just testing the size of it

futuredescending  asked:

For the prompts! 49. “Well this is awkward…”

You said anything, so you get third party/original character POV Hartwin.  Ish. 

Jenny had figured out that with Kingsman you couldn’t always tell if you were in trouble, or just being tested.  

The trials had been going on for two months, the number of candidates cut in half, and she was always on her toes- even when they were technically done for the day.  So when Merlin gave her coordinates in the manor and told her to arrive promptly, she tried to be ready for anything.

She sat in an ornate sitting room, and guessed from its size and location that it belonged to someone important.  She contained her excitement, but only barely. Trouble or not, she might soon get the answers she was hoping for.  She resisted the urge to wave at the camera by the door.  

A moment later Merlin arrived, clipboard in hand, with Harry behind him.  

Harry looked in on the trials now and then, but he hadn’t given the candidates a codename to use for him.  He wasn’t the only one, but he was… special.  Jenny guessed that he was in charge because he was on the older side- and because whenever he told anyone to do anything, they did.  Merlin sat directly opposite her. Harry dropped into a chair behind him.  It was Merlin who said, “Well this is awkward.”

Keep reading

so I work at starbucks right and I was making this old lady a taste test drink to help her decide if she wanted a bigger size and I give her this drink right and as she’s about to take a drink I deadass said “take a fu-” before I stopped and realized I was really about to tell this 78 year old woman to take a fucking sip, babe

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3.14.17- a super super super late spread from late february,,,, life has been so hectic lately so i’ve been neglecting blogging again- i had three tests in one day, came down with strep throat, searched for a therapist, and had to deal with end of trimester deadlines all in just a short amount of time )); hopefully i can create a monster-sized queue and catch up with everything!

what they don’t always tell you about T within informed consent sheets, a better post

since the one going around is filled with blatant misinformation and exaggerated tales of horror to the point that i question whether its intent was good.

the first thing to expect, is that your experience will be unique. there are hundreds of factors to how hormones change your body, and while you will find people with experiences like yours, you will have a different experience. so while this is a general guideline, your experience may be that you don’t experience these things, or that you experience them with intensity. it’s so, so varied. 99% of the stuff they put on informed consent forms is prefaced with ‘YOU MIGHT -’. 

  1. regarding the smells, yes! you will smell different! that is a fact. the hormones are different in your body now, you will start to smell more like what you’d expect from people who have similar amounts of testosterone in their bodies. it can be a little weird, but it’s nothing that deodorant (and sometimes cologne, if you want!) won’t cover up and it’s nothing that’s abnormal and it’s nothing that every other human being doesn’t experience. everyone smells! you just happen to smell different than you used to.
  2. when facial hair grows, when hair everywhere else grows, you can get itchy. my face gets itchy, my head gets itchy, especially when it’s hot it can get frustrating, but it’s no cause for panic. some people might get itchier than others, but it’s just something you’ll deal with and it’s not all that bad. you’ll get used to it and think about it less and less as your body situates.
  3. binding, as with any thing you put on your chest, can cause acne! i’ve seen no difference in wearing sport bras and binders in regards to acne, i’m a DD chest, it’s just what happens when you sweat and compress your chest. having some acne between your boobs is normal, having some on your back is normal, just try to leave it alone and take showers (you can take showers without washing your hair every day if that’s an option!), it’ll be okay.
  4. as with, well, puberty, you’re going to have ups and downs of hunger. sometimes i can just never stop eating! sometimes i don’t feel hungry at all. it’s good to keep track of how much you eat generally and try not to overeat, but you might get cravings for more carb-heavy foods because puberty 2 takes a lot of energy for your body! eating more than normal is, well, normal. drinking a lot of water and things like orange juice can help even this out and it will benefit you in a lot of ways (like keeping your immune system healthy).
  5. your clit will probably grow. it can be kind of jarring, but it’s something you get used to, and everyone experiences this one with a WIDE range of difference. some people only get an inch or so in growth (mine is huge now and it’s still so weird but also so cool), some people can have their clit grow to much bigger! some people can feel their boners, some people get morning wood, and you might feel it in your pants and wearing tight underwear might not be the best in that case, try wearing boxers and loose clothes around the house as much as you can, as well as not wearing your binder too much.
  6. voice drops happen so suddenly you won’t even see them coming, but once the first one happens, you can get a feel for it. usually your voice cracks for a couple weeks/months, SUDDENLY gets deeper, levels off, then cracks again, repeat. it can be sudden, and it also creeps up on you. try keeping logs of your voice, you’ll be so shocked at the difference that only a few months can make! also, people around you will notice your voice changes before you do unless you’re constantly going back on old videos. 
  7. acne is inevitable. to what degree? totally dependent on the person. genetics and health play a big role. you’ll get acne in places you haven’t before, but eventually it will level out. it’s not going to be forever, you have to keep in mind this is second puberty and puberty means random and weird shit! like unfortunate acne! it will pass. try to ignore it as much as you can. 
  8. my period stopped at 4 months in. occasionally, i still get phantom cramps. not for very long usually, but you have to remember that your body has a rhythm, and you’re interrupting that. it’s going to take a while for it to switch gears! talk to your endo/doctor if your pains are excruciating to the point of hospitalization/etc because that can be a sign that something is wrong. also, you usually do blood tests every few months to make sure the hormones are working fine. my periods when i started T ranged from no pain at all and debilitating pain, and i’m someone who previously had extremely painful periods. this gets less common over time! 
  9. try not to do any drugs/alcohol before getting your blood tests done. my endocrinologist knows that i do have weed occasionally and so far that hasn’t been a problem but i think drinking is something you should avoid with blood tests coming up for your safety so they don’t report problems that aren’t there. you’re not going to get in trouble for any of this, you just need to tell them.
  10. every person has a different T dose. i take 100 every other week because of various things: my size, my weight, how the hormones already are in my body. i know some people who are on 200, some who are on 50 weekly, it depends on what your PROFESSIONAL DOCTOR thinks is safe for you, and they WILL adjust accordingly if the need arises between both of you. taking more T than you’re prescribed with the intention of getting quicker effects will actually slow the process and make your body produce more estrogen and can hurt you. you don’t want that! 
  11. it’s not shameful to set up appointments for your shots or not be able to do them yourself, and if you do them yourself it’s okay to mess it up. believe me, i have. every injection is different, but you get a feel for it and mess up less. they would not let you do it at home if it wasn’t safe enough. just watch videos, know what you’re getting into. getting blood drawn hurts more for me than my T shots. it’s okay that sometimes it takes you forever, or no time at all. T shots are your thing and your experience and your choice on how is the most comfortable for you. most doctors prescribe different injection sites based on what they think is best, all of them work. one person doing it in their leg doesn’t negate that it also works in the ass but if you’re told to do it one way, stick to that or talk it out with your doctor to come up with an alternative! the amount of blood that comes out of the injection site is different with each one, the angle is different, and i would HEAVILY SUGGEST sitting down for a while after a shot. one of my shots, i stood up right after and after about 5 minutes of walking i noticed oil just, coming out of the site and down my leg. it was horrible. gravity is your friend and also your enemy, use it wisely. the level of pain with each shot is different too, and remember that needles are supposed to only be put in something once. if you fuck up an injection and pull out too fast or anything, switch out the needle because if you don’t, the tip is more blunt (you probably won’t be able to tell with your plain eyes) and will hurt much more than the first time. shots are weird, each one is an entirely different beast but you’ll get it down. 
  12. T can make you more emotional. REMEMBER - puberty 2! it’s not going to turn you into a raging frothing beast, but if you’re already prone to anger, already prone to frustration, it’s going to happen! i’m prone to getting claustrophobic and stressed out, and T has made that worse, but over time i’ve come to manage it and over time it evens out and i experience it less and less. with hormones comes mood shifts. it’s perfectly reasonable and it’s easier than puberty 1, since you can see it coming and can calm yourself down easier and you know what’s causing it. i get frustrated more easily sometimes, but i sit down, breathe, and know that it’s the hormones, and it makes it SO MUCH easier to deal with.
  13. your genitals in general might get drier. might be the opposite. mine is the latter. my libido is NUTS, it can be weird, but for some people it’s not like that. again, completely dependent on the person. either direction or no change at all, you can expect anything. 
  14. your immune system is weaker and your body is putting a lot of energy into these changes. be aware of that, please for the love of all that’s good wash your hands, stay clear of sick people as much as you can, and try to eat and drink healthy, generally. you might catch colds and the colds can turn worse than most, but being hygienic is the best way to prevent any of that. 
  15. if you stop T, your periods will come back. some medications can’t work with T like some birth control, and before starting any medication please check in with your doctor before to make sure that it’s safe. use your best judgment and be conscious of your health.
  16. T is not an overnight experience. changes take a long time, some longer than others, and being patient is incredibly important. don’t get frustrated at your body, it’s doing it’s best. you’ll get there, some slower and some faster than others. it’s different for everyone. but you WILL get there if you want to get there. 
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L'Oréal just created EpiSkin, lab-grown skin that combats animal testing

  • The cosmetics industry is notorious for testing products on animals.
  • L'Oréal, which has discontinued animal testing unless it’s mandated by law, tests its ingredients and products on lab-made human skin that has become an industry in and of itself.
  • L’Oreal’s dime-sized synthetic human skin product is called EpiSkin, reports CNBC, and the company acquired the technology in 1997.
  • It makes the need to test ingredients on live animals in lab tests obsolete. Read more (5/30/17)

y’know sometimes I really think about how Fallout New Vegas was an actual game that happened 

like, this was a game in a series that’s about a post-apocalyptic wasteland with a 50′s esque setting. The main character is usually from a vault or has a connection to a vault and has some goal that mostly involved saving someone, you tend to run around a shithole filled with mutated abominations and bloodthirsty raiders

and then you get this game that just 

like Fallout New Vegas was a game that included: 

  • mass murdering roman legionary cosplayers 
  • post apocalyptic cowboys and cowboy robots 
  • a dominatrix zombie 
  • a sexbot called ‘Fisto’ that you can test-fuck 
  • an entire clan of Elvis impersonators 
  • Chandler from Friends 
  • fucking giant killer wasps twice the size of a person
  • a bunch of Genghis Khan cosplayers 
  • old ladies that try to mug you with rolling pins
  • a casino that’s secretly a bunch of cannibals 

And the main character, well

Fallout 1: Your from a Vault and you have to find a water chip to save your vault.
Fallout 2: you’re from a tribe descended from a vault and you have to find a GECK to save you village.
Fallout 3: your from a vault and you have to find your dad and save the wasteland. 

Fallout New Vegas: You’re a fucking mailman from christ knows where and you have to find the asshole who shot you and then fuck up the mojave two ways from sunday. 

I dunno I just think this game was a wondrous masterpiece 

Cracked this Tinder thing

Okay so I think I have actually cracked Tinder for sugar babies. My profile reads “I enjoy the company of classy older men who love to spoil me. I’m intelligent, curvy, vibrant and would love to get to know you over cocktails next to the waterfront.”

Then I match with guys with signs they’re wealthy in their profiles, then they message and always mention something about spoiling me. So I say okay let’s go out for lunch, take a walk then do a bit of shopping. And they’re so down. Then on the shopping trip you can test their generosity and get a sense for whether they’re worth seeing again.

Salts will just unmatch and disappear because they know they will have to buy you things from the start. It also sets it up so that it is clear to them I do not come for free and my tastes are expensive.

Space Missions Come Together in Colorado

Our leadership hit the road to visit our commercial partners Lockheed Martin, Sierra Nevada Corp. and Ball Aerospace in Colorado. They were able to check the status of flight hardware, mission operations and even test virtual reality simulations that help these companies build spacecraft parts.

Let’s take a look at all the cool technology they got to see…

Lockheed Martin

Lockheed Martin is the prime contractor building our Orion crew vehicle, the only spacecraft designed to take humans into deep space farther than they’ve ever gone before.

Acting NASA Deputy Administrator Lesa Roe and Acting NASA Administrator Robert Lightfoot are seen inside the CHIL…the Collaborative Human Immersive Laboratory at Lockheed Martin Space Systems in Littleton, Colo. Lockheed Martin’s CHIL enables collaboration between spacecraft design and manufacturing teams before physically producing hardware.

Cool shades! The ability to visualize engineering designs in virtual reality offers tremendous savings in time and money compared to using physical prototypes. Technicians can practice how to assemble and install components, the shop floor can validate tooling and work platform designs, and engineers can visualize performance characteristics like thermal, stress and aerodynamics, just like they are looking at the real thing.

This heat shield, which was used as a test article for the Mars Curiosity Rover, will now be used as the flight heat shield for the Mars 2020 rover mission.

Fun fact: Lockheed Martin has built every Mars heat shield and aeroshell for us since the Viking missions in 1976.

Here you can see Lockheed Martin’s Mission Support Area. Engineers in this room support six of our robotic planetary spacecraft: Mars Odyssey, Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter, MAVEN, Juno, OSIRIS-REx and Spitzer, which recently revealed the first known system of seven Earth-size planets around a single star, TRAPPIST-1. They work with NASA centers and the mission science teams to develop and send commands and monitor the health of the spacecraft.

See all the pictures from the Lockheed Martin visit HERE

Sierra Nevada Corporation

Next, Lightfoot and Roe went to Sierra Nevada Corporation in Louisville, Colo. to get an update about its Dream Chaser vehicle. This spacecraft will take cargo to and from the International Space Station as part of our commercial cargo program.

Here, Sierra Nevada Corporation’s Vice President of Space Exploration Systems Steve Lindsey (who is also a former test pilot and astronaut!) speaks with Lightfoot and Roe about the Dream Chaser Space System simulator.

Lightfoot climbed inside the Dream Chaser simulator where he “flew” the crew version of the spacecraft to a safe landing. This mock-up facility enables approach-and-landing simulations as well as other real-life situations. 

See all the images from the Sierra Nevada visit HERE.

Ball Aerospace

Lightfoot and Roe went over to Ball Aerospace to tour its facility. Ball is another one of our commercial aerospace partners and helps builds instruments that are on NASA spacecraft throughout the universe, including the Hubble Space Telescope and the New Horizons mission to Pluto. Ball designed and built the advanced optical technology and lightweight mirror system that will enable the James Webb Space Telescope to look 13.5 billion years back in time. 

Looking into the clean room at Ball Aerospace’s facility in Boulder, Colo., the team can see the Ozone Mapping Profiler Suite. These sensors are used on spacecraft to track ozone measurements.

Here, the group stands in front of a thermal vacuum chamber used to test satellite optics. The Operation Land Imager-2 is being built for Landsat 9, a collaboration between NASA and the U.S. Geological Survey that will continue the Landsat Program’s 40-year data record monitoring the Earth’s landscapes from space.

See all the pictures from the Ball Aerospace visit HERE

We recently marked a decade since a new era began in commercial spaceflight development for low-Earth orbit transportation. We inked agreements in 2006 to develop rockets and spacecraft capable of carrying cargo such as experiments and supplies to and from the International Space Station. Learn more about commercial space HERE.

Make sure to follow us on Tumblr for your regular dose of space: http://nasa.tumblr.com

girlfriend just delivered me a box of candy canes and here is my new personality test to replace MBTI or astrology or whatever

  • the Cruncher: you start at the hook end and chew your candy cane to pieces. you are forthright and impatient. behind your back people call you an asshole, but lovingly. how do you cope with that much hard candy stuck in your teeth.
  • the Snapper: you start at the hook end and snap off bite-sized pieces, eating each piece before you unwrap the next segment. you are life’s natural planner. so orderly you probably use colour-coded excel spreadsheets for your groceries. you never forget to do all that seasonal cleaning apartment therapy tells me to do and i never do. like dusting your baseboards. you probably do that.
  • the Unwrapper: you start at the long end and unwrap the whole thing so you can clutch it stickily in your bare hands. you beautiful rule-breaking moth. nobody should touch a candy cane with their bare fingers. what is wrong with you.
  • the Shiv: you start at the long end and suck it into the deadliest seasonal weapon. you definitely have siblings. probably you were raised in a household where weapons as toys were discouraged. probably you’re also kind of awkwardly masochistic.

side note. if you like the fruit flavoured candy cane better than the peppermint one, you’re wrong. straight-up just wrong.

Brave Williams from New York is just 17 but is already 7ft 1 and growing

Towering over his teammates at 7ft 1in tall, 17-year-old Brave Williams is hoping his height can help propel him to sporting stardom.

The 400lb senior at Lake Shore High School in Angola, New York, is already a highly-regarded member of his high school basketball and American football teams.

And the youngster is now setting his sights on winning a much-coveted college athletic scholarship.

‘When I was five years old, I was like 5ft 3in.’

'The teachers thought I was actually a second grader, so they put me in the wrong class for about an hour before they realised their mistake.’

'I had to tell them that I was just starting school.’

However, Brave very nearly didn’t make it to even his first birthday - he had to be delivered via caesarian because the umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck.

'The doctors tried to pull me out three times before they were going to take more drastic measures. But as soon as my dad touched my mom’s forehead, I let go, and the doctors got me out,’ Brave told high school sports site MaxPreps.

'My dad instantly named me Brave because I needed a strong name.’

Specialists were concerned that he might be suffering from a form of gigantism known as Sotos syndrome, but tests done at three months and again at three years came back clear - much to the relief of his mother Angela.

She said: 'Every day he grew more and more, so that was when I got worried.

'To finally get the word that you have just got a tall kid was really relieving to say the least.’

Brave is now 7ft 1in tall - the same as Basketball Hall of Fame legend Shaquille O'Neal - but experts predict will be 7ft 5in by the time he stops growing, the same size as his great-great uncle.

Brave said: 'He made a pine tree look like a sapling. So, I think that’s where I got most of my height from.’

Born of African-American and Native American heritage, Brave lives on the Cattaraugus Reservation in the Seneca Nation of Indians.

The tall teen sleeps in a custom-made bed, although his feet still dangle off the end, and wears size 21 shoes.

While Brave’s size makes him killer on the court, it does also attract unwelcome attention in the form of stares and comments.

Mom Angela said: 'It was tough for me when my son turned five because then he had to go to school and I had to share him with the world.

'It was hard because he is sensitive and people stare, they look, they point.

'Now he’ll take the time to talk to everybody, people ask him the same questions over and over again - “How tall are you? Are you a wrestler? Are you this? Are you that?” And he just takes the time to respond, that’s his special gift.’

Brave is now determined to go on and become a pro athlete, but says he wants to go to college and complete his studies first - and would like to major in engineering.

And for 5ft 9in Angela, Brave’s stature is more than just an accident of genetics.

'I thought about my son being tall for a long time, and I think there is a reason why he’s so tall - because it gets him noticed and makes people listen to him,’ she added.

'But the rest is what matters, what really makes him special. I know he’s going to do big things.’

Source

Teen Wolf Preference – He walks in on you naked

Once again, thank you @pissheadofficial, my source of SHARED filthy ideas.

Warnings: Some of them have SLIGHT sexual content (heh what ya think..)

Scott McCall

Scott had a habit to climb through your window at night. You knew roughly what time he used to come by and you decided to change into something more comfortable to sleep in before he arrived, instead of always having to go into the bathroom to change every time.

You started to undress and search for the shorts you use to sleep in when you heard a gust of wind behind you. “Man, now I REALLY don’t regret arriving earlier.” the familiar voice behind you made you turn around in terror.

The smirking face of Scott met yours and you quickly took your dirty shirt and tried to cover your bare body. “Scott!” you squealed with widened eyes and he just nodded in appreciation.

You cursed under your breath as you bend down to gather the rest of your clothes but kept on drop your clothes and Scott still stood in front of your window, smiling proudly as he eyed you up and down. “Stop staring and get out!”

He shook his head and you roared at him, still panicking over your naked body, deciding to run towards the bathroom with or without clothes. You yanked backwards by an overly strong and warm hand gripping around your forearm.

Your naked back flushed against Scott’s chest as he was able to lean in to whisper in your ear. “No, I’m not going anywhere.” panting as he spoke. “You’re coming over here.”

Stiles Stilinski

“Holy-moly!” you got surprised by the slight numb voice of Stiles behind you. You turned around and flinched, realizing you didn’t wore a shirt, neither pants, or a bra, or panties..

“Stiles!” you gasped as you saw him standing in the door opening. His mouth was slightly open and his mesmerized gaze were focused on your body. “I wasn’t prepared for this-” he began and raised his eyebrows.

“But I like it.” he continued with what you thought was him being seductive and approached you. You furrowed your brows as he took a few step forward, his brown eyes almost piercing you were you stood, face slightly red due to his affection.

“I mean, WOW!” Stiles exclaimed with the most flustered face you’ve seen as he gesture towards your body. You followed the motions of his hands just to freeze when your eyes met his crotch.

You let out a muffled giggle, making Stiles look at you in confusion. “Stiles? Is that a boner?” you asked boldly with a smirk, quirking your eyebrows as you met his eyes again.

His gaze moved towards himself and immediately tried to cover it. His face turned even more red as he stumbled backwards towards the door. “Shit, I-” he began and hit his back in the door frame, letting the door guide him out from your room. “B-bye Y/N.”

Liam Dunbar

It was 10 minutes left until Liam’s arrival. You had invited him over to help him study for his test on Friday. You wrinkled your nose after sniffing your armpit, unbuttoned your shirt with one hand, letting the other one trying to open the buckle of your bra.

“I can’t invite him over and smell like crap.” you mumbled to yourself and decided to undress completely just to find a whole new outfit, all from underwear to your favorite over-sized cardigan.

“So I thought about what you’ve said about the combinations of the amino acids and-” Liam were looking intently down in his folders of papers, not realizing what he walked in on. You froze and your eyes widened as you held your clean underwear in your hand, smiling at him always being so unaware of his surroundings.

He closed the door behind you, still not looking at you as you answered him. “-yes Liam?” you replied him, with the most exaggerated seductive voice you could disguise.

Liam turns around slowly, meeting your eyes. You flash him a smirk as you place your hand on your hip as you pop it, twirling your underwear between your fingers.

In what seem to be in slow motion, he drops all his books, papers flying around him as his eyes Liam’s eyes widen, mouth drops and the mortification immediately covers his face as he tries to talk. 

“I-I, I’m-” he stutter before he quickly turns around, opens the door, hits his nose on the frame, leaving a trail of blood before running out from your room. When he close the door behind him you can’t help but let out a giggle.

Brett Talbot

You didn’t hear anything due to the harsh sound of your nearly broken hairdryer. The sound might resemble a nuclear power plant and you didn’t hear that someone had opened your door and stepped in.

Brett caught you in action just in that time when you had blow dried your hair upside down and were flipping your hair back over your shoulders, making it look quite sensual as Brett had seen it in slow motion. “Save that for tonight Y/N.” he purred and you dropped the hair dryer on the floor, almost hitting your foot but flinched in the right second.

“What the hell! What are you doing here? Get out!” you roared in panic and grabbed the wet towel you had hung on the back of the chair beside you, trying to cover your body as Brett pursed his lips into a smirk before stepping backwards out from the room.

“Woah.” Brett sighed for himself, he felt his heart rate increase in his chest when he realized what he had walked in to. He leaned back against the door and thought about how beautiful your naked body were in the daylight. He’d only seen the dark silhouette of it when you had sex during late nights, when your parents were asleep.

Theo Raeken

You’ve told Theo a thousand times not to come to your place until 8 p.m. since you wanted to get home from practice and shower before his arrival.

The clothes you had decided to wear laid properly on the end of your bed, waiting for you to put them on as you stood in front of your bookshelf, taking your brush out from one of the shelves to start to even out the wet tangles in your hair.

“Nice.” the hiss of Theo’s voice made you freeze, then turning around just to see the door to your room were wide open, having him leaning against the door frame. “THEO!” you quickly dive down the floor to look after something to cover your naked body with.

You felt your heart start to pound in your chest as you saw him lick his bottom lip before taking it between his teeth. “What are you doing?” you tried to sound threatening but your voice betrayed you when you spoke.

With a quirk of his eyebrow, he tugged the hem of his shirt, lifting the fabric over his head to let it fall to the floor. He started to striding towards you, having his dark gaze eyeing you up and down as he approached you and with just that look, he was devouring you.

The Signs as High School Teachers

Aries: Gym teacher who’s probably having an affair with one of the students?incredibly scary, hasn’t figured out how to use an inside voice. still hot though ;)

Taurus: will make you take your shoes off and sit in a circle with a candle in the middle. that one who gives tests that have absolutely fucking nothing to do with what you’ve been learning. unnecessarily angry if you’re 2 minutes late

Gemini: so fucking smart. just cant get it across to you in a way you understand. they’re really nice, but will probably spend 20 minutes telling you about their childhood growing beans in mexico DEFINITELY A SCIENCE TEACHER

Cancer: the kind of teacher who gives you print outs that are already trimmed down to size. probably gets walked all over by the students but loved by everyone

Leo: that one who needs to chill. constantly reminding you of how many days till exams and giving random tests and shit. screams MITOCHONDRIA IS THE POWERHOUSE OF THE CELL 5 times every lesson. reminds you you’ll fail regularly

Virgo: They’ve made you and 20 other students cry because your project was the wrong file type and not supported by their laptop. Lowkey want to cry everytime you look at them.

Libra: ohmyfuckinggod tears you fucking a p a r t . Encourages you to share your opinion just so they can rip you and your self worth to shreds in a “healthy debate”

Scorpio: that teacher you see like once a month. you constantly have supply for their lessons. probably is actually a really good teacher but is too busy going on school trips to ghana

Sagittarius: Has no lesson plan. Ever. And you always seem to finish working twenty minutes before the end of the lesson. Yet you somehow still end up getting As in their tests?? How? ! ??

Capricorn: their lessons are so boring. textbook work all of the time, and frequent tests. you probably do well, but you want to get hit by a car everytime you think about going to their class

Aquarius: CONDESCENDING. they never say anything but you feel like you’re being judged constantly. you give your opinion on a topic and they reply with an “okay” before inviting someone else to speak, who they KNOW will contradict you

Pisces: Manipulates you into doing extra work for something?? always asking you’re okay as well and recommending you speak to the school counsellor every lesson. genuinely cares about your mental health

just a quick doodad bc I don’t blog about it bc this is a horse blog but I brought the drama to it:

I super support rescue. I also super support responsible breeding and buying of pets and working animals.

I have two rescue horses, a rescue cat, and a dog that came from a breeder.

The first three I was able to adopt because I was happy for them to be pets. I didn’t know anything about their backgrounds, I didn’t know anything about them, and I was happy to rehabilitate them.

I got my dog from a breeder because she’s a service dog prospect, and so I wanted a very specific type of dog, with certain guaranteed physical traits and certain genetic behavioral predispositions. I wanted to be able to guarantee that she was raised and socialized to fit my needs. None of these were things I could guarantee from a rescue dog.

Responsible breeders do not contribute to pet overpopulation. Irresponsible breeders, who are trying to breed for money, who had an oops litter, who do not test their dogs for genetic disease or physical flaws, who do not track bloodlines, who do not plan homes for their puppies, who are not working specifically to improve their breed, who just breed for the funzies, are the ones contributing to pet overpopulation.

Responsible breeders aren’t working to turn a quick buck. They’re working to preserve or improve a breed. Depending on the size of their operation, maybe they’ll have a litter a year, maybe a litter every few years. They’ll usually have a waiting list. They’ll carefully scope out candidates who want a pup, find out what kind of dog they’re looking for, examine all of the puppies’ different traits at an early age, and work to put the pups in the right homes. If there’s a super drivey pup with maybe a tiny physical flaw that means it won’t do well in the show ring, they’ll give it to a working home. If there’s a more low-key pup, they’ll give it to a pet home. If there’s an absolutely perfect puppy, they’ll probably keep it for themselves, to work and show and use to (again) improve the breed. And almost every single one of them will ask that the puppy be returned to them if the new owner can’t keep them. Many of these breeders will remain in contact with the new owners and even showcase the accomplishments of the dogs on their websites as they grow up, to show the quality of animal they are producing. They are invested in the future of these animals.

Badmouthing breeders overall does not help to reduce the number of unwanted pets. Responsible breeders are not the ones whose dogs end up in shelters. And those responsible breeders often do a better job than shelters at keeping dogs in homes. Breeders make prospective owners wait, do their research, and pick them out the right dog for them. Meanwhile, many shelters (my own local shelter included) will let you walk in and adopt a dog on the same day, without so much as a home inspection (unless the dog is a certain breed that they says requires a fence, in which case all that’s required is the fence, and then you’re good to go!). Many shelters are not invested in the future of these animals; as much as they may care, they do not have the resources to track animals that have been adopted, or ensure that they’re succeeding in their new homes, or ensure that they’ve stayed in those homes. Rescues also almost universally perform a pediatric spay, which has been shown more and more to have a negative impact on a dog’s health longterm.

There are shitty shelters just like there are shitty breeders. The problem is not as simple as ‘rescue, don’t buy, while shelter animals die’. As usual, black and white pronouncements are catchy, but unhelpful.

I’ve volunteered a ton in rescue. That’s why so many of my pets are rescues. But I have seen questionable things happen behind closed doors at rescue organizations. I’ve seen animals adopted out to people who couldn’t properly care for them. I’ve seen animals returned after hurting or scaring someone. My own rescue horse has taken years to get to a safe place. I took that on because I accepted the responsibility and I wanted the challenge. Someone with a rosey-eyed view of rescue could have taken him in and been seriously injured.

Rescue does not guarantee a happily ever after story, and breeders are not all assholes out there trying to turn a buck.

Irresponsible breeding, irresponsible rehoming, and irresponsible ownership is the problem. People need to be educated about where their animals come from and how to care for them appropriately. Ignorance is the problem.