just thinking about it is making me want to cry

Mom I never told you how much it scared me when it rained.
You would put a bucket under all of the leaks and act like it wasn’t a big deal.
But to me it was terrifying.
Mom I never told you how one day the rain never stopped.
It was when grandma died.
I finally understood the phrase “when it rains it pours”
And mom I never told you that it poured for the next 4 years.
I’m not proud of the things I did, to stifle the pain.
I’m not proud of the amount of times I thought about just ending it all together.
Mom I never told you how I used to look in the mirror and cry.
I didn’t want you to think it was your fault,
You did your best to make me feel beautiful
But I struggle with it to this day.
Mom I never told you how I let boys treat me.
How I thought so little of myself,
And how I let them do and say whatever they wanted to me.
Mom I never told you how much it hurt to live,
How I forced myself to breathe because that was the only thing that meant I was still alive.
That meant I could still see you laugh, and smile.
Mom I never told you how much you meant to me.
How you were the bucket in my storm.
How you unknowingly held me up so I could piece myself back together.
How you didn’t just give me life but you helped me hold on to it.
Mom I never told you,
I never told you how you saved me.
—  Mom, I never told you… / SM

diminished-chord-owo  asked:

Can i have some good vibes? I feel terrible rn and just want to die, I've been thinking too much about stuff that makes me feel uncomfortable and how i would like to see the human race to just stop existing 🙃🙃🙃 I'm also running low on sleep and i have an dentist appointment in about 6 hours. I actually want to cry but i have to wait until my mother leaves for work cus i don't want her to see. Hope you have a nice day anyway. Sry for long ask.

lots of good vibes aaaa i hope u feel better soon!!

anonymous asked:

Hi Alice, odd question but: Do you believe asexuals belong in the LGBT community? I have a friend who identifies this way, but as a trans girl, I'm struggling to understand how she has to go through the same things as an LGBT person by being asexual. And struggle aside, I don't even see how asexuality is THAT different from heterosexuality, just with more... hesitation!? Maybe this sounds rude, but I know you've written about asexual people etc, and I wondered what you thought. No shade intended

Hi there. I’m glad you reached out to me about this because you must have really upset your friend by saying stuff like this to them.

It’s easy to see why not only cishet people, but also LGBT+ people, think that asexuality is fake. The world is awash with sex and sexual attraction. It’s everywhere. And everyone is supposed to want it and feel it. It’s so extremely normalised that the idea that someone could be literally UNABLE to feel sexual attraction is, to many people, absolutely bizarre and a joke.

Even if you acknowledge that asexuality is real, it’s also easy to see why you would be so quick to reject and get angry at asexual people who call themselves LGBT+. Because asexual people are not like you, are they. Unless they are trans, asexuals don’t have gender troubles, and unless they experience same-gender romantic attraction, asexuals don’t experience same-gender attraction! Lesbian, bi, gay etc people can all be joined together in their experience of same gender attraction, and all trans folks, binary and non binary, can be joined together in their experience of feeing a disconnect from their assigned birth gender.

The result? No one wants asexuals near them. People can’t relate. No one else feels the way asexuals do and people don’t think they should be part of the group. They’re not the same as you.

But oh god, they are not allowed in the cishet club either.

The first thing you need to try and unlearn is that asexuality is in any way similar to heterosexuality. It’s not. It’s so, so fucking not. It’s painful how different it feels to be asexual compared to being heterosexual. Telling an ace person that asexuality isn’t ‘THAT different from heterosexuality’ is about as accurate as saying being gay isn’t ‘THAT different from heterosexuality’. Being asexual means you do not experience sexual attraction, ever. EVER. And while that might seem easy to you, it’s an extremely painful and terrifying thing to learn about yourself, in a world where everyone is expected to have an array of sexual experiences, fall in love, get married, and anyone who doesn’t do that is strange and a freak.

Learning you are asexual can be terrifying. When you realise you’ve never had a crush, when all your friends have had ten each, you are terrified. When you pass the age where people have started dating and having sex and you still feel nothing - NOTHING - you are terrified. When you think about ever falling in love and the idea disgusts you, or you think about falling in love and you crave it, god you CRAVE it, but you know you can’t ever feel that, you are terrified. When you realise you will never be able to enjoy a normal romantic/sexual relationship, the ones full of passion like you see in the movies, and people will reject you because you can’t fancy them in that way, and there’s a higher chance for you than anyone else that you will simply die alone, without love, without children - you are terrified.

You think being ace is the same as heterosexuality? You think it’s an easy thing to learn about yourself? Explain the terror, then. I’m all ears.

The fact you see asexuality as 'hesitation’ is really horrifying to me. Asexuals aren’t attracted to the opposite gender but 'hesitant’ to act on it. Asexuals DO NOT feel attraction. To anyone. It’s not a choice. It’s not a way of life. It’s not the same as celibacy out of choice, or being a 'prude’, or waiting till marriage. It is ingrained in you, just like being gay is, just like being trans is. It is a part of you that no matter how hard you try to will it away, no matter how hard you try to persuade yourself otherwise, you cannot help it. You DO NOT feel attracted to ANYONE.

And in saying all this, I fully acknowledge that asexuals do not experience the extent of oppression that other LGBT+ folks do. There are no laws regarding asexuality. Lesbian, gay, bi, trans, and other LGBT+ folks no doubt experience a higher level and intensity of systematic oppression to asexuals, more frequently go through hard experiences due to their orientation or gender. But since when did being LGBT+ become a competition for 'who’s the most oppressed’? Is that what LGBT+ is? You’re only allowed in the club if you’re 'oppressed enough’? If you’re 'gay enough’? If you’re 'trans enough’?

If you need persuading that asexuals do experience their own form of oppression, though, consider the number of asexuals who are coerced into sex in order to 'fix’ them. Consider the emotional pain that I have already discussed, of feeling that there is something fundamentally wrong and gross about you because you feel attracted to no one. Consider the number of asexuals who are hounded or emotionally abused by their families for failing to find partners. Consider the number of asexuals who force themselves to have sexual experiences, because it is the norm, because they don’t even know what asexuality is, because THEY think that they are just 'hesitant’, despite finding sex disgusting and feeling no desire to do it. Do you really think asexuals are just running around, free and happy and content in who they are? They aren’t. I’m not.

So go ahead. Cast aside asexuals if you want. Call them attention-seeking, call them special snowflakes. Ignore the pain they feel. Make them go through it alone, in pain, terrified of what they are. Why on earth would the LGBT+ community be a place to support people like that!?

Messages like the one you have just sent me gives me further reason to never talk about that part of myself. To just sit and cry about it at home day after day because I do not like myself. Because I feel that nobody will accept me or understand who I am. I could list the number of things people have said to me to discredit and laugh at this part of myself, but it’s people like you who make me embarrassed to talk about it, too scared to own a label and talk about it freely and openly.

I thought, going into this, that the LGBT+ community was one of total respect, understanding, and empathy. I learnt pretty quickly that it is not.

I send love to your asexual friend. I really, really do.

Disclaimer: I am very aware of the nuances of asexuality, of the differences between romantic/aesthetic/sexual attraction, but sadly it seems that many people can’t even grasp the basic concept of asexuality, so I don’t quite think they’re ready for that yet.

WRITING PROMPTS

WRITING PROMPTS FOR DAYS
Feel free to request any of these for any character.

1. “Do you want me to leave?”
2. “I swear it won’t happen again.”
3. “I’m not jealous.”
4. “You can’t keep doing this.”
5. “I’m going to take care of you, okay?”
6. “You can’t die. Please don’t die.”
7. “You did what?!”
8. “Were you ever going to tell me?”
9. “Don’t ask me that.”
10. “I might have had a few shots.”
11. “What’s with the box?”
12. “Say it!”
13. “I could kiss you right now!”
14. “Are you done with that?”
15. “Are you still awake…?”
16. “Excuse you?”
17. “This is all your fault!”
18. “I shouldn’t be in love with you.”
19. “I could kill you right now!”
20. “Just admit I’m right.”
21. “That doesn’t even make sense.”
22. “That’s irrational.”
23. “Just pretend to be my date.”
24. “Are you really going to leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”
25. “When you love someone, you don’t just stop. Ever. Even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy… even then. Especially then!”
26. “I think I’ve been holding myself from falling in love with you all over again.”
27. “I’m not going to apologise for this. Not anymore.”
28. “That’s almost exactly the opposite of what I meant.”
29. “It must be hard with your sense of direction, never being able to find your way to a decent pickup line.”
30. “Can I sit here? The other tables are full.”
31. “You weren’t supposed to laugh!”
32. “This is, by far, the dumbest thing you’ve ever done.”
33. “I’m not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.”
34. “These stars are nothing compared to the ones I’ve seen in your eyes.”
35. “Before I do this, I need you to know that I have always loved you.”
36. “Did I say that out loud?”
37. “Do you think they could have loved me?”
38. “Everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy.”
39. “How long have you been standing there?”
40. “Have I ever lied to you?”
41. “Have you lost your fucking mind?”
42. “His ego is so visible; I can almost watch it grow.”
43. “I am not losing you again!”
44. “I don’t know why I’m crying.”
45. “I had a nightmare about you and I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”
46. “I just need to be alone right now.”
47. “When I picture myself happy… It’s with you.”
48. “I made a mistake.”
49. “I may be an idiot, but I’m your idiot.”
50. “I need you to forgive me.”
51. “I see the way you look at me when you think I’m not looking.”
52. “I think I’m in love with you and that scares me half to death.”
53. “I’m flirting with you.”
54. “I’m not good enough for you.”
55. “I fell in love with my best friend.”
56. “I’m sorry, what? I keep getting lost in your eyes.”
57. “I’m up to the challenge.”
58. “I’ve been in love with you my entire life. Ever since the day I first met you.”
59. “I’m yours.”
60. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to seduce me.”
61. “If you go anywhere near them, you’ll have to deal with me!”
62. “It’s okay to cry…”
63. “What do you mean? It’s exciting!”
64. “Talk to me.”
65. “Look at me—just breathe, okay?”
66. “Look, I don’t have much time, but I wanted to say I love you.”
67. “Oh my god! You’re in love with them!”
68. “Well, this is where I live.”
69. “We finish it the same way we started—together.”
70. “What are you afraid of?”
71. “You are the single best thing that has ever happened to me.”
72. “You deserve so much better.”
73. “You don’t have to stay.”
74. “You don’t know you the way I do.”
75. “You fainted, straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention, you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”
76. “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.”
77. “You shouldn’t have even been there!”
78. “You weren’t supposed to hear that.”
79. “You’re safe now. I’ve got you.”
80. “Teach me?”
81. “We’re in the middle of a thunderstorm and you want to stop and feel the rain?”
82. “Looks like we’ll be stuck here for a while.”
83. “Just once.”
84. “I can’t believe you talked me into this.”
85. “It’s not what it looks like.”
86. “I got you a present.”
87. “Hey! I was gonna eat that!”
88. “See, now, what that so bad?”.”
89. “You’re the best part of me.”
90. “I don’t want to think about what I’d be like without you.”
91. “Can I hold your hand?”
92. “Let’s move in together.”
93. “It’s a real shame nobody asked for your opinion.”
94. “What time is it?”
95. “Just wait a second.”
96. “Here, let me.”
97. “You’re so cute when you pout like that.”
98. “Hold me back!’
99. “I don’t care what they said, it doesn’t mean shit!”
100. “I adore you.”

more sentence starters !!

here’s another compilation of my fav sentence starters bc i love making these !!  feel free to add your own (◕‿◕✿)

FLUFF:

1. “Your hair is so soft..”
2. “It’s too cold! Come back!”
3. “No, I’m not letting you go. It’s too early to get out of bed.”
4. “C’mere, you can sit in my lap until I’m done working.”
5. “I’m not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.”
6. Shh, you’re safe. I won’t let you go.
7. What? does that feel good?
8. Just pretend to be my date.
9. He/She did it. No he/she did.
10. I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified.
11. It’s not a double dat. We’re just third and fourth wheeling.
12. No no–it’s alright, come here.
13. I’m not going to leave you. You’re never going to have to suffer by yourself again, I promise.
14. Look, I know we don’t know each other that well, but I’m still worried about you. No one deserves to be alone.
15. If I could, I would kiss away all of your scars.
16. I think I might be falling in love with you.
17. Your lips are so soft. I could kiss them all day.
18. It’s not bad to cry. In fact, I think it makes a person stronger.
19. Mmm.. you’re warm.
20. You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this..
21. I’ve had a rough day and honestly all I want right now is a drink and someone to cuddle with..
22. No, you can’t get up! You’re my prisoner for today.
23. Shh, it was just a bad dream. Just a dream, okay? None of it was really.
24. You know I’m/we’re always here for you, right?
25. Please talk to me about it.
26. You have something in you hair.. um–do you want me to get it out?
27.  I remember practicing how to ask you out in the mirror..
28. I would’ve had breakfast ready, but you were sleeping on my arm and I didn’t want to wake you.
29. I know I’ve kissed you like, ten times, but just like another ten, please.
30. I can’t believe I got the first date, let alone a year.
31. Wanna, like–I mean, if you’re not busy.. We could get lunch? Or even just coffee if you don’t have a lot of time?
32. So I was driving past a pet store and couldn’t help but wonder how cute an animal would be like in our home..
33. Let’s just stay in bed.
34. We live together. You can’t blame this on anyone else.
35. I think I might be pregnant..
36. I want to try for a baby.
37. You would make the perfect father/mother.
38. Think about it. The little patter of children in our home.
39. I want to marry you.
40. I want to take a shower so you should probably join me. It’ll save water.

ANGST:

41. You’re just not the same anymore..
42. It’s midnight! Where the hell were you?
43. What the hell is your problem?!
44. Why do you run away from your problems all the time?
45. You can’t keep it all inside, you know? Bottling it up won’t do any good.
46. Hey, I know you’re hurting.. but, you’re not alone, okay?
47. I hate you! I’m sorry it took me so damn long to realize that.
48. You lost your chance.
49. I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression.
50. You can’t just lose your temper like this every time you get a bit upset!
51. Calm down! You’re scaring me!
52. Don’t look at me like that.
53. Were you ever going to tell me?
54. I’m done trying to help you!
55. Sorry doesn’t fix everything.
56. You didn’t call. You didn’t text. Nothing.
57. It isn’t up for debate.
58. I don’t know what’s wrong, okay? I’m just… really tired.
59. I’m fine. Stop asking.
60. I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s wrong, and don’t try lying to me.
61. I hope someday you get a taste of your own medicine.
62. Pack you shit and go. Get the fuck out of my sight!
63. Is this how little you think of me?
64. I can’t do this anymore.. not with you.
65.Are you happy now? Huh? DOES THIS MAKE YOU HAPPY?!
66. You said you’d always be there for me… so how did this happened? Why weren’t you there?
67. Did it ever occur to you that you’re hurting me too?
68. I don’t need help! I just want the pain to stop!
69. We can be friends instead.
70. I tried to move on, but nobody is you.
71. Do I look like I’ve moved on?
72. I don’t remember a fight or a reason, so what happened? Why did we break up?
73. Can I at least buy you a coffee? For old times sake.
74. I can’t take the loneliness anymore.
75. What are you talking about? You’re married!
76. I feels like everyone just forgot I exist.
77. Maybe I’m meant to be alone.
78. I gave you your chance, and you just used it to stab me in the back.
79. I’ve been alone for so long..
80. But you promised..

SMUT:

81. I think you’ll be happy to know that I’m not wearing any underwear.
82. I want you. Right here. Right now.
83. I’d be more than happy to show you a good time, if you’re looking for one.
84. It’s like you want to ruin men/women for me.
85. It’s been a long day. Why don’t we help each other unwind?
86. Oh don’t mind me. Just enjoying the view.
87.They always make shower sex sounds so appealing, but honestly, this is getting dangerous.
88. Did you just… finish?
89. Tell me what you want.
90.Get on your knees. Now.
91.Your lips make me wonder what the rest of you would taste like..
92. I don’t like being told what to do unless I’m naked.
93. Move your hands to the side. I want to hear you.
94. You’re so sexy when you’re all hot and bothered.
95. How bad do you want me?
96. Do you know how bad I want you?
97. I’ve been thinking about this all night.98. Don’t cover your face. I want to see you.
99. Come sit in my lap.
100. You’re so beautiful all spread out like this, just for me.

sources: x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

MBTI and an Escape Room

ISFJ: “No, no, no, no”

ESFJ: *crying and furious* “This is tearing us apart! Get it together people!”

ISTJ: *Says everyone is an idiot for trying the wrong thing- never offers his own solution*

ESTJ: “I would take over, but I like watching ENFJ fail at it.”

ESTP: “Wait guys, I got this” *does something stupid* *fails*

ISTP: “If you guys would just listen to me then I could get us out of here- ok no one is listening to me, that’s fine too, whatever”

ESFP: *completely oblivious to everyone’s stress* “This is so fun!”

ISFP: *mopping in the corner* “I’m just really tired, I don’t want to do this.”

ENFP: *simply talking and rabbit trailing about random possibilities* “Hey look at this! This is so cool! Oh that’s kinda creepy…what if-”

INFP: *super chill and relaxed* “Man, this is so much fun. Hey guys- we should try and scare ISTJ”

INFJ: *Thinks he knows how to get out but can’t talk because all the tension in the room is about to make him cry*

ENFJ: *Keeps trying to create order amongst the group, but gets too emotional to handle the responsibility* 

ENTJ: *Has already planned out which one of his friends he will have to sacrifice first*

INTJ: *Knows how to get out after discussing with INFJ* *Doesn’t tell anyone because ESTJ said some rude and they want to watch ESTJ fail* 

ENTP: “Hey guys, I know what will work!” *tries something complicated and stupid* *fails* 

INTP: “My goodness, I can’t believe you guys haven’t figured it out yet, it’s so obvious” *doesn’t actually know how to get out*

Hormones

Hiyaaaaaaaaaaaaa… I did it! Finally managed to finish this one! Thank you for everyone who enjoyed the preview, I really hope you buys enjoy the full thing. Please let me know what you thought of it! Lots of love, B xx

***

Originally posted by grabiajulia

Hormones.

They’re funny little things. 

Sometimes they take over your body and make you do things that you wouldn’t ever do if it weren’t for the obscene amount of hormones coursing through your bloodstream - you’d never eat a plate full of pasta and a whole chocolate bar right after or cry at the butter commercial cause that family looks just so damn happy that they have their butter and each other… And you would not, under any circumstances, be thinking about how much you want your friend to fuck you into oblivion if it weren’t for the hormones.

Keep reading

Ok stay with me on this but...

Because Johnny has been staying with Rosita for awhile and is constantly around her kids, he accidentally calls her mom when asking her a question. At first he’s super embarrassed and that Rosita might react to it, but she doesn’t and they carry on normally to his relief. On the inside though, Rosita is so happy she wants to cry because she pretty much already sees Johnny as her son ever since he got there.

So it’s been revealed by Donghyuck that Mark did cry at the dorm after their first win but Mark told him not to tell anyone (but donghyuck betrayed him lmao) and the dreamies reaction was like “REALLY??” Like they were so shocked to know that Mark actually cried.

But I just want to point out that Donghyuck was there when Mark cried, and they probably cried together and just thinking about it makes me emo asdfghjkl the other members didn’t even know about it, like mark always acts so tough around them but he actually cried in front of Donghyuck and I JUST-😭😭😭

anonymous asked:

Do you know any fics where Yuri unintentionally breaks Victor’s heart. I'm a sucker for angst with a happy ending. Thank you ^^

DO YOU GUYS LIKE TO SEE ME IN PAIN?!??! I’m just kidding! Thank you for these requests! Here are some fics where Victor cries… *goes into a corner and cries for 10 years*

Originally posted by takemetovikturi


Victor Cries


selfish by MissSpock, Gen, 1.9k
“…Aren’t you going to stop me?” He hated how his voice wobbled and cracked, and he had to fight to keep the tears in his eyes.
Yuuri’s brows creased. The mist had cleared from the lenses of his glasses and he looked at Victor with confused, amber eyes. “Why should I? It seems as though you’ve come to a decision.” Role reversal of ep 11. *sobs*

twenty-eight by pageleaf, Gen, 864 words
“…I’m sorry, Yuuri.” Yuuri blinks. “For what?” “I disappointed you.” Viktor’s voice is hoarse. “I didn’t win.” I LOVE THIS FIC SO MUCH

I’m Always Here by queeravocado, Teen, 1.6k
It’s 3 AM. Yuuri’s reliving one of his most horrifying events in his life: the GPF before he met Victor. Victor’s a complete ass, and becomes his number one fear. Turns out it’s a dream, but Victor’s crying his eyes out after what he saw. Victor cries. It’s sad. Happy ending, though!

Talk by future_fishy, Gen, 1.2k
Viktor wasn’t himself today. Yuuri is the best at comforting Victor. Love!

kiss & cry by lostincostco, Explicit, 2.7k
“Oh,” Yuuri says wonderingly. “You’re crying.” Yuuri makes Victor cry, but not in the way you’re thinking…!!!! (this isn’t even sad, it’s just smut.. doN’T JUDGE ME IT’S GOOD OKAY?!)

Stupid Thoughts by future_fishy, Gen, 1.5k
“I’m fine, Yuuri, go back to sleep.” Still that smile. “You’re not, and I won’t.” Yuuri’s serious tone made Viktor flinch, “Please don’t lie to me.” Victor is self conscious about his future with Yuuri????? I’m sobbing?????

Where we belong by ss_blackrabbit, Teen, 1.5k
It’s true that Yuuri wanted to be hated as the man who took Viktor away from the world, but he never meant to take Viktor’s world away from him. Another ep 11 fic! Happy ending.

Comfort by future_fishy, Gen, 697 words
Viktor is upset, and Yuuri isn’t sure how to comfort him, but he tries. I’m totally not crying… *sobs*

A Melancholy Of White by mochary, Teen, 15k
“Yuuko. What’s happening?” Viktor asks sternly. “Did something happen?” “O-oh my God. Viktor-“ Yuuko cries from the other line. “It’s Y-Yuuri. He got into an accident. Viktor, t-there’s blood. P-please come immediately.” It’s then, when Viktor’s heart shatters into a million pieces. ONLY READ THIS IF YOU WANT TO BE KILLED. SERIOUSLY. MY HEART BROKE INTO FIFTY BILLION PIECES WHEN I READ THIS AND I STILL HAVEN’T RECOVERED. Really well written, though, and a happy ending!

Worthwhile by surveycorpsjean, Explicit, 6.2k
In which, it’s Victor that breaks.
So beautifully written. One of, if not my favourite, YOI anxiety/mental illness fic. Highly recommend. So f-ing sad, though.

Holding on for Dear Life by icterine, Teen, 2.4k
It turns out that sometimes heartbreak happens in seconds, unexpectedly – and once it does, there’s no dulling of the senses. Victor’s heart shatters.

just my two cents, nothing that hasn’t been said already in far better words but i wanted to write down my initial thoughts so i can look back on them later.

there are so many interesting things going on in the trailer and in the header and i don’t know where to start! 

so i’ll start from the beginning which also happens to be the end! i’m a big fan of the cyclic meta in s3 so just thinking about the possibilities this trailer offers is making me cry tears of joy. there is a chain reaction that starts with Sana and ends with Even and we’re shown it in reverse, just like i feel that Sana giving Isak back his ten percent was a reversed passing of the baton. having Sana and Even be the ones at the ends of this chain can’t be completely random considering that Even did read the quran and he did have pictures related to islam in his room. 

i think it’s also interesting to note the chain reaction Sana causes ends with Even getting hit in the face with a selfie stick? the selfie stick is such an iconic product of this era, the era of the selfie. you create a new image of yourself with your selfie, you create a personal brand. we know Sana’s brand: dark lipstick, big sunglasses, lots of black and lots of attitude. but we don’t know much about the person behind it, and i’m so excited to learn more! there are very strong images of american consumerism paired with islamic imagery in the header, and it will be interesting to see that juxtaposition explored through Sana’s eyes. in addition to the brand created by herself, as a muslim Sana is also forced to carry stigma created by racism and prejudice, so seeing how she navigates all that in year 2017 is going to be great.

using don’t let me be misunderstood by cat stevens in reverse is honestly so brilliant. people who don’t know better might think it’s arabic song, maybe even a call to prayer, because most people really do not know shit about islam even though everyone seems to have an opinion on it. quite like the london pride flag in the header that the media treated as an isis flag when in reality it was just a bunch of dildos.

i can’t believe i’m saying this but can’t we just skip the weekend and go straight to monday!

youtube

Okay I know everyone wanted to keep the song “Unstoppable” in the movie and believe me its a damn shame it was cut, but I think that the song ”More” NEEDED TO BE IN THE MOVIE BECAUSE HOLY SHIT IS IT HEARTBREAKING AND MAKES ME CRY LIKE A LITTLE BITCH! 

- It explains that Moana was given her name by Grandma Tala meaning “Ocean” and not given by her dad that wanted her to stay away from it 

- It hurts because she’s talking about the one person who truly supported her in everything Moana believed in 

- I MEAN HER GRANDMA JUST DIED AND SHE KNOWS SHE MUST COMPLETE HER CALLING MOANA IS STRONG AF

- Just the evolution of the song is amazing it goes from Moana recognizing all that her grandmother has taught her and how she wished she could stay and guide her

- Then it becomes extremely powerful as she is determined to lead her people as a true chief and fufill her duty to the sea and her tribe 

- Marcy Harriel does a beautiful rendition of the song I mean the way her voice breaks makes you bawl and how strong she belts out just makes you shook 

-BUT IMAGINE IF AULI’I CRAVALHO SANG IT ABSOLUTE  PERFECTION!!

- I’ve memorized the entire lyrics and it’s in the soundtrack and movie to me because I don’t give a fuck it didn’t deserved to be cut 

After receiving an (now not so anon anymore *waves at Jane*) ask about “Matsuhana FF8″ :3 Them COSPLAYS!

(i seriously considered leaving the dick across their faces as watermark…)
(also considering prints of this because i love…)

when you are dating or in a relationship as a person diagnosed with bpd, it’s important to have safe words. im not talking about when in sexual situations (though that might be a neat idea too) but just for everyday-use. use a certain word when you are splitting or dissociating so your partner will be aware.

also when you are being triggered, either by your partner or something/someone else, a safe word is a great tool. especially when you are in a crowded place, so your partner can help you get somewhere quiet.

a safe word can also be needed when you are in a fight with your partner and one of you crosses a line. then you’ll be able to either apologize, stop the fight or take a “time out” - a few minutes apart to cool your heads.

you might also not need it at all, but i think it’s a good idea to have one, just for safety measures? idk, it has just saved me a lot of crying and maybe even a broken heart.

I’m sitting on the floor and crying my eyes off. I feel so alone, does anyone even realise my struggle is real? that i’m in so much mental pain, standing on the edge of the cliff. Thinking about jumping, ending it all.
Not a medication or therapy can make me better. I hug my mom and say nothing, I can’t hurt her again, I just want to be with her a little longer.
I’m so scared, so physically and mentally exhausted. I sit under the shower because my legs are too weak for standing.
I’m so full of bad thoughts, full of anxiety and pain. I let part of it out with the blood, but it’s not helping. I’m trapped and so lost.

And again this writing will just fade away, get lost between other messages. And it will mean nothing

another ereri fic rec list

So I’ve been meaning to make one of these, cause I just wanted to put all of my favorite fics in one place and give my two cents on why they mean a lot to me. You’re all amazing. 

A Warm Breath - ryuusea @ryuusea

It’s pretty impossible to sum this one up with words, but it’s lovely. One of those fics that I read all the way through when I couldn’t sleep, and ended up staying awake all teary-eyed because I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I’m usually not into time skips, but this author made it work perfectly. Go. Read. It.

go ahead and cry little boy - jjibunrock @jjibunrock

This. This is my favorite story in the fandom, hands down. Deserves a lot more attention because it goes deeper than most fics do. Not your average love story. It really touches on a lot of important things, and I think every character is represented perfectly. At first I was unsure about the switching POV’s, but I think it adds a lot of depth to get both perspectives of Eren and Levi, because their personal lives play such a big role in the story. Nearly every chapter breaks my heart, but that’s part of what makes it an amazing read.

What’s Eating You? - TheSpazzBot @fuzzyporcupine

Walking Dead AU. I don’t know what I was expecting, but it turned out to be a really thrilling read. The author managed to weave a really nice (albeit unconventional, what would you expect in a zombie apocalypse) love story into a very ugly world and it’s fantastic. I couldn’t stop reading it, and I’m eagerly waiting for more.

Junkyard Dogs - acidtowns @neruas

Very dark, Prison AU that left me questioning a lot of things. Not really about the story per se. It was pretty straight forward (but not at all?). There are a lot of philosophical aspects throughout the fic that make you think. It’s all from Levi’s perspective, and there were moments that I thought he was actually insane and it was pretty frightening when it came down to it. It’s not a pretty story, but again, with the complex emotions, I have to commend the author. Really well done. 

The 6th Ward - coldmackerel

*deep breath* I think about this fic a lot. There’s a certain simplicity to it that sort of makes you sit there and wonder how a certain scene or even just a phrase from it can have wiping tears from your eyes. I’m not sure how to describe my feelings about it, because it’s genuinely a funny story, with a lot of comical moments that make you love all the characters more than you already do. But I finished the story feeling both peaceful and depressed and I’m not sure what that means. Skillful writing, I think. 

Woke Up Dead - PresquePommes @skaletal

This is another amazing read. A reincarnation AU doesn’t have as much to do with the memories themselves as it does with accepting them. It was interesting to read how Eren and Levi reacted differently to the memories from their past lives. It seemed very in character as well, the way Levi was so sure of himself from the beginning while Eren was tormented by it his whole life. I loved the story.

Augenfresser - cottontale @foxicology

Despite the warnings in almost every chapter, I still read this in the middle of the night when I couldn’t sleep. All the lights were off bc I was too lazy to turn them on and surprise! I had nightmares. Regardless of all that, this was a pretty incredible story. I was terrified throughout the whole thing, and yet it was so thick with interesting plot that I couldn’t put it down. Another thriller of a fic that ends up have a surprising amount of depth. A lot of symbolism concerning mental illness that really makes you think. I didn’t expect the ending, but I felt like I should have. It broke my heart.

River’s End - ferric @erengayer

I shied away from this one at first bc the concept of incest didn’t interest me, but I saw a lot of people recommending it, and when I finally gave it a chance it wasn’t what I expected. Reading about them growing up together and realizing it was a reincarnation AU helped me understand their relationship. The style this author has brings out a lot of thought when it comes to the meaning of love and how memory plays a very deep role in it. It’s beautiful.

Let Me Help - twisting_vine_x @twisting-vine-x

A short bed-sharing fic that has two weaknesses of mine: pining!Eren and it’s canon compliant. It’s not an epic most of these, but the author’s style generally brings out a lot of feeling in a short amount of words, and I can’t get enough of it. Go read the rest of their stories while your at it. 

A Sound Like Breaking Glass - mongoose_bite @mongoose-bite

This one is wonderful because it managed to intertwine canon and AU into the same fic, and it ended up being a really beautiful read. What I loved the most about this fic was Eren’s passion for life. That’s one thing that I love the most about his character in general, and this story captured it perfectly. What makes it heartbreaking is that it really reflects his yearning for freedom while it’s just barely out of his reach. Mm, yeah I think to much. This hits really close to home, and I’m getting a lump in my throat while I write this so I’m stopping now bye.

3 A.M. - loveatfirstsight @l-e-v-i-ackerman

This author’s style is very unique in that it’s almost always very blunt. Whether it’s a funny moment or a heartbreaking one, the voice is so distinct. Reading from an author who lays every thought and feeling out without really reserving anything was pretty amazing. Reading this story was like looking at a Jackson Pollock painting, and I can’t really compare that to anything else I’ve read. Levi is so… himself, and yet I feel like I’m getting so much of the author’s own feelings about everything when I read it. Fantastic writing.

half light - foreverautumn @foreverautumnblog

This interpretation of Eren and Levi’s characters is one of my favorites. There’s an overall peaceful feeling while I read this fic, even with all of the frustrated emotions on Eren’s part. Their characterization is perfect. What’s funny is that I say the same thing about characterization with a lot of fics, and yet everyone’s version of these characters are so, so different. This one though, it just makes me love both of them more. It’s really lovely.

The Arrangement: Part 5

Title:  The Arrangement: Part 5

Summary:  He’s a mechanic. She’s a lonely woman with more money than she knows what to do with. Fate brings them together and sparks fly. But only for six weeks. That’s the arrangement.

Need to catch up? The Arrangement Master Post

Author: Dean’s Dirty Little Secret

Characters:  Dean Winchester x Female Reader

Word Count:  2971

Warnings: NSFW, explicit language, sexual content, angst

Author’s Notes:  This is a multi-part series. Shifts between multiple points of view.

Originally posted by justjensenanddean

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