oh my god storytime because the funniest shit happened tonight
so background info, i work for a theater that does programs at schools and tonight was our last show of alice in wonderland at a middle school so we had to clear out the set and costumes and everything as soon as the show was finished. normally we rent a uhaul truck but for some reason tonight our manager got a van instead. ANYWAY…
my coworker drove the van over to the school and was running the concessions stand. after intermission he closed up the stand and was like “hey i’m gonna go bring this extra candy and stuff to the van and then i’ll bring the van around so we can load it up easier.” and then he just disappeared for the rest of the show and the rest of us were sitting around like ????
finally he returns just as the show is finished and goes “i got pulled over.”
turns out, a cop was hanging around by the school. and the streets around this school are all one-way, so when my coworker tried finding a more convenient spot to park and had no luck he had to circle back around the whole school. so a cop watched this dude in a van circling a middle school and found that suspicious.
and when he pulled my coworker over to ask what he was doing, he apparently didn’t believe my coworker’s explanation about what he was doing circling a middle school with a van and so told him to open up the back. which, of course, had nothing but candy in it.
tl;dr my coworker was nearly arrested for being a pedophile tonight and i’m fucking dying.