This Is The Face of My Mental Illness

I took this picture of myself at the end of a day I spent in bed, scared and crying, feeling alone and hopeless and completely desperate.

This is the face of my mental illness. This is the face of my sadness when it is at its most inexplicable and its most pronounced.

I am not ashamed of it.

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Culled down to 8 minutes, here’s Robin Williams performing with the UCB Harold Team Bangs on November 18th, 2008. Its mostly clips, but I left the group games in at full because I think they’re his best work in the show.

I always just assumed that some day I’d run into him, and be able to thank him for “killing time in Chelsea” and performing with us. Thanks to Justin Purnell for filming this, and thanks to Chuck Dauble for pulling me aside and saying “Robin Williams just showed up to do improv, he should play with you guys”.