just shut up and stop joking about it

Zodiac as things they need to stop doing

Aries: stop everything and just focus on one thing

Taurus: stop…. stop stopping, start moving

Gemini: stop making a joke every other minute

Cancer: stop being so sad, not everything is your fault

Leo: stop trying to convince yourself you’re not loved

Virgo: stop worrying about how you look, you look gr8

Libra: stop flirting w everyone thanks

Scorpio: stop tryin to b scary we know ur a softie

Sagittarius: stop talking

Capricorn: stop taking everything so seriously, especially yourself

Aquarius: STOP FUCKING THINKING EVERYTHING IS SUPERFICIAL YOU’RE NOT DEEP FOR IT YOU’RE NOT SMART FOR IT, SHUT THE HELL UP JESUS CHRIST DO YOU EVER STOP LOOKING DOWN ON PEOPLE FOR HAVING FUN, WE GET IT, JUST BECAUSE THE WORLD IS UNJUST DOESNT MEAN WE HAVE TO SPEND EVERY MOMENT BEING A STICK IN THE MUD, IT SUCKS, WE ALL HAVE HARDSHIPS, YOU DONT HAVE TO TALK ABOUT IT EVERY GODDAMN SECOND AND MAKE EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT. YES EVERYTHING IS A SOCIAL CONSTRUCT BUT YOU’RE  A SOCIAL CREATURE, DEAL WITH IT YOU DING DONG DIPSHIT. STOP THINKING YOU’RE ABOVE IT ALL JUST CAUSE YOU’RE SAD

Pisces: stop thinking you relate to everything

Always My Girl (Kendall Jenner Imagine)

Request: No 

Pairing: Kendall Jenner x Reader (Y/N) 

Warnings: Explicit language

Word count: 988

NOTE: Unedited! Just a quick writing, hope you all like it :)

- REQUESTS ARE OPEN, SLOW UPDATES- 

Originally posted by kendalljbrasil

I sat in the car, my legs shut tightly and lips pressed together while I tried not to breakdown for the fourth time since we’ve gotten into Kendall’s car.

Stop worrying, you pussy.

“Y/N. Please. You’re biting your lips and the last thing I want is to have you eat me up with those chapped lips” I knew she was joking and I knew better not to think about how her pussy felt between my tongue and mouth at the moment.

“Kendall, we’ve been together for what? Two months? And I’m meeting your family. Not to mention that you have like fifty people in your family”

“You’re overreacting. They’ll like you. I like you! Please stop worrying” she said, glancing at me for a second and giving her full attention to the road again.

She was in a pale blue blouse that made her nipples slightly seen and she had jeans that hugged her beautiful legs delicately.

Although, the last thing on my mind was her body when I was nervous as hell.

I ignored her cheerful talk -although, it did not help me to cheer up even the slightest- and continued to look around to see if we’re close. Cause if we were, I was going to try and escape.

“Okay. There we are” Kendall looked at me through her sunglasses and smiled.

“Can we do this another time? Please? I’m not feeling well and honestly, I feel like I’m going to shit myself any minute” I sighed again, touching my chapped lips which was something I always did when I felt nervous.

She let go of the steering wheel and a small giggle left her mouth.

“Come on babe. They’re already fond of you. Kylie already follows you on Instagram and mom made your favorite pie for tonight. Please Y/N?”

“Fuck this. Let’s get to it, my tits are freezing!” I let out a shriek and closed the car door behind me.

Kendall was already in front of me, waiting for me to hold her hand and walk towards the door.

She guided me through their front porch and we stood in front of the huge white door.

“Ready?” Kendall asked and waited for my approval.

“Wait. How do I look? Do I look okay”

“You look perfect, please stop worrying. I promise everything will go great” She gave my hand a squeeze which was interlocked with hers and rung the doorbell which made me even more nervous.

If that was even possible?

I heard the laughter coming from the house and gulped.

It shouldn’t be this hard, right?

I’m not meeting Obama. They’re just Kendall’s family. And they happen to be worldwide famous. 

No biggie.

“Look who’s here! We’ve been waiting for you two since this morning!” Kendall’s mom opened the door with her signature smile -I watch them on TV, so what- and hugged her daughter lovingly.

“Hey mom. Sorry, it took us long”

“Oh shush! And you must be Y/N! Come here,” before I took in what was happening, I found myself inside Kris Jenner’s arms.

She smelled like expensive perfume and…maybe a bit of wine?

“Hey,” I tried to make a conversation and awkwardly hugged her back.

I probably looked so weird.

“Please honey, come in. They’re all waiting for you two! We’re hungry,” Kris smiled and led the way, us following behind her and me looking like a lost puppy.

The Jenner household’s hall was decorated with two chandeliers on the ceiling and black and white coloured ceramic tiles on the floor. I held myself back from gasping at every single glamorous decorative object in the hall.

After ten minutes, we were sat at the long dinner table, everyone was chatting and having a small talk around me.

“You okay,” Kendall looked me in the eyes and touched my arm that was covered in lace material which felt quite itchy on my skin for a second.

I nodded softly and smiled back.

“So, how did you two meet?” I glanced at the voice that asked the question and saw Khloe smiling at us.

I was so nervous that I could even forget my name.

“Um…we met through mutual friends. At a club,” I smiled shyly.

“Nice! How old are you again?”

“I’m eighteen” I answered Kim’s question feeling a bit more relaxed.

“Do your parents know about you and Kenny?” This time, Kylie shoot the question with her wine glass on one hand and I felt myself visibly gulping.

I was literally sweating under the huge chandeliers and my tongue felt too dry.

“Actually…my parents don’t know about me” I hesitantly answered and waited for someone to roast me.

Or even kick me out?

I couldn’t even look Kylie in the eye while answering her question.

“Kylie, it’s none of your business” Khloe cut the silence and I felt the tension between each of us on the table.

“No- no. It’s okay!” I quickly spoke and gave a small smile to both of them.

Literally a small smile. Maybe even a half?

“No, I’m sorry, it’s really none of my business. Sorry for asking,”

“More pie anyone?” Kris finally cut the tension between us and offered more pie -apple pie, heck yeah- and I couldn’t be happier.

“I’ll get some,” Kourtney chime in.

They were all very nice and as the minutes passed, I felt myself getting relieved and more relaxed in front of them.

“You okay?” Kendall turned her attention to me and put a strand of hair behind my ear.

I shyly nodded and felt my stomach dancing in excitement.

“I love you,” she whispered while she leant in and kissed below my ear which made me squirm and giggle.

“I love you too, Kenny”

“You’re always gonna be my girl, you know that right?” She asked and I made an inhuman voice inside my head wishing that she didn’t notice my facial expression.

“I wouldn’t want anyway around”


DON’T FORGET TO TELL ME HOW YOU LIKED IT!

the paedophile jokes directed to vik really need to stop. like i get it funny jokes in cah about vik liking 12 yr olds because he plays minecraft hah hah hilarious. but to see disgusting jokes about the subject with him tagged in it just disgusts me.
like you can see when in like cah theres a gross card directed to him he gets like lowkey uncomfortable and then i just see people tweeting him that??? like?? wyd?
the jokes arent even funny or creative anymore its getting so old.
and apparently someone asked him at upload “how many kids he has in his basement” like i get it on like tumblr you can make your shit jokes but to ask that when youre there what the actual fuck?? like you dont say that to people wtf
like boohoo a vik stan ranting!1!1!!1 but like seriously think about it, how would you feel if you got that shit every day?

straight people after ive called them out on their bs: NO IM NOT HOMOPHOBIC!!! just because i don’t support gay marriage and dont want gay/trans people near my children doesn’t mean im homophobic!!! im not scared of gays!! stop being so sensitive u sjw !! 

straight people after ive made a silly joke about cishets: UHHH exCUSE ??? juST BECAUSE GAY peOPLE HAVE BEEN DISCRIMINaTED AGAINST DOESNT meAN YOU CAN SHIT ON STRAIGHT PEOPLE. THis IS OPPRESSION. thIS IS HETEROPHOBIA. StoP BEING SO MEAN TO THE HETS YOU *insert insult here*!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!

Cishet, or all a-spec?

If you call yourself a aphobe, it is not just the cishets.

If you call yourself an aphobe, even if you just joke about being  aphobic, you hurt all of us.

You say “Only cishets, I love all my LGBT ace/aro people”
But that is a lie.
When the ‘good’ -spec people speak up and say you make them hurt, this should make you think.

When LGBT ace and aros tell you that your words harm them, this should make you stop and question yourself and stop using such terms and posting such things.
If you really love your LGBT ace and aros, and not just the ones who keep their mouth shut or even walk with you.

When you are an aphobe you are against all aces and aros. But you tolerate those who are the ‘good’ kind of a-spec.
You do not love them, you do not protect them.
You proudly, jokingly hate part of what they are.

If they dare to speak up, it is so easy for you to kick them out, to hate them too, to harm them on purpose.
You do not love your LGBT a-spec people, only as long as they go along with what you say.
After that you are free to hate and harm those formerly good a-spec LGBT people.

You know of what that reminds me?

Keep reading

curiouskurona  asked:

hey anon, why dont you stop hiding like a fucking coward? stop attacking max. come after me if youre so pathetic and unhappy that you need to drag other people down with death wishes and bullshit. come on. say that to my fucking face, off anon.

I wishes these anons would just shut up, honestly. I never said I hated straight/cis people, I literally just made a joke and got torrents of anon hate.

Not to mention the fact that they’re all using slurs that remind me of things I’d rather not think about.

2

(Requested by Anon)

“You have got to be joking.” Edward hissed under his breath. You shrank back at his venomous tone. You had been so off in dreamland that you had forgotten that your brother could read minds. You know I’m not joking Edward. I like him. I enjoy his company.

“He tried to kill us Y/N!” You bit your lip. Yeah but he had his reasons… Oh shut up Edward. It’s not your business anyway. Yes I feel this way, no I’m not joking. Just deal with it. “I’d love to see what he has to say about that.” Edward rolled his eyes.

The sound of footsteps hitting the floor caught your attention. Just by the smell alone you knew exactly who it was. You resisted the urge to swoon. “That’s disgusting.” Edward muttered.

“What is? Hello my friends.” Aro stopped in front of the two of you, looking between you with an interested gleam in his eye. “Nothing. Nothing at all Aro.” You assured quickly. He raised an eyebrow but let it be.

“Very well. Enjoy the rest of your day.” He walked around you, barely brushing his hand against yours. You froze just as the smile appeared on his face. Oh god please don’t tell me… You looked to Edward, who nodded. 

Aro turned around and flashed you a charming smile that made you weak in the knees. “By the way Y/N, who don’t you join me in the astronomy tower tonight? I’d love to show you the view.” He offered. You nodded quickly, thanking the fact that you had no blood to bring a blush to your cheeks. “Sounds fun.” You sighed dreamily.

Edward rolled his eyes as you watched Aro leave. “You’ve actually fallen for him.” He groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Just be careful.”

“Psh. Careful is my middle name. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to get ready for that astronomy tower date.” 

Jily Headcanons

-ok so first off, some really really really bad jokes about James Fleamont Potter

-FLEAMONT

-CAN ANYONE ELSE JUST HEAR THE JOKES

-“hey James can I borrow your grey sweater?
"STOP!!!!! PETER YOU’LL GET FLEAS”
“oh shut it padfo-”
“ITS IN HIS NAME FOR PETES SAKE”
*sirius laughing BC double the pun"

-oh so many bad jokes
-especially after he transforms into an animal I mean for Christ sake James you really set yourself up for that one

-Lily finding out his middle name is Fleamont and she gets them both detention in McGonagalls

-that was the first time James Potter dared to hex Lily Evans
(The first time he could manage to hex her tbh her laughing left her defenseless)

-also Lily Evans has a loud laugh that some people may find annoying but James finds incredibly dorky and endearing

-James won’t stop stealing Remus’s books to impress Lily

-(Lily totally knows what’s happening BC she sees her notes in the books he already lent her but she lets it go because James trying to describe the books after reading summaries and the last page is hilarious)
“I mean who knew, right? You can totally kill a mockingbird, you just gotta hunt down this boo radley guy”

-Remus eventually gets frustrated when his books aren’t in order so he takes revenge

-of course Remus is friends with most of the portraits so he convinces them all to yell Fleamont at James whenever he walks by in exchange for the latest gryffindor gossip

-James can’t figure it out and he starts carrying around a bottle of hair product to fling at any portrait who dares speak the name

-when he first tells lily that she thinks he means Voldemort and is a little confused

-until they go do head duties and they start shouting “SIR!!!! SIR FLEAMONT!!”

-and then she can barely breathe she’s laughing so hard

-and his bottle of sleekeazy only lasts about 5 minutes into rounds

-it makes him super nervous and he messes up his hair a lot and then Lily starts joking she should’ve used that product on his hair and not wasted it on the portraits

-lily loves that his middle name is Fleamont bc James Potter just seems to much to be true

-this little quirk somehow makes her feel a little better BC she doesn’t feel like she has as much to live up to

-and he is happy BC she seems to be more comfortable around him huh fancy that

-James FLEAMONT Potter

2

Steve: “Didn’t I tell you to stay away from her?”

Tony: “What are you? Her bodyguard?”

Steve: “Shut up Stark, If you dare just play with her!”

You: “Stop it now!”

Tony: “(Y/N) ..”

Steve: “Tell me it’s a joke (Y/N). You’re not liking this idiot, aren’t you?”

You: “Steve shut up! Let me live my life ok? Maybe I really like him, what’s the big problem about? I can care for myself, you don’t have to play my bodyguard all the time, let me some space.”

Tony: “There you hear it.”

You: “Tony, you’re not even a little bit better! You’re always tease Steve about it, but you know that he wouldn’t support it, so stop your childish behavior. Both of you!”

Tony/Steve: “We’re sorry..”

Bang-riel

Request: Gabriel x reader rough smut. Like basically they hate each other but there is still that sexual tension. Big fight happens and then smut smut. Hope this works and is okay and thank you

A/N: This is the first time I attempted anything except Cas, Sam, and Dean but I tried so hard to make it good enough for your pretty little face. Personally I think I did ok, but I am terribly sorry if I didn’t meet your needs. Hopefully you don’t lose doubt in my writing abilities, love xx

Warnings: SMUT, language
Gabriel x Reader

“Gabriel just shut the hell up!” You were sick of the way he always had to make something about him or the way he made everything a joke. You were being nice enough because he was helping you work an angel case, but other than that he just needed to stop.

“Sorry cupcake, didn’t mean to upset that pretty face,” he said with a hint of sarcasm. You swore under your breath. You would easily beat him up if it wasn’t for him being an archangel. Sure he was kinda cute but you would still beat him up in one way or another.

Keep reading

jace duroheart: manipulates me and tries to get me to turn against my friends to the point where i cant tell right from wrong and im in a bad place because of it, says that “coe is the one of/ the only person from keeping me from dying in a fire” as if threatening suicide isnt manipulative as hell,  his apologies place blame on the people calling him out not on himself (but uwu he apologized so people should just leave him alone!!!), jokes about being a lesbophobe, has camillas boobs as his header as if thats not misogynistic as hell, his ugly 18 year old friend calls me a lying shady cunt when i call him out for manipulating me and being a nasty person, acts super condescending to all my friends soley because they’re younger than him? anyway can he shut the fuck up and stop saying that people are talking to him behind his back considering he blocked me and andie and everyone else whos tried to call him out, like how am i supposed to talk to him if he prevents me from contacting him. and having his nasty friend call me slurs isnt very encouraging either

anonymous asked:

ugh honestly just shut up already?? ur starting to get annoying with your whining about felix like it happened get over it holy shit and shut the fuck up about mark he was trying to send a positive insightful message and you say "not everybody has to respect everybody" ummm ok so why are u ridiculing felix for making jokes he APOLOGIZED FOR if he doesn't have to respect others? lol and ur not even giving him a WEEK to see if he changes his behaviour at all you expect it INSTANTLY- entitled smh🙄

( Felix has been asked to stop making horrid jokes for actual years, and yes, when you apologise you should make an effort to start changing instantly that shows that you actually meant it.
And when I say “you don’t have to respect everyone” I mean that when someone literally says shit about your way of living or who you are that encourages others to have those shitty thoughts, you don’t need to respect them. Mark made this video not saying “we need to respect each other” because ppl were being rude in the comments, no. He made that video after his friend literally insulted millions of people. And when they’re rightfully angry he’s saying “Respect him!!!” like no Felix doesn’t deserve their respect wtf. )

Insomnia is no fucking joke okay you have no idea what it’s like to be so overtired and so overstressed and still not be able to fall asleep because your mind is still going at 100 mph and yet somehow you still manage to survive each day on only a couple hours of sleep so next time you’re about to say “oh just stop thinking so much” or “it can’t be that bad” please shut the fuck up, take a seat–in fact take several seats– and educate yourself on a little thing called empathy. Just because you don’t know the struggle doesn’t mean you get to minimize and belittle it for those who do.

I’m not your punchline.

MY

ILLNESS

IS

NOT

A

JOKE

STOP.

Do you have no concept of how hurtful these “jokes” are? People love to make light of narcolepsy or crack jokes about it because “lmao it’s so funny people just fall sleep how hilarious and quirky hahahaha”.

Stop.

I see stuff like this floating around and it’s disgusting. My suffering is not your punchline. My insecurity and illness and disability is not your joke. Shut up. Shove off. I am not your punchline.

  • jungkook: /frowning/
  • bang pd nim: why are you frowning?
  • jungkook: taehyung hyung stole my ice cream last night
  • jungkook's mind: i am just tired of my own fans making me looks like i am hating on jimin hyung when in fact i love him so much but they keep talking about the times when i was 15 and super shy about skinship or when i act playful, but somehow rude in their eyes, i am just tired of it. Now i get hates because people who are not in the fandom long enough thinks that i really hates jimin hyung, that jimin hyung deserves better, they even 'hAVe bEeN wAITING FOR JIMIn TO IgnORe JunGKOoK siNCe FoREVeR AGo' why cant they just quit this joke? or at least stop wishing jimin hyung to hate me or something? i cant believe this, i am just tired and they wont shut up.
Preference: First Kiss


Steve: Steve took you on a date, the third in your series of adventures; it was to a fancy restaurant where you balked at the prices but Steve assured you it was fine. Afterwards you walked through the streets back to your place, laughing and joking with each other as naturally as if you had known each other for years. On your doorstep he stopped you from opening the door with one hand on your wrist. You turned to face him and he asked “Can I?” He didn’t need to elaborate on the question. You nodded and he leaned down to place a chaste kiss against your lips before bidding you goodnight.

Tony: He just wouldn’t shut up. He was rambling about a project of his and how you wouldn’t understand all the schematics but of course that didn’t stop him from going into detail about it. Then somehow it went from technical talk to picking on you then back to the project and then him trying to dumb it down for you. Finally you slammed a fist against the table top, drawing his attention to you. “You know something I do understand?” you said, stalking over to him as he stared at you with wide eyes. “This.” You grabbed him and pulled him into a kiss, him immediately reciprocating until you pulled away. He laughed breathlessly “Yeah, you uh, definitely understand that.”

Thor: You had just started your ‘relationship’ when he had to return to Asgard for six months. You were constantly wishing he was back and when the day finally came for his return, you met him on the roof of the Avengers tower. He had barely taken two steps when you launched yourself into his arms and kissed him with everything you had.

Clint: He had it all planned out, take you to dinner, see a movie and halfway through lean over and kiss you. He was Clint Barton though and things never went as planned. You made it through dinner, got to the theater and paid for your tickets and Clint’s phone went off. He apologized several times before running off on “Avengers business”. Two hours later he knocked on your front door with flowers and an apologetic smile, you invited him in. He stopped in the entrance hall, said, “I’m really sorry about tonight.” and leaned in to kiss you. In the process you bumped foreheads twice before you finally just put your hands on his face and held him still while you kissed him.

Natasha: Your first kiss was actually on a mission, you had been hiding in an alleyway when the people hunting you passed by and Natasha grabbed you. You had been shocked at first but quickly kissed back until both of you were sure the men were gone. “So, dinner?”

Bruce: You hadn’t felt well and Bruce had spent the entire week taking care of you until you were back to your usual self. He had just set a plate of toast and eggs down for you to eat when you stepped forward and placed a quick kiss on his lips. “Thank you.”

Bucky: You were reading in your favorite chair when Bucky walked in. He stopped immediately behind your chair and ran the fingers of his flesh hand through your hair. You leaned your head back to look up at him about to ask what he was doing when he leaned down and kissed you. It was brief and a complete surprise but when it was over you grinned, saying “Come around here an kiss me proper Barnes.”

Pietro: It was before a mission, you had suited up and were standing by the door to the Quinjet, ready to go into the fight. In the months prior you had grown close to Pietro and loved his joking attitude, now he stood across from you, tapping his foot impatiently. As soon as the door opened he took off, a silver blur. You had taken half a step when someone grabbed you and kissed you hard. Blinking you realized it was Pietro and he grinned at you. “Don’t the heroes always kiss the girl before a fight?”

anonymous asked:

Theres literally no difference between filthy frank and pewdiepie. If youre saying filthy frank knows where to stop you're just.. dumb. He's said the n word a hundred times more than felix, he jokes about suicide, abortion, disability and pretty much everything, and it's funny because everyone knows he doesnt mean it. Felix only had a couple of guys hold a sign saying kill all jews that he didnt think they would do and suddenly everyone is ready to burn him in a bonfire.

Hello, lovely…kind anonymous….I have no time for your bullshit so today i will just say Shut the fuck up and take your whiny ass to facebook this is tumblr. Don’t like something don’t say shit about it. Good bye Honey.

P.S. If you think you can come onto my blog and not expect me to snapback you are clearly mistaken.

Originally posted by kp-kaylamarie

Cringy kweer memes

ComRacist AND homophobic!

When will the lord come down and stop all kweers?

Shut up

Lol

I FOUND THE DR WHO ONE AGAIN IAFGBEGUAWFDABFEWA

Actually you’re one of them!

Congrats! You’re GNC! now shut up.

God I’m gonna gag

THIS IS

THE ONLY

FUCKING JOKE

PANSEXUALS MAKE

  • Woman: so here are my bad experiences with men that I'd like to share---
  • Anti feminists: OK I'm gonna stop you right there because it sounds like you were gonna say something not positive about men and we all know that women are 1000000x more likely to rape and murder men plus they're all pedophiles and there are 10494729203 more male victims of abuse than females so you know just stop being a misandrist... And a bitch.
  • Woman: ... But I wasn't saying --
  • Anti feminists: no no no, shut up. Remember? Only nice things about men. Or else you're a man hating bitch.
  • Feminist: can you guys stop fucking telling women to shut up about their experiences? They're allowed to speak up about these things.
  • Anti feminists: WHOA WHOA WHOA are you telling me, a man, what he can and cannot say??? You're shutting down men's voices!!!! LOL you're a hypocrite!!! *smugly sips leaf water*