Dear old love,
I want you to remember
I get afraid of your absence
I get afraid that once
this conversation is over
you will no longer find the need
to find me in all the chaos
when I call
To acknowledge me,
when I am near
I get afraid
you’ll disappear again
when I slowly start
to show you my heart
that if I tell you
everything I want to say
you’ll be halfway out the door
I want you to remember,
means to try again
even when it hurts
even when you’re terrified
of the outcome
even when you’re far away
because love waits
and love forgives.
I thought it would be fun to compile all the fics I wrote this year into one big post. This year is almost over, and you all have made it so much fun! I love being able to share my fics with all of you! Fics with porn in them will be labled as such!
Arin/Everyone: My ultimate bottom Arin fic. Arin has an arrangement where he gets fucked by every Grump except for Dan. Soon, he realizes that he wants Dan too, and that maybe Dan wants him back. Much angst and sex occurs. This was my FIRST GG fic and is my longest, and also still my favorite. (PORN OMG)
Dan/Arin/Suzy: Dan, Arin, and Suzy are in a poly-amorous relationship. Dan comes home from traveling to some naughty plans that Suzy and Arin have thought up. My last fic of 2015! (porn)
I posted my first GG fic back in June. I remember being so nervous about it, but you all have been so lovely and wonderful to me you really don’t know what it means to me to have people appreciate my work the way you do!
I tried to post something every month as a personal goal for myself and I managed to pull it off! I wrote 13 fics for the fandom this year not counting the smaller things. It’s been a lot of fun! Hopefully 2016 brings many more opportunities for fic!
Our story will always be an unfinished one. No matter how many times I tell myself we are long since buried in the past, there will be moments where a gush of wind and a certain fall of rain flashes everything back. There will be moments where I stop and look up at a stranger on a train hoping it’s you. There will be moments where I purposely pass by your favorite book store holding on to that very tiny shred of hope that I might run into you. Holding on to the questions I never got the answer for. Holding on to the thought that maybe, just maybe, we were meant to meet again
Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard: The Sexuality Crisis
Magnus had never been attracted to boys before, only girls. He could appreciate the aesthetic of them, but never before had he wanted to date one. He was as straight as a rod-always had been, and always will be.
So it wasn’t gay of him to think Alex was cute. She was cute on both her female days and male days. It wasn’t gay at all.
Or: Magnus has a crisis over whether liking Alex is gay or not and everyone else is facepalming at him.
Sure, he had that period of time where he had questioned his sexuality after learning that heterosexuality wasn’t the only one, but everyone went through that. And by the time it was over, he had decided that he was nothing other than straight. The thought of being anything else never crossed his mind again.
But just because Magnus was straight didn’t mean he couldn’t appreciate the aesthetic of other guys from time to time. He wasn’t blind, he could tell whether people were attractive or not. And sometimes, those guys were pretty nice to look at for a moment or two longer than necessary. But he never once felt the desire to do anything romantic with them, because he wasn’t attracted to guys. It was as simple as that.
I remember how it all started, and I just want to go back to the very first day you walked into my life. It’s not so easy trying to rekindle and spark an old flame, but I do miss the person you were and the person I was while trying to save what became of the two of us.
it has been my experience that exactly half of witches are ethereal and fey creatures who walk with clouds beneath their feet, lifting their steps up slightly higher. and half are silly ol’ lots of wonder and laughter who enjoy pranks and jokes.
buy a jar, adorn it with elements that the witch is keen to, write a secret on a piece of paper, and give it to them. also gives a treat, something wonderful and fun, or something precious.
The Blacklist AU | Liz and Ressler leave the FBI to work for Red in order to catch Berlin and Tom.
His jacket is long gone, lost in the floor of some russian mobster’s club. His sleeves are rolled up to his elbows, the first three buttons of his now bloody shirt are missing, gun hidden in the back of his trousers. He has a nasty cut on his left eyebrow, a swollen cheek and probably a broken lip, but he’s still alive.
When Ressler opens the door of the suite the first thing he sees is Dembe and Red playing chess.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me.”
“Oh, Donald,” says Red cheerfully without taking his eyes off the game. “What took you so long?”
“You left me with a bunch of Bratva guys, just after you took half of their money, because you said you need to take care of an important matter. What the hell is so important about chess!?”
“Take a breath, agent Ressler.” Donald clench his teeth. He’s not an agent, not anymore, Red has to stop calling him that. “We had a lead, but it’s far gone by now. We were waiting for you.”
“You have a lead?”
“I was speaking with Max,” says Liz coming from the next room with a tablet in hand. “They saw Berlin a few days ago in… What the hell happened to you?” she asks him as soon as she raises her eyes from the tablet and focus her glance on Ressler.
The Blacklist First Meeting AU: It’s a beautiful sunny day and you decide to spend your lunch break relaxing in the nearby park but your favorite bench is occupied by a mysterious sharp-dressed handsome stranger, who ends up engaging you in conversation with his larger-than-life stories.
I know you hold back because you’re afraid. I know you stop halfway because you’re tired. I know you reluctantly open your heart because you no longer have the energy to stitch it back together. And I understand. It’s frightening to wake up one day and realize your sun no longer shines.
Their shows are world-class. They’re masters of their field. Their world is rich with color and they live, breathe, and b l e e d showmanship, decadence, extravagance.
is flawless on any tightrope. He can unicycle across it, walk on his
hands, dance across it, whatever. Kylo swears he knows the secret to it.
‘Of course he can. There’s an invisible rod stuck so far up his ass
that he couldn’t possibly fuck up his precision, even if he wanted to.‘
can tame any animal. It doesn’t even matter, Kylo will stare into the
eyes of the fiercest creature and be best friends with it in 2 minutes
flat. Hux likes to say that it’s because ‘wild recognizes wild’. ’You’re one of them,’ Hux tells Ren constantly, with barely concealed derision. ’Of course they’re nice to you.’
All derision aside, they do make a spectacular union when they come together for an aerial display,
whether its flying via trapeze, or seduction suspended from the peak of the Big Top in jewel-toned
ribbons, but they compete for popularity and the spotlight more
viciously than anyone knows. Hux swears he will be the next Ringleader to replace Snoke and Kylo isn’t about to let him just take that
title. Kylo remains a threat; he eats and breathes fire, and thoroughly captivates his audience with an
allure of dark, dangerous charm. He owns two panthers that he loves as if they
were his own children–Kyber and Krystal are breathtaking to watch with
Kylo directing them. Even Hux stands transfixed to watch Kylo’s grandeur sometimes,
though he’s seen hundreds of Kylo’s acts, night after night.
the lights go out and the crowds disperse, and the scent of sparks and
sweet confections hang heavy in the air, they tend to fall prey to the
temptations of their own private dance, ready to exhaust the adrenaline
of the stage on one another. Powered by the highs of electric atmosphere
and deafening applause, together they’re a masterpiece not meant for the
public eye. Kylo is certain Hux could make a fortune as a solo
contortionist, if the performance beneath the sheets is anything to go
by, and he loves the fire of Hux’s hair gripped in his fists or twining round his fingers far more
fervently than any flame he commands on a stage. All the while, Hux grows addicted to how it feels to tame every square inch of the wildest force he knows. The industry is their playground, but ironically their best grandstanding is done in the dark. ~
I engulfed the idea of what could be us
what could be the mornings spent
tugging each other back to sleep
wrapped in blankets
that no longer smells like her.
I count the spaces
in between your ribs
and measure your heart
against my own.
I hear the voices stuck on walls
from the previous nights
you shared with somebody else
long before you knew me,
and you trace the corners
of my fingertips,
caressing my face
as if you could tell my heart
was slowly wavering.
You point out a scar
I always have trouble
telling the story of
and before I could say anything
you smiled and said that
it was beautiful.
I’ve been struggling to find
the right words
to explain us,
how do I even begin
to come up
with the right definition of “us”?
And then I realize
that there are none.
We don’t have to have
the proper notions or
be perfect metaphors.
You and I don’t have to be
We don’t have to be
each other’s run on sentences.
We aren’t words,
but people who have
the slightest clue
what love is.
And that’s okay.