just-saying-this

I just want to say something because even though i personally haven’t seen it on my dash, I’ve seen post that mention that some people agree with Sonja? Or hate Even?? And that just makes no sense to me so, have this story. 

I don’t have any sort of mental illness but I grew up around someone who does. My aunt. She has schizophrenia. 

Growing up I saw her have a couple of episodes. I heard my mom discuss her medications, her behavior, her doctors appointments. Running off to take care of her during the episodes I didn’t witness. Felt and witnessed the anxiety and fear for my aunts safety and well being. Through all this the one thing I never grew up with? The idea that she was wrong. That she was bad. That she was “crazy”. I never really saw her differently from any other member of my extend family. 

 Her kids though, they had a problem. 

You see, my aunt’s ex husband was not a good guy. He treated her disorder as something to blame on her. As if she somehow brought it on herself. My cousins grew up with the same mentality. There is a lot of other stuff here but I won’t talk about that. The story i want to talk about is this one.

A couple of years after her divorce my aunt met someone. My cousins weren’t thrilled about this. They accused him of taking advantage of my aunt. Then after 2 years of dating and one big episode, my cousins decided to commit her. My aunts boyfriend was having none of that. He fought for her. And he won.  

I remember my mother asking him if he was sure, if he wanted to take on the responsibility of taking care of her. Do you know what he said? He said she’s always been his responsibility because he loves her. 

They’ve been together nearly 20 years. My aunt hasn’t stopped having episodes. She hasn’t stopped taking medication. It’s been ups and downs. But I never ONCE doubted his love for her. HE NEVER ONCE DOUBTED HER LOVE FOR HIM. They have and continue to live a full happy life together.

Having a mental illness does NOT invalidate someones personhood. It does NOT invalidate their emotions. It does NOT invalidate their trauma. It absolutely does NOT make them unlovable or incapable of love. 

In conclusion: Even deserves everything good and pure in the world and Sonja needs to grow up and get that Even doesn’t need a babysitter, he needs a partner. And she clearly isn’t it. 

Can we talk about how both Isak’s father and Sonja just assume stuff? Mr Valtersen seemed pretty certain that Isak’s mother would be very upset about their son having a boyfriend and that she wouldn’t be able to accept it. Sonja most probably told Even (and now Isak) that his feelings for Isak weren’t real and she seems to believe it.

Since Isak’s dad has just been proven wrong, I honestly can’t wait for Sonja’s turn.

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BTS x MAMA 2016 | “I hope that our stage, our performance, and our music can be hopes and dreams for many people in the world.”