kevin the guard

Wesninski AU

Red Right Hand on AO3

Summary:

Nathaniel Wesninski has been trained to follow in his father’s footsteps as the next Butcher of Baltimore. When leadership changes hands, Ichirou Moriyama orders a clean house and forces Nathaniel to help him. In the weeks that follow, it is discovered that Riko Moriyama’s pet has run away to Palmetto State University.

When Nathaniel is sent to investiage what happened, he thinks he’s just being sent to collect Kevin Day. He doesn’t realize he’ll have to deal with Kevin’s guard dog.

Nathaniel ran a finger over his knife, debating whether or not he should switch to one with a serrated edge. He nodded to himself, changed blades and crouched in front of the officer. “Unfortunately, I’m not the one you need to convince. The Moriyamas don’t believe you, Brooks. And they’re not here.”

He pressed his blade to the inside of Brooks’s thigh. The pathetic begging was quickly tuned out; it was the same thing every time anyway. He didn’t need to hear it. Brooks quieted when Nathaniel began to run his knife along his leg. The cop’s breath came out in shaky gasps, nearly in sync with the rasping slide of plastic against wood as he gripped the arm of the chair.

“The femoral artery runs along this part of your leg. If I leave a deep enough wound, you could bleed out in just minutes,” Nathaniel said. The serrated blade bit into Brooks’s skin, opening thin lines of blood that seeped into his jeans. Nathaniel looked up, smiled faintly, and watched as the man’s resolve broke.

youtube

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice - Teaser Clip

Kevin Smith has a famous story about his time writing a movie called “Superman Reborn” in the late 90s. In his story the producer, John Peters, makes several suggestions for the film that are all batshit crazy. He suggests that Superman not wear the costume, doesn’t fly, fights a giant spider, and suggests that Superman have guards for Brainiac to fight.

In the story Kevin Smith retorts, “why would Superman need guards, he’s Superman,” and everyone laughs. Because it’s ridiculous.

It’s right there at 3:50 in the above clip.

Well, you know what the first thing I noticed while watching the new clip for Batman Superman? Guards.

Superman doesn’t need guards. Because he’s Superman.

John Peters also mentions that Superman should look like Sean Penn in Dead Man Walking and have “the eyes of a violent caged animal, of a fucking killer,” which is exactly how Superman looks in the clip.

Yeah. WTF.

So, if anyone asks why I’m not excited for Batman vs Superman im going to point them to this post. Because I tried to keep an open mind. I did. But once again DC failed me.

Ok but here’s a serious question fam, would Kevin have a hidden/soft Irish accent?

Like ok hear me out fam, I know we all love Neil having accents from being on the run and blending in and all that ( all A+ would recommend if you haven’t seen them yet) but like

Kevin’s mom is Irish? (Scottish? No pretty sure it’s Irish? Idk it’s late but here we go) and she was doing her thesis or whatever in Japan when she co created exy and she didn’t die until Kevin was like 10 or something (that’s probably wrong but oh well) which means he would have lived with her and picked up her accent.

Then the Ravens made him get rid of it because ~uniformity~ (jokes is cause they’re a cult) so he stopped using it

Now imagine it’s his like 4th year at Palmetto and they’ve been through everything and they’re a happy little family so Kevin starts to let his guard down a little and get comfortable with them and just enjoy himself and there all just up late one night (team movie night duh) and he’s all soft and sleepy and someone gets up to get a drink and he asks them to bring him one and everyone just stops because since when does Kevin have an accent? Like what? And he doesn’t even realize and everyone dies because wtf that’s hot and he gets more comfortable with it slipping out but it’s pretty soft from years of disuse/living in the U.S.

Point is Kevin Day has a god damn accent that comes out when he’s sleepy or excited or really mad and not keeping it in check and y'all can take this from my cold dead hands