i thought the delena parallels from 3x14 and 5x16 shows that what they feel for each other is obsession, their "love" is unhealty and no one wants that. elena telling damon his love for her maybe is a problem is 100% true damon killed jeremy for it, he can't be a normal person and be her friend, killed aaron and kidnapped jeremy because he was so sad that she dumped him. and elena using drugs to see damon, she destroyed herself for him, so her "love" for him is a problem.
Which is essentially what I meant, the reason why I put SE gifs in my response is because I was showing that the show doesn’t portray the irrationality of an obsessive love properly with DE.
While Stefan and Elena were not an obsessive, toxic dynamic, they each portray that kind of agitation, irrational thinking very well. Damon is standing there going, this is a BAD idea and Stefan is yelling that he doesn’t care and storms off. Elena was literally going to run into a burning building because she saw Stefan go in and Bonnie has to stop her. They actually get crazed about each other
What you’re saying about how Elena destroyed herself by taking drugs to hallucinate Damon when you say it it sounds exactly like what you said, when you watch it it’s actually pretty muted and there are absolutely no consequences to that decision and it’s just a waste of time. Elena doesn’t actually get to a dark place because she loves Damon so much, the show stops it before she does something that would be considered too much and therefore it doesn’t actually feel like she’s tail-spinning, it doesn’t look like she’s consumed whole by this love that’s destructive because trashing the crypt one time doesn’t really say much. And Damon killing Aaron and snapping Jeremy’s neck and using Andie, yeah that behaviour is obviously a problem but because Damon did things like that when he was in love with Katherine, Andie = Caroline, snapping Jeremy’s neck = snapping Vicki’s neck, killing Aaron = feeding on sorority girls, that’s just who Damon IS, that isn’t unique to Elena and so Damon himself is the problem not his “love” for Elena, this is why I’m saying the show doesn’t do that dynamic properly, they don’t commit to it.