keg with no tap

halesstiles  asked:

16 for the prompts, please? I love your writing!

16. “I’ll kick his ass if you want me to.”

Derek didn’t hate being a bartender, he made good tips, the hours were flexible so he had time to rehearse with his band, and he was pretty good at it. What he did hate, was getting hit on by drunk people all night, and the drunker they got, the bolder they got. 

Tonight was no exception. It was Saturday which meant the bar was packed and Derek was busy enough that he could ignore the tall blonde guy that had been leering at him since he walked in with his friends a few hours prior. 

Around 1:30 the bar started to clear out, which made Derek breathe a sigh of relief, he was exhausted and they had been so busy that neither he, nor Erica could slip out from behind the bar to do any of the restocking that they needed to before they could leave tonight. 

Derek slipped out from behind the bar and made his way through the thinned out crowd to the back room where the beer cooler was. 

He changed three of the tapped kegs, grabbed a box and filled it with the liquors they needed, and then grabbed a case of beer before he slipped out the door and started back toward the bar. 

He had barely made it three feet before the blonde guy was approaching him. He walked faster, darting out of the man’s pack and got behind the bar before the guy could talk to him, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t stand there and talk while Derek tried to do his job.

“You’re too sexy to be a bartender,” The guy slurred out, leaning hard on the bar in a way that told Derek he had been over served. He shot Erica a look and she just shrugged and went back to wiping down the counter. 

“I think you could use some water,” Derek said instead of acknowledging the comment. He found the best way to deal with unwanted advances was to ignore them. 

“You’re a tall drink of,” the guy hiccuped, “Water.”

Derek set a plastic cup in front of the man and found his hand being grabbed, “Please let go.”

“I’ll never let go,” The guy said and then he giggled. Derek tugged his hand away and the guy said, “Don’t be like that baby, let me take you home.”

“No,” Derek said, voice firm. He was saved from any more comments by one of his regulars, Stiles, stepping up to the bar and leaning over so he and Derek could half hug. Stiles hadn’t been around much this week and Derek had missed him, “The usual?”

The guy looked between Stiles and Derek for a moment before muttering, “Has a fucking boyfriend,” and walking away. 

“I’ll kick his ass if you want me to,” Stiles said with a grin that made Derek’s stomach flip. 

“Nah, he’s just a drunk ass, I deal with them all the time,” Derek said with a smile. “You’re in here late.”

“I just got back from a business trip out west,” Stiles said, “And I couldn’t miss seeing your sunshiny face, not after not seeing you at all this week.”

“We’ve texted,” Derek said, “And Snapchatted.”

“It’s not as good as the real thing,” Stiles said with a wink. 

“If I didn’t know any better I’d think you were hitting on me,” Derek said, the smile still on his face. 

“If I was?”

“I’d be okay with it.”

“Then I am,” Stiles said, “Brunch tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Derek said, he could feel his ears burning and was grateful that it was dark in the bar. “I’ll text you my address, you can pick me up.”

“See you then,” Stiles said, leaning over the bar and kissing Derek on the cheek before he turned and left. The blonde guy glared at him as he walked away, but Derek barely saw him, he was too transfixed by Stiles.

Drabble Challenge: 1-150

I love my house, but… Bolson kinda dropped the ball with the exterior, didn’t he. I guess the sign with my name is okay, and having a front door is definitely a plus, but these scraggly flowers and randomly-placed saplings aren’t doin’ it for me.

It’s time for some home improvement!

Improvement the first: Toolie!

Toolie is a great addition to any home. Highly recommended.
…..You can’t have her she’s mine.

It’s not much of a wood pile, but it’s a start. Not only is wood useful for small carpentry projects, creating fires to heat the bath water, and beating your children, but a big ol’ pile of wood lends a home a certain rustic charm.

This pond is nice enough, and everyone loves a water feature… but with just water lilies, not very lively or dynamic, is it?

With the addition of some Sanke Carp straight from Kakariko Village, it’s become a koi pond! They, uh, seem to be a little tired from the long journey.

A nice shady spot like this is a fantastic place for a small mushroom farm. Hmm? Are those vagrants still hanging around?

Speaking of shady spots, a cool, dry place, preferably with a roof, is a good place to store your kegs. Remember, pickle barrels go vertical, wine casks go on their sides. You wouldn’t want to tap a keg only to take a swig of pickling brine!

anonymous asked:

I work as a cashier for a deli/butchers/liquor store, and we have local alcohol in kegs in the back of the store, by the butchers. Since I don't really know the guys working back there, it bothers me a lot when I see people with flasks in their pockets. Especially younger men. Because they boys in the back dont always replace the kegs right and put the taps so they're in front of the counter.

Zapfler Brewpub, Shanghai

Ever since the crackdown and closing of the Yong Kang Lu bar street last year, people here in Shanghai have been wondering whether their favorite watering holes would be opening up in new locations. Well, yesterday we found out first hand that Zapler Brewing has a brand spanking new brewpub in the old Datong Mill underground plaza, now renovated and renamed Found 158. We popped in for the pre-pre-opening party last night to check out the new space. Here’s a look…

The taps aren’t on yet, so the beers were served out of kegs with old school pump taps…

Their Bohemian pilsner was flowing when we arrived…

When they officially open, all their beers will be available on tap, as well as a few new brews they will rotate in as they brew them on premises…

This new Zapfler Brewpub will also feature a full kitchen where they’ll be serving a menu of German favorites, like warm pretzels, schnitzel and currywurst, which we go to sample…

Zapfler has also start distilling schnapps, which they’ll be selling and serving here as well…

They expect to be open and fully operational in the next few weeks so we’ll keep you posted. Prost!!


ZAPFLER BREWPUB

Inside Round 158

158 Julu Lu (near Ruijin Yi Lu)

Shanghai

China

                            N Y U G R E E K : E V E N T 0 0 1
                                
  BLACK LIGHT BASH ( HOSTED BY: RHO LAMBDA ALPHA )

“I came here to party, and i’m just getting started so everybody in here raise your glass; lets toast to a good night. Make these memories last.”

Exams are finished and the only thing left to do before summer takes over officially is go out with a bang, right? Of course, that’s what the guys over at Rho Lambda Alpha think and they are known to throw some legendary parties. With their fearless leader saying this would be one to remember who knows if that’s always a good thing. The kegs are tapped and the music is loud only thing left is for you to dance your way to the final rager of the year.

However this wouldn’t be a Rho Lambda party without a twist and this one its all about the blacklight and body paints. Mark your body with the paint and get ready to GLOW we know some of you are artistic while other stick to simple lines, your body is a canvas and this is your time to show it. Stepping into the party the only real thing to guide you will be the glow from your fellow party goers, at least that’s the excuse you can use when you are found kissing the wrong person.

Below the cut we have the rest of the details for this event !!

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Klaus Mikaelson - Time and a Place

Prompt: Could you do one where character of your choice Flirts with Y/N a at a ball and then klaus gets jealous because he likes Y/N so he starts flirting with her and distracting her from the other character while dancing and grinding, bit smuttyyy

Smut Warning?? my lovelies xxx

You had been positively dying to be invited to a Mikaelson Ball. Your friends hated every one of them, of course, but that didn’t make it any less fun to be there. You had told Elena that the real fun in going was the wonderful attire that you could don and how easy it was to be transported to an older time by just stepping over a threshold. This, quite obviously, was a lie. Not a complete lie, albeit, but a lie all the same. 

The one and only reason you wanted to go to ball full of bloodthirsty vampires, deadly witches and the occasional semi-dangerous werewolf, was Klaus Mikaelson; the hybrid to create all hybrids.

You had gone to extremely great and undoubtably embarrassing lengths to ensure that no one knew of your desire. Your friends all hated him and with good reason too. It was easy to believe that you were just shallow and were attracted to the old vampire-werewolf hybrid for the power he possessed or his riches or even his looks, a department in which he was not lacking. The truth however was that there was something so dangerous and alluring about the man that you couldn’t help but be drawn in. This incredibly selfish and innate feeling led to seeing Klaus at what easily could be described as his most vulnerable times.

You weren’t sure when he had first captured your attention but you were definitely fully aware of your feelings after you found him painting one day, his expert precision and practically pathological obsession with control intwining with his creative eyes to reveal beauty where nobody else would ever see it.

You couldn’t lie, however, watching Klaus across the large ornate hall, dressed in a suit with a white bow tie. He was extremely attractive and that must have been one of the reasons for your liking towards him. 

You bit your lip, staring at him hard and wondering what he could be thinking. You were under no illusion that you were nowhere on his radar. You were not beautiful and entrancing like Caroline or an underestimated threat like Bonnie and unlike Elena, you were not something he required desperately. You were just Y/N and although you knew that being you meant a lot of good things, those good things did not get you noticed by the man you had your sights set on.

“Hey, Y/N.” A familiar voice called. You were partially grateful for the distraction from your pity party but an uncharacteristic irritability rose inside you as you looked from Matt Donovan to the space where Klaus had been, now abandoned like your chances of seeing him again tonight among the multitudes of people invited. 

“Hello, Matt, how’s the party going?” You asked, keeping your voice level and trapping your annoyance inside yourself.

“It’s not really my scene.” He smiled warmly, fixing you with his eyes. 

“No keg taps or party poppers?” You replied dryly. As he laughed, you looked around, a strange sensation of being watched crawling over you as the back of your neck prickled. 

“Well I’ve still got my shirt on so I’d say this is far from my usual party.” He replied, smirking as he put air quotations around the word ‘party’.

“It’s very beautiful, though.” You responded, wanting to defend it. 

You both looked around, your eyes full of wonder as you scanned the amazing decor of the house. The traditionally of it was exquisite in itself but the soft, lulling music and dragging of ball gowns across the floor brought it to life, filling the air with a certain nostalgia.

“Not as beautiful as you.” Matt shot back, rendering you speechless. 

You went to thank him, sure that you had hurt him by your lack of response but a dark, sultry voice beat you to it. 

“Y/N does look very beautiful tonight, indeed.” 

You turned to face the voice that did not ring with familiarity but you knew well all the same but your motion was cut off by the hybrid’s hand around your waist.

“Thank you.” You spot softly, frowning in confusion and praying that your heart would not catch up to the events unfolding before you as you were sure Klaus would hear it’s beating a mile away like hooves upon a race track.

“It is merely the truth, love.” He spoke again, drawing your body closer to his. The warmth against your back surprised you but you did not pull away. With a small amount of sympathy, you watched Matt skulk away, champagne glass in hand.

“What are you doing?” You inquired, turning to klaus with your voice harsher and louder than intended. A few people turned their heads to look at you, none of them anybody you knew however. 

“Had a few too many, I think.” Klaus smirked, casting you a sideways glance as the spectators turned back away. 

His hands found their way to your hips and without a second’s notice, you were turned around, your back against his chest and his hands clasping your hips gently but securely in an unbreakable feather light grip.

“Now, Y/N.” Klaus whispered, leaning close to your ear, so close that his breath tickled the hairs at the base of your head; a teasing warmth. “I’ve seen you around a few times but I don’t think we’ve ever had a real conversation before.”

You shook your head in agreement, not trusting your voice under the circumstances.

“Well we’ll have to change that, won’t we?” He purred, bringing your hips back towards him, using you as a source of friction against his own hips. “You do look very beautiful tonight.”

You looked out at all the people in the hall, all of them blissfully unaware of how you were feeling, the position you were in with Klaus behind you. You didn’t concentrate on any of them, your mind a blur.

“Considering this is the perfect position for such activities…” He trailed off, grinding you against him once more, his lips moving closer and closer to your skin, gliding up and down your neck. “I’d like to ask you a few questions.”

“Is it true that you harbour feelings for me?”

You didn’t speak. You knew silence would be enough of an answer but speaking would have made it much worse. The feeling of him smirking against your neck gave you motivation however.

“Not at all.” You spoke, your voice unwavering and impressive, even to your own ears as you were once again pulled into his hips, a gentle rhythm flowing between you with his long fingers guiding the way.

“Very good.” He chuckled, moving his hand momentarily to sweep the hair from your neck before placing back in what felt like it’s rightfully position. “But your heart betrays you, love.”

You cursed in your head, unsure of where this was going or how you would get out of it. He could kill you. He could do anything he liked. Trusting him, a mistake, would most definitely cost you your life but you didn’t care how much what you were doing right now would affect your remaining sanity once it was over.

“We should definitely get started, my dear. I do believe that you are as excited as me to see what lies in store for us.”

The Taste of "Lava" Soap

by Samsaran 

Yes, I actually did once have my mouth washed out with soap. It was when I was six years old and my Dad and a couple of his army buddies were restoring a 1936 Roadster in our garage. My Dad also had taken to home brewing beer so he had a pony keg on tap. 

Now they would start out in dead earnest working on that car for about the first half hour. Then, they’d tap the keg and start swapping stories. Now, this was boy heaven for me. My Dad would say “son, grab me that ¾ inch socket would ya” and I would scurry over with it and feel so helpful and grown up.

I knew I had to stay inconspicuous as they got warmed up though. The stories would get raunchier and the language saltier as the day progressed. Now I did not understand much of what was said but I did know that Marlene the receptionist had some “serious Gazongas” which I figured to be either a kind of drum or maybe a pet bird like a parrot.

 All I know I sure wanted to see them whatever they were because my Dad and his friends were awfully impressed. Well, after a point they forgot all about me and the profanities got more and more intense.

Now, I didn’t really understand that these were “dirty” words. I knew the “S” word and had a vague idea that there was an “F” word but I had no idea what it meant. I did know that they had a favorite word they used for just about everything that required emphasis. 

So, one fine day after a day of “working” in the garage my Mom came in and asked me if I knew where her guest towel had gotten off to (I used them for superhero capes) and I replied: “no Mom I have no idea where that c********r is”. 

The earth stood still. 

My Mom’s jaw dropped. Then she looked at my Dad and his buddies who tried to look ashamed while stifling hysterical laughter. My Mom snatched me up and stuck a greasy bar of Lava soap in my mouth gave my Dad a look that could curdle milk and stomped back into the kitchen.

Now, Lava soap isn’t that bad. It is a bit grainy but the flavor is downright delicate. My Dad took the bar out of my mouth and put it in his own mouth. Then each of the men took put the bar in their mouths. You see, we men stick together.

They’re still not talking about it, not really. The locker room is neutral: don’t look. (Or rather, don’t get caught looking.)

Haus parties are not neutral. Not when Nursey wears a crop top and faded blue jeans with a thick leather belt. Not when Dex rolls the cuffs of his shirt up above his elbows. Not when they’ve started growing their playoff beards.

They dance together. It’s crowded and hot. The bass is low, bone-rattling. They think no one sees them in the crowd. Dex presses his fingers to Nursey’s hipbones and pulls him back against him. 

They’re of a height: Dex can hook his chin over Nursey’s shoulder as they grind.

“Upstairs?” he asks.

They’re pressed so close together Dex feels Nursey shiver. “Yeah.”

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The Wild Lupin. (Young! Sirius Black x Lupin! Reader)

Imagine: Y/N Lupin is Remus’ younger sister by three minutes, her parents sent her off to Beauxbatons Academy of Magic until she bugged them into makng her going to Hogwarts. Going to Hogwarts, Y/N was sorted into Ravenclaw.
P.S: It’s sixth year, and a bit modern. I have no idea how parties worked back then

Part II

Warning: party,drinking and body shot. Sorry if it sucks or not like it should be, first time to write stuff like this.
————————————————————————————————–

Originally posted by pleasingpics

Y/N Lupin walked to Dinner with confidence in her step, making a lot of boys convert their undivided attention on her making her smirk.
Y/N is going into sixth year, even though it’s her first time to go to Hogwarts. She was sorted privately in the Headmaster’s office. She’s in Ravenclaw.

Y/N locked eyes with her brother, Remus Lupin, who sat beside his friends, James Potter, Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew. Just seeing the flames in her brother’s eyes due to the male population eyes’ roaming her body made her smirk wider.

Y/N’s the definition of wild. She may not break many rules, but give her Vodka, music and people and she will turn any place into a wild party. However, there was one thing she was missing from this definition, not having sex with anyone.
Y/N was raised to have self-respect, to not be a toy for anyone. But she did like the attention, she did like to make people know that they can’t have her.

“Bloody hell. I could just take her right here, right now with all these people watching”

Sirius growled as his eyes roamed Y/N’s figure. Sirius had been known for his player ways.

“That’s my sister you git”

Remus hissed as he stared at his friend in disbelief

Your sister? She is your sister?”

Sirius asked, a look of pure shock on his face. Remus talked about his sister but he never imagined her this …………..phenomenal.

It has been 4 months into school, and Y/N was craving a party.

“Remmy”

Y/N called for her brother as she saw him from the corner of her eyes. Closing the book she was reading she headed towards her brother, as he did the same. Both meeting halfway.

“Hey there, smart pants”

Remus smirked, his sister loathed that nickname, but hence she got in Ravenclaw it was kind of true. Y/N scoffed at her brother’s nickname, but she focused on why she called him over instead of having a meaningless fight.

“I want to party”

Y/N blurted out

“And?”

Remus asked as an eyebrow flew upwards.

“You know what, I’m talking to James Potter and Sirius Black”

And with that said, Y/N headed towards the three Marauders

“Well, hello there handsome”

Y/N smirked at Sirius Black as she placed her hand on his shoulder. Sirius smirked and placed his arm around her lower back, but Y/N slapped his hand away and leaned forward, her lips brushing over his ears, making him shiver in pleasure

“I am the one in control”

Biting a bit on his earlobe, Sirius’ breath hitched in his throat.

“Anyway”

Y/N cleared her throat 

“I need to have a party, and considering Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs won’t be too happy about me making a party in their common room, and me hating the Slytherins to not even bother asking, I’ve got to throw a party in the Gryffindor common room”

Everyone stared at her like she is crazy, no one talked, no one moved, nothing.

“Great" 

Y/N smiled and clapped her hands 

"Party tomorrow in the Gryffindor common room at midnight”

Y/N straightened herself up 

“I’ll see you then guys” 

And with that she walked away, punching Sirius’ ass making the boy straighten up and his eyebrows shot up in surprise.

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spooky-klauser  asked:

what if, hear me out...karamatsu's s/o liked using pick up lines like he did. But they weren't all romantic, they were just straight up like 'YOUR ASS IS GRASS AND I'M GONNA MOW IT' 'IS THAT A KEG IN YOUR PANTS CUZ I WANNA TAP THAT ASS' etc. because i think that would be the bEST,,,

i hope the s/o is ready for a furiously blushing and very thirsty Karamatsu, because he would absolutely get a hard-on from that. and it’s a thing that always works. especially if whispered into his ear. 

My Always and Forever

This is my entry for @iwantthedean YouAU challenge.

Characters: RPF Jensen Ackles, Me (Joy), Mentions of the Ackles, Padaleckis, and a few others. Can be read as a reader insert as it is 1st POV

Words: 3105

Warnings: Fluff and angst

A/N: Please remember this is fiction.  No harm was meant to anyone.  This is just where my pen lead me.   Feedback always appreciated.

Forever tags: let me know if you want on or off   @whispersandwhiskerburn  @wi-deangirl77  @smoothdogsgirl  @zombi3gyrl07  @laurenw1025  @ashleymalfoy @iamflanneltrash  @kristaparadowski  @mrswhozeewhatsis  @plaidstiel-wormstache @atc74 


Jensen Ackles is my best friend.


When I was born in Dallas, Texas on March 2, 1978, my crib mate had already been chosen for me.  My mother and Donna Ackles were best friends and coincidentally, next door neighbors.


Being one day older, Jensen, “J”, had declared long ago that he was the boss.  Our mothers always said the competition between us started the day I was born.  He walked first.  I spoke first, “J” being my first word.  From there we tried to outdo each other in everything.  Who could climb higher, run faster, be better.  We pushed each other to be our best.

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Dadbod: Part 5

I watched from my window as Kevin’s wife and kids piled into an SUV and drove away. I paced around my house and tried to find distractions while I awaited Kevin’s text inviting me over. I’d bought a few things in preparation for the coming days: a funnel feeder, a small keg, and some appetite enhancers. My dick was throbbing in anticipation.

My phone finally went off and it was him. He told me to “cum” over in two hours at 6pm. I was beyond frustrated. I’d already been dripping with lust all day and two hours seemed like an eternity. I peeked out my window to spy and saw Kevin pull out of his driveway and zoom away. I anxiously passed time by watching TV, but continued to keep an eye on the window. When Kevin returned he parked in the driveway instead of the garage. He wanted me to see him. He began to unload one massive bag of groceries after another. The bags were stuffed full with boxes of cookies, chips, and other treats. He must have made five trips between the car and the house. Once he was done I received another text. “Piggy is waiting.” The sun had begun to set and I eagerly wheeled over the keg and other supplies in the darkness. He opened the door before I knocked.

“Why’d you get a small one,” he said nodding towards the keg.

I was speechless and he motioned me inside. I took a seat on the couch, and noticed a picture of his family sitting nearby.

“I bought $300 worth of groceries.” He said forcefully. “My wife will be back in three days. All of this needs to be gone before then.”

Once again, Kevin had left me in complete shock. There was an immense amount of food in the house. I didn’t know if it would be possible for one man, who was just beginning to develop a little pot belly, to consume all this food. However, Kevin did look a good eight pounds heavier than when I saw him a week ago at the buffet.

“If you can handle that,” I said.

“Piggy can handle it.” He declared.

I tapped the keg and we both began drinking. I looked through his groceries and decided to make a macaroni and cheese casserole for the night, plus there were two store bought cakes and a few dozen pints of ice cream for desert. The casserole was easy to make and high in fat.  While it was cooking, I fixed Kevin a chocolate milkshake with weight gain powder and crushed up appetite enhancers inside. I guesstimated there was about 1,500 calories in the shake alone and he downed it pretty quickly.

I was taken aback that night by how much Kevin could eat. I barely had to encourage him—he was plowing through food like he was preparing for hibernation. We fucked multiple times throughout the night, which were the only moments when there wasn’t food in his mouth. Around midnight and after our fifth orgasm, I slid off his cock and laid on the floor exhausted. He remained on the couch and belched.

“Is that all you got?” he asked.

I nodded.

“In that case, I’m not sure this weekend will work out. Tomorrow morning you will have a game plan for how you are going to turn me into a fat, dirty, hog over the next two days.”

Somewhat nervous, I fell asleep with images of Kevin’s ballooning gut in my mind. The next morning it had all become clear.  I knew exactly how I was going to turn Kevin into the pig he desired to become.

When Kevin woke up I ushered him downstairs into the dining room. I had spent all morning covering the table with delicious food. The main course was chocolate chip waffles smothered in whipped cream, Nutella, and maple syrup. I had crushed up appetite enhancers and mixed them into the waffle batter– not that Kevin needed them. He didn’t speak a word and began chowing down immediately. A soupy mixture of the waffle toppings dripped from his chin onto his belly which was quickly becoming distended. The grunting and snorting noises emanating from Kevin’s mouth had me captivated. I had never seen a man behave like such a slovenly fat ass before. It wasn’t long until most of the food from the table was cleared and I was massaging Kevin’s bloated belly in an effort to make room for more.

“So,” he began, “I asked you last night-“ Kevin stopped to let out a belch and I jumped in.

“Oh, I have a plan,” I said, “but I’m not sure if you’ll be able to handle it. There is enough ice cream in this house for you to consume one pint every other hour until your wife gets back. That’s about nine pints a day.”

“That’s all you got?” Kevin asked indignantly.

“I’m not done. The ice cream will be melted and funnel fed into your greedy mouth. And when I’m not pouring calories down your throat you will be eating whatever I bring you. Oh, and you can’t leave the couch. That’s your new pig pen, fatty. You are only allowed to get up to use the toilet. No showers. No change of clothes. You are now my fat, smelly, piglet that’s going to eat and fuck whenever I say so. Clear?”

Kevin nodded his head and I went to the kitchen to grab the funnel and a pint of melted double fudge ice cream.

“Open up,” I muttered.

I poured the ice cream faster than I knew Kevin could handle and watched tears form in the corner of his eyes. This was the first time I’d ever seen him let on that he was too full. Once the ice cream was gone I couldn’t resist his bloated, sweaty body. I peeled off the skin-tight tank top that had been sticking to his stomach and began dry humping his belly. The harder I thrust the louder his groans became and the more he burped. His breath smelled like chocolate and I kept finding dried clumps of syrup/nutella mixture in his body hair. Before I knew it, his dick was inside of me and I could hear his belly sloshing with each thrust. I pulled him out of me and eased my cock into his hairy hole. He let out a surprisingly loud moan. I grabbed a nearby can of whipped cream and kept his mouth full of calories as I went to town. After a few minutes Kevin slapped the can out of my hand and demanded real food. I ran to the kitchen and returned with a box of Twinkies. I stuffed his mouth with one Twinkie after another. I was getting pretty close to coming and when Kevin let out a momentous burp I couldn’t hold back. I came so much that Kevin was no less cream filled than one of the Twinkies.

The rest of the day was filled with gluttony and lust. I could tell I was pushing Kevin to eat beyond what was comfortable for his body. I didn’t care. In fact, that night I hatched a plan to torture the fat pig even more.

Five kisses that should have been, and one that was

Katniss and Peeta keep meeting on New Year’s Eve. Unfortunately, it’s just never the right time.


New Year’s Eve, 2013

Weaving around the patches of frat brothers and sorority sisters stationed throughout the Phi Kappa Tau house, Katniss clutches her Solo cup to her chest as if it’s some precious thing and not merely the vehicle to get the cheap keg beer into her mouth. It’s empty anyway, the plastic crinkling under the pressure of her fingertips, but still, it’s a comfort to her amid the sea of mostly unknown faces.

It’s a fluke that she’s here–really, it’s a fluke that she knows Finnick Odair, who invited her. They met in their water aerobics class this past semester, Katniss looking to take a fun PE class that kept her active, Finnick needing an easy PE credit so he can graduate in the spring. 

She hadn’t liked him at first. He was cocky and brash and a show-off and a perpetual flirt. Still is, actually. But she warmed up to him. For some reason he took an interest in her, even though she’s a mere sophomore, and they eventually became pretty good friends. She’s still convinced he mostly talks to her just to annoy her, though.

So here she is, a fish out of water at the Phi Kappa Tau New Year’s Eve party. Dateless. She’d convinced her friend Madge to come with her, at least, for safety reasons, but Madge is doing her damnedest to find a willing pair of lips to kiss at midnight.

Katniss couldn’t care less. All she wants is a nice buzz to ring in the New Year.

She dodges a couple of laughing drunk guys stumbling out of the kitchen as they pound each other on the back and high five. One looks a little gray in the face, like he might puke. She’s relieved to find the keg free of any line, and she grabs the hose, aiming the nozzle into her cup.

“You might not want to do that.”

She looks up across the kitchen at a guy standing at the counter. Blond, wavy hair, blue eyes, rueful smile. He’s dressed in gray slacks and a black sweater. 

She frowns, confused. “Why not?”

He nods his head in the direction she came. “They just did keg stands off it.” The drunk guys she just passed, he means. She blinks, not really understanding his point. She’s not sure if she even knows what a keg stand is. He turns to face her more, hand braced on the counter, his smile widening, carving a dimple in his cheek. “Meaning their mouths were all over that.”

“Oh.” Wrinkling her nose in disgust, she drops the hose, not exactly keen on putting her mouth anywhere near where a couple of frat boys’ mouths have been. “Thanks for the heads up. I guess.” Except now how is she going to get that buzz?

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spoiled

pairing: pansy parkinson x marcus flint x oliver wood

setting: modern, non-magical, university AU

word count: 989

a/n: look, @provocative-envy​ got this trash ot3 stuck in my head and then I drank a beer and I can’t sleep so now you all get to reap the rewards. beware no proofreading to follow!!
ao3 link - if you’re into that kind of thing!

Pansy Parkinson always got what she wanted. Ever since she had been a child, from the pony she had begged her father for (it stank so, so badly) to the car at sixteen (not, of course, that she could drive very well) to her spot on the varsity cheerleading squad (that one had been easy), she got what she wanted.

Which was why, when she realized she wanted Marcus Flint, resident lacrosse team captain and general asshole, she figured it wouldn’t take that much work. All she would need to do would be to get him alone, twirl a strand of her currently-dyed-green hair around her finger, pop her bubblegum pink lips at him, and bam.

Pansy was not used to not getting what she wanted.

The first party that she’d seen him at, she sauntered over in her too-high heels and too-short skirt and simpered and giggled and he’d played along for a bit, kissing her neck and grinding against her on the ‘dance’ floor. When she tried to pull him up the stairs though, he kissed her hand and told her she was drunk and should probably go and have some water and a nap, and then slipped out the front door, not before slipping a scrap of paper with his number on it down the front of her bra.

At the second party, Pansy’s foolproof plan of pursuing Marcus hit a small snag. That small snag was a lithe baseball player by the name of Oliver Wood, who kept catching her eye across the room and running his hand through his short blonde hair like he didn’t realize how ridiculous it looked. The problem, of course, with always getting what you want is that you have to know what you want first.  

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You ever wonder what we could have been? (Oswald Cobblepot x Reader) - Chapter 2

Originally posted by raininginthenight

Summary: You and Oswald meet for the first time.

Tags: @gotham-after-dark @femalepenguini @penguinsweetest @red-panda-on-the-loose @misfitgirl3390 @amandajuly81 @ascoolasathestral @aya-fay @taintedmarker @millicentcordelia

Part 1    Part 3    Part 4    Part 5    Part 6

Warnings: None.

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