keys to the abyss

2

Tsukishima ‘trying to be smooth’ Kei for once won the flirting with Kuroo ‘too deep in love’ Tetsurou.

A quick self indulgent doodle after I finished commission today. I’m so excited for Kurootsukki week!! Let’s start next year with these volleyball dorks! 

there is a difference
between wanting nothing
and not wanting anything.

the first is a longing
for the kind of absolution only
death can buy / a desperation for
the end because the in-between is
cruel and you are so tired.

you live your life
around nothing, until ‘nothing’
becomes a boy with a jigsaw past and an
attitude problem / until 'nothing’ becomes
palms pressed to the back of shivering
necks / until it becomes yes or no and always
and stay and a key traced into skin.

'nothing’ ceases to be an abyss, forgets
how to be void / 'nothing’ keeps you warm
at night, 'nothing’ holds you steady,
'nothing’ trusts you, 'nothing’ begins to love you.

nothing becomes many things.
and for once?
you want everything.


l.s. | NOTHING HOLDS YOU STEADY (LIKE HE DOES) © 2016

Music, can be the key, a key to lift one’s life from the abyss of stringent society to something much greater. It can be the relaxation and tranquility necessary to calm a great mind. Music, can heal what has been deprived of us, and it can even be the key, to solving a great mystery.
—  Sherlock Holmes, talking about music - The Warsaw Composer; a new adventure written by me, coming soon. 😘 (Comment if you actually want the story, ‘cause I don’t do anything without some love here.)
  • cashier: you're short 32 cents
  • me: oh. gimme a second.
  • me: *rummages through purse*
  • me: *starts putting things on the counter to get to the bottom of the purse abyss*
  • me: *pulls out phone, keys, pencils, a tuner, two sets of rosin, the full score to mozart's symphony in g minor, a pendulum metronome, an extra violin bow, and a textbook about music history*
  • me: alright here's a quarter and a dime

everybody is afraid of something-

and you know how easy fears are to steal when they
aren’t kept under lock and key / shoved into an abyss under
your heart / a pitfall of grief for your parents / and the doubt 
that you’d ever find another home without your other half.

everybody is afraid of something-

you used to fear death but what’s the point of fearing something
you’ve already felt in a courtyard in Sokovia / and you were
haunted long before your brother fell anyway / trapped for days
under rubble / you made your peace with this reaper / the
ghosts that follow you now run deeper than that.

everybody is afraid of something-

you fear losing control / hurting the people you fought so hard
to defend / you fear becoming every monster you worried hid
under your bed / and this fear isn’t unfounded / you know it
because you saw people die as a direct result of your actions / this
is the worst kind of fear / one that’s already half proved itself true.

everybody is afraid of something-

but do your demons consume you or give you a reason
to fight back? / red-stained hands reaching for a ledge
as you fall / the battle lines are already half-drawn / it’s time
to decide; face your fear or give in to it?


EVERYBODY IS AFRAID OF SOMETHING // l.s. © 2016