just trying something different okay

All right, listen. All of you, all of you sending me messages calling me a filthy capitalist and telling me I can’t tell you not to be angry, I am not telling you not to be angry, I am telling you to ensure your rage is Productive.

There is a difference between rage with purpose and rage that you let paralyze you into apathy. The first is the stuff that change and hope is built on, the second is what people want you to fall into so they can get away with shit without ever being challenged, because why challenge what you can’t fight, right?

Do not ever think you cannot fight something, do you hear me? There is always a chance to make something better, whether it’s something big or something small, there will always be options and there will always be people out there willing to fight, not just for themselves but for you too. Because this shit matters, okay? The big and the small. It matters. 

But you can’t just rely on others to change the world into a better place for you, you have to be a part of the process too. You don’t get to sit back on your laurels and lament the state of the world with snide cynicism if you are not actively part of the solution. And I know it’s sometimes hard to know where to start, but here’s a helpful suggestion: you can start with not being a snide little gremlin on the internet telling other people that their hope is pointless.

And to the person who told me “not all our lives are sunshine and hallmark moments”, like somehow that justifies their apathy, yea, you’re right. Not all our lives are sunshine and hallmark moments.

I’m a chronically ill disabled immigrant woman who has spent the last two years of her life facing one financial difficulty after another. I’ve had to beg for help to get necessary medical procedures, for house repairs, for food. I am well aware life is not a hallmark moment, thank you. 

Positivity does not come naturally to me. I am actually a very broken, depressed, very angry person at my core. It would be so very easy to turn my face away and ignore injustices of the world, both great and small. But that’s a choice I have decided I cannot live with. And YES, kindness is a CHOICE. 

Love is a choice, empathy is a choice, hope, is a choice. And it took me the longest time to realize you can use outrage and anger to fuel all of them for the better good. 

There is not a single atom of my being that is sunshine and rainbows. What I am however, is 100% exponential rage and exhaustion willing to throw down whenever or wherever my voice and actions will help. A hopeless populace is a docile populace. So even if it burns, my god even if you think you might die under the weight of caring, you take that rage, you take all that anger and pain and fear and you turn into hope and you launch it at those who would keep others down and you burn with it. You burn until you take them with you.

So the night is dark and full of terror? Be a light. However you can. In big ways or small. A thousand tiny gestures of kindness sustained over time will eventually make up a whole. Start somewhere.

But don’t you ever tell people it’s pointless to hope, or to believe in a better world. Don’t you dare take that from them. Do better. For your sake as well as others. You deserve better too. 

Hope is not the reserve of the naive, it is the foundation upon which better things are built. So stop trying to tear it down.

long mornings and longer thoughts

4

The soul, fortunately, has an interpreter - often an unconscious but still a faithful interpreter - in the eye.

Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë

2

do you feel that too?

3

HAPPY 22nd BIRTHDAY JEON WONWOO
#BeautifulWONWOOday #전원우_복덩어리_생일축하해 입니다.

Every Me And Every You - Two

Spencer reid x reader

You’d spent the whole of last night thinking about your conversation with Spencer. You couldn’t quite get your head around the fact that he’d told you that he liked dominating people.

Nor could you believe that you’d blurted out, “I trust you,” and asked if he’d show you.

It wasn’t that you were a shy person. Most of the time you were outgoing and loud and said what was on your mind. It was just….. well, this wasn’t a topic you’d ever really seriously talked about with anyone. Sure you’d made jokes about it with friends and stuff, but to have a full blown conversation with your friend and work colleague….one you found attractive too, well that was a completely different thing.

You’d been out for a run this morning and had spent the afternoon running errands and generally being a boring adult. Now you were relaxing in a bubble bath, thinking and contemplating the things he’d told you last night.

True to his word he’d sent you some links, you clicking and scanning through them before you passed out last night. Some of the heavier stuff scared you a little. You definitely didn’t think you would find people in full latex body suits and face hoods attractive or something you’d want to experience. But the thought of acting out certain scenarios that he’d mentioned, or being tied up and blindfolded, that did excite you somewhat.

But how much?

Lying in the tub you surveyed your body through the bubbles. Spencer had said there was a thin line between pain and pleasure. Hmmmm.

You couldn’t really spank yourself to see if you liked that. You’d never really be able to test your own limits. But you’d always enjoyed sex when it was a bit rough. Someone biting or scratching you, pulling or pinching your nipples hard. Did that mean you wanted to be whipped and spanked though?

You thought back to the links he’d sent you, and remembered that he’d said that if you wanted to explore this, you needed to be sure and you needed to find someone you trusted.

You trusted him.

Would he really be up for this?

Were you really up for this?

Only one way to find out. You grabbed your phone from where it was resting on the side of the bath and dialled. 

An hour later you were sat inside of Spencer Reid’s apartment, sitting across from him nervously.

“Are you certain this is something you want to try?” Your colleague asked you, watching for your reaction. You nodded, knowing that if you spoke, your voice would shake.

“And you know that you cannot let this effect our working relationship right? Normally if I’m doing this, it’s with someone from outside of my normal circle of friends. If this effects work, one of us will have to leave the BAU and it won’t be me offering to leave.”

You nodded again, knowing he was right.

You’d slept with coworkers before and had managed to keep the relationship in the office strictly professional. This wasn’t just sex though. But you could do it. You were sure.

“Did you read the information I sent you last night?”

“Yes.” You could definitely hear the nerves shaking your voice. You’d been much more confident over the phone. Now you were you actually here though….

“Are there certain aspects in particular you want to try? And things you don’t want to try? Talking about this is paramount to it working Y/N.” He took a sip of his coffee and you mirrored him. You’d asked if he had anything stronger but he refused, saying that you needed to be completely sober and aware of what was happening if you were being serious.

“Is this where we draw up some kind of contract or something?”

Spencer laughed, his eyes crinkling. “No. Whilst some people do actually do that, I prefer not to. I prefer to think that my partner will trust me enough without having a document to back it up. But you do need to tell me what you’re looking for here. And be completely honest.”

You took a deep breath, “Spencer, I honestly don’t know. The blindfold and restraint thing you told me about, I know I’d want to try that. The role play….. I think I’d like to try. But the whole ‘spank me and tell me I’m dirty’, that’s what I’m not sure about. I like sex a bit rough, but I’ve never been smacked or whipped or anything. But I think I like the idea of relinquishing all control. I just don’t know why.”

He smiled at you again. “Y/N, there’s ways for me to Dominate you without verbally insulting or physically hurting you, although I think you’ll be surprised. When the mood is right the endorphins in your body will take over and you may not feel as much pain as you’re expecting to. Everyone’s different. But there’s other ways.”

“How?” you breathed out, the nerves completely wiping the things you’d read last night from your mind.

“I could have you strip naked and spend the whole day waiting on me hand and foot, not allowing you to speak or get dressed. I could take you out for dinner and have you wear a remote controlled clitoral stimulator, which I’d have the control to. Or I could have you naked on my bed, spread eagled and instruct you to touch yourself whilst I watch, having you stop when I say stop and following my instructions only.”

Fuck…. All three of those options sounded ridiculously hot to you right now. You adjusted yourself on his couch, realising you felt wet between your thighs.

“You’ve flushed. And you’re wriggling.” He’d noticed, oh course he had.

“Sorry.”

“Why are you apologising? It’s good that this is turning you on. If it didn’t, I’d be worried about why you were here.”

“I just…. I wonder if I’m too ‘Vanilla’ for you. Whether my tastes won’t be the same as yours.” You’d come across that term last night.

“Yet I bet up until yesterday, you thought I was as ‘Vanilla’ as they came right?“ He air quoted with his hands, an amused look on his face.

You couldn’t not smile because it was true.

“Everyone starts somewhere Y/N. We can start slowly, maybe some restraints and sensory deprivation, see where your limits lie. And go from there?”

“Okay. Can I ask something first? Why are you wiling to do this with me Reid?”

He shrugged. “You asked. Everyone needs someone to show them the way if they’re new to the scene. It helps that I find you attractive, and if I’m being completely honest, seeing you handling some of the gear that had been collected as evidence this week, did give me ideas. So…. Do you want to try?”

Now or never Y/N.

“Yes…. Tonight?”

“If you like. I’ve not long showered and given the splashing I heard when you called, I presumed you’ve bathed.”

You nodded at him again.

“Okay. First things. I’m clean. I haven’t had a partner since my last STD test seven weeks ago. If you’d prefer to use protection though that’s 100 percent fine with me. I have a selection.”

Wow. You wondered what else he had a selection of, although you imagined you’d be finding out fairly soon.

“Erm, I’m clean too. I had a pap smear and tests done fourteen weeks ago and I haven’t been with any once since. I’m on the depo injection too. Condoms sometimes irritate me.”

“Good. My preference is without, but safe sex is important. Next point, safe words. And does your 'no’ actually mean 'no’. Because I need to be sure. Which is why the safe word is important.”

You’d read about safe words before. Some of the thrill came from hearing someone seemingly in pain and asking you to stop, but carrying on. Or saying no, but having someone continue. NOT in a rape scenario, that was something you’d never do, although you couldn’t quite bring yourself to ask Spencer whether that was a scenario he’d played out.

“Safe word……can it just be a colour?” Your mind was drawing a blank.

“It can indeed. Some partners operate with a few colours actually. Yellow meaning stop doing that particular thing but don’t end the scene, and red meaning to stop completely, scene over.”

“Can we do that?” you asked, now starting to feel slightly less nervous. He was making it easy to talk to him about this and you were thankful for that.

“We can if that’s what you want. If you say yellow, I’ll ease off initially and if you say it again, I’ll try something different. Say red, and we just stop completely okay, end of play, no judgement. Does this mean that 'no’ or 'stop’ means I can continue.”

“Yes. Although I’m not sure I’ll actually say no or stop. But who knows. What about…. What about if I’m gagged?”

“We won’t go that far tonight, but if that’s the case, we’ll make sure you can snap your fingers. I’ve seen you do it enough times at work before so I know you’re capable of it.”

Won’t go that far tonight. Oh jeez.

“Are you ready? Is there anything else you want to ask? Don’t be scared Y/N. And don’t be frightened to ask me what I’m doing or to use the safe words okay.”

“Okay. And… Yes. I’m ready.” Your heart was pounding and you felt slightly light headed, but you were ready.

“Alright then. Let’s move into my bedroom. Don’t worry, it’s not like the red room or anything. It’s just a normal room. I keep my toys locked away in a chest, just in case.”

Toys. Oh christ.

But you wanted this. As nervous as you were, you definitely wanted this. The feeling between your legs was a clear indicator of that.

Spencer stood and held out his hand to you.

Taking yet another deep breath, you took it.

So I finally got a chance to sit down and make some decent art for the first time in months, and holy shit am I proud of myself, I don’t think I’ve ever been capable of drawing and shading decent folds in clothing prior to this

I’m still not over MP100 and I don’t think I ever will be so here’s more fucking fanart ghh

abitofahipster  asked:

DUDE I LOVE YOUR STUFF SO MUCH OMG do u think u could maybe do an Asylum au with Joshua pls I love you bye

AU #14 (Request from this list)
Ft.Joshua/Jisoo

GLAD YOU LIKE MY BLOG!  I will gladly do this! Also I just. This AU. (Also excuse my sarcasm in this I’m using it as comedy but there’s a lot in here) I hope this is good enough!

  • Instead of the Harley Quinn thing where she works at an asylum…

  • *cough* You are in the asylum

  • (I just wanted to try something different okay)

  • (Also I don’t think Jisoo would be in an asylum; it doesn’t fit his personality in my opinion)

  • (Besides Meme~shua but I should really start the story now)

  • People who work at the asylum are showing the police security tapes, which are interviews with you, recorded starting a month ago

  • The first few are about you going to the asylum in the first place:

  • Cue the drumroll

  • You’re a psychopath

  • Like you burned down a building once bc a girl inside said she was “cold”

  • You didn’t go to jail for murder though bc there’s no proof you wanted her to die

  • Like you even showed regret to killing the girl

  • You were faking it but anyway

  • Your weirdest crime was basically improv bc some guy tried to rob the bank you were in, and you helped and afterwards set everything on fire again

  • I’m getting Wizard!Jun flashbacks but anYWAY

  • What got you into the asylum is you used blood to write on the city walls

  • But it wasn’t even your own blood it was just “someone else’s I found”

  • Like wtf what even

  • They still don’t know what happened

  • So they’re interviewing you about what I just mentioned, and the person running the tapes fast forwards it until you mention a single name

  • Joshua

  • “What is your relationship with Joshua?”

  • “Oh, he’s just a friend.”

  • Let’s go back in time to around the time the security tapes were recorded

  • You’re in your cell at this asylum

  • And Joshua walks into the connected room only separated by prison bars

  • “Joshua!!!”

  • “Hello Y/N…”

  • “Did you bring my gift?”

  • “The book?”

  • “Yes! Give it here!”

  • And you tell the guards sweetly that you’d like Joshua to come in your cell and they agree reluctantly

  • Tbh they just don’t want to hear your screaming

  • So Joshua enters the cell and the door locks behind him

  • Ironically the book he gives you is a bible *cough* Jisoos

  • You say with the calmest voice, “You know my favourite part? Where God sends 12 plagues to Egypt. Ah, it’s just fun to read the suffering of others.”

  • Joshua’s like Jisoos Jesus Christ she is insane

  • But he was hired to try and make you less psychopathic so the asylum won’t have to deal with you constantly screaming and trying to escape

  • But slowly you start manipulate him

  • And the worst part is

  • He’s aware he’s being manipulated and he lets it happen

  • You think at first it’s his way of finding out about you, but he shows he’s actually interested in your ideas

  • You actually become better at hiding you’re a psychopath (If you didn’t know, you can’t just stop being a psychopath; it’s a mental illness)

  • And you spend the next month sitting with Joshua and reading the bible and talking for therapy

  • You manage to almost set him on fire and the guards were like “what the heck how is that even literally possible this is a fireproof cell”

  • It was an accident tho bc you wouldn’t actually want to hurt Joshua

  • And Joshua is freaking out internally

  • Bc he actually cares about you

  • He realizes you aren’t a completely bad person, it’s just your mental condition that causes you to be violent, but your personality is nice and caring

  • (TBH THAT SHOULD BE A FAMOUS QUOTE CMON)

  • So he does something very stupid

  • He tells you his real name is Jisoo and he uses Joshua as an alias

  • And then he does something even stupider

  • He kisses you

  • AND THEN DOES THE STUPIDEST THING EVER

  • hE deCidES tO HeLp yoU eScAPe

  • Bc freaking young love

  • Except, yknow, you’re a psychopath

  • Save this poor confused guy

  • I’m starting to think he’s a psychopath too but that’s not true (OR IS IT?!?! No I’m kidding)

  • One day, Jisoo comes to the asylum and is about to visit you, when there’s a security breach!

  • If you didn’t expect this you really should watch more TV

  • And everyone is freaking out bc shoot why did someone break in?!?!?

  • In all seriousness why does anyone want to break into an asylum in any tv show or book or whatever like seriously you might literally die my god

  • And then Jisoo calmly ducks away from everyone

  • Your cell door unlocks

  • And you walk out calmly and take Jisoo’s hand and escape through a backdoor

  • CUE THE POLICE NOT FINDING YOU BECAUSE DUES EX MACHINA

  • So Jisoo takes you to live with him

  • You do a pretty good job of hiding your psychopathic tendencies

  • Except maybe that time you almost killed the neighbor’s cat that kept bugging you until Jisoo befriended it

“Y/N, I love you, you know that, but please don’t try cooking I swear if you burn this place down…”

SEND HELP THIS GIF IS THE ONLY ONE THAT FITS AND I CAN’T

anonymous asked:

OMG CAN U DO AN ASHTON ONE WHERE HE BLINDFOLDS U AND HANDCUFFS U AND HE CALLS U KITTEN AND BABYGIRL

ngl I’m actually pretty proud of this one so here ya go! :) PS THIS HAS SMUT (INCLUDING PET NAMES LIKE BABY GIRL AND KITTEN, HANDCUFFS, AND BLINDFOLDS) SO DON’T READ THIS IF YOU’RE YOUNGER THAN MY 14-YEAR-OLD BROTHER. (ps it has baby girl but NOT daddy so if you don’t like daddy kink, this is okay)

Keep reading

2

Siblings, fallen from Heaven, and God’s greatest adversaries.  

10

Olicity au mini trailer ll Oliver and Felicity were together a long time in college but everything changed one day and he had no idea what’s happening. 

Coffee Is Not A Metaphor For Dean’s Sexuality (except it really kind of is) 

(ao3)

So maybe it was dumb. Okay, no, it was definitely dumb, but Dean had been coming to that coffee shop for a good two weeks now and he had decided that it served what was without a doubt the best coffee he’d had. Ever.

The aforementioned “dumb” part of this trip was. Well.

Dean wanted to try something new. Specifically, the white chocolate raspberry mocha that was specialty there, at that cozy little coffee shop on the corner. He’d passed by dozens of times and inhaled the incredible scent of the sweet raspberries and white chocolate and rich coffee and he just really wanted to try it.

But Dean didn’t drink that girlie shit. He drank coffee black, adding two sugars when no one was watching and that was it. So no way was he gonna try that fruity delicacy, no matter how deliciously fragrant it was.

Keep reading

Please

(Please read with the title for each break)
Listen to something uplifting to you.
Eat something sweet.
Do something you enjoy, like art.
Remove yourself from what upsets you, get up and walk away or tune out that noise.
Ignore those hateful anons and/or known hateful people.
Don’t hurt yourself, try scribbling on yourself or draw something and tear it up.
Drink water as well as juice.
Scream and cry when you need to.
Take deep breaths.
Play a game.
Read something good.
Take time for yourself to recover.
Please remember you do have friends who care. You can talk to them, good friends will listen and try to help.
Please talk, take a step back, and try something different. You’ll be okay, just breathe. You can make it.