Submit a case to my Muse by providing the below information. My Muse will respond to the case and potentially describe how they would approach the investigation. These can be made-up cases or infamous ones like the Black Dahlia, Zodiac Killer, Jack The Ripper, and more!
THE CRIME(S): Murder, Robbery THE SCENE OF THE CRIME: Suburban Home in Los Angeles, CA THE VICTIM(S): Couple Bea O'Problem, 23, and Don Keigh, 22. THE WITNESSES: Sarah Nader (Neighbor) THE ACCUSED: Iona Mink (Bea’s Step-Sister) THE MYSTERY: Bea and Don were found dead in their apartment, both stabbed multiple times. No signs of a struggle or a break-in, but the safe in their bedroom was broken open and its contents were stolen. The neighbor heard a racket and called the police. Iona, the step-sister, was actually asleep upstairs the whole time and awoke to find the police in the house. She insists she is innocent and never heard any commotion.
An overly fit, sculpted, mostly half-naked, strutting, smooth-talking studmuffin Eldar attempts to save his race by collecting fragments of wraithbone to create the greatest weapon rumored to destroy Slaanesh (aka the Imperium’s biggest, most badass, self-destructing sex toy…no don’t ask what it is, its a SECRET) and reinstate their power. Along the way he meets hot, equally as scantily clad Mon’keighs, Drukhari, Tau, Ork, Necrons and tyranids all “eager to help” him win his cause and getting naughty along the way!!!
@sisterofsilenceWasn’t there a discourse not too long ago about Imperium porn? LMAO.
Angron bled from his mind. Blood cascading from his twitching form as the Nails bit harder than they ever had, his scream soundless as he stumbled through the ruins of the Eldar city his legion beseiged. Psykers…psykers…psykers…he hurt all over, but his head…his head was the worst, like it was about to detonate as a frag charge would. His fingers clawed into the ground, scoring gashes into the wraithbone as another jet of bile and blood rose into his mouth, splattering the ethereal compound with dark red and bubonic black as he retched.
Figures approached him, but he could not pay them heed through the pain they brought to his mind. “It is futile to struggle, mon’keigh.“ the lithe creature sneered, pulsing another wave of pain through his skull as he brought up his spear “I will put an end to the ruination that you will bring to the galaxy, here and now.“ Angron did not respond, the Primarch writhing and thrashing as a caged beast would until the Eldar began to charge his spear with eldrich energy.
The pain lifted, but just enough, and Angron’s scream became a bloodied roar, lashing out with a clenched fist that punctured the Eldar’s body as if he were little more than paper. The Eldar fell backwards, dead from the blow as Angron rose, only to collapse onto his back. He breathed heavy, the nails pulsed quieter now, still there in the background as a static in his mind.
WHHHHYYYY? Only because…well…I really can’t kill the other two. Plus I’ve been told she’s not exactly the nicest sooo…..she is fine as heck though, dang. I’m sure the Ynnari can bring her back to life.
Macha: That’s perfectly fine, Mon’Keigh, I’m saving myself for someone beyond your sad level anyway.
Fuck: Artemis Prima
Artemis: I am going to pretend I did not hear that.
Me: Okay you didn’t hear it.
Like Farseer Macha up there our sassy Primarch is f-i-n-e. Yeaaa I wouldn’t mind a roll in the hay with an 8 foot chick.
Yriel: You will speak to my Primarch with respect you impudent Mon’Keigh!
Why are there dang Aeldari here all of a sudden???
MARRY: CAPTAIN TITUS
Probably one of this finest specimens of Astarteshood that ever donned a blue and yellow gold armour. The man is the obvious choice for holy matrimony! Because why? WHY THE HELL NOT???? So tall, and handsome as hell….Now if only my name was Captain Mira this be a helluva lot easier….come here you!!! RESISTANCE IS FUTILE!!!
No matter how good the Farseer’s plan had sounded before, Elthinor suddenly felt a nagging doubt if the new paintjob would be enough to trick the Mon-Keigh warrior into accepting him as an Ultramarines veteran…
WARHAMMER 40K ENCONOMICS: Part III by xredninja (with additional material by TauMan942)
Xeno Scum Eldar: You have one cow, it is far better than those stupid mon-keigh cows; but you must now protect it at all costs! That is until the day the Laughing God arises as Ynnead and destroys the She-Who-Thirsts! But before that, the cow will probably pop off and join the Craftworld’s Infinity Circuit. You will then mourn the cow’s demise by singing ten-thousand year old songs of lament.
Dark Eldar: You had two cows, but one you have tortured, mutilated, killed and resurrected so many times, that it has now gone mad. The other cow you gave to your Haemonculus…‘Oh, fuck it I’m bored!’
Exodite Eldar: You have two cows that live with you in the forest. 'The moo cows are my friends. Don’t worry little moo cows, I’m like totally veggan!’ Sadly your dragon eats your new cow friends.
Orks: You 'az two of dem 'umie kowz, but den da Big Mek takes 'em bof to make 'um all proppa shooty like. Deyz all gettin’ grot brains to mak'em shoot bedda; and red paint jobs soz dey goez fasta!
Tyranids: First you have two gene stealer cows, then sixteen, then sixty-four…but now it is too late for the unsuspecting populace of the planet! 'It’s Game Over man, Game Over!’
Necrons: You have two cows. Phareon Poopoototek: 'After sixty million years asleep you bring me what?’ The two soulless robotic cows do not reply; but stand there with glowing green eyes and gauss weapons at the ready.
Squats: You have two cows. One you convert into a trike with turbo-charger and twin-linked melta guns. Then other cow is customized into a super secret high tech weapon system. 'Sssh, we were never here! You didn’t see anything! You didn’t hear anything! You-don’t-know-anything!’
Tau: We all have two cows, who are joyfully welcomed into the Tau Empire for the glorious unity of all cows, and for the Tau'Va – Greater Good! 'Just as planned!’