just over here sobbing quietly into this pillow

Gone - Part 4

@ shitsxnxgiggles  @ mayfeather27  

Part 4!!!

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The first-time Bucky tries to touch your stomach, Natasha attacks him and Thor puts him in a restrictive hold. It had been innocent, just Bucky wanting to feel the baby kick, and suddenly your two self-appointed protectors are flying across the room and restraining him.

“Oh my God!” you yelp, “Tasha! Thor! Stop it! Let him go!” Neither of them listen to you, and Natasha starts growling at Bucky in Russian, “STEVE!!!!”

Steve runs into the room, and lets out a put-upon sigh when he sees Tasha and Thor. “Guys, let him go”

“He hurt her once, I won’t let him hurt her again” Tasha snarled, but she slowly let him go.

Thor released Bucky once Natasha had. The god still glared at Bucky, but he stepped out of the room at Steve’s insistence.

“Ow” Bucky groaned sitting up from his position on the floor.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah, sweetheart, I’m fine. Just have a few new bruises”

“Help me up and we can go to my room. You can feel our son kick there, hopefully no one will attack you when we’re there.”

Bucky smiles and gently pulls you up from the couch. Two weeks after Bucky had found everyone in Ireland, you had decided to move back to New York. You didn’t have to hide from Bucky anymore so there was no point to be out of the country. The two of you head to the elevator and JARVIS takes you up to your floor.

Once you close the door to your floor, Bucky turns to look at you, hope in his eyes, “I can really touch you?”

You smile softly, “Yes you can.” Ever since he had been back, you had barely let Bucky touch you. At first it had been because you were skeptical, you didn’t quite believe his story about Rumlow and Hydra. You didn’t believe him until he showed you the files and the plans that Hydra had for you and your son. Hydra had used one of their undercover nurses to find out about the pregnancy, Bucky had taken care of her, and they had intended to use your breakup with Bucky to bring you back to Hydra.

Bucky gently nudged you backwards until your legs nudge against the bed, then he helps you up onto it. Bucky arranges you so you were laying on your back and supported by a bunch of pillows.

His hands hover over the hem of your t-shirt, which is really his shirt, he looks up at you with big, desperate grey eyes, “Can I …”

You pull up your shirt and tug your yoga pants down slightly, exposing your stomach in its entirety. Bucky’s fingers tremble as he brushed them gently along our stomach. You were lucky, there weren’t very many stretchmarks on you, and you made sure that your skin stayed silky soft. Bucky let out a soft sob when you took one of his hands and pressed it flat to your stomach. After a moment, the baby kicked, right where his hand was.

“The baby just kicked me!” He gasped, eyes wide with delight.

“Yeah babe, he did”

Bucky leaned down and pressed a kiss just below your belly button, nuzzling closer when the baby began to nudge him again. Suddenly Bucky looked up at you with tear filled eyes, “I so sorry I haven’t been there for you” he sobbed, “I missed so much, I missed you so much”

“Come here, baby”

Bucky crawled up the bed and tucked himself tightly against your back, a pillow supporting your stomach. You lace your fingers with his and lay your hands over your stomach.

You can feel Bucky nizzle the back of your neck, laying quietly with you for a while. After about an hour he sits up, “Doll, I gotta tell you something” he pulls you up into a sitting position

“What is it?”

“I need you to stand up for a minute”

You heave yourself onto your feet. Bucky drops down onto one knee, and hesitantly reaches into his pocket, pulling out a small black box. You gasp, your eyes widening, one hand rising to cover your mouth. “Buck, is that …”

“Just give me a minute” He takes a deep breath. “I know that I’m a major fuck up, that I can never seem to do the right thing when it comes to you. But, I love you with everything I have. I love you with all my soul, and I love our child even though they aren’t even here yet. I know that I’ve done horrible things, and that I can never escape that, but you make me better. You make me whole. Y/N Y/L/N, will you do me the honor of marrying me?”

You gasp, “Yes! Oh, my God, Bucky, yes!”

With a delighted laugh, he slides the ring onto your finger and wraps you with a tight hug. You laugh when he spins you around, he’s strong enough to lift you even with your added weight. Suddenly you feel a warm, wet sensation in your pants.

“Bucky …”

“What is it, doll?” Bucky sets you down, still grinning. His smile immediately falls when he sees your concerned face

“My water just broke” you whisper

“What? Speak up, I can’t hear you”

“My water just broke, Buck. The baby’s coming”

Natasha has been alerted, and Bruce is on his way. James, if you would kindly sit Y/N in a chair and breath, sir. It would be most unfortunate for you to faint

“I’m calm, I’m calm” Bucky rushes. He quickly scoops you up and gently sets you down in a chair, gripping your hand with his.

Tasha is the first one to get to the room, “Y/N, where is your bag?”

“In the closet.” You gasp as you feel your first contraction. It isn’t the worst pain you have ever felt, not yet, but you can tell that eventually when they come closer together it’s going to feel like hell.

Tasha pulls the blanket and sheet back, laying out a waterproof cover onto the bed. She then lays down another sheet and several towels. You were going to give birth in the tower, Tony and Bruce had the most advanced technology in America, and since Bruce was technically a doctor he had agreed to help you. Soon everyone was gathered in the room, Bruce wheeling in an IV pole, and Tony bringing in a heart monitoring system for you and the baby.

Bucky gently smooths your hair out of your face, “How ya doin’, doll?” he whispered

You chuckle, “As well as I can be right now”

“Barnes, help Y/N onto the bed, she needs to get into her gown. Everyone but James, turn around” Tasha snaps

Bucky helps you strip down and get into a nightgown. As soon as you put your hand onto the bed you feel another contraction squeeze through you.

Bruce quickly put on a pair of gloves, “Your contraction are 7 minutes apart, Y/N. That’s a little close, I’d like to check and see how dilated you are.”

You nod quietly and finish getting onto the bed. Bruce is quick at checking your dilation, “You’re 5 almost 6 centimeters dilated. Your labor is progressing rapidly, but you need to be at least 10 centimeters before you start pushing.”

“It’s probably the serum speeding everything up” Steve says, sitting down beside Bucky.

You nod quietly and try to relax into the sheets. Thor and Tasha sit on the other side of the bed, Clint and Tony taking seats at the end, and Bruce rechecks all his supplies.

“I need to move; I need to kneel” you whimper after about 30 minutes of labor

Bucky helps you into a kneeling position, crouching in front of you, allowing you to support yourself on his shoulders. Bruce checks your dilation again, “9 centimeters, Y/N. Just a little while longer and you can push”

You rest your hands on the bed so you are on your hands and knees and gently rock yourself back and forth. Tasha puts your hair up into a bun, and Thor grabs some ice for you to chew on.

“I need to push” you gasp out 20 minutes later

Bruce quickly puts on a fresh set of gloves and checks you one last time. “Alright, you’re fully dilated, you can push on the next contraction”

You raise yourself up and grab onto Bucky’s shoulders, spreading your knees a bit wider. At your next contraction, you start to push, letting out a sob as you bear down as hard as you can. You keep pushing until the contraction fades and even then, you give tiny little pushes, ready to meet your child. You had decided to keep the gender a surprise, but you had a feeling that you were going to have a son.

You have only been pushing for about 15 minutes when Bruce spoke up, “The baby’s beginning to crown, if you reach down now you can feel the head.”

You do as Bruce suggests, releasing one of Bucky’s shoulder and reaching down to feel your baby, you let out a chocked sob when your fingers come in contact with hair.

“You’re doing so good, doll, so good. I’m so proud of you” Bucky whispers, kissing your forehead.

At the next contraction, you push even harder, crying out when the baby’s head is free from your body.

“Don’t push, Y/N. Bruce has to get the fluid out of the baby’s lungs” Tasha whispers, quickly handing Bruce another towel.

You nod quietly, trembling as you resist the urge to push. Once he baby’s lungs were clear, you were given permission to push again. The baby’s shoulders were quick to deliver and once the shoulders were clear, you quickly reached down to catch the baby as the rest of it slid out.

“Alright, Y/N, swing your leg up and roll onto your back, you have to deliver the placenta”

You obey quickly, Bucky helping you keep your balance when you refuse to let go of your baby. Once you are on your back, Bruce hands Bucky a towel to wipe off the blood. You quickly glance at the baby and gasp when you see that your baby is a little boy.

“Bucky” you whisper frantically, “We have a son, Buck, we have a little boy! Guys, you have a nephew!”

Tony and Thor shout with joy, clamoring to get a peek at the newest Avenger.

You stifle a giggle and glance over at Steve, “Looks like you’re a grandpa, Steve!”

Steve lets out an indignant sound, “No way! I’m the same age as the kids’ dad! I’m gonna be the best uncle ever! If anything, Thor would be the grandpa, he’s over a thousand years old!”

Thor lets out a booming laugh, “Ay, I am”

You chuckle, “Alright, alright. Everyone can be aunts and uncles, if anything Phil or Nick can be the grandpa”

Tony lets out a roar of laughter, “That’ll be the day! Grandpa Fury!”

Bruce smiles, “I think that the baby needs a bath, and you, Y/N need a shower. Tasha and I will give the baby a bath, Clint and Tony can clean up, and Bucky you will help get your fiancé clean … oh! And think of a name of the little guy!”

You look up at Bucky, reluctantly handing over your baby, and heading toward the bathroom, “Have you thought of any names?”

“Umm, Richard? No, then his nickname would be Dick, not happening”

“How about Christopher?”

“Yeah, Christopher, I like that. What about his middle name?”

Bucky blushes, “Can his middle name be Steven?”

“Yeah, I think that’s a fitting name” You start rinsing off, “You know Steve’s gonna cry when he finds out the name”

“I’m looking forward to seeing the bastard cry” Bucky chuckled, ”So his first name is Christopher and his middle name is Steven”

“Yeah,” you whisper, “Christopher Steven Barnes”

“I love it, and I love you” Bucky whispered, leaning in to give you a kiss.

You kiss him back, “I’m all clean, now we need to get out so I can get back to our baby, and so we can tell everyone his name”

Once you and Jason finish drying off, you walk back out into the bedroom. Tasha was holding her nephew, whispering Russian endearments to him. You walk over and scoop the baby up, nuzzling his cheek, “I’m going to feed him, can’t have the little prince go hungry!”

Everyone gather back into the room as you settled down. Tasha once again perching on the side of the bed, “What’s his name?”

You glance over at Steve, “Christopher Steven Barnes. Chris for short”

Thor grinned, “A fine name for a prince! A mighty name for a mighty warrior!”

Steve stands there, his mouth open in shock, “Did you … did you …?”

“Yeah, Cap, we named him after you, thought he might get some of your good luck and old fashion charm”

Steve sniffles and tries to hold back his tears, “I’m … so happy”

Bucky pulls Steve into a hug, “You’re my best friend, of course I’m gonna name my first son after you”

Steve grins, “We’re gonna call in some food, do you want anything?”

“Pizza!”

Bucky chuckles, “What the lady said. Y/N and I’ll stay here with Chris for now. JARVIS will let us know when the food gets here”

Everyone files out of the room quietly so you and Bucky are left alone. You glance over at Bucky, who climb into the bed beside you. You look up at your new fiancé, and then down at your son. All of the people you love are in the next room. You couldn’t think of a better way to bring a child into the word, so loves and so full of potential. Everyone who matters is here, everyone has come home.

—————————————————————————————————

I wrote the birth scene as well as I could. I have never had a baby, but I have witnessed several being born!

So this ends the Gone series. If anyone has any ideas for another series I can write please message me! I need some ideas! Just send them to my inbox!

But I Think Youre So Mean, I Think We Should Try

Read If Youre Gone here!

               Your bed had never felt so cold and empty and your chest had never hurt as bad as it was in that moment. You lay in the dark room staring at the ceiling. Dean’s speech flooding your mind as well as memories; your tears slipped from your eyes and you rolled over into your pillow and let out a sob; ‘I need to fix this’ you thought to yourself.

               You quietly got up and made your way down the hallway, he always slept with his door shut just like you. You slowly pushed it open and let the hall light shine in; there he was sound asleep in bed, his face stained from tears and his eyes were puffy. You bit your lip; if you stepped in this room, there was no going back, you were taking the chance and you were doing this. You were giving your life to save Dean.

               But if you turned and went back to your room, you and Dean would never be together again, no laughing, no hugs, no late night or early morning kisses. No more jokes or cuddles during TV time. You pulled your eyebrows together and sighed. You missed your Dean and if there was a way for you to have him again, mark or not, you were going to take it.

               Slowly, you crept in his room, his woodsy, musk smell hitting you. You smiled biting your lip as you closed your eyes. Dean always smelt so amazing, he smelt like gunpowder, soap, musk and leather. You slowly walked over and stood on the side that was so familiar to you. You ran your fingers lightly over the blankets, sighing as you pulled them back, letting your body slowly sink into your spot.

               Dean felt the movement and instantly opened his eyes, his hand gripping the gun under his pillow. “Dean…” the soft voice that made him feel like he was dreaming called out. “Dean…are you awake?” you whispered.

               You were counting on him to feel you get into bed; slowly he rolled over and looked at you. “Y/N….are you okay?” he whispered. You nodded “yes…I….I need to talk to you” you said lying beside him, as he rolled over and faced you.

               You stared at his sparkling green eyes for a moment, “Dean…I’m still in love with you. And I don’t want to lose you…I don’t want you to change, I’m going to be here for everything…we’re going to remove that mark and I’ll still be here. I fell in love with you because of the amazing man you are, the way you risk everything for someone you don’t know…I wish I could be that amazing” He went to say something, but you stopped him. “Just…hear me out…” you shifted closer to him, taking his hand in yours. “I never want to go through this again; I don’t want to lie in bed at night without you next to me. I don’t want to look around and not see your flannels on the floor, or your leather jacket lay over the chair in the corner. I’m in love with you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you” you whispered pressing your lips to his.

               Dean eagerly kissed you back pulling you into his solid warm chest as his tongue licked your bottom lip. You couldn’t help but smile as he pulled away and pressed his forehead to yours. “I love you so much baby…” he murmured, almost so quietly you didn’t hear him. Almost.

               You smiled at him and snuggled as close as you could get to him. “I love you too Dean” you whispered as you drifted off to sleep.

Read If Youre Gone here!

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