just peeing

That video of the guy with his kids interrupting his interview but instead

General Organa : *discussing war and important issues to council via space Skype*

Toddler Ben : * dances in, wielding a toy saber* R2 rolls in behind him

Han : frantically bursts in, attempting to wrangle his unruly toddler and oblivious droid

god though… chyler so openly talking about kissing girls irl like it just makes me so happy? she’s so fine with saying it, and saying it didn’t just happen once. and it isn’t a joke or something to just get a laugh, it’s actually something that happened in her life and she’s totally chill actually talking about it and doesn’t make it weird or make it some “sensationalist” kinda thing even if it only happened a few times and it didn’t change her life

and her saying the word lesbian, too. constantly calling alex a lesbian, not just gay. that makes me so happy to hear because she’s so ready to just say it. and most people don’t? they shy away from it like it’s a dirty word because society has programmed us all to feel that way. but it’s a beautiful word and a beautiful thing to be and her saying it so much and as often as she does makes me happy

anyway, chyler leigh makes me happy no matter what she does because she never does anything wrong or bad and is so supportive and amazing and beautiful… god i love her

an occurrence among the marauders
  • james: what kind of drill do you want, sirius?
  • sirius: i want one right in the ass.
  • james: ...
  • sirius: ...
  • james: ...
  • sirius: ...i'm not gay, james! it was a joke!
  • *later on that day*
  • remus: *takes his shirt off*
  • sirius: IM SO GAY, IM FUCKING GA

After the game, Dave asks Roxy to void him up some apple juice. 

“Just don’t think about pee while you do it,” John adds.

Roxy freezes; how do you not think about piss after someone says something like that. She thinks her hardest about apple juice, fearful that other thoughts will slip in. A bottle appears, full of yellow liquid. 

Roxy and Dave stare at it with trepidation. 

“Goddamn it John,” Dave says

realizing you’re on the ace spectrum like

“I’d hit that.” “You… you don’t even know them though??”

“Oh come on, everyone has a list of celebrities they’d totally have sex with if they had a chance.” “Haha yeah ok” *internally* what

"Ya so like for the past few years I’ve felt zero attraction to people I wasn’t friends with first?? Lol what’s up with that”

Why did you have to have sex with them?? Couldn’t you just hold it?? Like pee??

“You’ll meet someone who makes you feel like that someday, don’t worry” “……sounds fake but ok”

“Sex is an important part of a relationship! Everyone has sexual needs!” “….sounds fake but ok”

“Dude that girl is so hot” “I know right?? Look at her fucking eyeliner. Goals. The fuck.” “No I meant like… look at that ass” “Are we looking at the same person are you really focussing on her ass look at how visually appealing her outfit is and dont you dare fuckin tell me that eyeliner isnt fierce as hell

“Aesthetic attraction and sexual attraction are two different things” *puzzle pieces vERY RAPIDLY FALLING INTO PLACE*

*staring at the ceiling at two-thirty in the morning* i could die a virgin and i would regret absolutely nothing

“What’s your ideal girl like?” “Uh… my best friend?” “Oh cute, you want your girlfriend to be the one who knows you best!” “No I meant I am literally only attracted to my best friend she is my ideal girl please help I am dying”

“We’ve been dating for six months and we still haven’t had sex!!” “Have you marathoned Star Wars together yet?” “Yeah we did that like two weeks ago” “Well what more do you want

*thinking about an attractive woman* *dissecting my entire personality and sexuality to figure out why I’m attracted to her this time* is it the muscles. Oh my god is this a sex thing. Oh my god what the hell is this. Oh my god what the fuck is the wtf the fuck the fUCK

*Next day* Zarya could punch me in the face while eating me out and I’d let her but only because she’s a fictional character and therefore could literally never do that


(why is that tho. maybe i should look into that *doesnt look into it*)

“What do you find most attractive in a girl?” “Gotta love those strong emotional bonds” “No I meant like what’s a turn-on for you?” “DID I McFUCKING STUTTER”

*staring at the ceiling at two-thirty in the morning again* sexual attraction should be added to the cryptid wikia

“Yeah sex sounds like a great stress reliever and a nice way to strengthen the bonds between you and your partner(s)” “Well there’s more to it than that…” *The Arctic Monkey’s Do I Wanna Know starts playing in my head* “Haha ok buddy”

"There’s more to being ace than just not being interested in having sex or not feeling sexual attraction. In fact there’s a whole spectrum. You may even feel sexual attraction sometimes but still be ace. You can also be gay and ace at the same time.” “…bro.” “Also it’s totally normal.” *sobbing* “…bro. Bro there are words for it there’s an entire list oh my god-”


it’s 3 am and i should be sleeping yet here i am making klangsty videos lmao ¯\_(ツ)_/¯  

from the first 2 chapters of HGAPFY.


They couldn’t think of something to say the day you burst
With all their lions

and all their might

and all their thirst
They crowd your bedroom like some thoughts wearing thin
Against the walls

against your rules 

against your skin
My beard grew down to the floor and out through the doors

Of your eyes, begonia skies like a sleepyhead, 



Do we turn you on? (Muke threesome)

Summary: Your best friends pick up on the fact that the both of them make you insanely horny (i can’t do summaries okay i suck)

Word count: 3k

Warnings: This is smut! Luke assumes ‘dom’ position and they all have a threesome ;) 

There’s a little bit of NSFW above the ‘keep reading’ line!

A/N: I’m such a slut for muke I’m surprised this is my first threesome with them? Let’s just say I let my imagination run pretty wild haha :) enjooooy!

Originally posted by ariana527

Michael’s warm fingertips trail across your upper arm, the heat causing goosebumps to pebble across your sensitive skin. As you’re sitting so close to the boy, you can smell the deep musky scent of his aftershave and feel a tug of desire to lean across and smash your lips against his.

You would if you weren’t in a room with your other best friend.

Luke’s leaning against a white wall, his blond hair tousled into loose curls. You take a moment to admire his wide stance before your attention drifts to his fingers curled around his phone. So many night you’ve spent - in the crowd at one of their shows - watching his fingers work magic on his guitar.

You’ve always wondered what they’d feel like inside you.

You imagine they’d be nimble: Luke always brags about his ability to twirl his fingers at perfect angles. But at the same time, there’s no doubt in your mind that he’d move quickly, immediately establishing his dominance before proceeding to bend you over a table.

“Did you just moan?”

Keep reading

abrokenseed  asked:

Buttons was in my dream last night. For some reason we were in a classroom setting and he asked about something, but the person in charge said he couldn't do it there so he slunked away with a really weird walk? What even was that, brain?

you abandoned him in a time he needed you the most

anonymous asked:

Looks like it's back to the men's room dude. Thanks President Trump.

I’m so curious to know, how does it feel to be so vacuously uninformed and short sighted?

First of all, he only rolled back federal guidance on the issue. No law has changed. Thankfully, the legality is still squarely in the hands of the court system. Don’t get me wrong, though, Trump is a promise breaking, small minded, narcissistic, dumpster fire of a human being and it was wrong of him to even roll back the guidance, especially since he only did it to pander to the bigots in the religious right.

Second, this only applies to students in public education. So even if it was law which, again, it isn’t, it wouldn’t apply to me.

So congratulations, moron, your lame attempt to spit hate at me only managed to highlight your own stupidity. Feel good now?

But let’s pretend, just for a moment, that you weren’t an abject failure, and that this did affect me and I was legally supposed to start using the men’s room. Let’s play out a couple scenarios. I’m confident you’ll quickly see why this policy is so poorly thought out.

1. I could flagrantly break the law, continue using the women’s restroom, and no one would know the difference. Yes, in countless many cases, the law would be completely ineffective and unenforceable. Sure, you could keep the trans women who don’t enjoy ‘passing’ privilege out, but tons of us would still be in those bathrooms every day. So, congratulations, you’ve accomplished very little. Never mind the fact that we’re not hurting anyone or putting kids in any danger. It’s an empty claim, a solution to a problem that doesn’t exist, and it’s a highly ineffective ‘solution’ at that.

2. I probably wouldn’t choose to break the law, simply because that would be so very much worse for people like you. Let me illuminate your painfully dark existence… If trans women like me started using the men’s room and brawny, bearded trans men started using the women’s room, it’s actually going to create problems where none previously existed. Women will be freaking out at the trans men in their restrooms. Men will be completely uncomfortable having pretty women that they find sexually attractive in the place where they have to have a bowel movement (not to mention that they’ll know we were born with a penis, which will totally wreck their fragile male egos). Before you know it, trans men and women will be getting attacked in restrooms all over the country. The law that was passed to protect people in the bathroom (when no one was in any danger and no trans people were attacking any women or kids) will have caused many, many attacks to occur, and trans people will clearly be the victims. Public sympathy will swing in our favor so fast it’ll snap all support for this or any other anti transgender legislation out there. Would I be willing to take a beating for that? You fucking bet I would (and you had better believe that anyone who tries to attack me isn’t going to walk away unscathed because I’ll fight back with every ounce of strength in my body).

So please, laugh it up, you shallow fool. Enjoy your tiny ‘victory’ delivered to you by your reality TV ratings driven president and his bigoted attorney general. At best, it’s temporary and at worst, should your team manage to land a few more similar wins, it’ll ultimately bring the downfall of your whole agenda. Your move…

I should probably take a moment to mention that I’ve thoroughly enjoyed the opportunity you’ve given me to write about this, and that you’ve put a smile on my face and the spring of being on the right side of history in my step. I bet the same can’t be said for you right about now and, if that’s the case, you might want to take a hard look at the cost/benefit ratio of being needlessly hateful.