my swedish teacher is awesome. half of the things he says in class are funny. here are a few he’s managed to say in 2 classes so far:
- swedes aren’t romantic. the most romantic thing is when they go together to ikea. that’s how you know the relationship is serious. when they go to ikea together.
- (about the word djur) don’t say the d, that’s just for aesthetic.
- you can use jaha for everything. are you sad? jaha. are you happy? jaha. excited? jaha. surprised? jaha. weirded out? jaha.
- now come the most important words in swedish. *turns to the board and writes the words: kaffe. en kopp kaffe. en påtår. en kaffe paus. en fika. fika paus) In sweden, every pause is a coffee pause. or a fika pause. we live for them. I have a coffee pause in 50 minutes. it’s great.
- in swedish, we have approximately 200 ways of writing [sh]. I don’t know why.
- ett kafé. there’s no é in the swedish alphabet. but here it is.
- the letter z. we don’t really use it, only in words like zebra and zombie. so when zombie movies got popular, the use of swedish z went up 100%.
- in sweden, everybody uses the informal you. so the swedish prime minister comes in? I’ll say “Hej Stefan”
- the swedish king is very stupid but also very popular. and I can see why. you come home from work, all depressed, you think you’re so stupid and useless and then you turn on the tv. and you see the king. and you’re happy again. because there’s someone stupider than you. and it’s the king.