k k r

My favorite Korean R&B singer replied to my DM. I deleted the message (Like a dumb dumb because I just knew she wasn’t going to see it!) so I forgot what all I said. I just remember complementing her on her music and saying how I loved her. If you don’t know who Boni is. These 2 are my favorite songs of hers:

Boni- One in a million

보니(Boni) - PUSH  

To Everyone;

Do me a favor: go to Google and look up what the Milky Way galaxy looks like. Try to find our solar system. Can’t, can you? We’re just a spec. Now, do me one more favor: type “galaxies” in the google search instead, then click “images.” You should be looking at satellite telescope images of thousands of galaxies. Pretty neat, right?

When you sit and think about that, and you think of how vast space truly is and how we’re microscopic in comparison… it’s mind boggling how minuscule so many of our stresses really are. That person doesn’t like you? The stranger on the bus was an ass? You get a bad grade on something? Your boss is a dick? Your parents no longer your parents? Guess what?

An ant colony functions generally on one system per ant society. They’re born, they work, they die. They build a colony, they maintain the colony, the serve the Queen, mate, die. That’s it. That’s all.

Now, imagine if this planet was one colony out of millions. What does the problems of one ant actually matter to the greater flow of nature? I know, that sounds harsher than I intended and I didn’t mean it like that. What I’m saying is… Time is possibly the most destructive thing of all (or possibly the greatest blessing of all; perspective, really), and with the passing of time, all these problems will melt away and mean nothing. Your broken heart will mend. Your grade will improve (or not, but should that dictate the rest of your life?), money will come, you’ll meet people that will care. All the while, stars will still burn, the earth will still rotate, asteroids will still move, the universe will still expand… time will still pass. 60-80 years is only nano seconds in comparison to the universe itself.

Since life is so short, why waste it on negativity? Look to the stars and see with wondering eyes the beauty that exists beyond the stratosphere. Beyond the solar system. Beyond the Milky Way. What wonders exist that we know nothing of? Look up rather than down. Hold your head high.

An ant concerns itself not of the opinions of other ants. It cares not about the resource another ant found or why it brings it to the colony. It concerns itself only with what it thinks is useful and offers the fruits of its labor to the big picture. Just because it grabbed part of a leaf doesn’t mean it is going to fight another ant over its choice to grab a grain or a twig or even a piece of trash. Concern yourself not about the opinions of others or the lives of others. Do you and just live.

It’s a hard lesson for me. I’m down almost every day. I’m distraught all the damn time and I search this blog endlessly for a letter for me. No one is thinking of me right now. That’s fine though. I’m a single mama just trying to make the best of the life I’m given before I’m food for the worms. There are so many wonderful things out there to see, do, and experience.

Hold your head up and open your eyes. You can’t see the sunshine with your eyes shut. Stop worrying about the petty shit. It’ll pass. Your love will come for you (even if it isn’t who you expected; usually, it is someone better than you hoped for which means right now just isn’t your time). Your boss will eventually fuck off, your account will get better, your fridge will get full, your relationships will blossom, you’ll get that career.

Be positive. Things will happen in their own time. Until then, see the sun. Hear the laughs. Taste the wine. Smell the roses. Feel the beauty. Don’t ever forget to take in each and every beautiful moment before it’s gone for good. All in good time, my loves. All in good time.

Live. Love. Learn. 💋

A Patiently Waiting Single Mama
aka G.


빅브레인 Big Brain -  NO-YEs Official M/V  

Big Brain is this R&B group (They’re amazing btw). In this video there’s a Black lead  in it.

on day 7 of Seven’s route

me: “I’m so happy that you’re here. We can be like newly-weds!”

Seven: “I’m sorry, but I’m not interested in that.”