kevin holmes


UFC Summer Kickoff Press Conference:

Jon Jones vs. Daniel Cormier

Amanda Nunes vs. Valentina Schevchenko

Claudia Gadelha vs. Karolina Kowalkiewicz

Michael Chiesa vs. Kevin Lee

Chris Weidman vs. Kelvin Gastelum

Michael Johnson vs. Justin Gaethje

Joanne Calderwood vs. Cynthia Calvillo

Holly Holm vs. Bethe Correia


“They were the beats of my heart, the skin of my body, the breath that entered my mouth and nostrils. They were the beautiful friends who had taught me that love was the life-force.”

True friendship is when your friend tells your teacher “tomorrow is a latter day” and without missing a beat you yell across the classroom “latter day doesn’t mean tomorrow! It means afterlife!”


Thanks to the help of the lovely @writingbeautifulmen I have finally been able to create a proper masterpost for all of you. Thank you so much for the support and I hope you keep reading!


Dean Winchester:

Kitten (smut)

Eat it, Winchester (smut)

Sleepless Nights (drabble)

Sam Winchester:

Heartless Hunter (series- more parts coming)

Figured You Out (smut)

When In Vegas (smut)


My Angel (drabble)


Now and Forever: Part One , Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five (smut, angst, major character death, fluff)

Tease, Part Two (smut)

Chuck Shurley:

Coping: Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part FivePart Six, Part Seven (Coming soon) (angst, smut, lots of fluff)


Bath Time (smut)

Movie Night (drabble)

Kevin Tran:

Tran’s The Man (drabble)


Matt Murdock:

Mr. Murdock (drabble)

The Devil In Hell’s Kitchen 

Bates Motel

Dylan Massett:

New In Town (smut)



Can I Trust You? (drabble)

  • show/book: look at this amazing character! He/she is strong, pretty, smart
  • me: whoa wait a minute! There is something wrong...
  • show/book: what? No no, there is nothing wrong. We are sure that you are going to love him/her.
  • me: but still...
  • character: *does something good*
  • me: ...well...I can feel something..
  • character: *does something incredibly amazing, awesome and shows how strong and smart he/she is*
  • character: *dies*
  • me: shit *cries forever, hates the book/show*
  • show/book: *evil maniac laugh in the distance*
  • me: I will never watch something like that again!
  • me one week later: *watchs/read brand new show/book with amazing character* fuck

“I prefer stories about people who are, in a sense, trying to find better versions of themselves.”

Thanks for the movies, Curtis Hanson.

Castle high school au (rysposito obvi) that i don't know if i should continue...

“This year, I’m gonna talk to her.” Rick smiled as drive down the street tapping along to the music against the steering wheel to his Ferrari.

“Yeah,” Kevin said looking away from the window. “You’ve only said that since middle school and 5 years later and the closest you’ve gotten to actually conversing were filled with your sarcastic wit.”

Rick shoved his best friend’s shoulder roughly with one arm and used the other to continue driving, “Shut up,” He said with a smile.

Kevin smiled back and compared their schedules again even though he already knew which classes they shared, “Maybe you’ll get lucky this year. She could be in some classes.”

Rick nodded his head and smirked at his friend once he was fully stopped at a red light. “Maybe a Benjamin here or there would persuade the office to make sure our schedules match up nicely.”

Kevin rolled his eyes, but knew his friend was joking. Richard Castle came from a very wealthy family–well mother. His mother Martha Rogers (Rogers was her stage name) was a successful actress. It was only Martha and Rick living in the house, so they didn’t split the fortune with much more than themselves for a living.

They almost never hung out at Kevin’s place; his family was extremely religious and strict and it was so much easier to get away with stuff at the Castle’s. Rick’s mother let them do whatever they wanted as long as they didn’t break anything or hurt themselves.

But, even though Rick had more than enough money he never once bragged about it or used to his advantage. He often teased himself, joking around about buying bribes. Kevin knew that Rick was spoiled more than most kids in their school, but you wouldn’t know unless you spent as much time as Kevin did with him.

For example, Rick’s car that he drove around town in with Kevin was a Ferrari and it was all his. The car would get envious glares, but no one ever walked up to the boy and asked for a ride. Kevin and Rick weren’t that popular, the rest of the school seeing them as outcasts. Rick was an amazing writer; he was in accelerated classes and was the star writer of the school paper and Kevin had brains, but wasn’t in all the academic clubs he could join because he mostly used his free time to practice the piano.

He absolutely loved to play; his parents weren’t really too happy to see him ‘waste his abilities’ in the drama department, but Rick and Martha gave him all the support he needed.

“I’ll bet you 20 bucks that I’ll tell my crush how I feel before you tell yours.” Rick’s teasing broke the comfortable silence as they pulled up to the street their school was on.

Kevin groaned, “Come on Rick, you know that’s not fair.” He narrowed his eyes and pouted out the window. “It’s different.”

Castle quirked a smile and started to obnoxiously sing, “Love is looooove, it’s okay to be gaaaaay! You like dick, but hey, you’re my friend anywaaaaaaay!!”

Kevin’s cheeks burned up and he swatted his arm telling him to shut up before someone else heard them. Rick and Martha were the only ones that knew Kevin was gay; if anyone else found out he’d be in trouble. It was a small town and everyone knew everyone, meaning if the town found out that Kevin Ryan, the son of one of the most religious families in town was gay…Hell would most likely freeze over.

“That’s not even a song.” Kevin grumbled.

“I know, I made it up and it rhymes. I have the talent.” Rick laughed with a proud smile on his face.

“I’m serious, Rick, if anyone finds out, my parents will flip.” Kevin’s whispered now that they were pulling into the school parking lot.

“Man, don’t get your panties in a twist, I’ve known since 6th grade and haven’t told a soul. Your secret is safe with me.” Rick held up his left hand in a mock fashion.

“Sorry, I know, but just one slip and my life is ruined forever. So if you could kindly not talk about my homosexuality outside of your house, it would be appreciated.”

Rick started to laugh and mocked his friend, “So if you could kindly not talk about my homosexuality outside of your house, it would be appreciated.”

Kevin flicked him in the ear, “Oh so you’re funny too?”

“You bet,” Rick laughed as he pulled up into a vacant parking spot by the door.

They both stepped out and shared an anxious glance, “Two more years and then we’re done, Kev.”

“Two more years.” Kevin echoed as he walked through the doors ready to start his first day of 11th grade.

First period for Kevin was Chemistry and unfortunately he would not meet up again with Rick until English, 4th period.

Kevin knew the drill, he’d take an empty seat with no one around him because any time he tried sitting next to anyone they always just picked up their books and moved. So he plopped down in the back lab table and pulled out his worn out copy of Sherlock Holmes; this collection of stories was his favorite and this is even close to the first time he’s read it.

A rather funny part made Kevin smile and laugh quietly to himself when he heard a sudden voice as someone actually sat down next to him. Kevin lifted his head and saw that there were several other empty seats so that meant he wasn’t someone’s last choice.

“Whatcha reading?”

Kevin turned to look at the boy who had sat down next to him to see none other than Javier Esposito staring intently at him.

Javier Esposito, the boy that Kevin had been crushing on since freshman year in high school when he first laid eyes on him in his football jersey during the school’s homecoming pep rally.

“Sherlock Holmes…” Kevin was surprised that his voice didn’t crack out of nervousness at all.

“So not the Bible?” Javier’s tone made Kevin’s stomach plummet.


The jock shrugged his shoulders, “Demming bet me 10 bucks you were reading some religious crap over here. I won.”

Kevin avoided his gaze and part of him hated that the boy that Kevin had spent the last two years looking up to was actually a douchebag.

“Good for you,” Kevin shot back curtly as he stuck his head back into his book.

Kevin felt the Hispanic boy’s linger on him and he tried his best to ignore him, but he wouldn’t quit.

“What story you reading?” Javier broke the silence as he bounced one of his pencils up and down on the table top.

A Scandal in Bohemia…” Kevin answered slowly not expecting Javier to know what he was talking about.

“Oh,” Javier snapped his fingers, “That’s the one when Holmes and Watson need to get the photograph and use the smoke bomb to fake a fire and of course the girl looks exactly where she kept the picture because of instinct.”

Kevin gave him a funny look and Javier blushed as he explained, “I may be a jock, but I’m not stupid. Well at least not completely.”

Kevin smiled and found himself realizing that Javier wasn’t a dick; it was just his tough football cover in front of his teammates. “I don’t think you’re stupid.”

Javier looked at him for a moment before he leaned back in his chair, “Mind being my lab partner?”

Kevin eyed him, looked over at the small cluster of his friends behind them before looking back at him, “I don’t know why you’d want to, but okay.”

Javier gave him a funny look, “Why wouldn’t I? You got cooties or something?” Kevin felt himself relax at Javier’s joking tone.

“Some think so.”

“Well I’m not some, so I guess we’re partners.” Kevin couldn’t hold back his smile when Javier smiled softly.

“Guess so…” Kevin shrugged his shoulders and put the book down. “I still don’t know why, but okay.”

Javier held Kevin’s gaze for several seconds until the bell rang signaling the start of class. Kevin turned his head down and busied himself with taking out a notebook, still aware of Javier’s staring.

Their teacher droned on for the full 40 minutes about lab safety and what to do in case of an emergency. Towards the end, he said that these would be the partners for the year and they better be happy with their choices because they would need to trust one another in case something went wrong with chemicals. Which Kevin didn’t really understand because friend or not, if you see someone about to harm themselves from chemicals it’s common sense to use your brain and help that person.

The period unfortunatley went by too fast, with Javier whispering his commentary to Kevin as their boring teacher just talked and talked.

When the bell rang, Kevin didn’t want to leave because he didn’t know if he’d see Javier in any of his other classes. He always had first period to look forward to, but it would be nice to see him more than once. Kevin thought they hit it off (as friends, definitely nothing more) and he was excited at the possible friendship.

When the bell rang, he rose slowly from his seat and waved goodbye to Javier and the football player smiled back causing Kevin’s knees to go weak.

Kevin was bummed to see that Javier wasn’t in his next period, Trig class and was in an even worse mood when he was in his 3rd period…gym.

Kevin wasn’t one of those always horny teenagers, and he didn’t find many guys attractive enough in the school to cause a problem in the locker room. But of course, Javier had to be put in his class, and his locker placed only three down the row. The coach had done his best to split up the boys, but there were one or two rows where more than one boy used a locker during that period.

“Hey Ryan,” He heard Javier smile as he threw his bag of clothes into his open locker.

Kevin turned his head, it taking only a moment to register that Javier had called him by his last name. “Hey, Javier.”

“Fancy seeing you here.” Javier grinned stripping off his t-shirt to reveal his toned chest and arms.

Kevin mumbled an agreement and stuck his head into his locker avoiding Javier until he was fully dressed again.

Kevin changed as quickly as he could out of his shirt and decided to wait until Javier finished his dressing and left the row of lockers until he even dared to change into his sweats.

Apparently, Javier was having no problem at all and was okay with coming over to Kevin’s side with his pants only half pulled up. “Yo, Ryan.”

Kevin peeked his head out from his locker and kept his eyes above Javier’s shoulder line. He silently prayed that his blush wasn’t as noticeable as it felt.

“Where’s your schedule, maybe we’re in other classes together. That’d be cool, don’t ya think?” Javier lifted the paper in his hand and waved it slightly at Kevin.

Kevin nodded and quickly pulled his out and handed it over to him, glad to have a moment distraction so he could pull down his pants and throw on his sweats. Kevin didn’t even think he was hard enough for Javier to notice, but it only took one mistake.

Kevin waited for the distinct sound of paper rustling to slip out of his jeans, groaning inwardly when the denim brushed against his groin. A quick look at least eased him to know that he was just being paranoid and there was no bulge exposing how he really felt about the boy next to him.

He pulled the sweats up and sighed in relief before turning around glad to have the confidence he had himself under control now that Javier was fully dressed.

“Man, we got home ec, lunch, english and Spanish together.” Javier clapped Kevin on the back and grinned.

Kevin was still unsure to why Javier suddenly wanted nothing more than to hang out with him, but he wasn’t one to complain.

The class went by thankfully uneventful, since it was the first day they didn’t do much playing; just toured the just redone workout room and how to work the new machines.

Javier met up with Kevin in the locker room after class and even waited for him to get changed before heading out to their next class that they shared.

“Sucks that we didn’t get to play today.” Javier said as he pushed open the door leading to the hall.

Kevin shrugged his shoulders, “I don’t know, I don’t really like sports so I’m fine with it.”

Javier gave him a bewildered look, “What do you mean, you don’t do sports? What teenage boy doesn’t like sports?”

Kevin laughed, “I could name a few.” Javier was a decent kid, but he still had that mind where he thought everyone wanted to be like him and the baseball players.

“So, what do you do if you don’t play sports?” Javier didn’t sound rude; he sounded genuinely curious.

“I read, play the piano, hang out with my friend; what you do except substitute the interests for one another.” Kevin didn’t know why Javier even cared; his life wasn’t at all interesting.

“Anything after school? For the school like a club, maybe?” Kevin should have been wondering why he was asking so many questions, but the only thing he could think about was that Javier Esposito actually wanted to know about him and actually seemed to like him.

“I’m, uh, trying out for the play.” Kevin usually got embarrassed when he talked about his secret awe at watching performances up close.

Kevin sensed Javier’s hesitation, “You weren’t in any of the high school plays before, were you? I don’t think I remember you…”

Kevin’s heart stuttered at the thought that if Javier didn’t remember seeing him in the play, that must have meant that he was looking for him. “Oh, sorry, I forgot to mention I don’t act,” Kevin blushed looking down at his books, “I play the score on the piano.”

“That’s you? Man, you are talented!” Javier smiled and Kevin only felt his blush increase at Javier’s praising.

“You’re into the plays?” Kevin asked curiously because Javier did seem to have a good share of opinion on them.

“Not so much, more of moral support for my girl, Becks.” Javier shoved past a group of over excited freshmen with a roll of his eyes.

“Your girl?” Kevin hadn’t meant to say it out loud, and didn’t realize he did until Javier laughed.

“Gross, dude, not like that! She’s practically my sister.”

The jealousy that had rose in his stomach quickly disappeared after Javier’s explanation. “Oh.”

Javier rolled with his eyes with a smile before they finally reached the home ec class room. They stepped inside to see a room full of students split into tables of four. And the only two seats left happened to be in the same table as Kate Beckett and Rick Castle.

Rick was currently saying something to the girl that was making it almost impossible for her to breath. Kevin’s eyes almost burst out of his socket when he saw Kate place a hand on his knee as she laughed and said, “Rick, you’re killing me.”

Javier slid into the seat and immediatley joined in on the laughter, “Hey, the party doesn’t start 'til I get here so save the laughter.”

Kate rolled her eyes and nodded her head towards Rick still trying to subside her laughter, “Espo, this is Rick Castle.”

Kevin sat down silently watching the exchange from his seat as Javier held out his hand, “Nice to meet ya’…hey aren’t you the kid with the sweet ride? Red Ferrari?”

Rick smiled proudly with a shrug of his shoulders, “That would be me.”

“Nice, man, bet the ladies dig it.” Javier said and Kevin ignored that small stab to the heart; just another painful reminder at how straight Javier was.

“Maybe, but there’s only one girl’s opinion I care about in this school…” He winked at Kate before turning on his charm to make her laugh again. “And no, it’s not Kevin.”

Kevin blushed madly, used to Rick’s teasing, but yet to have it said in front of others. At least Javier seemed to think it was more funny, then to actually agree with him as he laughed along, but glanced over at Kevin. He had a look on his face that Kevin couldn’t even see as anything other than questioning. He could practically hear Javier’s thoughts, Is this okay? Are we good enough friends to laugh jokes like this?

And if Kevin wasn’t in love with Javier already, then that moment made sure he fell all the way. And hard.

I’ve read 88 books in 2013. The books I loved:

  • Arthur Conan Doyle - Sherlock Holmes stories
  • Kevin Wilson - Family Fang
  • Stephen King - 11/22/63, The Stand, Doctor Sleep
  • J.W.Ironmonger - The Notable Brain of Maximilian Ponder
  • Alejandro Zambra - Ways of Going Home and Bonsai
  • John Cheever - The Collected Stories
  • Jonathan Franzen - The Corrections
  • Haruki Murakami - The Wind-up Bird Chronicle, Kafka on the Shore, 1Q84
  • J.D.Salinger - Raise High the Roof Beam, Carpenters
  • J.M.Coetzee - The Slow Man and The Age of Iron
  • John Irving - The World According to Garp
  • Siegfried Lenz - The German Lesson
  • Heinrich Böll - The Clown
  • Raymond Carver - What We Talk About When We Talk About Love
  • Ursula Le Guin - The Left Hand of Darkness
  • Donna Tartt - The Secret History
  • Doris Lessing - The Golden Notebook
  • Jonathan Coe - The Rotters’ Club
  • Carson McCullers- The Ballad of Sad Cafe and Other Stories
  • Yukio Mishima - Spring Snow
  • Julie Otsuka - The Buddha in the Attic
  • Daniel Pennac - Comme un Roman
  • Franz Kafka - Letters to Milena
  • Andrei Platonov - Soul
  • Anita Brookner - A Start in Life
  • Annejet Van Der Zijl - Sonny Boy
  • Arnon Grünberg - Huid en Haar
  • Tim Parks - Cara Massimina
  • George Orwell - Books v.Cigarettes
  • David Vann - Legend of a Suicide
  • Tolstoy - Family Happiness, The Death of Ivan Ilyich and some other magnificent stories
  • Juli Zeh - Corpus Delicti and In Free Fall
  • Philip Roth - Nemesis
  • Benjamin Stein - The Canvas
  • Juan Pablo Villalobos - Down in the Rabbit Hole
  • Antonio Munoz Molina - El İnvierno en Lisboa
  • Juan Gabriel Vasquez - El Ruido de las Cosas…
  • Julian Barnes - A Sense of an Ending
  • Kim Edwards - The Memory Keeper’s Daughter
  • Alan Bradley - The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie
  • Mark Hodder - The Strange Affair of Spring Heeled Jack (my first steampunk)
  • Ahmet Hamdi Tanpınar - Saatleri Ayarlama Enstitüsü
  • Tezer Ozlu - Zaman Disi Yasam
  • Selçuk Baran - Bozkir Cicekleri
  • Baris Bicakci - Aramizdaki En Kisa Mesafe

For details and other books i read in 2013, click here.

What are your favorite books in 2013?