keep calm and exercise

anonymous asked:

Do all your weapons have names?

nah, i go through weapons too quickly for that. i do have some favorites though, that have been with me for a while, which have picked up nicknames. there’s a real nasty grenade launcher that i frequently use to make holes in buildings that clint insists on calling my ‘lockpick’ as if i dont know how to break in like a normal assassin. i know how to pick a lock clint. exploding stuff is just more fun.

 i have a set of sweet little throwing knives that natasha usually calls the manicure kit. i would object to that more if they didnt come in handy so often on nail painting night. 

i have a regular claw hammer which has seen combat and is officially named the ‘Hammer Of Barnes.” thor blessed it for me. i dont know if that makes it more effective in a fight but it is pretty cool. 

i have a big trench knife that has been called ‘mantra’ after that one time when Dr banner was about to hulk out in a hospital ward because it was being attacked by hydra agents. clint was trying (poorly) to keep him calm, and was yelling ‘do your breathing exercises!! use your mantras!!’ at which point Dr banner grabbed my knife and stabbed a hydra guy. he did not hulk out. we were very proud of him.

i once told tony that my fists were named ‘business’ and ‘pleasure’ but i was just messing with him. his face was pretty priceless. 

but my favorite named weapon has always been my throwing steve. by which i mean the captain america that i sometimes physically hurl at my enemies. it may not be the most dignified way to get steve into a fight but it sure is effective

Alex Going Rogue on Emily

“Look, Alex, I just wanna be alone, okay? It’s not… it’s not you, I just… I just need to be alone.”

Alex swallows rage and Alex swallows the desire to scoop Maggie into her arms and never let her go, ever. To kiss her every scar and to extract her every pain.

But she needs to listen better.

Because Maggie needs to be heard.

So Alex hears, and Alex drops her off, and Alex kisses her good night, and tells her to call if she changes her mind.

She knows she won’t.

She thinks about heading home herself for about .38 seconds. But she’s driving to the Baldwin before she even consciously decides to.

She leans on a pole and she checks her watch and she tries some of those breathing exercises from this morning to keep her somewhat calm, to keep her able to talk instead of punch, to keep her able to speak instead of scream.

Even though her blood boils when she sees her. Even though her body is running through all one hundred six ways she knows how to kill someone with her bare hands.


God is she suddenly grateful for those damn yoga breathing exercises.

“Alex, right?”

“Yeah. I wanted to come… see you. I wanted to talk to you, just to see if…”

She takes a step closer and she’s almost grateful when Emily starts speaking, because she might have just punched her instead of finishing her sentence.

“Look, if this is about missing dinner – “

“Why didn’t you show up?” Her voice is low and her voice is death, and she can’t sink her fists into Maggie’s father, so Emily will have to do. For now.

“I should’ve, but… the whole situation, it just brought up too many painful memories.”

“What about Maggie? All the things you said to her back then, that wasn’t painful?” She wants to say more. She wants to say so much more. Do so much more.

She doesn’t, because she doesn’t want to make things worse for Maggie. But god, god, god, does she want to.

“Everything that I said to her, she had coming.”

“She dedicated five years of her life to you, and you bailed on her.” Her voice feels like it does before she splits her knuckles on prisoner’s faces, before she drops bombs that blow up buildings she’s still standing in.

“I bailed on her? Seriously, that’s – that’s what she told you? – she cheated on me.”

The bottom drops out of Alex’s stomach and the fight goes out of her gut.

And suddenly she’s picturing Maggie in bed with Emily, in bed with Darla, hell, in bed with her yoga instructor, naked and writhing, screaming someone else’s name.

Someone’s name that isn’t hers.

She gulps and she hates herself because she’s done it again.

Caused someone pain. Again.

Failed. Again.

“I’m sorry, I… I didn’t know.”

She can’t look at her, at this woman with hair that’s only just a little redder than hers, with a voice just a little deeper than hers, with a body just a little more perfect than hers.

This woman who Maggie apparently cheated on.

And Alex knows it’s true.

Knows because she knows Maggie.

Knows because she knows what Maggie is like when she’s scared.

Knows what Maggie is like when she hates herself more than she usually does.

“I shouldn’t have said anything.”

Alex isn’t looking at her, so she doesn’t see the way Emily’s eyes run up and down her body, just once, quickly. Just once, imagining Maggie underneath her, on top of her, whatever she’s feeling these days, and she can see why Maggie chose this woman. This woman who just wanted to defend her.

This woman she’s apparently lying to.

And she knows Alex knows it, because when she looks up, her eyes are wide and terrified and regretful.

“I just… really wanna forget about it.”

Because that shell-shocked look on Alex’s face?

She wore that look for almost two whole years.

She only just recently stopped wearing it all the time.

Alex looks off to the side because she can’t look into the eyes of the woman Maggie slept with, spent five years probably doting on, and then cheated on.

“Sorry, I… I’mma go.”

She doesn’t give Emily a chance to say anything else.

She can’t hear anything else.

She just walks.

She walks and she walks, and she takes out her phone and she calls her sister.

petesass  asked:

hi there friendo i heard u were accepting requests for mm headcanons and i being the gay shit i am, i'm here to do a request. trans boi mc accidentally breaks his binder/stp and gets upsetti spaghetti but RFA + saran wrap get them a new one/comfort them!! soz this is weird i'm just a trans boy that needs someone w good writing skills to make my dreams of a trans boy come true tbh ok adios bye ademain oh yikes this was long

I’m sorry this took so long to post. I wanted to make your dreams come true so I pushed myself to finish this.

NOTE: I had done some research on the matter, and I was informed about the bandage thing. Wrapping bandages is NOT a permanent solution for binding if you’re going to and or thinking of doing it. I wrote it in the sense as a temporary solution for the problem but it is BAD to do on the regular. Like it just can fuck you up. Probably best to avoid using it as an option for binding. I just want people to be safe ^^. And thank you whoever brought it to my attention.


  • based on your texts, you weren’t having such a fantastic day
  • when you came home, he could tell you were tired and stressed
  • you said you were just going to go lay down for an hour so he just let you be
  • a while later he heard you shouting profanities in the other room
  • when he went to go check up on you, you were sitting on the bed with your head hung low and your fingers in your hair
  • looking at the ground, he noticed your broken binder
  • more like you’re only binder
    • never knew how much they cost and kind of understood having just one???
  • while you’re stewing in your own anger and sadness, you feel someone tap your shoulder
  • when you look up, this nugget brought a roll of bandages for you
  • “Let me help you wrap up. Is that okay?”
  • you have to help him a bit because his hands get tangled
    • those butterfingers
  • texts or calls throughout the day to make sure you’re doing okay
    • not just because you were upset but for the wrap
    • wants to make sure it’s still in good condition
  • wants to understand the process so he sits with you as you’re shopping for a new one
    • yeah wow they’re pretty damn expensive
    • but would rather you have more than one so you’re not in a BIND later wINK WONK 


  • it was just a normal morning for you
  • but the one thing you’ve been dreading happened
  • a few months ago you realized how shitty you’re binder has got over the year
  • you told yourself you would get a replacement but since your current one still did its job, you put it on the back burner
  • and then eventually forgot about it
  • which brings you back to now
  • as you were putting it on it just snapped 
  • you didn’t think it would have a great affect on you
  • but the anxiety started to settle in 
  • you couldn’t stand to look at yourself in the mirror
  • Jaehee realizes you’ve been in the bathroom for a while and asked if you were alright
  • “Yeah it’s just…let me come out?”
  • when you leave the bathroom, she sees the broken binder and your long face
  • this was the first time she was in this situation and wasn’t sure EXACTLY what to do
  • she just takes the binder and gives you a nice long hug
  • when you say you don’t want to leave the apartment, she doesn’t object
    • you seemed kind of shaken by this so she wanted to make sure you were comfortable
  • when she gets home she shows you the binders she ordered for you because she’s a perfect gelato


  • you were at school/work for a few hours when you started to get pain in your torso
  • it was beginning to become really painful so you snuck off into the bathroom to remove your binder for a bit before you had to head back
  • but as you were putting it back on, it snapped 
  • and with that, you snapped
  • after panicking for five minutes, you decide to call Zen
  • “Hey babe. You usually don’t call me around this time. Lucky for you I’m on break, how are you?”
  • before you even spoke, he could tell something was wrong
    • your heavy breathing could be heard from across the room for goodness sake
  • the moment you asked to come over and bring your spare binder, he darted right out of rehearsal
  • it gave you enough time to continue your panic attack before you heard someone come through the bathroom
  • thankfully it was Zen
  • you opened the stall with your hand out and as he was handing you the other binder, he asked if you were alright
  • you didn’t feel like you wanted to say anything so you closed the door once the binder was in your hands
  • Zen didn’t leave, he just waited for you to come out and once you did
  • he wiped any remaining tears away with his handkerchief
  • cleaned your face with some water then held you closely
  • doesn’t want to see his precious MC so upset! just wants you to feel better ^^


  • with this donut’s love to pamper you
  • among your matching tailored suits, you have some pretty good quality binders in your drawers
  • and you had to admit, they were good quality binders
  • but you would take those words back very soon
  • you were feeling kind of nauseous at work/school so you went to go take it off for a few minutes but it snapped as you were taking it off
  • now you were freaking out because you would have to walk out of the bathroom without one and the EYES TO JUDGE WOULD BE UPON YOU
  • after ralphing for a hot minute you get a call from Jumin
    • donut has really good sense of timing
  • you felt up to talking so you picked up the phone
  • “Hey Jumin, how’s Hong Kong?”
  • “Is everything alright?”
  • super Jumin was able to tell something was up with you
    • even could tell you just vomited?
  • you told him what was wrong
    • he starts writing down shit because he was going to sue the fucking company that made your binder
    • no matter how you insist not to, you know he’s going to do it anyways
  • calls Jaehee to go get you one of your other binders and bring it to you
  • while you’re waiting, he keeps you on the phone to calm you down
  • has you do some breathing exercises and gives you positive affirmations
  • once you were calm you talk about his trip for a bit until you hear Jaehee’s voice


  • you worked really hard on the RFA party on the vineyard tomorrow
  • and you laid out your outfit for the occasion
    • figured you could just wear your only binder no big deal
  • then as you were getting ready for bed, Seven is lying in bed while on his phone when he hears a snap from the bathroom
  • “MC?”
  • when you don’t respond, he gets out of bed to check up on you
  • he sees you sitting on the bathroom tiles with your broken binder in your hands
  • “The RFA party is tomorrow…”
  • oh god
  • “And this is my only binder…”
  • insert mini freak out
  • before you could escalate, he sits down with you and keeps an arm around your shoulder
  • calms you down with those kind words of his
  • jellybean doesn’t want you uber stressed out or get worried over spilled milk
  • brings you to bed and makes sure you fall asleep first before he did
  • when the big day comes around, he get a bunch of bandages to wrap you up
    • kind of gets carried away when he helps wraps you
  • during the party comes around to you when you were free to make sure you’re doing ok


  • Saeran was just chilling on his bed while listening to some tunes
  • not a care in the world
  • he could have sworn he had heard something earlier but didn’t pay too much mind to it
  • when he heard something again, he took out one of his earbuds
  • turns out you were calling for him this entire time
  • didn’t even know you were here O_O
    • you were soaking wet from the rain and you wanted to be somewhere dry and warm
    • which is why you decided to stop by your boo’s place for some clothes
  • jumps out of bed and rushes to you in the bathroom to find your broken binder on the floor
  • oh shit
  • you weren’t looking too good either
  • pulls you out of the bathroom and to his room
  • gives you some of his clothes 
    • gumdrop gives you privacy as you’re changing
  • when you’re fully clothed, he has you lay down next to him while listening to some music
  • doesn’t really say anything but you felt a lot better having him there to get your mind off of it
  • it was okay since you were wearing mostly all day, it was nice to let your body breathe for a bit 

anonymous asked:

Boys of your choice finally working up the courage to talk to their crush, but their crush just became 1000% more intimidating to talk to bc they're wearing something a bit more revealing or cute today. (Not naughty or anything when I say revealing, maybe they run into them on their way to the pool and it's the first time seeing them in a swimsuit or something)

(For this one, I went with Junkrat, Roadhog, and Zenyatta)

Keep reading

Is that difficult to understand this? I’m sorry for Wanda, she suffered and she was scared BUT WHY THE HELL TONY EVEN IN CIVIL WAR IS THE ONLY ONE WHO IS RESPONSIBLE ABOUT SOKOVIA. WHY. I DON’T CARE WANDA IS A TEEN SHE SHOULD KNOWS HER POWERS ARE TOO STRONG FOR HER and she needed to keep calm and “exercise” before she makes the decision she is a superhero. Even in Civil War when Tony talks with Steve and Tony is totally devasted about all those shitty things that are happening he said “and then Ultron, my fault.” and I was WTF. NO. IT’S NOT. this thing really piss me off because when it’s about Tony I always try to understand who is against him BUT NOT FOR ULTRON. NO WAY. You can say everything about Tony but you can’t say he doesn’t care about the others and you can’t say he doesn’t feel guilty about things he has done and yeah those things just ended in a catastrophy BUT NOT FOR HIS FAULT. IN AGE OF ULTRON TONY IS AS BROKEN AND DEPRESSED AS WANDA so why he has to take all the guilt? It’s not fair, at all. People have to understand that he only does his best. Always. And he always makes things better for everyone. He has heart. He thinks and cares about who he loves and about people and FOR GOD’S SAKE LET HIM BE HAPPY AND IN PEACE WITH HIMSELF JUST FOR ONCE. PLS.

Warnings: violence and torture.
Request by anon

The only thing you remember is that you was walking home when you felt something hit hard against your head and everything went black. When you woke up you were in what looked like a hold of some abandoned place, her wrists were tied in a rope that was tied to the ceiling and their feet barely touched the ground.

“ Look who woke up. ” You heard a voice say behind you but you could not turn around to see who it was, and did not have to, you know very well that voice, was Damon.

“ Damon, what are you doing? ” You asked, trying to loosen the wrists.

“ First of all Y / N I know you’re new to this thing of being a witch, so if you are planning on doing any spell to get out of here I suggest you give up, I tear your pretty little head before you try.” Now he was in front of you, he looked like an emotional mess. Maybe lose Elena had done this to him. It was then that you realized why you were there.

“ It looks like I will not have to explain why you’re here, is not it? ” He said tightening your chin tightly.

“ Damon, please don’t. ” You whispered not knowing what to say.

“ I have not even started my dear. ” He turned to get something on top of a table.

“ Damon, I’m sorry for Elena but I can not help. ” You whispered trying to calm him. But that seemed to leave him angrier.

“ You’re sorry? ” He used the vampire acceleration and was now in front of you with a knife near your neck. “ That’s why you left town with Kai, because you’re sorry? ” He pressed the knife harder against his neck and cut a little. “ Damon do not do it, think of Elena, she would not like to see you like this.” You whispered trying to hide the pain in the neck. “Do not speak of her.” He shouted near your face, you just did not fall because it was stuck. “ I’m doing this because I want her back and you will help me. ” He whispered. “ Your boyfriend thought helping Jo and giving up the plan to end his family would be enough to redeem himself, but my girlfriend is still unconscious. ” He looked so peaceful that it was almost scary. “ He did what he could. ” You whispered moving a little. His wrists were hurting  and your  arms were going numb because of the awkward position. “ Then you know something, you will tell me. ” He went on knife point in his cheek. “ It would be a pity if I hurt this pretty face. ” “ Damon Please let me go, I do not know anything.” you begged but he ignored you. “ You know, I have to admit that Kai has a good taste for women. ” He bent down and made a cut on your leg. “ Will he still like you when I’m done with you? ”

“ Damon I swear, I can not help.” You cried as he continued to cut you. “ I know that at some point you will talk, all confess at some point. ” He said looking at you. “ I do not know anything I sw- ” before you could finish him hit your face hard and you could taste blood in your mouth.


You do not remember at what time you passed out. You woke up, his eyes were blindfolded and his entire body ached. After a few minutes you felt a hand press your face, and you contorted with sudden touch.

“ Shhh baby, it’s me. ” Kai took the sale of his eyes and began to untie her wrists. “ Kai, how did you find me ?. ” “ Spell. ” He said holding you so you do not fall. You could barely stand. “ Come on baby, I’ll take you home. ” He took you in his arms in bride style.

When he got home Kai took you straight to the bedroom and put you in bed. He began to pace back and forth talking about something you could not understand. He took off his coat, threw in the corner and made a primitive scary noise that seemed to come directly from his chest. He seemed to have forgotten that you were still in the room and started breaking everything that was in front. You had seen Kai angry, but never like this. He was scaring you. He took one of the bottles of perfume that was on the dresser and played against the mirror making you scream with fright. He came out of the trance of rage and saw that you were huddled in the corner of the bed crying. He took a deep breath, walked up to you and bent down next to the bed so that he could stay on your height. “ Hey need not be afraid, everything is fine. ” He said but you did not. He was still a panting mess. “Y / N looks at me, I would never hurt you.” He taking the hair from your face. “I know, sorry. You scared me.” You whispered trying to calm down. “ No need to apologize baby. Let’s clean you up. ” Him up, he took you in his arms and took you to the bathroom. “ Can you stand up? ” Yes. “ He put you down and went to the bath and turned on the water. He walked back to you and took your shirt to take but you walked away. ” You know I I’ve seen everything you have there is not? “ He said approaching you. ” I do not want you to see me like that. “ You said ashamed. ” I will not leave you alone, “ he said holding to your face with his large hands. ” Let me take care of you. “ You nodded. He took off your shirt slowly to not hurt you. You heard him take a deep breath when he saw the bruises and cuts scattered around your belly and rib. He took off your bra and you automatically covered breasts. He bowed and took your shoes one at a time and then pulled his jeans along with her panties. You had cuts around the feathers. Whenever Kai looked at you he closed his eyes and breathed, looked like a kind of exercise to keep calm and stay here watching over you instead of going behind Damon and rip his head. He got you to the bathtub and helped you to come and sit. He cleared your entire body carefully and wash your hair to remove the blood that was stuck. ’‘We’ll be fine.” He said more to himself than to you. After cleaning you, he helped you to dry and brought you back to the room to get new clothes. He gave you an old his shirt and sweatpants. “ Kai it’s okay, it’s not your fault. ” You said to let him know that you do not blame him. You knew he was conflicted feelings and surely he was feeling guilty. He said nothing, only took you to the bed and lay down with you. “ Kai ” before you could continue he interrupted you. “ It’s okay baby, I’ll never let anyone hurt you again, now you need to rest. ” He said pulling you one closer and kissing her forehead, you could feel the tears wet her face. He was crying, you never seen Kai crying. “ Kai, I love you. ” You said and before you fall asleep, you heard him say. “ I love you baby. ”

Starter for moralcompassesbreak

Marina sat in the interrogation room of the Gracepoint PD, waiting for the detective assigned to her father’s case. She practiced breathing exercises to keep herself calm, pushing down her grief. There would be plenty of time after the investigation for that.
It had been an agonizing week between discovering Greg’s body and now. She only hoped she wasn’t a suspect.