kids in sports

6

I’m proud of Cait for a lot of reasons. I’m proud that she works hard and does well. I’m proud when she wins awards. Last night, while other Young Guns award winners came from across the continent or across the ocean, she just had to come from across the river from Brooklyn to Manhattan. Her work and her face were splashed up on the walls. She got to walk up and get this beautifully glowing cube. I am proud of all that.

But here’s the thing. This past summer Cait went to New Jersey to photograph Wyatt for GQ. It was for a story about the perils of football and considered whether parents should allow their kids to play a sport that could potentially injure their brains. Cait said that Wyatt was just a little bit chubby and a little bit clumsy as little boys can be and also an absolute doll. He was Just So Excited to think that someone was Going To Take His Picture. He was a more-than-willing model. He ran. He jumped. He caught passes. He offered ideas for better camera shots. He told Cait that he could come to other photo shoots and be her model and it didn’t even have to be for football. It could be for anything. She had a great time with him and let him think he was in control.

Later, Wyatt’s dad wrote a letter to Caitlin thanking her for forwarding the photos of Wyatt to his family, but mostly he wrote to thank her for how she treated Wyatt. As a parent, I know what it’s like to feel that your child is being mistreated or ignored or slighted. I’m proud of Caitlin for a lot of reasons, but mostly I’m proud that she treats the little ones with kindness and respect—enough that she earned a letter from a parent telling her—-Good Job.

I think, instead of telling kids ‘don’t do drugs, they’re bad’ we should show them the opiate withdrawal patient I had the other day

25 years old, in jail for god knows what, cops bring him in with a lac to his forehead from banging it on the wall repeatedly. He is already handcuffed so we put him in an isolation room, with sliding glass doors. Because he is in custody we take everything but the bed out of the room. 

Patient is screaming the whole time he doesn’t want to be there (same bro) with blood everywhere from the head lac. 

5min later, I hear this sickening crash, I’m pretty sure someone has just run head first into the glass doors, because mate I’ve done that before those curtains are assholes, so rounding the corner I see blood all over the glass door, patient still screaming he wants out but is now banging his head on the glass. 

It takes 4 security guards to hold this guy down, he is absolutely losing his shit, screaming and flailing and has no idea whats going on. Calling out for his mom, for Neil (???), for a sandwich, doesn’t know what day it is or just refuses to answer we can’t tell, pupils 4mm and sluggish but thats how it was when they brought him in, so security cuffs him to the bed so he can’t hit the wall. 

Fastforward 10 minutes and he has dislocated/broken his wrist trying to get out of the bed and to the door, he has puke and stool everywhere, refused to take the ativan so we gave midaz, but that didn’t touch him. 

This guy screamed from 2-7, we maxed out what we could give him for benzos and he was extraordinarily agitated and wouldn’t settle and was only in the beginning stages of withdrawals. It was terrifying, but the thing that got me was after screaming about how we took the 20′s (from his underwear??) he was quiet for a minute, I thought ‘shit the midaz finally caught up with him and now were gonna need to intubate’ but he then screams

“I don’t want to do this anymore, I don’t want to be on drugs anymore, I want this to stop, I want to be clean, please someone help me”

And thats what got me. This guy was 25, had his whole life ahead of him, but got caught up in drugs and it was going to kill him, and he wanted out, but withdrawals were so bad that it was easier to keep using. 

Fuck telling kids don’t do drugs. Show them what its like to try to stop, how all your friends die from OD, how you are one phonecall-not-made away from death yourself, how you get to be tied to a bed in the ER and your nurses need to apologize to other patients because you can’t stop screaming and just shit yourself and puked the cookie I gave you and your body is on fire. 

Don’t just tell them not to do it, because that doesn’t work, show them what its like to try to stop, because sometimes fear works better than facts. 

Note: Throughout the day we gave him 4 of ativan, 27.5 of Midazlolam and 12 of haldol, and this guy still was still agitated and screaming and 100% inconsolable, and by that time the doc was like ‘we can’t give him anymore, but lets transfer him out before he crashes’. It was a fucking time

Go team! A fear submitted by Ming to Deep Dark Fears - thanks!

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INFP things

  • Is afraid of breaking rules (sometimes)
  • Has dark humor but always makes people laugh
  • Humor fixes everything
  • Tries to help relationships but won’t leave their own
  • Picks up bad habits but tries to play it off like it’s nothing
  • Fearful of the future
  • Music heavily depends on their mood
  • Multiple playlist for different moods
  • Often mixes up their sleep schedule
  • Feels detached when their friends argue
  • Needs background noise to sleep
  • Doesn’t like to make the first move, but will if needed
  • Isn’t keen on social events
  • Hates eye contact
  • Has difficulty being their own person
  • Hates math but not bad at it
  • ‘Social Outing’ is going to walmart
  • Would prefer Netflix and pizza over a highschool football game
  • Hates when people don’t like them but they act like they don’t care
  • Aren’t violent but has anger built in them
  • Always tries to make sure someone is okay before ending conversation
  • Won’t condone violence but will beat the shit out of someone for upsetting their friend
  • Fear that they talk too much about themselves
  • Sits in back of the room
  • Doesn’t raise their hand unless they absolutely know the answer
  • Will plan out everything but ends up going wayy off track
  • Doesn’t text first….or back
  • Impatient (don’t deny it)
  • Remembers everything anybody said to them ever
  • Not the popular kid but not the nerd
  • Sports? What are sports?
  • Thinks out loud
  • Fearful of confrontation
  • Builds up a tough shell but is really an emotional ball of feels
  • Fills their cart on amazon but never buys the stuff
  • Buyers remorse. For 6 minutes
  • Has zero games on their phone but solitaire
  • Will not accept the fact that they are wrong
  • Procrastination
  • SHUTS THEIR BEDROOM DOOR ALL THE TIME
  • Will wait until the episode is finished to pee
  • Prefers Internet friends
  • Always afraid they’ve overstepped boundaries
  • Doesn’t care how bad terms are, if someone asks them for advice they give them the best advice possible

“My grandfather at the 1955 motorcycle race at Dachstein, Austria”