kids words

  • Jake: Sakes alive! I recon you must be entrepreneurial alternate macrocosm bro or somesuch! This alt universe malarkey whatsit sure is a doozy. Pleasure to meet you i've been on tenterhooks too make your forthcoming acquaintance! This is simply the dickens, i am preposterously overzealous, you seem akin to a benign fellow. Sorry to bedevil you with preposterous infinitesimal botherations, not to assail you. I'll be bequeathing you your personal space lickity split. Dirk always did verbalize about his puzzlebuster bro and i would detest to besmirch the stider designation. This is just as splendid as a huckleberry. Enough of the bravado, my name is jake!
  • Dave, crying: i have no idea what youre saying
To put this in more perspective: love and hate sit on opposite ends of the same spectrum.
So yes, love and hate are the same thing. Passion

AU where instead of going to Samwell, Jack starts a widely successful Publicly Broadcast show for children.

Jack learns that he is great with kids after coaching them for a little over two years. Moreover, kids are good with Jack. There is no pressure to be anything other than who he is.


It all starts with a local news program doing a fluff piece on Jack Zimmermann’s coaching ability. But then it turned into something completely different when Jack skated onto camera and started to introduce every single one of his kids and what was special about them. He was…really enchanting actually. He didn’t ever really talk down to them. Jack just treated them as a tiny friend. 

They ARE his tiny friends, but that’s not the point. 

The footage they got of “snack time” was really the best. Imagine a good 16 kids piled around this massive man teaching them the best way to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. 

 It should have been obvious that a local channel would contact him. It still surprises Jack. They want him to host a show? Why? Everyone always teased him about how impersonable he was during interviews. Is it because he’s Jack Zimmermann’s son? Or Alicia’s? 

Jack asks all of these questions to his mother and she just laughs. “You made a PB&J interesting to 16 kids just by being you”

Jack figures it wouldn’t hurt to give it a shot. 

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY, @foreversinninghoe <3<3<3<3

Ily loads!!! I hope you’ve had an amazing day and enjoy these dumb kids being dumb<3 You’ve definitely become a quick and close friend of mine over the past year (??? or longer?? im so oblivious to time periods) and I’m so happy to class you as a best friend of mine :)

Love you loads, and I hope everything’s amazing<3

ship whatever you want, as long as it’s not real

Whispers to the side that means fictional people, not real ones.

don’t ship real people

No, this doesn’t mean stop thinking two people would be cute together, that’s not what I’m talking about.

I’m talking about creepy fangirls (and boys) who treat them like they’re fictional characters, that are there purely for their enjoyment, and like they don’t have feelings.
I’m talking about people who got mad at Markiplier when he said he was straight, because that didn’t fit their “headcanon” and “ruined” sceptiplier.
I’m talking about people who harass the significant others of celebrities and YT celebrities, because they’re “supposed to be with this other person!!”, and their significant other “gets in the way of that”.
I’m talking about the kind of people who sent Mikey Way from MCR fanfiction of him and his brother fucking.

Stop shipping real people, stop “headcanoning” them, stop treating them like fictional characters. It’s disrespectful, and fucking creepy.

They’re real people with feelings, and your actions can affect and hurt them, unlike fictional characters.

Happiness Is Homemade

also on Ao3


MooMaw’s kitchen is always filled with light.

It’s pouring through the windows above the sink and filtering through the blue and white checked curtains that hang above it.

Eric sits on the counter, right in the middle of a sun beam, and swings his little feet against the cabinets below as he licks brownie batter off a wooden spoon.

MooMaw has the phone tucked between her shoulder and her ear as she uses a spatula to scrape the last of the batter into the pan.

The cord stretches from the wall and Eric extends a sock covered foot out towards it and tries to touch it with his toes.

It sags before he can get to it as she steps forward and takes the spoon from him.

He only has a second to pout before she’s putting the spatula in the bowl and the bowl in his lap and ruffling his hair.

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smol™

For You

Thank you @viviena for this amazing animation!!! It is perfect :))                   In celebration of such amazing work, I present a fic

  Stiles was a very easily distracted five year old. Example A - he had managed to wander off seventeen times in the past hour, constantly caught up in his need to more closely examine every flower or bug that caught his fancy.

  He had been taken on the hike to expend some energy, to relieve the restlessness that seemed ingrained into the kid’s bones. It was a common occurrence for Sheriff Stilinski to have to revert back to countless websites that he had bookmarked to look for a new babysitter willing to look after his little bundle of spaz.

 It had been almost fate, meeting the Hales. A simple accident, one that the families had long since moved past seeing as a negative. The sheriff and Stiles had gone to the grocery store, his dad looking worn out and tired, staying up too late looking for a new sitter. It seemed like if a person hadn’t already babysat Stiles, they had heard rumors about the boy and his difficult to handle nature. So, for now, the sheriff took the boy everywhere, cashing in favours the receptionists at the precinct owed him when he was called out on duty. But even their patience was growing thin.

  It was in the grocery store after John Stilinski and Talia Hale had exchanged pleasant smiles that all hell broke loose. Or well, Stiles broke loose. He had managed to climb out of the back of the cart and wandered the aisle before running head first into a pair of legs. A boy of about nine or ten years looked down at the stumbling mess of a kid by his knees. The boy looked up, saw the man talking pleasantly with his mother and smelled the familial scents.

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