So I’m just chatting with my friend on Facebook and he randomly says the following:

“sitting on a warm toilet when someone used it right before you”

“using your boyfriend’s semen instead of cream cheese on your bagel”

“popping your zits and using the pus as cream for cupcakes <3”

“using your aunt’s prosthetic leg to masturbate.”

“playing Katy Perry songs entirely with your farts at a party(:”

Then he told me he got it from Tumblr and they weren’t as funny anymore.