karkat strider

Homestuck doesn’t queerbait, it straightbaits.

Remember when the comic seemed as if Dave would end up with Jade and Karkat would end up with Terezi? Yeah well DaveKat is canon instead

Way back when it seemed like John and Rose were set up to be together but she has super hot alien vamp wife.

Roxy and John are getting along well! Oh no she’s gay and possibly dating his grandma too

Terezi obviously has to choose between Karkat and D– nevermind she chose Vriska

The hets have been bamboozled again

davekat au: dave has a youtube channel where he reviews things. just… things. his most popular video is 17 minutes of him eating an apple in slow-mo, occasionally pausing to describe the precise details of the apple experience. he’s so deadpan that no one can tell if it’s a joke or not. karkat binge-watches his videos in an exhausted, insomniac haze at 3 in the morning, and then sends him an exhaustive 10-page mostly incoherent rant about how his channel is confusing and pointless in all caps. karkat promptly passes out and, the next morning, assumes it was all a strange and elaborate dream, until dave’s next video is a totally deadpan “review” of karkat’s “concerns.” the video gets over 100,000 views and its own meme. it launches dave into internet fame. karkat has never been more infuriated in his life. he rage-messages terezi, who owns a popular shitpost blog, who says OH Y34H 1M MUTU4LS W1TH H1M and then copypastes dave’s url. fast-forward 5 months and they’re dating