just remembering the best night of my life

I remember when you loved me. When you would drive 3 hours just to see me for a few minutes on your way to practice or when you would drop off my favorite food for lunch to cheer me up on days I needed it. I remember how it felt to feel your love, feel your forehead kisses or your body next to me when I woke up. I remember running around your house, screaming with laughter or spending a night in and watching funny videos. I remember being your best friend, being the one you ran things by and wanted my approval. You wanted my input on your life and that was more than I could have ever asked for, that feeling of being wanted and needed. I remember the last time I saw you and how you reassured me the next time, I would see you for longer but that never happened.
—  this is why I won’t ever be able to trust anyone again
The Edge

When I was growing up, I always thought life was like a video game. I did everything I could to keep up the illusion: doing homework was like completing a quest, talking with friends was like navigating branching dialogue trees with NPCs, and making it to the podium at graduation was like killing the final boss.

I kept these fantasies to myself and didn’t think much of them until little details started standing out. Sometimes I’d be walking along a trail in the woods and my eyes would gravitate towards a tree that looked just a bit blurrier than the others. Other times I’d be talking with my parents and the conversation would seem off, as if their responses were just vague enough to make sense if I had said something else.

“Mrs. Bainbridge gave us way too much work tonight!” I’d argue. “Homework is important, son,” Dad would say. “There’s no way I can finish this project on top of baseball practice!” I’d yell. “Where there’s a will, there’s a way,” Dad would say.

I grew skeptical. I started testing the universe to make sure it was real. One by one, the pieces of the puzzle that I thought I had solved became detached. One afternoon, I punched my best friend Aidan straight in the teeth. His face recoiled a bit, but then snapped back into place, his big smile unfazed.

“Want to play Smash later?” Aidan said immediately after, grinning from ear to ear.

The next day, I tried to get my parents to say my name.

“Come down for dinner, honey!” Mom called. “How was your day, sport?” Dad asked. “Elbows off the table, dear,” Mom said.

This went on for the rest of the night. I couldn’t remember the last time my parents ever said my name.

Looking back on it, I should have just accepted it. It wasn’t hard to live my life as the game intended. I could have been happy if I had drowned out all the red flags. It’s too late for that now.

Yesterday, or at least I think it was yesterday, I decided to push the game to its limits. Right before school I stole my mom’s keys, got in her truck, and drove. It didn’t matter where I was going, so long as it was somewhere new.

Eventually, the road got less familiar. I was entering the wilderness. In a half-hour, I had reached the city limits, beyond the thick canopy of trees that isolated our town from the outside world.

Except…there was nothing. The road ended there. The land just stopped. Everything was blue. Up, down, and out into the endless expanse. It was all blue.

I stood there on the precipice, wondering what my life had been up until that moment. I wondered what it could be. I took my first step into the blue unknown. I started to fall.

In those final seconds, the scariest thing I could imagine was living a life that someone else had chosen for me.

But now?

I’m still falling.

Life Was a Song, You Came Along
by rainbowninja167


It’s embarrassing how long it takes Louis to recognize his own song. Niall had sung it as a bright, hopeful love song, and that’s honestly how Louis had always assumed it should sound. But this new voice, slow and rough, stripped of any backing instrument, has infused the lyrics with just the tumultuous mix of fear and defiance that Louis can remember so clearly from the night he wrote them.

It’s not a comfortable thing, to feel like someone is singing all your secrets back to you.

Louis is a songwriter trapped in a lie that could ruin his best friend’s career. Harry owns a record store, distrusts everyone in the music industry on principle, but loves Niall Horan’s newest album. A modern retelling of Singin’ in the Rain.

New Writing Prompts

I’ve made a new prompt list because even though I have four other lists, people keep sending in the same five or six prompts for different couples so here’s hoping this will add some variety. I know this list is hella long right now but I will delete prompts from it as requests come in. :)

  • “Stop what you’re doing!”
  • “Maybe if you listened, I wouldn’t have to keep telling you.”
  • “None of this was my doing, nor did I think any of it was okay.”
  • “Just sit still for a few minutes.”
  • “I don’t need you anymore.”
  • "You put us both in danger.”
  • "I don’t understand you.”
  • "This is gonna hurt.”
  • "Can you slow down?”
  • "I can’t believe you would do this.”
  • “Don’t underestimate me. I’m a seasoned pro.”
  • “I can’t talk about this anymore.”
  • "I don’t really care what you think.”
  • "I can’t do that.”
  • "This is a train wreck.”
  • "You’re still gonna go, aren’t you?”
  • "I’ve never felt anything like that.”
  • “This is completely different.”
  • "I went easy on you.”
  • “Look, I let you stay on my couch and eat my food, but this is going a bit far, don’t you think?”
  • “Do you see the extreme disappointment on my face? It’s all for you.”
  • “We’re not lost; I just decided to take the scenic route.”
  • "Hand over the last piece of cake and you won’t get hurt.”
  • "What do you mean the house is on fire?!”
  • "Are you following me?”
  • "Is this hell?”
  • "How are we getting out of this one?”
  • “If you say that one more time, you’ll hope for death.”
  • “No, no, your hair looks…unique. It’s okay, I’m sure we can fix it.”
  • “It’s just a frog, why are you so scared?”
  • “Trust me, I know exactly what I’m doing. Mostly.”
  • “This isn’t going to become a thing, is it?”
  • "Why am I the one who always has to be the grown up?”
  • “Not going to lie to you, we’re all going to die. But not today.”
  • “These are my absolute favorite pajamas!” 
  • “You’re lucky to be alive right now.”
  • “Wait, wait, how many did you say there were?“
  • “Do you think you could teach me?” 
  • “Just because you saved my life doesn’t mean I owe you anything!” 
  • “How do you live like this?”
  • “Really, you’re going to judge me for this?”
  • “What could go wrong?”
  • “You promised you wouldn’t laugh!”
  • “I know it’s technically not a big deal, but i will totally fight you over this.”
  • “I didn’t push you…the wind pushed you. ”
  • “I totally called it, but no one listened!” 
  • “But you have to remember!”
  • “Can I tell you about a dream I had?”
  • “Well, if that’s really what you want.”
  • “I’m going to give you the best night of your life.”
  • “So I bet you’re all wondering how I’m still alive.”
  • “No way,  that’s also my favorite!”  
  • "No matter what, I want you to know that I’m proud of you.”
  • “Listen, I really don’t like you, but you have kittens so I’m going to be over a lot.”
  • “You locked yourself out too?”
  • “I don’t mean to sound paranoid but I’m pretty sure you’re a serial killer.”
  • “I see you there all the time.”
  • “Here, let me show you how to do it.”
  • “That’s not a good sign.”
  • “Stop shooting at me! I’m innocent!”
  • “How long have you been standing there?”
  • “I had to see you again.”
  • “I missed you.”
  • “Are you jealous?”
  • “What are you afraid of?”
  • “Do you trust me?”
  • “You weren’t supposed to hear that.”
  • “It’s not nearly as bad as it looks.”
  • “Come over here and make me.”
  • “Your hair’s all messed up. Let me fix it.”
  • “I can’t sleep.”
  • “Go then; leave! See if I care!”
  • “I’m not going to change. You’ll have to deal with it.”
  • “Are you serious? Do you have to do this now?”
  • “Do you think we’re bad people?”
  • “Just smile, I really need to see you smile right now.”
  • “Stop interrupting me!”
  • “Give me a chance.”
  • “I came to say goodbye.”
  • “I’m so in love with you.”
  • “Isn’t this amazing?”
  • “Catch me if you can!”
  • “You owe me.”
  • “It’s just your imagination.”
  • “I can take care of myself just fine.”
  • “Since when have we ever been friends?”
  • “We’re not just friends and you know it.”
  • “Just shut up and kiss me.”
  • “If we get caught, I’m blaming you.”
  • “How long do we have?”
  • “Am I ever going to see you again?”
  • “You make me feel invincible.”
  • ”Love isn’t perfect and that’s okay.”
  • “Are you ever going to tell him?”
  • “I didn’t mean what I said.”
  • “Don’t look at me like that.”
  • “What do you mean you love me?”
  • “I need a place to stay.”
  • “Good thing I didn’t ask for your opinion.”
  • “Leave me alone.”
  • “I never meant to hurt you.”
  • “You need to leave.”
  • “I wish I’d never met you.”
  • “I can’t stand the thought of losing you.”
  • “Don’t touch me.”
  • “Not sure if you could tell, but I’m not exactly a people person.”
  • “I hate how much I love you.”
  • “That’s starting to get annoying.”
  • “I’ll keep you safe.”
  • “How did you find me?”
  • “I don’t want to talk about it.”
  • “I don’t want to feel like this tomorrow.”
  • “Are you kidding me?! We’re not fine!”
  • “You can’t just sit there all day.”
  • “I’ve liked you for a while now.”
  • “Don’t argue. Just do it.”
  • “Wait a second. Are you jealous?”
  • “I wasn’t going to wait around forever.”
  • “This is all my fault.”
  • “You deserve better than me.”
  • “Could you be happy here, with me?”
  • “Do you wish things had happened differently?”
Free Styling 101: Unexpected Suggestions for Where You Should Go and How You Should Dress if You’ve Never Free Styled Before

     We’ve done it, best friend. We have agreed that free styling is the way to go. But if you are anything like me, you’ve known that there was a good argument to free style. You’ve read the posts that say to put on the best clothes you have and to just go out there and do it. Men will knock you over if you just dress up and go to the best bar in town. If you’re anything like me, you read each of those posts and then hopped right back on SA after rolling your eyes. Go free style they say. But there has to be so much more to it right?

     There isn’t. Now, wait a minute. Don’t roll your eyes at me. I don’t like those posts that feel like they’re just trying to throw us to the wolves, but there are some things that they got right. The most important one? 

To learn how to do anything, you’ve got to get out there and do it. 

     Duh. Simple but challenging advice. I’m going to suggest that you free style in a new way. But before we address the new way of doing things, let’s address the problem. Why don’t we free style?

     I think the problem can be answered with one simple phrase: fear of the unknown. That’s silly. One of two things will happen. You’ll meet someone and exchange numbers or you won’t. But let’s get specific. I think we always wonder where we should go, what we should wear, and how we should act. 

Where should you go the first time you free style? Some place you’re already familiar with. 

     Odd advice, I know. But have you ever gone to a restaurant or bar or where ever and been so uncomfortable and felt so out of place that the only thing you could think about was how long it was going to take for someone to recognize you were a fraud and kick you out? How good were you at freestyling that night? 

     Go where you’re comfortable. I don’t care if it’s a local dive bar or college hang out or it’s TGIFridays. Actually, I’d love it if you did go to the TGIFridays in the sort of suburban kind of affluent part of your city. The most interesting people hang out there. 

    Why should you go to a familiar place? Because then you won’t have to stress about what to wear, who will be there, what you should order, how you should behave. You’ve been to this place dozens of times. There’s nothing to think about. Nothing to be nervous about. You can go in with confidence. 

What should you wear? Well, that’s the beauty of starting in your comfort zone. 

What do you usually wear to this place? I don’t care what you wear as long as it’s not ratty sweats and a tee, but even that’s a lie. You can make ratty sweats and a tee super cute with the right accessories. At least, that’s what I tell myself when I leave the house in them. The most important things are your hair and makeup. But Shea, I’m not good at doing my hair or makeup, you say. Well, best friend, that’s why the ancestors helped us create YouTube. The trick is to master the basics. Learn how to apply foundation, put on blush, and maybe some lipstick if you’re feeling fancy. Learn a 20-minute hairstyle that you can’t possibly mess up. The less you do, the less likely you are to look crazy. 

                                         How should you act?

Like yourself. I could point you towards the women who have taken the time to write, in great detail, what you should say to a man that approaches you. But I have several problems with these scripts. The first is these scripts work for them, but you aren’t them. The second is what if the unsuspecting man deviates from the script (which he will)? What will you do when the training wheels are off? What will you do if, in your nervousness, you forget what you’re supposed to say (you will forget)? The third and most important is that pretending to be anyone besides the gorgeous person you are is both an insult to yourself and a supreme waste of your time. Don’t do it. Be you. It is exhausting to be anyone else and will make you look stilted and awkward. Be you. Everyone else is taken. 

             What do you do if a man approaches you?

Unless he’s chocolate wasted or belligerent, you talk to him. He’ll say something to start the conversation. You’ll say something back to keep it going (can’t think of anything to say? check this out) and a conversation will begin. Do you need to be attracted to him? Does he need to be rich? Does he need to be SD potential? No. No. And no. This is target practice best friend. We are not at all invested in whether you meet your SD in a dive bar. In fact, we are already positive that it won’t happen. The point is to sharpen your skills, to get you used to going out with the sole intention of attracting and maintaining the attention of men for as long as you desire. If he approaches, talk to him. You’ll find out what he does for a living. He’ll discover the same about you. Blahblahblah. You get ready to leave. You give the man your sugar phone number.

                                                  Then what?

Then you text him. For a week. Some of you have started pouting. Best friend, I’m sorry. I know some Tumblr blog told you that you’re supposed to be making money on every date you go on every single time you leave your house. I used to think that too, pumpkin. I want you to leave that idea alone. I want you to remember that you’ve had training for every job you’ve ever done and it’s the reason why you could do that job with confidence. This is training. You have one week to get this man to ask you to dinner at a restaurant that you find acceptable given his income (which you should have googled. He did give you his occupation). If you can’t accomplish that, dump him and get back in the bars and find another victim to practice on. If he does agree to dinner in an appropriate location, remember that post on figuring out if he’s cheap? Time to practice that too. At the end of the date, you should know if he’s a cheap or not. 

     What do you do with them when the date is over? That’s up to you. If you like him but still want to sugar you have two options. Keep dating him but don’t let it get so pressing that you lose sight of your sugaring goals. Or you can dump him and move on to the next victim (if you get caught up in love and relationships and feelings easily then this is how you want to go). Tell him you had an amazing time but you don’t think the two of you are the best fit for each other. Done. On to the next.

            What do you do if no one approaches you?

This may happen. The first time I free styled I sat at the bar and realized it was couples night. Great. I had two options. I could wallow in my sorrows, and my gin and tonic or I could pick my ass up and go somewhere else. I chose option two and met a very nice man whose family owned a local snack company. But there’s a chance that you’ll go to location two and no one will talk to you there either. There’s a chance. So you go home, and you restrategize. You figure out if it was you. Were you on your phone all night avoiding eye contact? Did you make eye contact and then quickly drop it thinking this made you look coy and cute (it doesn’t. if you make eye contact hold it for at least five seconds before looking away)? You figure out if it was the location or just an off night. These will happen. You’ll have a lot of them. I hope you have a lot of them. They will be how you learn. They will show you how badly you want this life or if you want it at all. I hope no one approaches you at first. If you give up at the first obstacle, you don’t deserve to win. It sounds mean, best friend, I know. But failure has been my best teacher. It has shown me what I really want and what I really like to talk about. Besides, this is just training remember? We didn’t expect to meet our future SD in TGIFridays.

Best friend, what do you think? Is this a free styling plan that you can get behind until you build your confidence or have I lost my natural mind? Tell me your thoughts and your plans. Let’s talk!

Within Temptation starters (1/2)

enter  (1997)

  • ❛ all my love, i gave to you. ❜
  • ❛ lift me up from here. ❜ 
  • ❛ i forgot where i came from. ❜ 
  • ❛ one by one, they died. ❜
  • ❛ they had no chance. ❜
  • ❛ you can’t kill what has been killed before. ❜
  • ❛ i’ll never help you through. ❜

mother earth  (2000) 

  • ❛ i find my strength in believing that your soul lives on. ❜ 
  • ❛ a new beginning always starts at the end. ❜
  • ❛ you better keep moving. ❜
  • ❛ you better hide before she finds you. ❜
  • ❛ haven’t you seen the ruins of our world? ❜
  • ❛ i can almost see your smile, the warmth of your embrace. ❜
  • ❛ there is nothing but silence now. ❜
  • ❛ is this our farewell? ❜
  • ❛ sweet darling, you worry too much. ❜
  • ❛ you are not alone in life, though you might think you are. ❜
  • ❛ never thought this day would come so soon. ❜
  • ❛ we had no time to say goodbye. ❜
  • ❛ how can the world just carry on? ❜
  • ❛ i feel so lost when you’re not at my side. ❜
  • ❛ i’ll watch you through these nights. rest your head and go to sleep. ❜
  • ❛ everyone with a friendly face seems to hide some secret inside. ❜
  • ❛ he told me he loved me while he laughed in my face. ❜
  • ❛ i feel so cold inside. ❜
  • ❛ you promised to return to me, and i believed. ❜
  • ❛ i’ll make them bleed down at my feet. ❜
  • ❛ there’s always a sparkle of hope if you just believe. ❜
  • ❛ remember who you are, what you stand for. ❜
  • ❛ don’t you die on me. ❜

the silent force  (2004) 

  • ❛ it’s the best way of living, between the truth and the lies. ❜ 
  • ❛ this is not the end. ❜
  • ❛ our dream ended long ago. ❜
  • ❛ we won’t be together forever and ever. ❜
  • ❛ late at night, things i thought i put behind me haunt my mind. ❜
  • ❛ no more denying.  i’ve gotta face it. ❜
  • ❛ it’s time for me to face it… but can i take it? ❜
  • ❛ this might just be the ending of the life i held so dear. ❜
  • ❛ there’s no turning back from here. ❜
  • ❛ i have to fight, ‘cause i know, in the end, it’s worthwhile. ❜
  • ❛ i have no strength to go on. ❜
  • ❛ you’re the reason i have to stay. ❜
  • ❛ you were my savior in my time of need. ❜
  • ❛ there’s no escape now.  no mercy.  no more. ❜
  • ❛ i still remember the smile when you tore me apart. ❜
  • ❛ you took my heart, deceived me right from the start. ❜
  • ❛ it was all just a lie. ❜
  • ❛ the memories ease the pain inside. ❜
  • ❛ all of my memories keep you near. ❜
  • ❛ you know i’ll love you ‘til the end of time. ❜
  • ❛ you made me feel alive. ❜
  • ❛ i need to be with you again. ❜
  • ❛ i fear who i am becoming. ❜
  • ❛ i’ll keep on trying until my dying day. ❜
  • ❛ wherever you are, i won’t stop searching. ❜
  • ❛ i’m longing to see you again.  it’s been so long. ❜
  • ❛ i did my best to please you, but my best was never good enough. ❜
  • ❛ i have failed you, but you have failed me, too. ❜
  • ❛ do you ever wonder if it’s justified? ❜

anonymous asked:

17&72 with yoongs? full on angst please 😊



I woke up startled. The rain drizzled down and hit the window creating a constant beating sound. I opened my eyes slowly to see the gloomy scene outside the window. I examine the room around me and see that I’m not home. I turn to my side and see Yoongi lying face down on my bed. I look down at myself and see that I’m no longer wearing the black jumper i was wearing last night. Oh God. I’m in his clothes. That’s all I need to piece the rest of the story together. 

I squirm away from Yoongi with a start. He being to stir and i just look at his shirtless upper body feeling queazy inside. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Not like this. I can barely remember last night over the throbbing headache and nausea I’m experiencing. I rmeber coming over here after Yoongi called me. He was upset. About what? What was he mad about- Oh. His girlfriend broke up with him and I being his best friend was the first person he called to be his drinking buddy. 

I start vaguely remember confessing my feelings for him after we downed countless bottles. Looking back over at Yoongi I figure this is where things led. But this isn’t what I wanted. I want him but not as his rebound. Rebound. That’s probably all I am to him now. 

I feel tears on y cheek which let’s me know I’m crying and then the sobs follow. I don’t even care if he sees me cry, he’s seen way more.

“Y/N? What- why are yo crying? What’s going on?”

I look over at him through my teary eys and he sits up in bed. I gesture to his shirtless body. “I’m sorry,” I say, wiping a tear and crossing my legs on the end of his bed. “For what?” He’s sittind up striaght now, his back leaning aganist the bedframe. “For last night. I was drunk. I don’t remember much but I know I said somethings that yo can just disregard. ANd we did some things that we can just disregard too.” I muimble that last part and get up off the bed. “I’ll return the clothes to you tommorow.” I say over my shoulder, walking out of the bedroom door.

“Wait!” Yoongi calls from behind me. Yoongi grabs my hand turn me around to face him. “Y/N,” he chuckles. “Yo u may not remeber what happened last night but I do. I told you that you are the best perosn in my life and then you told me you were in love with me. And then after that you proceeded to throw up all over yourself and me being the gentle man I am, offered to clean you off.”

“Oh.” I say. “So nothing happened.”

“Gosh no!” He laughs. Ouch.

He sees the hurt on my face and immediately backpeddles. “No that’s not what i meant. I mean, Y/N, you’re my bestfirend.”

So I guess I’m not a rebound but I am still in the friendzone. I nod my head along. 

“You’re my best firend too Yoongi. But I don’t think I can be anymore.” 

“What are you talking about?” 

I pushed his hand away form me and back away, moving to put my shoes on.

“Yoongi you don’t understand how hard it is to be your friend.”

“What? Last night you were telling me how long you’ve had feeling for me and now you’re saying this? You’re not making any sense.”

“Yoongi I love you!” I say dropping my shoe forcefully to the ground. “It’s hard because I have these feeling that you will never be able to feel for me. It’s hard because I have to struggle to find a date whenever that stupid bitch wanted to have double date nights!”

“DON’T CALL HER A BITCH!” Yoongi booms and I scoff. “Wow. She cheats on you and you yell at me defending her?” I sigh, putting my hand on the doorknob.

“Y/N- Wait, please.” Yoongi starts. “No Yoongs. I have waited. A long time for a day where you could see me the way I see you. I love you but I can’t do this anymore.”

“Y/N please.” Yoongi moves towards me but I swiftly opened the door and slam it shut behind me. I wait there with my back against the cool door for Yoongi to come out and fight for me but he doesn’t. I walk towards the elevators and press the button. When the door opens Yoongi’s ex is standing there. She looks me up and down. We make eye contact but don’t say a word. We switch places, her walking out to Yoongi’s apartment, and me getting in and going down the elevator away from Yoongi.


Hello! I don’t think my angst game was strong today but I tried :) Hope you liked reading this! Let me know if you did:) Also, completely unrelated, but does anyone here watch Kdramas? I’m watching Strong Woman Do Bong Soon right now and it’s GOLD. It gives me so many feels no joke. Please tell me if you can relate.


That's My Boy

I love your writing!! Could you write a Shawn imagine where he’s been ill all morning & day but he doesn’t want to let his fans down and cancel a show but he’s been getting worse all day & doesn’t think he can last through a whole show?? Maybe he gets really upset before the concert because he starts feeling really sick to his stomach & you think it’s partially nerves because he doesn’t want to ruin anything? Thanks!!

Oh my god I’ve been waiting for a request like this for such a long time! Anyway, I’m still trying to get out of the funk of writers block and get back on the saddle (god I sound like an old person) but, I hope you enjoy this one! ❤


‘Alright, looks like we’re almost set for Shawn’s concert tonight, everything looks great.’ Andrew sighed in content, giving me a high five. I admired Andrew on how proud he was of Shawn and how far he had come. It made me happy to see Shawn pulling off huge crowds like this.

'I seriously love this set up though. You guys always out do yourselves.’ I smiled, staring at the full circled moon that was hanging in the middle of the room.

'It’s all Shawn’s ideas, we just make it happen. Speaking of Shawn, where is he?’ Andrew asked, looking around.

'I let him sleep in a little longer, he seemed knackered last night after the concert. I’ll go get him, best me do it.’ I chuckled, remembering the last time someone else tried to do it, never seen the boy so angry in his life.

'I think that’s a good idea.’ Andrew chuckled, patting my back. I smiled again, before walking out of the venue towards the tour bus.

I noticed James walking towards me, smiling ear to ear. 'Hey Y/N, how you going today?’

'I’m alright, I have to go wake up his royal highness so wish me luck.’ I chuckled, looking back to the tour bus.

'Good luck, I’ll see you later.’ He smiled. I waved bye to him, finally reaching the tour bus. I opened the door, walking up the steps to see Shawn’s bunk curtain still closed.

I walked over slowly to him, pushing open his curtain quietly to see his sleeping face. I smiled at the sight, lifting my hand up to run my fingers through his soft curls. He moved a little, before slowly opening his eyes. He grabbed my hand, holding it in his whilst I rested my chin on his bed.

'Hey sunshine, you’ve got to get up now.’ I whispered.

'What’s the time?’ He asked, his voice sounding croaky. I frowned, a little worried. I know he had a morning voice, but something seemed off.

'It’s 11:00. I let you sleep in because you seemed tired from the night before.’ I answered, kissing our intwined hands. 'Don’t worry, Andrew said it was okay. Besides, I think James is rehearsing.’

'No, I-I gotta get up.’ I backed up a little, letting him get out of his bunk. He slowly rocked a little, leaning his back against the bunks.

'Shawn, are you alright?’ I asked, stepping forward. I placed my hands gently on his face, studying him. Something was definitely off.

'Yeah, I’m just tired that’s all.’ He gave me a half hearted smile, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him.

'Are you sure? You look a little pale…’ I sighed, wrapping my own arms around him. He leaned down, kissing my forehead for reassurance.

'I promise I’m okay, really.’ I sighed, his stubbornness always powering over mine. Damn him.

'Alright, well take a shower and get freshened up. You’ve got a big night tonight.’ I smiled, pecking his lips. 'I’ll make you some tea and breaky if you want?’ I went to walk away, before Shawn pulled me in again, kissing my lips once more. I chuckled, feeling him pull away. I pushed him towards the bathroom, turning on the kettle.

I smiled, feeling lucky to be on this journey with Shawn, he was the most hard working musician I’d seen to date. He was always working, on stage and off, I’m still surprised he managed to graduate sometimes. I was absentmindedly scrolling through Twitter, looking at edits of Shawn and fans tagging me in posts when I heard a thud come from the bathroom.

I placed my phone down and ran to the bathroom. I knocked on the door, waiting to hear a response, hearing nothing.

'Shawn? Sweetheart? Are you okay?’ I asked hurriedly, hearing no response.

I opened the door, seeing him past out on the floor of the shower, steam filling up everywhere. 'Shit! Shawn!’ I exclaimed, opening the shower door and turning on the cold water. I didn’t care if my clothes got wet, but now I was seriously worried.

I flicked cold water on his face, seeing his eyes slowly drooping open. He looked up and around, trying to familiarise himself with his surroundings.

'Y/N? Wha-what happened?’ He asked. I switched off the water, moving his hair from his eyes, staring into his eyes.

'You must’ve passed out from the heat. Shawn, you don’t look well at all.’ I sighed, seeing his face pale.

'I’ll be okay, I promise.’ He mumbled, trying to stand up. I stopped him, kissing his forehead.

'Stop lying. Wait here, I’ll get you some clothes.’ I whispered, running out of the bathroom, straight to his suitcase, grabbing a shirt, hoodie, underwear and sweatpants. I walked back in, placing the clothes down and grabbing a towel, starting to dry him.

'Is this your way of turning me on?’ He joked whilst I dried the lower part of his body, I rolled my eyes and shook my head at him, smiling.

'You wish, Shawn Mendes.’ I replied. 'C'mon - help me, help you.’ I wrapped his arm over my shoulder, mine around his waist to help him up.

'Y/N, I can get changed on my own.’ He kissed my forehead, whilst i quickly put down the toilet seat, sitting him down on it.

'Hush up and put on your briefs.’ I threw him his underwear. He rolled his eyes, slipping them on with the rest of his clothes.

'Shawn, I don’t think you should perform tonight.’ I spoke up honestly. He looked at me like I had said the most offensive thing ever. I threw my hands up in defence. 'You passed out in the shower!’

'I’m just tired, alright? I’ll rehearse for a bit, sleep and I’ll be right. Just - please don’t tell Andrew or Geoff, I need you do this for me.’ He sighed, running his fingers through his still wet hair. I stood in front of him, placing my hands on face. He was burning up and I wanted him to lay and rest, but knowing him, he didn’t want to disappoint anyone, especially his fans.

'I hate it when you guilt trip me. I’ll shut up, but, if you’re not feeling well, tell me straight away. If you’re not better four hours before, I’m telling Andrew.’ I compromised, pecking his lips. I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him, feeling his strong arms wrap around me.

'I love you.’ He whispered in my ear. I felt the corners of my mouth lift up, making me smile.

'I love you too.’


It had been a few hours and Shawn had been rehearsing non stop. I had to force him to take a break, in which he took a nap in his dressing room for half an hour. He wasn’t getting any better, in fact, he was getting worse.

'Y/N!’ I peeked my head up from the front row, seeing Geoff on stage as he motioned me over, making my nerves worsen. I slowly made my way up the stage steps, standing in front of Geoff.

'What’s up?’ I asked.

'Is Shawn okay? He’s seemed off all day. Is there something I should know?’ He asked.

I shook my head, feeling guilty for lying to him. 'I’m not sure, he hasn’t really talked to me.’ I shrugged.

Geoff sighed. 'I’m really worried because he has meet & greet soon and I don’t want him to go out and do this if he isn’t well.’

I sighed, biting my lip to stop the truth coming out. 'You’ll have to talk to him, I doubt he’ll tell me anything.’

He nodded giving me a side hug before walking away. I sighed, looking out to the arena from the stage. This venue was soon going to be filled with fans, I just hope they’ll be able to see Shawn.


I don’t know how he did it, but Shawn managed to meet over 100 fans through meet and greet. He looked so ill it made me feel like crap looking at him. Fans asked him apparently if he was okay and he replied that he was.

He laid on the couch in his dressing room, his eyes closed. I sat on the floor next to him, laying my head on it to look at him. He looked peaceful but exhausted at the same time. I sighed, hearing a knock at the door. It opened to reveal James, frowning a little at the state of Shawn.

'Is he okay?’ He whispered, closing the door behind him.

I shook my head, staring back at my sleeping boyfriend. 'I promised not to say but he really wants to perform. He has the next two days off but, I feel bad for him that he pushes himself too hard.’ I whispered.

'What can we do?’

I shrugged. 'I don’t know. He isn’t better and I hate to say it, but, he won’t be able to perform.’

Shawn moved suddenly, waking up and staring at James and I. 'What’s up?’ He croaked out.

'Dude, you look horrible.’ James sighed, sitting in the other chair across from him.

'Thanks.’ Shawn replied, sarcasm evident in his voice. 'I’ll be fine though guys, please stop worrying.’

I closed my eyes and looked down at my lap, completely worried about him. I didn’t know how he was going to do this.


It was an hour or so in and James played a few extra songs to give Shawn some time to gain some strength to perform. I stood side of stage with him, helping him out his electric guitar on.

He sighed, looking at me. 'I want to do this, Y/N, please don’t be mad.’ He whispered, looking down at me.

I lifted my gaze up to look at him, no smile or nothing shown on my face. 'I’m not mad, Shawn. I’m worried.’

He moved his guitar around, hugging me tightly. 'I’ll be okay.’ He reassured.

'Are you reassuring me or yourself?’ I asked. Before Shawn could answer, Geoff called him over, telling him to get ready to go on.

Shawn sighed, before looking down, covering his face with his hands. I notice his shoulders shaking, hearing his quite sobs coming through.

'Where does it hurt?’ I asked.

'It hurts everywhere.’ He sobbed. Luckily the side of stage was dark so no one could see him.

'Where specifically?’ I asked, placing my hands on his biceps.

He pointed to his chest and throat. I knew exactly what it was, it was anxiety. He was feeling scared, which was understandable.

'Shawn, hey,’ I murmured, hugging him. 'If you can’t do this, don’t. But, if you want to fight through and give the best of your ability, do it. I support you with any decision you want.’ I removed his hand from his face, staring at his tear stricken face. I bent his head down, kissing his forehead. 'Do what you want, hun. I support you.’

He nodded, looking a little better, staring at the side of the stage, everything becoming dark, his intro to his concert starting.

'You’ve got this.’ I whispered in his ear, kissing his cheek, before he walked to the side of stage, his nerves slipping away with every step.

That’s my boy.

Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind Starters
  • ❝I don’t need nice.❞
  • ❝Constantly talking isn’t necessarily communicating.❞
  • ❝I’m gonna marry you. I know it.❞
  • ❝Too many people think I’m a concept, or I complete them.❞
  • ❝I can’t see anything I don’t like about you.❞
  • ❝My crotch is still here, just as you remembered it.❞
  • ❝Remember me. Try your best.❞
  • ❝You looked happy. Happy with a secret.❞
  • ❝Sand is overrated. It’s just tiny little rocks.❞
  • ❝I can’t believe I’m crying already.❞
  • ❝I’m erasing you and I’m happy.❞
  • ❝I had the best fucking night of my fucking life last night!❞
  • ❝I could die right now. I’m just so…happy. I’m exactly where I wanna be.❞
  • ❝What a loss, to spend so much time with someone only to find out they’re a stranger.❞
  • ❝Today is a holiday invented by greeting card companies to make people feel like crap.❞
  • ❝Why do I fall in love with every woman I see who shows me the least bit of attention?❞
  • ❝Why do you leave everyone? Why did you let me go?❞
  • ❝You know me. I’m impulsive.❞
  • ❝Maybe you can find yourself a nice antique rocking chair to die in!❞
  • ❝You look at a baby and it’s so pure and so free and so clean. And adults are like, this mess of sadness and phobias.❞
  • ❝Can I – borrow a piece of your chicken?❞
  • ❝I’m just a fucked up girl/boy who’s looking for my own peace of mind.❞
  • ❝We met at the wrong time.❞
  • ❝I’d like to, um…take you out or something.❞
  • ❝Come back and make up a goodbye at least, pretend we had one!❞
  • ❝By morning, you’ll be gone.❞
  • ❝I’m always anxious thinking I’m not living my life to the fullest..❞
  • ❝I can’t remember anything without you.❞
  • ❝Sometimes I think people forget how lonely it is to be a kid, like you don’t matter.❞
The Hardest Goodbye

Request: ‘You should write a reggie x reader where they’re dating and Reggie has to leave riverdale for good because of school or something and its really sad, like a homage to Ross Butler. Make me cry’ 

Pairing: Reggie x Reader

Warnings: none, this is the fluffiest shit I’ve ever written

Word count: 3316

A/N: I really tried with this one, I knew I needed to write this as soon as I got the request. P.S Ross Butler will always be the best Reggie Mantle

Originally posted by meu-papel-de-carta

(also before y’all come for me I know this gif’s from 13 rw, but I thought it was cute ok)

I awoke this morning feeling as grey as the cloud covered sky outside my window. The day had finally arrived, the day I’d been dreading for weeks. It was the day Reggie Mantle would be moving away from Riverdale, for good. 

It was exactly 1 month and 3 days ago when he told me he’d been offered a place at a prestigious football based school. I was over the moon for him, I remember feeling so proud. My boyfriend was going to be a famous athlete.

 That was until he told me that this school happened to be halfway across the country. Then the pride was replaced with a feeling of nausea, and it had stuck with me every day since.

I tried my best to be supportive and not let him know that with every passing day my heart broke a little more, I became an expert at putting up a front. I did this because I could tell how much he really wanted to go by the way his eyes would light up each and every time he spoke about it. Sometimes I’d slip up with my facade and he’d always be able to tell. “Don’t worry Y/N, we’ll skype every day and I’ll come visit you. I promise”. He would say over and over again. I’d always just nod and smile and pretend that this would be enough.

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okay so one studyblr concept that has always bugged me is the idea that people who get better grades than you = smarter/worked harder than you??? because its a complete fucking lie. i know this one girl in my class who’s ranked number 6 and she hasn’t studied a day in her life - all she does is figure out new ways to cheat. and going to school with that mindset imo is so negative? like imagine you worked your ass off every night to get a good grade in a class you struggle just to get back a C whereas someone who doesn’t work have half your work ethnic continuously get A’s in that class. In your perspective its because they outworked you which again is false. Just remember that the best person you can compare yourself to is yourself because comparison to others can easily get unhealthy and unrealistic

Drunk In Love // Damon Salvatore // Requested

Request : Could I get a Damon imagine where the reader is a witch and best friends with Damon, and he secretly likes the reader. So when they get drunk they sleep together (if u wanna right that in or not, up to u) and when they wake up Damon is scared she might regret it but she loves him too 😶🤗

Requests Are Open xx

Originally posted by the-vampire-diaries-gif

Originally posted by caughtinyourhipster

Damon sat impatiently at the bar. He turned his head to see Y/N walking in. Her eyes scanned the room until they met his. A smile took over her features as she walked towards him.

“Hey! Sorry I’m late. Ever since Bonnie lost her powers I’m kinda the go to witch now.” I let out a small laugh, sitting next to him.

“It’s all good as long as you clear your schedule for the night. I miss my witchy drinking buddy.” He smirked, ordering a round of shots.

“Is that Damon Salvatore actually caring about someone other than himself?” I spoke sarcastically.

“Tell anyone and I’ll have to kill you. Cheers.” Damon responded, holding up a shot.

I clinked our glass together before downing it, letting the foul liquid slide down my throat. “Woo! Another one!” I cheered.

Hours later we were finally walking back to the Salvatore house. For more drinks, of course.

“Hey.. Hey, buddy. I gotta question.” I slurred, holding onto Damons arm so I didn’t trip.

“Shoot.” He responded simply.

I could tell that he was drunk, just probably not as much as I am.

“How much does it take for vampires to get drunk? Like do you guys need a full keg to feel something?”

Damon laughed, “depends. Although, I’m not one for kegs.”

“Oh, yeah. You’re a scotch man.” I snorted, “that would suck. To build up a tolerance.. I love being a light weight. Okay, okay. I have another question.”

Damon rolled his eyes and a smirk played at his lips. I stopped walking and took off my heels.

“Why are we walking? You’re a vampire. I can get on your back and you can fly us outta here like in Twilight.”

He groaned, “alright, come on spider monkey.” He spoke, quoting the movie.

I squealed and jumped onto his back. “I knew you watched that movie!”

“Yeah and it was terrible. Total waste of two hours.” 

I sighed and leaned my head on his back.

“Jasper was so pretty.” I whispered, closing my eyes.

“Wasn’t he the dog?” Damon asked, confused. I let out a laugh and opened my eyes to see that we were already inside the Salvatore house.

“Holy shit.” I laughed, jumping off of his back. “And no, he was a vampire. He was a cowboy. That might be why I like him.”

Damon rolled his eyes, “I’ll get the scotch, you get the music.”

I waved my hand towards the fireplace and watched as it went up in flames. I ran towards the sound system and connected my phone, rock music began to fill the large house.

“Where’s Stefan?” I asked as Damon came into the room holding two glass bottles. He shrugged and handed me a bottle. “Probably with Elena.”

I grinned and turned up the music, taking a large gulp of whatever alcohol he handed me and tossing my jacket to the side.

“Now, Mr. Salvatore. Show me how you guys danced back in the 1800s.” I giggled holding out my hand.

“Oh god no. I’m not drunk enough for that.” He laughed.

“Pleaseee, for me. I’m already drunk so if it makes you feel any better I won’t remember this tomorrow.” I pouted.

“Okay. Okay. This isn’t even the right music.” He complained.

“We’ll make it the right music now come on.” I grinned, pulling him towards me. “Okay, so does my hand go here?” I continued, placing my hand on his shoulder.

“Yeah, and the other one goes in my hand.” He responded, defeated. I grinned as his hand found my waist and he began leading me in the steps.

We began floating around the room and I laughed. I looked into his eyes and arched an eyebrow. “Is this how you got all the girls back then? You just showed them your classy dance moves.”

He smirked, “Duh. No one could resist Damon Salvatore.”

I laughed as he spun me around, “I’ll need to check in with Stefan to make sure that’s true.”

Damon dipped me and looked into my eyes. Before I knew it, I closed the gap between us. His lips were soft and he tasted of scotch. The kiss started soft, but got hungry. I ran my fingers through his hair and he picked me up, speeding us to the wall.

His lips trailed down my neck and I ran my hands down his chest, unbuttoning his shirt. One thing led to another and we ended up in his bedroom with a trail of clothes behind us.

Waking up the next morning, I felt refreshed. I sat up quickly, confused, but let out a sigh of relief once I noticed I was in Damon’s room. Falling back in the bed, I pulled the covers around me. I rolled over and felt a draft. Furrowing my eyebrows I looked under the covers to see that I was naked.

“Oh..” I mumbled.

“Morning.” Damon spoke, walking out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist. My eyes trailed down his chest before connecting them back with his.

“Did we have sex last night?”

“Wow, right to the point.” He responded, walking over to his closet.

“I’m taking that as a yes… Well, okay. I don’t remember it but I was great wasn’t I?” I joked, jumping out of his bed.

“Don’t get cocky.” He smirked, pulling out a shirt and tossing it to me.

I narrowed my eyes at him, “you’re acting weird.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you’re acting weird. I’m your best and only friend. So what’s up?” I stated, pulling the shirt over my head. It fell just above my knees.

“Do you regret last night?”

I thought about it for a few moments. “Depends. If I tell you the truth will it ruin our friendship?”

“Depends.” He smirked, mocking me.

I smiled, “well, truthfully. No. I may not remember it but I’m sure you were probably just as drunk. And I’d rather it be you than some homeless guy on the street or something. I wouldn’t mind if it happened again.” I laughed.

“Are you flirting with me?” Damon asked, turning to face me.

“I don’t know… Am I?” I joked, smiling.

“Well since were getting everything out in the open, can I tell you something?” His voice sounded nervous. I arched an eyebrow but nodded my head.

He sped in front of me and held my face in his hands.

“I’ve loved you since I first met you. To be honest, I remember last night. And it was probably the best night of my life. But if you don’t feel the same way, then you can just forget what I said.. Because if I can’t have you in that way then I’d rather be your friend then nothing at all.”

His words shocked me. When I didn’t respond he slowly nodded his head before turning around.

“So. What are we doing today?” Damon spoke as if nothing just happened.

“I love you too.” It came out like a whisper, but by how fast Damon turned back around I knew he heard it.

He smiled before walking towards me, taking my face in his hands again. His eyes scanned my face before pulling me into a passionate kiss.

Pulling away, I smirked and bit my lip. “Round two? I have a feeling I’ll remember it this time.” Damon smirked but connected our lips again.

Kinda sucks, but I hope you like it!! xx

You’re My Starlight

Pairing: Tom Holland X Reader

Words: 612

Warnings: none.

Anon asked “Hi could you write a similar story as sleep sugar with tom holland? Ps I love you”
“I need sleep sugar with tom holland like I need Jesus in my life”

A/N: The song is Cradled in Love by Poets of the Fall which is basically the best band to ever exist. Let me know if you want to be tagged HERE or HERE.

Keep reading

LOYALTY (Series)

***Gangster AU*** 

PART I. The Beginning

Trust me.

That was the last thing Rome told me before he pushed me over the building’s ledge. My life flashed before my eyes in the few moments that were left before I hit whatever waited for me at the bottom. The funny thing was, the only memories that I could remember were all the ones we shared together. Fuck my life.

This time I didn’t fall for the wrong guy. I fell for the worst one. How is it that I manage to find the best among the worst every single time? But Rome was different. I knew it in my gut.

The night I met him, I automatically made lists of all the stupid things we could do together. Just by the five seconds he grabbed my shoulder and told me that the tag on my Versace dress was still on. Cupid kicked me when he yanked the tag off and threw it on the floor before headed to the building I was just exiting.

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Thank You

Pairing: Sam x female!Reader

Request: no depression/other illnesses but Sam just has little moments where certain cases get to him and he just needs a shoulder to cry on and someone who’ll cuddle with him and let him talk and cry and won’t judge him for it. - @saxxxology

Word Count: 1,627

Warnings: angst, character death, fluff, season 12 spoilers, canon divergence, sad!Sam

A/N: Hella canon divergence - the events of the series are all jumbled and switched around. Set immediately after the events of 12x23, contains spoilers. Written from Sam’s POV.

Beat: @impala-dreamer <3

Originally posted by yaelstiel

“Sammy?” Her face came slowly through the small crack in the door. “You awake?”

“Mm-hm.” I hummed, not moving from my spot in bed, curled up in the fetal position. She’d found me like this too many times already for me to try to hide from her now. She knew, that’s why she was here. 

“Roll over.” Her hand trailed up my arm and over my shoulder, pulling my hair back over my neck. “C’mon Sam. Talk to me,” she urged. As I turned to face her, she didn’t move. Her hand moved over my collarbone and eventually fell over the ball of my opposite shoulder, then drifted across to the middle of my back. I sighed and tucked my face into the crook of her neck, nuzzling against the warmth and familiar smell of her skin. “That isn’t talking, Sam.” She tried to stifle her giggle, but it came through anyway. “What happened?”

“C- Cas.” I stuttered, barely choking out his name before the lump in my throat became too much to talk around.

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PART 3!!!

Surprise I wanted to put it up now. Sorry I know it’s late a pretty lame update and it hecka sucks but #4 is about to be great. Love you guys!

Rating: PG maybe

It was impossible to sleep that night. The reveal of my art piece was approaching quickly and my nerves were catching up to me.

I got a text from my mum first thing in the morning saying she was so proud and excited to see me. I had picked out what I was going to wear weeks ago.

The black dress hug my porcelain curves, the red lipstick I boldly chose matches my red shoes and hang back.

I felt like I was going to something as significant as the Grammys. My dark hair falling in perfect ringlets as I curl it.

I arrived at the studio early, much earlier than required. I observed the blank space on the wall that would soon hold my masterpiece.

Artwork that I’ve tried to express multiple times in my teenage years but just finally was able to do.

My parents are the first to show up. They race to hug me.

I introduce them to the owner of the art gallery who I met while sketching at a coffee shop. My artwork caught his eye and he said he wanted to see more. I want to say it is because he liked my work more than the fact I was drawing a nude woman.

Many strangers show up. Already with still a half hour left until we start, there is a much bigger turnout than I expected.

The art covered walls feeling much closer together as my nervousness increases.

Calum, Ashton and Michael all show up. Michel brings a girl who I do not recognize.

“Is my art reveal the place you bring a girl on a first date?” I question as the blond wanders away to look at the other art pieces.

“Well I get major props for knowing the artist.” Michael bumps me.

I grin and look at all of them. They are all dressed up, meaning they are wearing button ups. Sure michaels is only half tucked in and calum is wearing blue jeans but it’s really the effort that counts.

“It really means a lot that you guys are here.” I smile at them.

“Aww!” Ashton squeals like a girl before hugging me.

“Have you guys heard from Luke?” I ask nonchalantly.

They shake their heads. I brush it off, I’m sure he is on his way.

When the owner starts calling for everyone to gather together I glance at the door one more, waiting for Luke to make one of his last minute entrances.

I make my way up to the front, while I was chatting with people I didn’t notice them put up my painting. It is covered by a thin cloth so no one can see it.

I glance down at my phone. There is a text from Luke:

Finally couldn’t put off taking ‘A’ out to dinner any longer. Wanna hang after?

I swear I could literally feel my heart being smashed. All of the pieces tearing through my body, desperate to find their way back together. But they were too lost.

He had forgotten and her again Arzaylea got what she wanted. On the night that was supposed to be mine.

I know if he had remembered he would have been the first person here. He would have wanted to come out to dinner with my parent and I after and he would have calmed my nerves before the show.

He wasn’t here, instead he was with her probably fighting.

I feel as I am about to cry. In front of all of these people. Everyone is looking at me, am I crying and not noticing it.

The one say I do decide to wear make up of course I would ruin it.

The owner says my name and I realized he was speaking to me.

“I’m so sorry. what?” I ask.

“Nerves seem to get the best of these young people.” He makes a joke. Many people laugh and I pull together my best smile.

“Why don’t you uncover your piece when you are ready and tell us about it.” He says.

My eyes scan the faces of the room once more. Hoping Luke remembered and snuck in without me noticing. I’m yet again let down.

The thing is I’m not even mad. I’m just so incredibly hurt, this was one of the most important nights of my life and he promised.

I slowly remove the barrier and everyone claps before pulling out their cameras. My mother has been filming since she got here.

“I want to catch my baby girls big moment.” Her words ring through my head.

“It took me a really long time to think of a name for this piece. Eventually I just went with ‘Air’.” I say. “It is painted with oil based paints. To me it represents freedom and individuality.”

My painting has a silhouette girl who is off centered next to a house. It is a pallet of colors. She is holding on to a bunch of balloons that I like to are pulling her up, wherever she wants.

The small room that recently seemed so full suddenly seems so empty. One of the only people I wanted to be here celebrating wasn’t.

I try to swallow back the tears of sadness the blur my vision. One single drop wins the battle as it slides down my cheek, the rest of its arm fallows in its quick descent down my face.

“There is a reason I wants the girl to remain identity less. Because I do think of this as a self portrait but adding something like skin color or hair color could ruin the illusion that this could be any other woman out there. Those fighting for freedom, equality.” My voice cracks as I continue to cry.

My mothers eyes mirror mine, smiling as proud and happy emotions stroll from her eyes.

“Those fighting for love. I wanted this to be a painting that could be looked at and see from so many different perspectives and points of view. See yourself in my work. I do this for the world.” I finish my speech.

The audience stars applauding and as much as I feel it’s impossible I muster up a smile.

“Wow. It is very phenomenal that this piece means this much to you. And it is only through true emotion like this do we find success and beauty in one’s art.” The owner of the gallery starts another round of applause.

I think them all, excusing myself to get some air.

On a day that is suppose to be about me I would ruin it crying over some boy. I painted the girl to be me but I don’t feel half as strong or beautiful as I want people to feel when they look at it.

I’m joined outside by Calum. I wipe my eyes and smile at him.

At least people think I’m crying for a different reason.

He pulls me in for a hug, rubbing my back.

“I’m sorry he wasn’t here today.” He says.

The waterworks start all over again. We pull away from each other i try to conceal myself but I can’t.

He already knows anyways. Everyone knows that I’m so in love with Luke. Everyone but Luke.

“I don’t know why I’m letting him get to me like his.” I rub my face, a lot of my makeup coming off with it.

“He said he would be here. It’s not right and you have every right to be upset. It’s not fair. He is supposed to be here.” Calum says.

I wonder if he knows where Luke actually is.

“Yeah well he has other obligations. Like a girlfriend who he is with right now.” I say.

The surprise etched in his face shows me he didn’t.

“He is with Arzaylea? What? 10 times out of 10 he would rather be with you.” Calum says.

“That’s not true.” I shake my head. Luke and I do have the best fun together but there is something about being in a relationship with someone. You want to be with them all the time.

That’s how I’ve always felt about Luke except we aren’t in a relationship.

“They just fight a lot. I’m scared sometimes he is unhappy but then there is days like this where he forgets about me because he is with her.” I wipe the unders of my eyes.

“I don’t think he ever stops thinking about you.” Calum says quietly. “Do you ever think the reason Luke is so unhappy with Arzaylea is because she isn’t the one he wants to be with.”

Calum seems like he is almost trying to hint something.

“What? What are you saying?” I squint at him through my tears.

“Oh my gosh. You are both so blind. He likes you, as more than a friend.” Calum rolls his eyes.

I shake my head in disbelief “Luke doesn’t think of me that way. I’m nothing more than a friend to him.” My soul breaks as I say that.

More and more these days being with Luke seems to not even be possible. Like a dream I need to give up on.

“Drunk Luke can’t keep a secret from Calum.” Calum speaks of himself which makes me laugh.

I still don’t know if I believe what he is saying.

But what if he is right. All those times I’ve caught Luke staring at me isn’t because he is spacing out. When he tries to make me laugh with horrible jokes or pays attention to me over his girlfriend.

Maybe Calum is right.

I don’t know if I have enough willpower to find out though.


I remember back in the day, like five years ago, when me and Simon lived together, we sat down and watched Eurovision. It was one of the funniest nights in my life, cause Simon was just- he just- it was obviously just one of those moments where Simon was just being Simon, and he was just SO funny. We just had the best night of our lives, and ever since I’ve really kind of had this soft spot for Eurovision. I used to try and watch it with Simon, but I dunno- you know what happens when people drift away from each other, it’s a bit sad.
—  Lewis talking about Eurovision and Simon (Triforce! #45)
Not Your Dean (Part 20)

Originally posted by rowenaskitten

Summary: One day Dean shows up and moves back into the bunker. The only problem is he’s a demon and he’s hiding something…

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19

Pairing: Demon!Dean x reader

Word Count: 1,100ish

Warnings: language

A/N: If Demon Dean is more your heart’s desire…

Keep reading

Forbidden [Kim Jongin] - Part 6

Summary: Your kiss escalates to something more.

Genere: Smut, fluff (at the end… idk)

Warnings: Sex

AU: Royals

Pairing: Kim Jongin x Reader

Originally posted by dazzlingkai

He almost immediately kissed me back. His soft lips against mine made me remember how much I wanted him. That night in the garden was a true revolution in my life. Rejecting Jongin was actually the best thing I could do. But now, I just didn’t care. I didn’t care about the differences between us. He was a prince and I was a servant. It just didn’t matter anymore. I even forgot about lady Shin.

I felt him nibbling on my bottom lip, asking for entrance. My lips parted and his tongue swept into my mouth. He brought me even closer to him and I slowly started to lose control. I tangled my hand in his hair and tilted his head, so I could deepen the kiss. Now, I was kneeling on the mattress, while Jongin was sitting on it. Without breaking the kiss, his hand caressed my cheek, as he pulled me onto his lap.

“I just can’t” he whispered against my lips “I just can’t stay away from you”

He started to kiss my jawline and next he moved to my neck. Sucking and nibbling on it. One of my hands was still in his hair and I used the second one to cover my mouth, muffling my moans. Breath hitched in my throat when he found my sweet spot and sucked on it viciously.

“No, baby” Jongin took my hand away from my lips “I want to hear you”

He gently rubbed my sides and once more attached his lips to my neck. This time, I didn’t hold back. I let out a moan, feeling him smile against my skin.

“If you want me to stop” Jongin placed a kiss on my collarbone “Then just tell me” another one a bit lower “I won’t make any further move”

I knew I had to stop it. He even gave me an opportunity to do it. I knew how this is going to affect our future, but I promised myself one thing. That I will listen to my heart. Only my heart.

“No” I whispered and Jongin looked up at me “I’m yours. Do what you want. Kiss me, touch me, just… Just take me”

In that moment he connected our lips together. The kiss was much more rough than the previous ones we shared, but sweet at the same time. There were all words and feeling we wanted to say and express, but we couldn’t. Anxiety, pain, cowardice, fear. But also hope, courage and love.

His hand slowly traveled against my thigh and pushed back the dress I was wearing. I felt myself shiver.

“What happened?” Jongin quickly pulled away “Too much?”

He was worried and shocked at the same time. I could see it clearly.

Should I tell him? Was there anything I could lose? I guess not. I already risked almost everything I got. For unknown reason, I had a feeling I could tell him everything. There was something in our complicated relationship that just made me trust him.

“I-I’ve never… “ I stuttered unable to match the words “Jongin I’ve n-never…”

He looked at me and smiled gently.

“You’ve never done…” he paused for a while “That?”

I nodded shyly, blush spreading against my cheeks.

“That’s okay. There’s nothing to be shy about” he said “We don’t need to hurry. It’s your decision”

“But I want to do it” serious tone of my voice surprised me “I want to do it with you”

I saw some kind of spark in his eyes. Now, I realised how straightforward I was. He rubbed my back and asked:

“Are you sure?”

Unable to say anything, I just nodded. Jongin smiled, gently kissing my forehead, my cheek, and finally, my lips.

“I promise I’m going to make it perfect to you” he whispered, brushing strand of my hair off my face “At least, I’ll do everything to make it like this. It’s all about you now”

Taking a deep breath, I lowered my head to connect our lips. It wasn’t rushed or forced. Any of our kisses was like that, but they tend to be more rough. This one was something new, something I’ve never felt before. It was slow, sweet and gentle. His soft lips were working against mine, making me feel like I am on cloud nine. I used my hand to undo the first button of his shirt. While I was doing it, he pushed up the hem of my clothing and carresed my thigh. His touch was making me shiver, but not in a wrong way. I just needed him. And I needed him now.

I didn’t even realise how quickly his shirt fell of his arms. When he finally pulled away from the kiss, my eyes immediately went to his toned chest. I knew Jongin was good-looking and I should expect him having some muscles, but I felt shocked somehow. My cheeks went red. I used one of my fingers to caress his chest. The prince sighed loudly. His hand traveled up my thigh to my stomach, while he used the second one to unbutton my shirt.

“Are you sure?” he asked quietly, still savouring my touch “We can still stop”

I looked down at him. His eyes were half-opened and he was breathing heavily.

“No” I kissed him quickly “Please, don’t ask me that question anymore”

The servant who helped me change left the underwear on me. I didn’t know if I was grateful or not. I took his palm and placed it on the clasp of my bra, kissing his jawline.

“Take me” I whispered against his skin “I’m all yours”

His lips found mine for a thousand time, while he took of my bra. Without breaking the kiss, he placed his hands on a small of my back. Gently moving me from his lap onto bed, Jongin moved his lips to my neck. Now, I was laying on my back, the prince hovering above my half-naked body. For some reason, I didn’t feel any urge to hide myself. The only thing I was wearing, were some panties. He pulled away from my neck and his eyes traveled up and down my body.

“God” he whispered “You are beautiful”

Blush creeped up my cheeks, as he lowered himself to place butterfly kisses on my stomach. Every single one was making me want him more and more. My hands went to his arms and caressed them. He stopped kissing my body and I whined loudly, feeling like something’s missing. Now, I realised how fast was my heart racing. It felt like it could jump out of my chest in any second.

“I’m sorry” he chuckled, his eyes all over me once more “I just had to look at you once more”

I blushed at his words and said quietly:

“There’s nothing impressive in me”

Without even knowing, I moved my arms to cover my naked chest. Before I could do it, Jongin grabbed them and pinned to bed.

“How dare you say that?” he asked “You are the most beautiful, gorgeous woman I have ever seen”

He kissed me roughly, shoving his tongue into my mouth. I moaned loudly against his lips and quickly started to push his pants down. I’ve never felt this before. I never wanted anyone the way I wanted Jongin now.

His hand caressed my thigh and moved to the hem of my panties. He broke the kiss and looked deeply into my eyes. It was like a question, our last decision, but I was sure. Without hesitating, I gave him a small nod and he pulled my down slowly. I closed my eyes, feeling the heat on my cheeks. Suddenly, I heard his pants, the last piece of clothing separating us, hit the ground.

He gently kissed my neck and breath caught in my throat.

“Do you trust me?” he asked

“Yes” I whispered

“It may be a bit uncomfortable at first, but then it’ll feel good” his words made me open my eyes “Do you believe me?”

I saw that he was also afraid. I could feel that. But not because it was his first time too. It was because he was afraid to hurt me.

“I do” I said with a shaky voice

Jongin kissed me and slowly lined himself with my entrance. I felt the tension between us grow. My heart started to race faster, if that was even possible. He slid himself inside me, a loud gasp escaping my lips.

“Everything’s fine?” he breathed out “Does it hurt? Do you want me to stop?”

It was uncomfortable, just like he said it’s going to be, but I was trying to be prepared for that. I knew Jongin didn’t want to do anything wrong so I just shook my head.

He slowly pushed in further, making me moan. The prince growled slightly and gave me a few seconds to adjust. I felt his hot breath against the skin of my neck. The feeling of that uncomfortable stretch passed away after some time. The need of him was stronger than anything else.

“P-please” I whined “Move”

Jongin looked at me and started to set a slow pace, pushing himself inside and out of me. That rhythm was just perfect. He didn’t hurt me in any way. The only thing he gave me was pleasure I’ve never felt before. I grabbed at his shoulders and let out another moan:

“Oh, God”

His lips found mine in a sweet, yet heated kiss. I felt him speed up a little, a sudden yelp escaping my mouth. This was something I’ve never felt before. I knew I won’t regret giving all of me to Jongin. I trusted him and I loved him. I didn’t say that before because I was afraid to. I wasn’t sure what he felt. I was scared that I was just another girl for him, but now I knew that it was just dumb of me thinking that way. Somehow now, I was sure.

I bit on my bottom lip, trying not to scream when he hit that spot. The pleasure now was delightful. It was something better than before. I lifted up my hips, so I could feel him even more.

Suddenly, I felt something strange build up my core.

“J-Jongin” I whispered “I-I’m-”

“I know” he interrupted me “I can feel you”

Then he shifted himself and nibbled on my ear, saying quietly:

“Come for me, baby”

His words send me over the edge. I dig my nails into his back and his name left my lips in a loud half-scream, half-moan. A wave of pleasure hit my body and a few seconds after, I heard Jongin growl, burying his face in the crock of my neck. I felt something warm inside me as he thrusted a few time before pulling away.

The prince fell down on the mattress next to me. Both of us breathing heavily, both of us covered in sweat. His hand sneaked around my waist and he pulled me closer to his body. I looked up and my eyes met his chocolate brown ones. With a gentle smile on my face, I moved his sticky hair from his forehead.

“You’re beautiful” he whispered, taking my hand and kissing my knuckles

I giggled and buried my face in his chest.

“What?” he chuckled

“You’re saying this again” I mumbled “And it’s embarrassing”

“But it’s the truth” the prince tickled me slightly “I wouldn’t lie to you about anything”

I sighed and closed my eyes, with a grin on my face. I tried enjoying the last few minutes in Jongin’s embrace. Soon I had to be going. It wasn’t safe to be here.

What am I even talking about?

Doing the thing we’ve done wasn’t safe. We were in the castle and I was sure someone heard us because, being honest, we weren’t as quiet as we wanted to be.

God. I just did what every girl in the kingdom dreamed of. I just gave my virginity to prince Kim Jongin. It was unbelievable.

I smiled and soon after it, I started to laugh.

“What is it?” he asked

“Nothing” I managed to say “I guess I’m just happy”

“That’s good” Jongin placed a kiss on my forehead “I promised that it’s going to be perfect, didn’t I?”

I nodded and turned around, so my back was facing him.

“I need to go” I said

“Why?” he pulled me into him once more

“Because you know what will happen when someone will find me here. It’s nearly 3pm. Anyone can come here in any minute”

“But they can’t entre without my permission” I felt the mattress sank as he shifted himself on his arm

“It’s better to be careful, Jongin”

I tried to sit up, pulling the covers with me, but suddenly I felt some pain between my legs, making me hiss quietly. That was something unexpected. No one told me it’ll hurt after. I decided to lay down.

“I think I’ll just stay for few more minutes” I curled up to Jongin’s chest once more with a huge grin on my face

Author’s note: I’m sorry.