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Happy Birthday, my brightest star ♥ (©)

Okay so i typed up a whole message under the read more cut but then tumblr ate it and im just- sobs i just spent the last half an hour pouring out my heart huhgugh why but okok uh well, Happy Birthday Yixing! Wow, this is the third time we celebrate your birthday together ;u; I’m so proud of you ;u; i know its sounds all cheesy and gross but you are honestly one of the best things that has ever happened in my life and i am so fricking glad that two years ago on that rainy night, i decided to procrastinate and watch EXO-M on Yin Yue Tai instead of doing my history homework.Yixing, thank you so much for giving me so much hope and supporting me through my hardships in the last two years. it’s been hard and everyday’s a battle filled with fearful thoughts like “will i ever recover” “will i ever be happy again” “will there be a day where i wake up feeling great and stay great for the rest of the day, week, month, year” it’s hard but i’m trying - for my family, for my friends, for myself and especially for you. i know a lot of people see me as a joke because of my love for kpop but what they dont see is how inspiring, brave and amazing you guys are. especially you, yixing. i am so grateful for being able to be your fan. I do feel intimidated by other xingmis, despite the fact that they’re all just as kind hearted as you are but sometimes i feel that i will never be able to love you as much as they do, be as amazing as they are or even see you. it really scares me and i know you will never be able to know of my existence but i do dream of the day i get to thank you for saving me. you gave me another reason to smile, especially on my darkest days. you brought light and happiness back in my life when i needed it the most, two years ago when i hit rock bottom for the first time. your determination drives me to work harder, your love for your family reminds me that i need to take care of my family more, your love for your brothers, fellow band members, remind me to cherish the memories i make with my friends and to hold them close to me. you are truly amazing and i cannot put my love for you into words. thank you so much for everything. i hope you will be able to see your family soon and that you stay happy and healthy everyday. 生日快樂, 我的天空上最亮, 最美的星星 - 張藝興 ♥