do not give them that chance. ❜
❛ At least I’ve chosen a side. ❜
❛ You ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?  ❜
❛ Oh, no… this is Earth… isn’t it? ❜
❛ Dead or alive, you are coming with me. ❜
❛ Sometimes you gotta run before you can walk. ❜
❛ Let’s put a smile on that face. ❜
❛ Sorry about the window folks, I kinda misjudged the landing. ❜
❛ There is you. There is I. There is no we. ❜
❛ It’s not who I am, but what I do that defines me. ❜
❛ Peace was never an option. ❜
❛ You won’t kill me out of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness. ❜
❛ I think you and I are destined to do this forever. ❜
❛ Sometimes we have to be steady, and give up the thing we want the most. ❜
❛ You’re making me angry. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry. ❜
❛ Big man in a suit of amour. Take that off, what are you? ❜
❛ They can’t be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. ❜
❛ But you’re a Superhero! They always get the girl, right? ❜
❛ Aren’t you curious about how I get around so fast? ❜
❛ That is why I show you my work! That is why you are here! ❜
❛ You have a knack for saving my life. I think I have a superhero stalker. ❜
❛ Remember? Your little “accident” in the laboratory…? ❜
❛ Why didn’t you kill me? I would’ve killed you in an instant. Answer me! ❜
❛ Remember to chisel that into my tombstone. ❜
❛ What happened to you? How did you become this? ❜
❛ No hard feelings, Point Break. You’ve got a mean swing. ❜
❛ Apparently I’m volatile, self-obsessed, and don’t play well with others. ❜
❛ You put those people together, you can’t expect what’s going to happen… ❜
❛ A hero? Like you? ❜
❛ Put on the suit. ❜
❛ Have you got a suit? ❜
❛ Superheroes? In New York? Give me a break! ❜
❛ The world has gotten even stranger than you already know. ❜
❛ We will not stand by as evil wipes out billions of innocent lives. ❜
❛ If we’re gonna work together you might wanna try trusting me a little bit. ❜
❛ I would be grateful to die surrounded by my friends. ❜
❛ If you kill me, you’re gonna miss the biggest score you’ve ever seen. ❜
❛ But everyone has a weakness. And a weakness can be leveraged. ❜
❛ My job is to keep you alive until you die. You understand that? ❜
❛ Devils don’t come from hell beneath us. No, they come from the sky. ❜
❛ Next time they shine your light in the sky, don’t go to it. ❜
❛ How many good guys are left? How many stayed that way? ❜
❛ Is it stealing if you steal from another thief? ❜
❛ Whatever you do, wherever you go, I will be watching you. ❜
❛ No matter how many times you save the world, it always manages to get back in jeopardy again. ❜
Driving (Me) Crazy

Request/Prompt(s): Ay eye mee, if you’re still doing your ficlet celebration (woooooo!!! 🎊 🎉 🥂), what about Bucky being surprised af when he’s in the car with you for the first time and realizes this tiny ass chick is a raging driver (is me. no shame).

Warnings: swearing

Word Count: 1057

A/N: Hahaah Nicole!!! Don’t be mean to my Bluetooth speaker! Here you go. J I skipped the queue to write this because it made me laugh.

Originally posted by pandasubaru

“I am not getting in that car,” Bucky insisted. He stood resolute with arms folded over his chest, positioned at least 5 feet away from your car. You rolled your eyes and shot a bored look to Sam as you leaned against the opened driver side door, flipping the keys around your finger.

“Man, you are a hundred years old, a war veteran, a POW, a stone cold assassin, and you’re not going to get in your girl’s car?” Sam prodded, leaning out of the back seat.

“After 100 years I’ve learned not to needlessly endanger my life,” he snapped, “but you enjoy the ride!”

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anonymous asked:

My main problem with LoK is the Avatar state, to be honest. In Last Airbender, the Avatar state was a last resort, almost undefeatable power, while in Korra it's just a small power boost. That said, the characters and the antagonists are amazing, and I love LoK to bits.

Hmm. 
I guess I hadn’t thought about it before, 
personally i think it has more to do with the differences between Aang and Korra. 

Aang is a pacifist, he is shown a lot as not wanting to really use extra force when he doesn’t have to. So while I could be wrong here I think it comes down to that Aang just never really uses his bending for fighting when he doesn’t have too. On top of that, his early experiences in the Avatar state weren’t really good ones?
1. He froze himself for a 100 years
2. He went into it after finding out about the destruction of his people
3. That general tried manipulating him into it by messing with Katara
4. After going through unlocking all his chakras, when he finally does get them all he almost gets killed
I think the reason it feels like the Avatar state was used as a last resort a lot more in airbender is because for Aang that was his literal, last resort. 
Even in Lok, his fight with Yakone, he doesn’t use the Avatar state to attack him, doesn’t use it until he takes away his bending. 

Now Korra, I’m pretty sure came out the womb ready to fight, by the time she arrives in republic city she has had years and years of training and was already this power house of a bender and hadn’t even learned to airbend or being able to tap into the avatar state. 
In Korra’s first scene of book 2, she uses the Avatar state to boost her speed so she can beat the the kids in a race and Tenzin gets upset about it. 
So I think it makes sense that Korra would figure out a way to integrate the Avatar state into her bending to give her a boost when she needs it. 

I guess for me I think it comes down to that Korra is a lot more liberal with her use of the Avatar state where Aang was more reserved and only used it when necessary 

The Older Man *smut*- Thomas Shelby

Request// Can you do a imagine of Tommy where the reader is younger than him? @yomairagotpb

Request// Would you consider doing a Tommy Shelby imagine where the reader is quite a bit younger than Tommy and a family friend that helps with the business killing. The reader doesn’t date or anything until Tommy finally professes his feelings and takes her virginity A bit rough Dirty smut pretty please

*You asked for smut and I’m about to hella deliver. Cover your eyes if you can’t handle dirty words! In all honesty, it’s my best attempt after a week of contemplation. Someone please teach me the secret to writing good smut!! I’m going to try to put out at least one more work before Friday because I’m getting my wisdom teeth taken out and no one would want to read anything I right then haha. xoxox*

Masterlist


Same time every week. Like clockwork. Tommy knew to have your pay ready and on his desk by noon every Wednesday so you could pick it up before going to the market. This had been ‘the usual’ for years, and it seemed you had fooled Thomas into even enjoying your momentary visits. Of course, all the men in the shop had if he were to be honest. There was only one notion that had kept him from lashing out passively in a jealous pique or even pursuing you further when he realized just how enamored he’d become with you: you were younger buy some extent, nearby 10 years.

It didn’t help that your family was one of very little the Shelbys could call friends because if a rendezvous were to come about, all secrets would come to light in the eyes of your mother and father. In truth, your position in the company was no longer what it used to be, though they didn’t need to know that. Your father had served in the war, and while he would never be able to walk again, you thanked the Lord everyday that he even came home, consumed at the time on how his older age than most boys he fought with would not excuse him from enemy fire. Your mother had worked in a factory while your dad was away, but to make ends meet, you took up a position at Shelby Company Ltd. the woman you knew as you own aunt Polly had offered you while her nephews were on the battlefront. When the war had ended and the boys had come home, you were sure you would be unemployed. In truth it had been a surprise to all how useful and imperative you became. The only catch was that you duties became more than just helping keep the books like when you were 14. Tommy had gotten you in on exporting malt whiskey to the United States and even ending a couple of the sad lives of those who fucked over the Peaky Blinders. Not that you would say so, but you liked to think of yourself as the first ‘peaky boy.’ Now you were a lone wolf, only ever stopping in when you were called and for your pay as well as weekly updates.

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YA'LL THIS HEADCANON THOUGH

i just had an a m a zing thought. HEAR ME OUT

what if after keith discovered he was galra, his traits start kicking in? i’m assuming that his galra heritage is dominant as fu ck

it’s small things at first, like his ears start popping out and his eyes go golden from time to time

until it gets kinda weird and also hella confusing

one day lance wakes up and showers and all that, ready to train

he opens his door and shrieks so loudly it has the entire team running to his room

cause right in front of lance’s door is a giant fucking elephant-like alien dead on its side. it looks like it was cleanly killed, cause it didn’t have any excess blood or jagged cuts

everyone freaks out with lance who wants that thing away from him as soon as possible

they work fast and soon it’s gone

and lance turns, only to see a really red keith. like. really red. redder than his armor red

keef’s ears are twitched in agitation, and lance resists the urge to coo and stroke them because keith’s eyes are going golden - which is a bad sign

“kei - ”

lance doesn’t even get to finish his question because keith just growls really loudly before stomping away

a few hours later hunk goes to lance and asks, “did you and keith have a fight again? he’s been sulking in the training room and hasn’t stopped growling”

and lance is all “what?? no???? is he okay?????”

the next day lance wakes up and goes to his door a lot more cautiously…. to see a box in front of it

he opens it and gapes widely, what the fuck???

in it is about ten different gems, all unlike any other color lance has ever seen, and he cooes over them, before going back to his room and careully tucking the box away

lance gets to the dining room and sits down. surprisingly keith is the last to join the ohers, stumbling through the door

and everybody notices how his hair is ragged and the heavy bags under his eyes, but the most porminent thing is the giant, goofy grin on his face

lance goes red (holy shit keith’s smile is what he lives for) as keith sits down beside him, tired and worn but very very happy

the next day there was another gift. this time, really pretty and silky robes

of course lance squeals over them and yanks them on immediately, twirling in front of his mirror and loving it

he likes these gifts and all, but he wonders who they’re all from???

fast forward about two weeks later and lance’s room is overflowing with gifts, all more lovely and extravagant than the last

but lance is more worried about keith - cause although the red paladin is now constantly grinning and purring, he’s also always very tired and exhausted

it gets to the point they have to address the issue

they all gather up in the control room and ask keith what’s going on

when he doesn’t answer, pidge goes, “where have you been visiting all these nights? don’t think i haven’t noticed red missing from her hanger”

and keith goes red but he’s still silent

they all ask him one at a time, until finally it’s lance’s turn. he breathes and says, “keith, buddy, please. just tell us?”

and keith looks at him with wide eyes before nodding slowly. they all hold their breath as he finally says, “… i was gathering.”

“gathering?” allura asks. “what for?”

“i don’t know!” keith spouts. “i just - i had to, okay???”

and pidge lights up as she gets her computer and starts typing. “aha! i knew it - i mean, not really, but i had a suspicion.”

“the galra are a very affectionate and loyal race,” pidge reads. “they often express romantic interest in another by courting; typically, courting is a way to prove that they are worthy of the other’s affections. it starts with usually a good hunt, to show that they are able to provide the other’s needs. from then on, they continue to lavish the other with beautiful gifts and trinkets until their courtship is accepted.”

silence.

then explosion.

“you WERE COURTING LANCE - ”

“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL US???”

but all that mattered was lance had gone increasingly redder and redder, with keith’s ears flattening to his head as he waits for lance’s reaction

it’s not the one he’s expecting

“you… got all of those… for me?” lance whispers in awe, staring at keith with wide eyes

keith hesitates. then he nods

and lance surges forward, pressing kisses frantically all over keith’s face

and keith is purring, l o u dl y, as he grabs lance and pulls him closer

“that’s - amazing - i can’t - believe - love you - so much - ” lance whisers between kisses

finally, they pause to take breath, and keith says, “i still haven’t given you your last gift.”

keith slowly takes lance’s hand and presses it to his chest. and keith smiles, and it’s sweet and beautiful and go r g eous as he says, “my heart. but you’ve always had it to begin with.”

“um, guys, we’re still here” pidge gags loudly

turns out that keith’s genes had kicked in and his instincts had made him court lance, whom he had been in love with since the garrison. it was why he was always so tired - he had been up all those nights getting lance’s gifts

it’s also why he was so upset during the first day; he had taken lance’s shock as rejection

of course, keith’s stubborn so he continued courting lance anyway

bonus:

“hey, pidge?”

“hm?”

“when are you going to tell the others you helped keith sneak in and out?”

“shh……”

Elopement - Jason Todd x Reader

Bullets rang around you as you sprinted down a corridor towards a closing metal door. You dove through, rolling to your feet on the other side. Glancing over your shoulder, you smiled when you saw the men chasing you disappeared behind the closing door. The door sealed behind you.

“I’m in,” you spoke into the comlink as you surveyed the room. Finding a control panel, you attempted to hack the building’s computer system.

A chuckle sounded from the other end of the comlink. “I never doubted you for a second.”

“Sure you didn’t, Lover-boy,” you teased, grinning at the chuckles buzzing in your ear. “How are you doing with the mercenaries?” 

“Oh, we’re having a party out here,” he replied. The faint sound of gunshots echoed through the com. You frowned when you didn’t get another answer.

“Jason?” The panic made your voice crack. Time stopped as you waited for a reply.

“I’m still here, Sweetheart.” You sighed as Jason’s husky voice filled your ear. Even after all this time, your heart still fluttered at the sound. “One of these idiots just shot himself.”

You snickered, finishing your hacking. Sticking a flash drive into the terminal, you started downloading the information. You and Jason had accepted a contract to collect data on Black Mask’s movements through the western part of the United States. The two of you were currently in one of Black Mark’s main warehouses in Las Vegas. “I’ve started the download.”

“Good,” Jason grunted. The sound of a punch came through the com. “I might need your help out here. More mercenaries showed up.”

“I’ll come when I can,” you replied. You hacked into the security cameras to find out where Jason was. When you found him, you winced at the number of new mercenaries attacking Jason. He was holding them off, but you knew he would need your help to take them down. 

The terminal beeped, the download was finished. You took the flash drive out, slipping it safely into your pocket. Taking out your own gun, you shot the terminal to erase your tracks. Once it was destroyed, the sealed door reopened to reveal the men who you had trapped outside. They raised their guns at you.

“Nice to see you again, Boys,” you greeted cheerfully, swinging into action. The men were down in five seconds flat. You sprinted back down the corridor towards a glass window. Shooting out the glass with your gun, you leaped through the window to land a flying kick to one of the mercenaries attacking Jason.

“Hello Sweetheart, it’s nice of you to drop in,” Jason flirted as you joined him in the battle. The two of you fought seamlessly together. 

“I was in the neighborhood,” you mused, punching a mercenary out cold. You flipped over Jason to perform a high kick on another one. 

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dating yoongi

Originally posted by yoonmin

  • yeah, yoongi’s fucking grumpy
  • but that doesn’t meant he’d be grumpy towards you
  • no no no
  • i think yoongi would actually be really caring
  • but not in the traditional sense of the word
  • don’t expect too much kissing and pda and that type of shit
  • he’s not the type to hug you out in public or hold hands as you walk down the street or kiss you as you wait in line to get your coffee to go, he’s just not into that
  • he never understood why people have the need to do those things
  • when there was a time and place for those things, somewhere in private
  • i think he’s more of the type to express his care with small actions 
  • however, his way of caring is something you would have to get used to
  • at first, you’d think he wasn’t that into you
  • you’d be like why isn’t he hugging me??? i want to hug him all the time
  • i want to suck his face off 24/7, why doesn’t he want that??
  • what am i doing wrong??? 
  • he’s literally perfect and i don’t want to fuck this up !?!?
  • he wouldn’t hug you as much as you wanted him to
  • he wouldn’t want to suck your face off 24/7
  • he wouldn’t be all touchy feely like the guys you usually go for
  • you’d get all concerned about it and you’d start thinking he really wasn’t into you
  • but with time you’d learn to appreaciate his signs of affection 
  • like making you coffee in the morning, giving you his hoodies to wear, sending you random texts about his day
  • “i swear to god i’m going to kill one of them if they don’t grow up”
  • “these fools won’t stop messing around”
  • “i fucking hate dance practice with them”
  • “they made me TWERK”
  • “how much time would i serve for six murders?” 
  • “and would you wait for me until i got out?”
  • “sweden is beautiful, we should come here together some day”
  • and you’d know that he thought of you and wanted to share parts of his day with you and that, in his head, that was equal to expressing his emotions in physical ways
  • also you’d live for his late night phone calls
  • he’d call at three am, hoping you were still up
  • “i just finished producing this song, you have to hear it, i promise you’ll love it” *screeching*
  • “i’m done filming for the day, just checking up on you”
  • he’d always show you he cares when he’d call 
  • he’d call just to hear your voice before he goes to bed
  • you’d talk for a minute or two
  • but you’d know it means a lot to him, and that it was his way of being intimate
  • and he’d say things that mean i love you in yoongi language
  • like “did you get home safe”
  • “were there any problems at school today”
  • “don’t catch a cold, wear something warm when you go out”
  • “don’t forget to take your passport”
  • “i’ll call you in the morning so you don’t sleep through your alarm”
  • “don’t drink too much, and if you do, make sure you eat a lot”
  • {crying}
  • i said no touchy feely stuff
  • but don’t think that includes cuddling  !!!
  • he likes to sleep
  • and he loves to sleep with you
  • your head on his chest makes him fall asleep a lot faster, the sound of your breathing lulls him to sleep on cold afternoons as you snuggle up to him covered in blankets
  • he loves it when he’s cold and your body warms him up
  • he always runs his fingers through your hair and plays with the hair on the nape of your neck, and that always calms you down when you’re upset
  • you don’t get as much physical attention every day
  • but when you’re upset
  • yoongi would go all out to make you feel better
  • if someone pissed you off, he’d be very angry and would always offer to talk to them and sort things out for you, or jokingly, he’d offer to beat them up
  • or he’d playfully say he’ll write a diss track on them and you’d know he didn’t mean it, but it was still cute
  • and when he’d see the idea is making you feel better, he’d come up with random diss lines against the person who upset you that you’d end up crying from laughter at his rap lines
  • and if you were sad, yoongi would be EXTRA thoughtful and considerate
  • because he’s someone who knows what that feels like
  • that is exactly why he doesn’t get too touchy feely and why he always seems distant
  • he’s lost in his own world, he has so many thoughts about everything and he likes to keep them to himself
  • he likes to keep his private things private
  • and you’re the most private thing in his life
  • he doesn’t want people to see him kissing you or holding you or doing anything
  • that’s reserved for your eyes only
  • he’s a perfectionist
  • he wants to be perfect to his fans, to his audience, to his band members, but also to you
  • and when he feels like he’s not perfect in something (never!!) he feels bad and shuts everyone off and ends up thinking about the thing he messed up
  • and he ends up in this circle of self-hatred and self-loathing and then pity, and then hatred because of the pity and it doesn’t go away easily, and the only way it does is through his music
  • so when you’d feel down, he’d do everything in his power to make you feel better
  • because he never wants anyone, let alone you, to feel the way he feels when he feels down
  • and those moments when he’d open up to you and tell you about what’s bothering him, share his deepest thoughts with you, let you be the first person to listen to his songs, to his most personal thoughts, worries and desires, those moments would let you know just how much you mean to him
  • and that’s why you would never be unhappy with him
  • even if he didn’t kiss you and hug you all the time
  • it wouldn’t matter
  • he’d do those things when it was most important, when you’d feel down
  • and you could always count on him to make you feel better, no matter where he is or what he’s doing
  • and you’d always try to do the same for him
  • even if you knew most of his problems are in his head
  • and you couldn’t really control them
  • you’d try your best
  • anyway
  • i think he’d be a great boyfriend
  • caring and thoughtful and really funny
  • because his sarcasm and the realness he serves all the time are fucking great
  • and he’s the most relatable person ever
  • and he’s a musical genius
  • plus he’s hot
  • that concludes this late night thirst for boyfriend material yoongi
Prompt List

1.“Fancy seeing you here.” “I work here.”

2.“Can I buy you a drink?”

3.“Right now, I don’t know if I want to kiss you or shove you off a bridge” “Can I pick?”

4.“You know what they say, panicking burns a shit-ton of calories.” “Who even says that?” “Me. Just now.”

5.“If I go through with this, I die. If I don’t, we all die.”

6.“No, no, you do NOT want me navigating. I’ll accidentally navigate us off a cliff.”

7.“Is that blood?” “No?” “That’s not a question you’re supposed to answer with another question.”

8.“This is all your fault.” “I hope so.”

9.“I’d rather be pecked to death by a flock of hummingbirds.”

10.“You have no power over me.” “You sure about that?”

11.“Hold on, you died.” “Yeah, well it didn’t stick.”

12.“Excuse me! I was a superhero for ten whole minutes!” “And in that time you got kidnapped and we had to come to the rescue”

13.“I am way too sober for this.”

14.“You’re not as evil as people think you are.” “No. I’m much worse.”

15.“Why do you keep risking your life? To prove a point?” “Yes.”

16.“That’s disgusting. You’re lucky you’re cute.”

17.“Did you just… agree with me?” “Oh, I wish I could take-““Nope! You said it! No take-backs!”

18.“I think I’m having a feeling. How do I make it stop?”

19.“This plan of yours is going to get us killed. Of course, I’m in.”

20.“Don’t mind me, I’ll just be in the corner having another existential crisis.”

21.“Can you please go be stupid somewhere that’s away from me?”

22.“What are you afraid of?” “You.”

23.“It’s a good thing you’re cute when you’re angry.”

24.“Are you SURE I can’t punch him in the face?” “Yes.” “What if I break his nose a little?”

25.“Stop that!” “Stop what?” “Doing that thing with your face when you’re happy. It’s making me nauseous.”

26.“You don’t strike me as a professional criminal.” “That’s what makes me so good at it.”

27.“It’s a long story” “You conned me into thinking you were dead for eleven months. I have time.”

28.“You can’t just turn into a bat and fly away when you don’t want to deal with things!” “Watch me!”

29.“I don’t give a damn.” “You give so many damns they’re visible from SPACE.”

30.“I’m trying to have a serious conversation with you!” “And I’m trying to subtly avoid it!”

31.“Unless I screw this up again, I’m going to marry you.” “Well you better not mess this up”

32.“Wait, you’re a superhero?” “How do you not know? My face is literally on the news on a weekly basis.” “I’m in grad school. I won’t have time to follow popular media until I finish my thesis. You’re lucky I’ve carved out some non-existent free time to date you.”

33.“I’m just really tired of watching you get thrown off the tops of buildings”

34.“Hey, I didn’t kill anyone today!” “What do you want? A gold star.”

35.“I feel like I’m being stabbed.” “How do you even know what it feels like to be stabbed?”

36.“Whether you believe in me or not, I will continue to exist.”

37.“We’re leaving.” “But they have a lobster tank in their basement.”

38.“Take my hand.” “Why?” “I’m trying to ask you to marry me, so take my damn hand!”

39.“I don’t care where I sleep, as long as it’s with you.”

40.“You’re a psychopath.” “I prefer creative.”

41.“Show me your scars.” “But… why?” “I want to see how many times you needed me and I wasn’t there.”

42.“You look…” “Beautiful, I know. Can we move on?”

43.“She’s my best friend. That hasn’t changed.” “It’s clear your feelings for her has.”

44.“I saved your life.” “You pushed me off a building.”

45.“How do we keep getting into these situations?” “Eleven years of friendship and I still don’t know.”

46.“I thought you forgot about me.” “Never.”

47.“I’m fine.” “You don’t look fine.” “Then stop looking.”

48.“You gotta stop doing that.” “What?” “Saying things that make me wanna kiss you.”

49.“I want to go home.” “And I want to go to the moon. It ain’t happening sweetheart. Time to accept that.”

50.“What now?” “I don’t know. I thought the jump would kill us.”

51.“I think that you’re not as dark as you want people to believe.”

52.“Sometimes, memories are the worst torture.”

53.“I hate you.” “Why? I’m lovely.”

54.“You really have no clue who I am?” “You’d think the confused looks and blank stare would have answered that for you.”

55.“Why are they afraid of you?”

56.“Literally everything about this is illegal.”

57.“You love her don’t you?” “Was it that obvious?”

58.“Why me?” “Because you saw me when I was invisible.”

59.“I was just kind of hoping that you’d, y’know…. fall in love with me.”

60.“It’s okay. You don’t have to love me.”

61.“You know, no one bothered me this much when I was dead.”

62.“Nope. I can’t go to hell. Satan still has a restraining order against me.”

63.“Only a fool would fall in love with someone as deadly as me.”

64.“I’d know that smirk anywhere.”

The Signs as Things Said in 13 Reasons Why

Aries - “Dream big, they say. Shoot for the stars. Then they lock us away for 12 years, tell us where to sit, when to pee and what to think. Then when we turn 18, and even though we’ve never had an original thought, we have to make the most important decision of our lives.”

Taurus - “Favorite kind of music, ‘obscure indie bands’ ” *Tony’s little nod*

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Don't sass the Angel of Death

The characters in this are Azrael the Angel of Death (played by Y) and Dareios who is possessed by a snake demon/deity that calls itself Leviathan (played by me). Dareios is immortal thanks to Leviathan, and Azrael doesn’t like immortal humans, so Y and I are trying to figure out how they would interact.

Y: Okay but Azrael’s blades usually conceal themselves as scissors imagine a typical teenager in a hoodie (Azrael’s human appearance) threathening Dareios with scissors. I wouldn’t be sure whether to laugh or call the cops.

Me: “Well as long as they don’t run with them” - Dareios

Y: I think that’s gonna be the least of your concerns somehow buddy

Y: Honestly tho I know for fact that the first thing Azrael says to Dareios is “the fuck are you”.

Y: (I have this idea that Azrael is the only angel who swears)

(here’s where we switched to actually being IC or OOC)

Dareios: “I could ask you the same question, but I already know the answer: rude.”

Y: OH SNAP

Me: I love it when Dareios goes all sassy.

Azrael: “Politeness gets you nowhere, certainly not when facing death.”

Y: But seriously Azrael looks like a moody teenager so I doubt that would be taken seriously

Dareios: “Assuming I will answer your question…”

Dareios/Leviathan (talking at the same time): “…Which of us did you ask?”

Azrael: “Cursed be the English language. The ‘you’ was plural.”

Y: ‘Cursed be the English language’? Who says that???

Me: Azrael, clearly

Dareios: “That is a very old-fashioned phrase for a kid like you”

Azrael: “Now who’s the rude one. Show your elders some respect.”

Leviathan: “Excuse you!?” (pretending to be insulted)

Azrael: (snickers) “You clearly haven’t seen me before. Understandable, since you’re immortal, you don’t know what Death looks like.”

Dareios: “I know what Death looks like, but it never holds me long enough for me to register its true appearance.”

Azrael: “Well now you do. And now I have to correct the natural order.” (takes out scissors)

Dareios: “Going to cut my thread of life, or whatever it’s called?”

Azrael: “Oh no. I take offense to immortal humans, I’m going to get up close and personal with this.” (separates the blades of the scissors and turns them into a dagger and a sword)

Dareios: “Well, you definitely shouldn’t run with those.” (makes magic sword appear out of thin air)

Azrael: “I’ve been doing this since the dawn of life. You should be worried about yourself.”

Y: Dawn of life, is that even a thing??

Me: I guess it is

Dareios: "I’d like to see you try. Maybe I will stay dead this time. I doubt it, though.“

Azrael: (suddenly holding the dagger to Dareios’ throat) “Don’t patronize me, WORM.”

Leviathan: “I take offense to that.”

Azrael: (steps back) “And I take offense to you. We’re even now, huh?”

Leviathan: “Guess so.”

Y: Okay but (her other two characters) standing on the sideline watching these two duke it out

Leviathan: “Question. Can an Angel of Death die?”

Azrael: “Are you an idiot? Of course I can’t. If I died, no one else would. The natural order would be a mess.”

Leviathan: “Another question. Do you think you’d be able to kill a god?”

Azrael: “I’ve done it before. The real question is; is it your time to go? I know the human passed his long ago. That must be corrected.”

Leviathan: “My dear host will not pass his time until I allow him to.”

Azrael: “Unfortunately for you, you’re not in charge of either fate or destiny. All I have to do is wrench control from you for just a second. Then he’s gone.”

Leviathan: “Gone for how long?”

Azrael: “Forever. He’ll be dead.”

Leviathan: “Will he? He has died thousands of times before, and I brought him back every time.”

Azrael: “This time is different. You haven’t dealt with me in person before. When I close the gates, they won’t open for anyone.”

Leviathan: “I’d like to see that happening.”

Azrael: “I told you, didn’t I? You’re not the one in charge. I am.” (reveals wings)

Leviathan: “Oh, really? Who is stronger, an Angel or a God? Time to find out~”

Azrael: “Such arrogance. I was here before you, and I will be here after you. Those words, I’ve heard them before. Yet I am here, and they are not.”

Leviathan: “Were you here before me? Well, I suppose you were in this exact location before I was, but that’s not the point.”

Me: Leviathan no. Stop sassing the angel of death.

Azrael: “The moment life was invented, I was there, ready to claim it. Such is the natural law of things.”

Leviathan: “Would that make you the first or the second creature alive?”

Azrael: “Second after God. I was a force of nature at first. Then I chose to serve Him.”

Leviathan: “That makes sense. Now, I guess we have talked enough…”

Azrael: “You are a fine conversation partner, I must say. Not many people ask me things other than 'why me?’.”

Leviathan: “I know the answer to that already, so I don’t need to ask. Now, are you going to kill me or not?”

Azrael: “Yes.” (runs him through with the sword)

Me: Well that escalated quickly.

Waiting For You

Author: @dylan-ohbrien
Pairing: Mitch Rapp x Reader
Wordcount: 3,565
Warnings: Language and allllll the smut
A/N: So after watching the American Assassin trailer, I, like many others, was shook to the core with all the shirtlessness, sexiness, perfectness, that Dylan brought to my little computer screen. All of that inspired me to do this little oneshot thing. I haven’t read the books so I don’t really know anything about his character, this was just my interpretation based kind of off what I’d seen in the trailer. Anywho, I hope you guys like it! Let me know what you think!

Keep reading

“Cry Followup”, or “See A Doctor! The Musical”

I got sad. A doctor recommended that I go off my anxiety meds because they might be interfering with a bunch of other health issues. I did. It wasn’t good.

I tapered off for months and dealt with the withdrawal symptoms. When they were gone, I felt ok for a few weeks. Then I was easily irritated and sometimes angry. Then weird feelings started to creep in. I guess it was just dread. Maybe it was weird to just be feeling anything after being numbed on meds for so long. I started crying watching movies sometimes or thinking about whatever the fuck. I started getting really sad. Eventually I would cry everyday, sometimes for multiple sessions. It’s strange to think back on that now that I’m safely numbed to fuck again.

My grandfather had died about 8 months earlier and I thought I had emotionally exhausted that, but now it was back and I dwelt on it constantly. I thought of dying with an urgency that I couldn’t distract myself from. I thought of everyone I knew dying. It felt like time was an illusion and it wouldn’t be long until I’m standing beside their open coffins, reflecting on how quickly time had passed and now they’re gone and I’d wasted time not spending more time with them.

Most days I’d just wake up and lie there for hours. I’d try to look at things on my phone to try to distract myself. Snapchat was fun for that. Christ, so was Miitomo. I wouldn’t get any work done. It was difficult to focus and overcome the feeling in my gut of being pulled down and the constant present terror feelings of death and knowing this whole experience will be gone some day, but before that, I’ll watch everyone I know leave too. For a long time, I don’t think I really connected that it was my absence of meds that was doing this to me. I thought maybe it was just circumstances and some kind of Holmes-Rahe scale thing where a bunch of life events happening at once were stacking and compounding my depression feelings. There was no way to win against it and this kind of thing encourages you to not to the things that will typically pull you out of a depression. It makes you want to seclude yourself more and work on further diminishing your self-worth mentally. Instead of seeing friends or doing activities you enjoy, you convince yourself that you’re a burden to them, they don’t really want to see you anyway, and that something bad is going to happen if you go out and do anything. For so many fucking days I just laid there. That makes your depression even worse; your lack of productivity frustrates you and makes you hate yourself. All that wasted time boils your living asshole. It’s a paralysis and you don’t know why you can’t break out of it. You can’t just go into the other room and sit at your computer and do your work. Brains are incredible. Just a bit of absence from a certain chemical changes everything. Of course, you tell yourself things like this, that it’s not really you and that it’s just a biological ineptitude temporarily and that everything will be fine soon enough, but that doesn’t help at all.

That’s the other thing: you don’t feel like this will ever end. This is who you are now. A fucking shrivelled terrified cryhole. I did feel terror quite a few times during all this. It usually gets you when you wake up or try to go to sleep. Everything is still and You are going to fucking die someday, sooner than you think and You have wasted every moment of your life so far blast in your mind and your heart pounds, you can barely breathe, and you might even suddenly groan as panic waves hit your brain in an instant. There’s a terror in knowing there’s no relief from this; that all of these things are true and for some reason you believed the illusion your whole life and weren’t always in the perfect terror about it that you are now. Still, you beg for that trick to come back, to be able to put this mindset away and believe in the stupid shit we tell ourselves just to keep existing in some kind of calm. All these thoughts keep assaulting you with some kind of biological urgency, like you need to figure this problem out immediately or you die. This is what being on chemicals to help your brain for years and then suddenly going off them is like. Your body doesn’t know what the fuck. It’s weird to not give a shit about any of this and then suddenly imperatively have to give a shit about it and be unable to escape it. Even now when I’m in the clear, I still feel its background noise. Maybe I always will from now on. This whole thing has been a Paul on the road to Damascus type ordeal.

I fucking cried watching the new X-Files episodes, my dude. Probably during each one. That’s what it was fucking like. Imagine being in your late ass twenties and something in the X-Files makes you cry because you think of a squandered opportunity, or what you should or shouldn’t have done as a kid, or wishing you had put more effort into certain relationships with family or friends. It just finds anything to grab onto and get you with. You just have a dragging feeling constantly present and looking for things to attach to and convince you you’re sad about. Frankly, it’s fucking annoying. I cried one time because a nintendo phone app was enthusiastic about sharing my character’s picture with others. Just the fact that someone would have an interest in who I am and treat me like a normal person and want to share something about me with other terrible avatars made me cry as I was playing this thing and trying to take a shit. It made me think about my own self-worth and how long I thought there was no reason anyone should give a fuck. Cripe, one time I was almost screaming crying about my best friend who died when we were 11. It was like a fresh wound again and I was lying facedown on my bed wailing like an asshole. Depression can fuck with you.

So, this got pretty bad and I decided I had to see my GP about it. This can become a battle in itself, because past a certain point, you are convinced you aren’t worth the effort and that you’re a burden to have to deal with, and someone else could use that time to see the doctor instead. It gives you any reason to turn yourself down. I cried right away talking to my doctor. All this is really weird to reflect on; I was an entirely different person then. It was like a frantic sadness, an inability to just hold your shit together for even a few minutes. The impending terror was really pressing; a constant urgent anxiety that something bad is going to happen really soon, or that I’m about to get a call that someone I know just died. The doctor recommended seeing a therapist and going back on meds. Now I remember that the reason I finally did something was because my neighbour’s son killed himself. Fuck, that really bothered me. Hearing about any death at all was bad enough, but I think that week I was reading about Edgar Allan Poe’s death and then Vincent Van Gogh’s, and I just got really fixated on vividly imagining their final moments. I think there were others, too. See? Just a stupid thing to waste your time on but in the moment, you think this will help for some reason. Maybe the gravity of that kind of thing hooks you and you can’t help but look into it. So when my neighbour’s son also committed suicide, that was a pretty strong blow. I hadn’t even talked to the guy in over ten years, but I couldn’t help but fixate on having seen his father maybe 3 days prior as he joked in my mom’s backyard and borrowed a ladder. Now his life was ruined and the son he struggled to try to get mental help his whole life had killed himself. He was only 37 and he had a son. I think I spent a few days of weeping out my stupid ass over this, then made the decision to see my doctor.

I started seeing my therapist and cried within 6 minutes of entering his office. I wish I went to see a talk doctor when I was recommended it as a teenager. It’s good shit. Beyond that, I started seeing my friends again. Before this, I think 2 years had passed between us spending time together. I had talked myself into feeling like they were better off without me anyway and had their own real friends and lives that I didn’t have anything to do with. I started to exercise and even just take walks around the block. Sometimes, if I was just lying awake staring at the ceiling, I’d get up and go for a run. I started being able to work on videos again and looked forward to it. Thinking back on it now, I realize I kept streaming during the whole time. That would become the only thing I’d do or look forward to for most of this stretch. SO THANKS IF YOU LOOKED AT MY TERRIBLE STREAMS DURING THIS ERA I WAS QUITE WOUNDED AND I’M HOPEFUL THAT I WASN’T TREMENDOUSLY OBVIOUS ABOUT THIS, YOU HELPED KEEP ME STABLE WATCHING ME PLAY WITH CHILDREN’S TOYS. Beyond this, I’d just sleep until the afternoon and try to find a way to kill time until the streams started. This is why there were even less videos than usual. I was sad.

So, these things helped pull me out of the shit. A lot of it is self-examination and discovering why you feel this way in the first place. I’ve talked to my therapist about whether or not this whole thing was because of being on meds for so long and then going off them and feeling a withdrawal, or if that’s who I am underneath the medication.  He said that it is probably both, but more that that’s who I am. Fuck. He categorized this as a major depressive episode. It was weird to just hear the words. That is the kind of thing that happens to people in their mid-30s in office jobs who are getting shit on by everything in their lives. I guess it can also make you feel like a diva asshole; that you feel you’re so important that you had to have this major crisis about yourself. Writing this makes me realize how stupid it is to think like this, but that’s the kind of trap you get put into. Anyway, let me emphasize how important it is to see a therapist if you are depressed. Do it. It can change everything. Also talk to a doctor and see if meds are part of your solution. See a doctor. Do not just let it go. This is like if you had cancer and you just wanted to wait it out or hoped it would get better on its own. A lot of people let it go until it’s overwhelming and consumes them completely and just kill themselves to end the pain. Don’t!

I got better. I went on meds and in just a few weeks I made a drastic improvement. Plus the therapy, and plus feeling like I was doing anything with my life again. I hear a lot about hesitation to go on meds because you feel like they may change the foundation of who you ever are. This doesn’t happen. For me, it made me feel more free to be who I felt like I really was. That said, it may numb your emotions if you are a person who typically feels a lot of things. Just talk to a doctor about any concerns you have and don’t let these build up and become reasons you don’t get help for yourself. You are worth it. The doctor isn’t angry to have to deal with you. If it will cost what you can’t afford, don’t let that become an excuse not to do it. Save up or find a way to make it work. Again, it’s like if you couldn’t afford cancer treatments so you just let it kill you instead of finding out how you can make the situation work financially. What you’re dealing with is serious! Do something about it!

I almost forgot to mention that a lot of getting better was having something to look forward to. Knowing I’d see my friends and we’d have a good time was part of it. Another was spending all of my fucking money to go to as many conventions as I could. They were something I enjoyed in the past but didn’t bother with much anymore, so I decided to get back into them. It was the best choice. Thanks for coming to drink a lot of beers and talk shit if I saw you at a PAX or TwitchCon or Magfest! They were sincerely some of the best times of my life. Knowing that it wouldn’t be long until I’d be at another convention helped a lot with otherwise feeling complete dread. The power of giving yourself something great to look forward to is really strong! Do it! Find things you like and make time for them. Reward yourself! At one point, I got into a really unbalanced lifestyle and would spend maybe 60 or 70 hours a week editing videos and I burned myself out to shit. All I would think about was the job and let my health and relationships go to shit. You’re not supposed to do that. Give yourself good things and make it a habit. Anyway, PAX East soon, my man.

When I wrote my last crypost, a lot of people responded it it. I was in a daze for the rest of that day as I heard from a mountain of individuals. A lot of you deal with issues like this and a lot of you feel hopeless about it. It’s fucked up! This is your life! You’re entitled to a good one! Doing something about it will take a lot less than you may think, and will help you in a lot more ways and probably faster than you may think. A lot of you also said since that you’ve decided to finally get help. So yeah motherfucker I had a cool cry about your messages several times. What was also helpful was anonymous tumblr questions saying they got help so others could see your experiences and know I’m not just yelling out my dick about this. Thanks! You helped people!

Ok I think I have to cut this short now, it got late and I try not to stay awake until fucking 7 AM these days. I feel like I missed a few of the main points I wanted to make but by now I think you get the point that you can feel like you are going to face total annihilation within the next few moments and still get back to normal in very little time. I almost just wrote “Hopefully talking about my own cringe-ass experience helped you with…” and so forth to end this on a light-hearted self-shitting, but that again is part of the problem. Feeling as if your issues are embarrassing, not worthy, juvenile, or to be written off as not serious is no good. I know we joke about this kind of thing to help deal with it, but don’t feel that way for real. AGAIN, YOU’RE WORTH IT. YOU’RE GOOD! YOU’RE WORTH DOING WHATEVER IT TAKES TO FEEL NOT FUCKED UP! GO! 


Go!

anonymous asked:

I like Mary. I think she's awesome. I don't see why she has to be evil.

Oh, boy, okay.

Listen you can like Mary all you want – I loved her too before the fucked up her entire story arc – but her entire arc was building up to be a villain, and a badass one that was going to go down with a fight. 

I’m REALLY not trying to be pedantic here, Nonny, but asks like this force me to pull out receipts, all of which I’m sure you’re not going to read, because who likes to be proved wrong, but I digress. I always end up sounding more harsh than I am when all I want to do is educate you on my perspective and what the narrative is teaching us.

THAT’S Why she’s a villain. When a character kills the title character of a show, they are coded as the bad guy unless they do a redemption arc that actually is a redemption.

Mary had NO redemption arc AT ALL. Even in S4, Mary is STILL manipulating and emotionally abusing Sherlock and John against each other with her fucking creepy-assed DVDs and her belittling of John in T6T. She still runs off to go do her little assassin things and still lied and manipulated everyone. And I know the argument is going to come up, but Mary’s gunshot was NOT a redemption. A redemption arc has the ex-villain doing a good deed and being genuinely sorry for their past actions. Not ONCE Mary has ever apologized for any of the shit she put everyone through. All of it was a plan, especially if she had creepy DVDs made FAIRLY RECENTLY (you can tell because of the hair style) to send out to people. Also:

YOU ARE EVIL IF YOU ACTIVELY OR POSTHUMOUSLY TELL SOMEONE TO GO KILL THEMSELVES.

That and Mary’s entire death scene was RIDICULOUS and completely contradicted EVERY rule that was established in this universe only 2 episodes prior on how characters die.

Nonny, Mary’s character arc is one I have been passionate about for many years, even before I was a Johnlocker, because her character was fascinating to me, and helped me understand the psychology and make sense of events that were happening in my life at the time. Right up until TAB, Mary was being coded as the next Moriarty. For some reason or another, Mofftiss decided to turn her into an “assassin with an heart of gold” and failed spectacularly.

If Mary truly was good, she WOULD HAVE TOLD JOHN FROM THE BEGINNING WHO SHE WAS, OR AT LEAST TOLD SHERLOCK SHE NEEDED HELP. HLV would have not played out as it did. Instead deciding that killing Sherlock was her only option so that she could continue to manipulate John, since she knew he was most malleable when he was grieving Sherlock.

You can read Mary’s character however you want, I could care less… well okay apparently I do because of this reply… But please, seriously consider that what became of her character really made no goddamned sense to the narrative arc the built for her and quite frankly really lazy writing. Just because she is a woman, doesn’t mean that she is nice and sweet and not abusive. Excusing her of her brand of emotional abuse and manipulation is really sexist.

People thought my mother was a nice person, too.