kids with sticks

all theater kids do is stick their tongues down each other’s throats in the prop closet and dry hump in the backseat of their older sister’s Toyota Corrola in a dennys parking lots

Batfamily as things my family has said

Barbara: “If you eat that piece of bacon I swear to god this friendship is over" 

Dick: *sneaks up on unsuspecting sibling* *randomly drops and crushes said sibling with all their weight* "HUMPBACK WHALE!!!" 

Jason: "Hey come here, I have to tell you a secret. Closer. Little closer.” *sticks tongue in their ear* 

Cass: “I’m sorry but I really don’t like you and I want you to stay outside of my house or maybe just be dead and burn in the darkest pits of hell please" 

Tim: *loses battery for the remote* "WHY WON’T GOD JUST FREAKING LET ME DIE I THINK I’VE EARNED IT BY NOW" 

Stephanie: *accidentally sets fire to counter* "You know, maybe you shouldn’t play with fire anymore” “Yeah, maybe-” *lights match* “-but not today" 

Damian: "You know once a kid dared me to stick up the middle finger in kindergarten and I did and the second I did it he called the teacher and she made me sit out recess that day and this is why I have trust issues" 

Alfred: *banging pots and pans* "GET THE FRICK DOWNSTAIRS YOU PEASANTS I MADE CUPCAKES AND NEED VALIDATION ON MY BAKING ABILITIES" 

Bruce: "hOw DaRe YoU dIsReSpEct mE!!! i aM tHe KiNg Of tHiS LiViNg RoOm!!!" 

“Jason had learned long ago that the best way to control a crowd of bullies was to pick the meanest, biggest kid and force him into submission. Then the others would fall in line.” – chapt. XXV, blood of olympus

this boy is literally everyone’s protective big brother…


スタジオ生出演、羽生に聞く by hana02015

Rudimentary Japanese translation of some interesting points from Yuzu’s recent interview because it’s quite comprehensive and I’m not sure if someone’s subbing it~~ (note: my Japanese is far from perfect so corrections are welcome- this is more of the ‘gist’ of the conversation and not word for word)

  • Said his season began with injury so he was essentially starting from behind the line, but also because of the hard times, he was able to grow
  • Re: Worlds - announcer praised his perfect FS and Yuzu said it was to the point where people were asking if he failed the short on purpose to trigger his fighting spirit lol but he admits that he probably wouldn’t have skated the FS with that sort of spirit if he had done well at the short so he needs to keep improving
  • Re: WTT Yuzu said doesn’t usually get the chance to watch other people’s performances from close by. Seeing the ladies skate so cleanly, he realised that the high level of this era of competition, where even the smallest mistake will cause you to drop in the rankings. In the Mens, it’s not simply that you have to jump quads, you also can’t miss. He said that was very instructive and he learned a lot
  • Re: New Quad Era’ and the 4A. Yuzu said he’s tried it during practice in the off-season but it’s difficult – says it’s a special jump (due to the entry method) with high risk and so he has to consider risk of injuries etc. when practising it
  • TV station made a hologram/projection of Yuzu landing a 4A. Yuzu: ‘whoaa this is cool, I want to jump with it’
  • They say he has to jump 17cm higher than for the 3A. Yuzu: ‘huh, it sounds quite high but it’s…kind of really just my hair isn’t it?’ He’d also need to land 1.1m further than 3A and rotate 10% faster. Yuzu fairly unfazed: ‘Looking at it now, I feel like I…can probably jump that?’ and thanks them because he feels like he can visualise it now, thanks to the hologram lol
  • Yuzu’s old (first?) skating teacher was all like: ‘I feel like conversation about quints is coming closer’ lololol
  • Yuzu doesn’t feel particularly unnerved/scared that the sQuad are younger than him. Said he knew Shoma since very young and though Shoma is a kouhai, after fighting through the competitions together, he also sees Shoma as a nakama ( ; u ; )
  • more discourse on quads: Yuzu says what helps you land the quads is not really young age/experience but ‘sense’ for the jumps
    • The next part was hard for me to understand since I didn’t pick up on all the words but I think the gist of it is that successful jumping comes down to each individual and if you have the instinct for it, a ‘challenger’ can come from anywhere
    • 最終的はそれぞれの個人の体((退学に合わせたもの)))??? idk guys soz lmao
  • SHOWED THE QUAD LUTZ : D
  • They were like ‘can you…land the lutz in practice? should we put a circle or triangle?’ and yuzu laughed and was like ‘t-triangle….’, implying his Lutz isn’t perfect yet 
  • ‘It’s a hard jump but it’s fun! Since the season is finally over and we’re finally free from competitions, I wanted to try it.’
  • Says he’s not going to put the Lutz in the Olympic program - says having a lot of quad varieties does not mean you can win
  • they talked a bit about the 3/11 earthquake and Yuzu said bc he had the experience of losing his home-rink and still remembers the hard times that followed, he’s always quite happy and grateful to be able to practice in a rink
  • Has absolutely no plan for Pyeongchang at the moment LMAO
  • first plan for off season………wants to improve a lot of skating skills (#typical), esp 4Lz and the 3Lz because 3Lz went a bit weird (bc he’s practising 4Lz?) lmaooo
  • Goal for next season: ‘Towards perfection’ - 理想の先へ (literally: towards the ideal destination but he implies he means ‘beyond’ the ideal). He’d characterise this season (with the Loop) as a season of getting closer towards the ideal. Next season he wants to surpass the current ‘ideal’ he has. People say you shouldn’t have limits but Yuzu thinks it’s good to have limits, but if you set your own limits, you should set them higher than you’re able to achieve right now (I think? I’m not entirely confident I’m hearing it right)
Thoughts on Draco and Kids.

Draco “eternal stick up my ass i hate everyone including you” Malfoy is not the person parents want to babysit their kids. He’s rude, blunt, sarcastic and foul. He’s the man who would save a baby from a fire solely because he knows what the parents would say if he didn’t. Draco Malfoy is the man who sets infants in cribs and leaves them to cry themselves to sleep. He never had a happy childhood, so why should they?

Except he’s not.

Draco Malfoy is the man who sings lullabies to a newborn Rose Weasley and rocks her to sleep. He’s the man who gave Teddy Lupin his first broomstick and taught him to fly, but not before teaching him to read and write. He’s the man who stargazes with Hugo and brings him chocolate when he’s feeling down. He’s the man who holds life in his arms and sees it for what it is: an innocent, precious gift. He never had a happy childhood growing up, and he’s going to give them something that he, as the boy who had everything, never had: childhood memories worth remembering.

Draco Malfoy is not the man people think he is, but the reasons behind his reluctance in sharing are unknown.

Harry saw him hold Teddy Lupin in his arms after his trial. They sat in a room waiting for his mother and Andromeda outside. He was awkward at first and the tears came before the smiles. Had Harry Potter not done what he’d done… a chubby hand with fingers the size of his nails non-too-gently patted his cheek after a few tears had fallen, and knowing how annoying children could be when upset, Draco smiled softly and wiped his eyes. One silly face turned into two, and that dark brown tuft of hair turned the exact shade of his white-blonde locks. He screamed, Harry laughed, Teddy cried, the hair was back to brown.

“He does that,” Harry remarked and gently bounced the child back to sleep.

Draco Malfoy went out for coffee with Harry Potter two weeks later. One cup turned into two, one meeting turned into five, one shop turned into a house. Three months later one quick babysitting date turned into one late night stay for his baby cousin. Draco Malfoy kissed Harry Potter that night with one soft infant snore in the background.

He met Victoire Weasley a few months later at the burrow for Christmas Eve Dinner. Molly Weasley’s pumpkin pudding did nothing to ease his nerves and the hard stares of George from across the table. Ginny smiled at the door, and Molly smothered him with hugs and food.

“As thin as Harry, young man… As thin as- Here, have some more potatoes!”

One plate turned into two, and by the end of the night he must’ve gained half his weight from treacle tarts alone.

Bill was strumming a guitar and not wanting to stand in the doorway besides George, Draco left for the kitchen. Three minutes later and a halfhearted argument won, his sleeves were rolled up to his elbows and his hands were scrubbing plates.

“Always do it the muggle way,” she’d said. He couldn’t remember the rest. Near the end Victoire unsteadly crawled into the room. Her hair stuck up on one side of her head and it was clear the child had been sleeping. Sleep lines on her face didnt cover the dried spit all over her chin, and Draco smiled gently as he bent to down to pick her up.

“Miss Victoire,” he’d called her that first time. Laying her horizontal in his left arm, he wiped her chin and rocked her back to sleep. He continued to help clean the room with one hand, and didn’t miss Molly Weasley’s smile.

When Rose came along, Harry was already the favorite babysitter. He and Harry had been living together for quite some time, although it was clear the resident Weasley parents saw Harry as the sole caretaker on work days. They flooed in, asking if ‘Harry could babysit?’/p>

Draco didn’t mind, he never talked much about children. He liked them, but when Harry was blowing raspberries at Teddy on the dining room table, he didn’t take Teddy for himself.

Very few people know him as who he is, Draco and not Draco Lucius Malfoy. He takes pride in his name, but takes more pride in making Dominique smile when she’s pouting and teaching Rose the wand movements for 1st year charms at just 8 years old. He takes pride in his intellect and control, but takes more pride in perfecting his Princess Victoire and Teddy the Dragon voice when reading aloud Teddy’s favorite book.

Nine years later, at Christmas Eve dinner, while Arthur opened the wine bottles, Draco dismissed himself silently and walked upstairs. In the children’s room, Harry was laughing with the kids when he saw Draco standing in the doorway with a smile on his face. He looked back to the kids and stood up. When he told them Draco would read a special story, all protests at Harry’s departure ceased.

When Fluer walked up to kiss her three children goodnight, she had to stop herself from entering the room. Two minutes later, and the rest of her family was beside and behind her, staring into the room. With a high pitched voice, Princess Victoire shouted out from Draco’s lips.

“I may be short, and I may be a princess, but I’m strong! I’ll save my baby sister from that dragon!”

“The baby princess!” Dominique interuppted, and Draco smiled and nodded before turning the page.

When the voice of Teddy the Dragon came out of his mouth, Teddy the Human let out a pitched growl. “I’m gunna eat you!” He shouted and Hugo giggled.

“Hurry Uncle Draco! Ted’s gon eat 'Toire!” Rose added.

It started to make sense, and some adults found themselves laughing along with their kids. Things began to connect, and suddenly it was clear to the Weasley’s. Why their children, and grandchildren, called him “Uncle Draco.“ Why they screamed happily and ran up to hug Harry and Draco during babysitting days. Why Teddy spent half his childhood with white-blonde hair.

Two weeks later after the Hols had ended, Draco got a fire call from Hermione Granger. Almost immediately, he stood up and brushed off his pants.

“Hermione. Hello. Harry’s, uh, upstairs; I can go get him, if you’d-”

“Oh no, it’s fine.” She cut him off, and before Draco could feel the awkwardness creep up his veins, she had already continued on. “Actually, I was wondering if you wanted to babysit…?”

2016 memes

2016 memes

January:
•bad new year jokes
•if a dog wore pants would he wear them like this or this
•all these suggestion blogs
•orange soda please
i’ll have the strawberry soda
me too, the strawberry soda
•You fucked up a perfectly good x is what you did. Look at them. They got anxiety.
•kylo ren is shredded
•Jared Leto: *does something*
Director: oh my God…it’s like…is he Jared…or Joker right now?????
•tag yourself
•super mario 64 half a press
•this is x. be like x

February:
•the finebros suing something
•secret government agent: *punches me in the face* SAY IT
me: never
secret government agent: x
me: *spits blood in their face* fUCK YOU
•bernie or hillary things that have a ridicilous issue and even funnier answers
•jean something, jomething
•damn daniel
•ted cruz is the zodiac killer

March:
•the dad from kuzco being like 👌
•kazoo kid
•everyone who watched zootopia is a furry
•history of japan
•x or y? *insert similiar pictures here, like donald trump and raw chicken*
•get you a man that can do both
•going to papaw’s house for burgers
•no oscar meme is dead meme
•we dem boyz
•i’m you but stronger

April:
•marge simpson
•different variations of the hs panel where jade picks up the note
•tumblr’s lizard voting
•everyone’s a dirty homestuck
•lot of those powerpuff selves
•baby stevens
•ruining someone’s dream journal
•there’s no way out of it you’ll just have to decapitate me
•autocorrect in verbal conversation
person1: i love you
person1: *hate
person2: this is a verbal conversation
•WHAT WE REALLY AREEE
•don’t talk to me or my son ever again
•dark x show me y

May:
•dan backslide (and dover boys)
•dat boi
•stone age spongebob

June:
•are you x or y person? (tag yourself meme in text format)
•get a man who can do both is getting more popular again
•it’s june where the fuck are halloween memes???

July:
•america memes
•IT’S HALLOWEEN
•the vacuum cleaner playing a harmonica
•associating characters/songs/etc. with spongebob screenshots
•this👏emoji👏after👏every👏word
•(any videogame) go, go outside and x
•a picture of something with text, and more pictures after that, in every one of the pictures the picture starts getting waaay worse, but the text gets really detailed
•HANDSY👏CLAPSY👏IS👏A👏NEW👏TROLLSONA👏
•judge: how do you plead?
x: *looks at y*
y: *mouths ‘not guilty’*
x: hot milky
y: jc just lock them up
•hitting the blue button

August:
•arthur screenshot where his hand is a fist
•9-1-1 for kids
•Exeggutor
•harambe
•RANDY YOUR STICKS
•sausage party
•how (character) are you feeling today? *numbers from 1 to ten with silly pictures of the character*
•alola form

September:
•the thing with voltron fandom where there’s train tracks and “death in season 2” and two characters and u have to choose which one to kill
•someone: a basic word
me, an intellectual: that word said with synonyms to make it sound weird
•gonna prank dad when he gets home ((he never gets home))
•[song] but it keeps getting faster

October:
•userboxes
•the presidental debate, i can’t believe that there still are people who want to vote trump after that, yikes
•dedede
•you vs the guy she told you not to worry about
•photofunia retrowave
•picture of someone with those math things
•my longest yeah boy ever
•taking a picture of something that requiers two hands in a bathroom
•posting ur favourite vines

November:
•christmas stuff
•dick: out
•sir, you’ve been in coma
•kermit with a hood on his head
•blurred image that says perfection, after that an image where glasses are being cleaned, and then something u like
•WE ARE NUMBER ONE

December:
•BODE
• *picture of really basic or bad food with text that’s spelled wrong and the phrase “bon appetit” is spelled even more wrong"
•*dropping something, and it spells send nudes*
•x but every time y happens it gets faster
*bee movie but every time they say bee it gets faster
•several spongebob memes
•i described the meme about bad pictures with detailed text in july, it’s wildly popular now
•dramatic youtubers

apparently i missed a few things so, additions:
•steven’s knife
•joe biden
•aux chord
•dabbing
•a lot of spongebob memes, like the blurry mister crabs
•nebby get in the bag
•clowns
•harambe happened earlier than it says on the list
•several stranger things memes
•we die like men

Honestly I think part of the reasons cartoons nowadays are failing is because so many focus on comedy.

Comedy isn’t bad when the jokes are actually funny and aren’t stolen from the internet.

The issue is that they take action oriented shows (Powerpuff Girls, Teen Titans) and turn them into shows that are nothing more than cash cows for the network that bank on the fame of the original while doing nothing to live up to it. A number of cartoons now fizzle out after so many seasons because they simply can’t maintain an audience. The issue is that kids grow up. Eventually the humor and stolen jokes become old to them while cartoons that should have fizzled out are kept going and out on repeat (Looking at you TTG)

“You’re dead if you aim only for kids. Adults are only kids grown up, anyway.” - Walt Disney.

I think that is a quote any cartoonist, comic maker, writer, etc. who aims or gears their works towards children should have in their notebook or animation guide. Why? Because it’s true. So many cartoons are lame because they have no growth with the audience or any appeal beyond a young audience that is subject to lose interest at the drop of a hat. For some reason, it seems like cartoon makers are afraid of making a cartoon that has dark elements to it.

I’m not saying people should make dark cartoons just for the sake of it because that’s what will appeal to kids. Rather, I’m saying there is nothing wrong with having a dark theme in your cartoon or having the characters deal with issues. It doesn’t even have to be truly dark.

For example, The Powerpuff Girls had an episode that showed the actually dangerous or downside to the girls powers when they moved out of Townsville. They had an episode that dealt with toxic relationships (the episode with Buttercup having a crush on Ace). They had an episode that dealt with insecurities on a number of occasions, etc. all while maintaining a sense of laughter and cheerfulness.

Static Shock dealt with homophobia, Racism (the episode where Static met Richie’s father) and gun violence and bullying (the episode where Jimmy was bullied and brought a gun to school with the intention of killing his bullies). They had an episode where Static had to come to terms with his mother’s death.

Captain Planet obviously dealt with pollution and environmental dangers, but also had an episode dedicated towards HIV and suicide.

Steven Universe attracts a wide range of people to the show due to the variety of issues presented in the show. Grief, LGBT issues, etc.

Gumball is a genuinely comedic show that doesn’t rely on memes and jokes stolen from the internet for the sole basis of its writing. The characters are likable and funny without having to be total douchebags to each other.

Shows that attract a wide range of viewers are good shows and they deserve the attention over some cash cow that is a hollow shell of the original.

With so many shows from the 90s getting revivals and reboots, I can only hope that they don’t fall into the shoes of PPG 2016 and TTG.

Kids deserve better than just hollow jokes and shells of the original show that they will outgrow. Kids deserve shows that actually stick with them till adulthood.

2

The Baby Sitter 

for @pottedplantson

@tyrantofthefirmament someone has to water your kid when your off cavorting with @shockb00b  

;) 

Fun Facts about Marvel Loki!

Inspired by that one popular Deadpool post from forever ago!
(I may be cheating because I’m technically including multiple incarnations, but they all “count” as him in some way- no alternate universes or timelines- so shaddup. The distinctions between them obviously matter, but not for the purposes of this list.)

  • He was in the Marvel universe 13 years before Thor was
  • He has “put a terrible slash on the internet” (Yes, that kind)
  • He likes Daft Punk
  • He likes Wicked
  • He got to use Mjolnir once. Against Thor. For the good side.
  • He identifies as both male and female, is clear about it, and other characters acknowledge it
  • He’s pansexual
  • He’s the patron god of certain sex acts
  • He basically killed himself twice to escape his evil baggage from the past (and then his mind to escape future evil baggage)
  • He wore the Guy Fawkes mask once
  • He’s also worn the X-Men uniform
  • He goes by the “God(dess) of Stories” now
  • He wasn’t evil enough to be elected president
  • Really, to sabotage his own campaign, he just called people lighting cars on fire over him idiots, clarified that he wasn’t “evil” anymore, and said he planned to basically play by the rules if elected
  • While “trying” to become president (he actually wasn’t), he made sure to face off against a woman whose life he’d ruined in the past so that she’d look like a hero when everyone realized she was right about him, which did great things for her career
  • When he was forced to erase his memories and “change,” he only made sure to remember that he loved Thor and his one friend, Verity, who believed in him
  • He used to secretly hire Deadpool and Gambit to run cons for him, then would trick them into thinking they’d betrayed each other to get himself off the hook
  • He named his hellhound puppy after Thor when he died
  • He’s totally a selfie person
  • He hates the word “smooch”
  • When he was trapped on earth with false memories (due to his own spell), he was a friendless, nerdy child. When others explained to him what was going on, he quickly regained his memories, led them through a convoluted set of steps create a second spell to free everyone else from their own fake memories, and then…. turned out to have not regained his memories at all. He thought they were role-playing with him. The new “spell” failed at a critical moment.
  • He was the protagonist, antagonist, and “innocent victim that died at the beginning to kick the story off” of one series, all at the same time.
  • He was once locked in a tree by Odin. The only way to escape was if someone cried because of his situation (the joke being that no one ever would, since everyone hated him). After a long time, he finally built up enough willpower to fling a leaf into someone’s eye, /technically/ drawing a tear that existed because of his situation.
  • Sleipnir, Loki’s 8-legged horse child from the original mythology, technically does exist somewhere in the universe. Other canon children include the Fenris Wolf and the Midgard Serpent. He’s even rumored to be the father of Hela, Queen of the Dead, but neither of them have any idea if that’s true or not, especially since she has existed longer than he has
  • He actually time-traveled and tricked Odin into adopting him
  • He once dramatically took the form of a unicorn
  • “Loki’s the bad guy! Sauron multiplied by that antiDumbledore guy cubed! His alignment is totally chaotic evil! He sends misogynist abuse for the lulz!” - His playful description of his more evil past self
Sweet Summer Playlist

i’m trying to avoid studying so i put together a list of songs that make me think of the summer. i hope it brings happy visions of warm days on the beach 🌴

1. keep your head up - ben howard
2. first - cold war kids
3. antelope - the dirty heads
4. cabin by the sea - the dirty heads
5. sound of change - the dirty heads
6. undertow - iration
7. long hot summer - keith urban
8. ends of the earth - lord huron
9. fairytale - milky chance
10. sweet sun - milky chance
11. sunshine - pacific air
12. fade away - rebelution
13. good vibes (feat. lutan fyah) - rebelution
14. the sun ii - snakadaktal
15. once upon a time - soja
16. talking to myself - soja
17. weight of sound (feat. tj o'neill) - stick figure
18. dawn of time - tribal seeds
19. renegades - x ambassadors
20. islands - the xx