love of mine, someday you will die
but i’ll be close behind and i’ll follow you into the dark
no blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
just our hands clasped so tight, waiting for the hint of a spark…
Song of the Day: I Will Follow You into the Dark by Death Cab for Cutie
“Love of mine, some day you will die But I’ll be close behind I’ll follow you into the dark No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white Just our hands clasped so tight Waiting for the hint of a spark”
“Love of mine, someday you will die But I’ll be close behind and I’ll follow you into the dark No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white Just our hands clasped so tight, waiting for the hint of a spark”
Okay so before I get to the fanfic … I know that in actuality a marriage proposal between Neil and Andrew (don’t tell me Nora says it wouldn’t happen, I don’t even care, she said Aaron’s her favourite Minyard, I’m overruling her) would go something like this:
Andrew is threatening to stab the nurses next time Neil lands himself in the hospital and Andrew isn’t allowed in because he’s not “family” in the legal sense of the word.
And Neil’s like “well, we could just get married.”
And Andrew just kind of looks at him for a while. And then he’s like “yes or no?”
And Neil says yes.
And Andrew raises his percentage.
And they make out.
But I just had to indulge myself in thinking that perhaps there would be a universe where Neil and Andrew would acknowledge that they want to marry for FEELINGS rather than convenience.
So. Here goes (hope the read more works this time or this is gonna be a sucky cliffhanger).
DAY 3: Favorite Hiccstrid Kiss – This was so hard to choose, so I chose all three RttE kisses, because I seriously can’t choose one from the other.
I swear… she had every nerve in my body tingling, had my heartbeat picking up dramatically, and my knees were probably quaking in excitement. She was… gods, she was moving closer now…
I leaned down, and our lips met. It was like fireworks exploded in my brain, while sweet music played in the background in harmony with the way we moved our lips- both cautious and gentle. I gave another shudder of joy and relief… it had finally happened. Man, I had dreamed of this moment for so long… and now, it was finally happening.
Her hands tightened around my fingers, and it was then that I realized I’d moved them to clasp her hands in my own. I held tight, pressing a bit closer before pulling back completely and breaking the kiss. Astrid’s gaze was light and hesitant, as though she was uncertain of what had just happened.
I sighed from the relief and thrill of it all, feeling my heartbeat return to normal as I smiled at her, she returning the gesture. I turned a bit, once again facing the sunset as she did the same, moving a bit closer till our legs were touching and her shoulder rested against my ribs. I lifted an arm, smiling to myself in disbelief as she allowed me to wrap my arm about her shoulders, pulling her even closer. I was on the way to fainting when she wrapped her arm around my back, returning the half-hug.
I stared off across the sea at the beautiful scenery before us, although I wasn’t really seeing any of it, for my mind was more focused on the blonde girl sitting beside me.
Was… what were we now? A- a couple…?
The words girlfriend tickled Hiccup’s tongue, urging him to try it out but he being much to shy to do so before his new… before Astrid. He bit his lip, going a bit rigid when Astrid sighed and leaned in even more, her head now resting comfortable against his shoulder.
We’ll figure it out later. Hiccup resolved, taking up the courage to tuck a finger on her chin and tilt her head, pressing his lips against hers once more. Again, tingles of joy and mere disbelief ran through him, but this time he didn’t daze out quite as much. He was now able to focus and kiss her back, enjoying every moment.
“We can’t take a chance on anyone doing anything different- including us!” I held out my hand, a little pang in my heart as I spoke the words. I- I didn’t want it like this… I want to be able to kiss her whenever, I want the gang to know, I want my Dad to know… and the thought of her leaving without a kiss was starting to throb painfully against my chest.
Astrid stared at my hand for a moment, and I began to have a sinking feeling of despair in the pit of my stomach. Was holding hands evengoing to be forbidden?
She gripped my arm quickly, making me give a little jump of surprise. But she didn’t seem to notice for she dragged me closer, her other hand going up to cup my jaw as she firmly pressed her lips against mine. I just stood rigid for a second in surprise… then I melted into the kiss and hand hold, lifting my free and unoccupied hand to grab her arm.
She pulled away all too soon, giving me a smile before turning and heading towards Stormfly. I watched her go, grinning like a dazed fool while she climbed up into the saddle.
“You seriously thought I’d leave here with just a handshake?” she called out before the two took off, leaving me staring after them like the love-struck fool that I was.
Toothless trotted up, circling me while crooning words of question, probably wondering why in the world Astrid and I kept… well, pressing our mouths together. Poor dragon was probably quite befuddled by the whole situation.
“She’s something else, huh bud?” I said quietly, while Toothless just barked in reply. I swung my leg into the saddle and we took off in pursuit of my… of my girlfriend.
I’d never felt so… so lost before…
Kneeling there watching the bubbling of the lava, where a living human being had just disappeared moments before… it sent a chill up my spine- one of grief and shock. I couldn’t believe what had just happened.
“Viggo… it didn’t have to end this way.” I whispered, slowly getting back to my feet, my eyes never leaving the pond of lava.
“Are… are you okay?” Astrid asked softly, coming up behind me.
“Yeah… I’ll be fine.” I replied dismally.
Astrid shifted slightly, “It’s finally over…” I didn’t reply, thoughts still flipping through my brain. “It is over… right?” she asked again, voice tight and worried.
“Yeah… of course…” I turned away, finding myself unable to stand there any longer. It kept bringing… unpleasant thoughts. But… Viggo was finally gone… “Definitely.” I added firmly.
“I should’ve listened to you.” Astrid said, “You are our leader, and our relationship can’t get in the way of that. It won’t happen again.”
“Just promise me you won’t stop telling me what you’re thinking.” I said, “Astrid I rely on you… that’s what makes us… well, us!” I added the last part with a smile, finding my worries slowly drain away. Astrid was so good at doing that, at making me realize the more important things in life. “Deal?” I once again held out my hand, waiting for her to let a little tease slip, but all she did was clasp my hand in both of hers, pulling me closer.
“Deal.” She repeated, drawing my lips to hers. I was still surprised- a bit shocked even, because… well, the gang was standing right over there, but I didn’t hesitate to kiss her back, pulling back slightly so I could take the reigns of the kiss.
We pulled away, smiling at each other while the others gave little gasps from behind them. I turned to see Snotlout jump off Hookfang, looking amazed and excited.
“Everything!” Ruffnut finished with a little wave of her hands. Tuffnut looked confused as he held out his arms in gesture. “Wait- so does this mean you’re not dying?”
I blinked in confusion, but passed it off easily and turned back to my girl, smiling brightly. Hopefully- now that they knew- we could kiss more often in front of the others without worry.
I squeezed her hand a bit tighter, and she squeezed mine in return.
The future awaited, and I was now certain that we’d make it every step of the way, as long as I had my dragon, girlfriend, and friends by my side.
Filling the prompts “one shot of Van coming home from tour to find Y/N asleep
on the sofa,” “something like Van singing to you before bed?
cute/fluffy please,” and
"Van coming home from tour to the apartment you live in together to find you’ve dyed your hair pink while he was gone? (fluffy feels)” from @and-we-turn-green
Headlights illuminated the room for a brief moment. It
was not enough to wake you. Asleep on the couch you were dreaming of a baby
girl in a Halloween costume. She wanted to go as an alligator. “Like
Daddy’s music book,” she said. Nobody could figure out where she learnt
about Halloween. The lock on the front door clicked, and you stirred. He was
early; not due home until the morning. Still in a state of altered
consciousness, not fully awake, you couldn’t move. Sleep was still paralysing
you, but it wasn’t scary anymore. You listened as Van crept through the hallway
and looked for you in the bedroom. The light in the kitchen went on and it cast
a glow in the front lounge room too. Boots off, Van’s quiet footsteps
approached. He dropped softly to his knees and brushed his fingers through your
“Darlin’,” he whispered. You made a small
squeaking sound. Van leaned in and kissed your cheekbone. “I’m home,”
he announced quietly. You could smell him. An unfamiliar shampoo, but easily
recognisable cigarette brand. Underneath that, the humanness of him. The innate
scent he was born with, like all people were. “Your hair is pink,”
“Mmmhmm.” You opened your eyes. The room
wasn’t bright, so it didn’t hurt. Van was mostly shadow and silhouette, but his
eyes sparkled still, reflecting what little light was in the room. He was
looking at your hair, still brushing it out. “Do you like it?” you
asked. He nodded and smiled.
“I do. You look like candy floss,” he replied.
You smiled. It was quiet in the house. You could hear the clock ticking in the
kitchen, and the breeze moving the wind chime outside. A floorboard creaked
under Van’s weight. Everything was still. Van leaned down and kissed your face
again. “Can we go to bed?” When you nodded he stood up and held out
both hands. Moving slowly, you sat up and let your brain settle for a moment.
He pulled you up and led you through the house. Walking down the hallway Van
started to speak again. “Kitten’s nose. Strawberry milkshake. Your cheeks
after a shower. And your favourite lipstick.” He was listing pink things.
“Them teacup pigs we saw on the internet. Flamingos. Clefairy and
Jigglypuff. Larry’s favourite donuts.”
In the bedroom you crawled straight under the covers.
You were already wearing pyjamas; one of Van’s old shirts, and underwear. Van
stripped down quickly, pulling track pants on over his underwear. He never
slept in shirts. Combined you wore an entire outfit. In bed too, he pulled you
close and you wrapped yourself around him.
“I missed you,” you whispered.
“I missed you too, darlin’. It’s getting harder,
isn’t it?” You nodded as you played with his necklace. “Maybe you
start comin’ with us more. Lots of room on the bus. Yeah?” You nodded
again. Wherever in the world Van was, that’s where you belonged too. “Your
hair smells different,”
“It’s the dye,”
“I can do yours if you want,” you said,
looking up at him. He smiled down at you.
“Don’t think I can pull it off like you can.”
Your bodies settled in, missing each other and happy at
the reunited contact. Sleep started to find you again. You were more warm and
comfortable than you had been in weeks, and in that your mind wanted to shut
down and stay. “Van? Sing for me?”
He was quiet for a moment, thinking of a song. Not
needing to say ‘yes’ because of course he would, you waited for him to start.
“Love of mine, someday you will die but I’ll be close behind. I’ll follow
you into the dark.” A song you had cried to and loved to too many times to
count. You’d be asleep before he finished. “No blinding lights or tunnels
to gates of white. Just our hands clasped so tight, waiting for the hint of a
spark.” Maybe you were exhausted from the poor sleep you got when Van
wasn’t home. Maybe you were happy to have him back. Maybe you were so
overwhelmed with love that your body needed to produce a physical manifestation
of that. Whatever the reason, a tear formed and dripped down your cheek.
“If Heaven and Hell decide that they both are satisfied, illuminate the
Nos on their vacancy signs. If there’s no one beside you when your soul
embarks, then I’ll follow you into the dark.”
and it’s a(n almost) birthday fic for @kentpurson, who, like me, is a total sucker for nurseydex
anyway, remember that tweet where nursey was like “would you sing for me” and dex was like “no” and nursey was like “you’d totally sing for me” because i do and that’s what this is based on. and yes, the song in question is “i will follow you into the dark” by death cab for cutie because it’s so soft and i LIVE for soft dex. enjoy!
“You’d totally sing to me.”
“No, I wouldn’t.”
Nursey is lying across the gross couch in the Haus living room, eyes closed, head in Dex’s lap. “Yes, you would.”
Dex’s left hand brushes absentmindedly through Nursey’s curly hair while his right scrolls through his phone. “Nope.”
“And why not?” asks Nursey, grinning lazily. Early afternoon sunlight streams in through the window. He can feel it warm on his face, turning the view behind his closed eyelids red.
“Because I don’t sing,” replies Dex, thumb rubbing gently against Nursey’s cheekbone. Nursey can smell the laundry-clean scent of his flannel.
“You’ll sing for me one day, Poindexter,” Nursey says sleepily, reaching his hand up to lock his fingers with Dex’s. He can feel the shift of Dex’s stomach as he laughs.
Scenario where s and m bros find out their lover is pregnant but has been hiding it out of fear that they (the boys) won't be happy. Thisissospecificgg
Ayato: You had been throwing up for days on end. You KNEW you were pregnant, Ayato just thought you were dying.
“If you don’t stop that, I’m going to take you to a hospital- or- or something!” He said standing outside the bathroom door, hearing you puke your guts up.
“I’m fine…” you muttered.
“Fine?! You are not! This isn’t food poisoning or something simple, something is wrong.” He winced hearing you gagging.
“I-I’m alright…really.” You started to cough and gag again, but there wasn’t anything in your stomach to vomit up at this point.
“Pancake-?” He jiggled the door knob, “I know you haven’t eaten. Open the door, you need to see someone.”
“Because I’m pregnant!” You yelled. The jiggling stopped and it was silent.
“….(y/n).” He had opened the door, crouching beside you and pulling you to his chest.
“I’m sorry…” You sniffled.
“Sorry? There isn’t anything to be sorry about! You’re ill. But I’m happy. Yours truly is going to be the best Dad!”
Reiji: “Hmm…” Reiji was in his lab, working on something when he started to stare at you.
“What?” You asked, you sat reading a book. Reiji had been watching you very carefully lately, you felt like he knew…but hoped he didn’t.
“Hm? Oh, I was just in thought.” He shook his head and went back to his studies.
“What were you thinking about?” You tapped your foot, you were a bit more irritable ever since this all started.
“Nothing,” He smirked, “What’s got you so upset? Do you want to be pun-.” You stomped your foot at him.
“What? Punished? GOOD! JUST WHAT I WANT!” You crossed your arms and started to leave, but Reiji grabbed your and spun you around shoving you against the book case. It hurt but you didn’t have time to collect yourself as he pinned your shoulders against the case with bone breaking grip.
“I don’t know what in the world made you think you could take such a tone with me young lady. But if you ever talk to me like that again in such a manner-.” He clicked his tongue, squeezing harder.
“R-Reiji! Stop! I’m pregnant! Please stop!” You sobbed. Reiji immediately released you when ‘pregnant’ came out.
“You…are?” He looked down at your shaking frame, crying your eyes out.
“I-I didn’t want to tell you because I thought you’d hate me…” you hiccuped.
“I would never- no.” He stopped and hugged you close to his chest, “No, no, no dear. No.” His voice strained, “I would never hate you for such a thing. I’m quiet happy. I’ll have a little one to carry on what I do now if I’m ever gone.”
Kanato: *HE WOULD KICK YOU OUT. HAVE YOU MET KANATO?*
Shu: “Somethings…different.” Shu opened his eyes, you laying on his chest.
“What is it?” You asked.
“Your heartbeat sounds….weird.” He sits up, “Are you alright? Something sounds wrong. Very wrong.” Little did you know, being a vampire- Shu had some good hearing. He heard something faintly, either there was a second heartbeat…or you were about to have some serious heart problems.
“My heartbeat? What’s wrong with it?” You put your hand over your chest.
“Oh,” he smirked, “It’s not coming from there.” He realized what it was and slowly slid his hand down to your stomach, “It’s…here.” Shu chuckled, “I’m going to be a Father, aren’t I?”
“…..” Tears filled your eyes and you nodded, he was happy and that’s all you wanted to know.
Laito: “You’ve been drinking water all day, are you sick?” Laito handed you your 23rd glass of water for the day. You were exhibiting all the signs. Fatigue, missed period, frequent peeing, nausea, and swollen breast. You knew you were pregnant…the problem was telling Laito.
“No..just…thirsty I guess.” You sipped on the glass of water, but you still were thirsty.
“Mmm…I think you’re lying…You know I memorized your special time…and I haven’t picked up on the scent. Why is that..?” He crossed his arms, he looked like a Father scolding a child.
“I-I…” you sighed, “Laito…I’m pregnant..” You looked down at your feet, trying to avert his gaze.
“Ah! I’m going to be a Daddy!” He literally picked you up and swung you around, “The only downside to this is I have to stop calling you little Bitch.” he frowns.
Subaru: “Hey, wake up.” Subaru shook your sleeping figure, you had been sleeping until noon and he began to worry.
“No.” You snapped.
“Wha- hey, seriously- get up and walk, eat, talk, something! Are you depressed?” He moved closer.
“I said go NO!” you yelled and yanked the blanket over your head.
“Whoa- calm down.” he replied, “Geez- women…”
“WHAT?!” You shot up, “What is that supposed to mean?!” You started to cry, “Does that mean you’re gonna go gay and leave me? Am I that bad?” You cried louder, you weren’t in control of your emotions lately, and Subaru had noticed.
“What the hell?! No- I’m not going to leave you for a guy.” He hugged you, “Please stop that. What’s wrong?”
“I’m pregnant…” You whined.
“Oh…Oh. That’s what’s been going on.” he stroked your head.
“You aren’t mad?” You asked.
“No. Not at all. I’m happy, I love you.” He blushed.
Ruki: “Livestock,” Ruki cleared his throat, “I think you need to slow down. You’re going to get sick eating so much.” You were scarfing down food like a starving animal, not caring what he thought. You were so hungry!
“What?” You swallowed, “Is that a way of saying I’m fat?” You glared.
“No, I’m just saying that you’ll get sick if you keep eating so much.” He ignored your snarky comment, eating his own meal.
“It is too! That’s why you call me Livestock, isn’t it!?” you slammed your silverware on the table, “Well heads up idiot! If this is how you see me then I don’t want to bring our baby into this world!” You let the words leave your mouth before you could stop them. You clasped your hands over your mouth, eyes widening.
“Our baby?” He set his silverware down and wiped his mouth, “Are you…pregnant?” He stood up slowly, looking shocked for once.
“I..maybe! But still-.” You backed up a little, terrified as Ruki slowly walked towards you.
“I’m so…happy.” He grabbed your wrist yanking you forward into his arms. Happy.
Kou: “Kouuuuu! Can we go shopping later, I need new jeans.” You squeezed yourself into your tight fitting jeans, pregnancy making it harder for you to fit in them.
“Huh? I just bought you jeans, What happened?” He peeked into your room and his eyes widened, “Oh my gosh…” He whispered.
“U-Uh…get out!” You yanked your shirt down, covering your stomach.
“You can’t hide that from me (y/n) I know what a baby bump looks like when see one!” Kou yanked your shirt up and placed his hand on your stomach, his hands were so warm.
“You aren’t mad…?” You swallowed.
“Let’s go get new jeans!” He cried, running out the door happier than ever. Guess not.
Yuma: “Oi sow, you okay?” Yuma watched you cringe as you walked around the mansion, holding your arms to your chest. Your boobs hurt with every step. You knew why, but you just didn’t want to tell Yuma.
“Y-Yeah…” You winced and moved your arms, it hurt so bad.
“O-Oi!” He turned red.
“What..?” You asked tilting your head.
“You aren’t wearing a bra…heh.” Yuma took it the wrong way and walked up, roughly grabbing one of your breast and squeezing. Instead of a moan or a mewl, he got a cry of pain and let go.
“Ow! Y-Yuma that hurt!” You hissed and covered your chest again.
“You’re the one who isn’t wearing a bra!” He looked slightly concerned, “You..alright sow?”
“Yeah, It’s just the first few weeks I think..” You sighed and then realized what you said.
“Weeks? Weeks of what?” He asked.
“Of…pregnancy.” You whimpered looking up at him. Yuma didn’t take but a split second to smile ear to ear and hug you super tight.
“I’m going to have a piglet!” He chuckled.
“Yuma- boobs!” You cried.
Azusa: “What’s wrong?” Azusa watched you go pee for like the 14th time that day.
“Just have to pee.” You squeaked as you ran to the bathroom again.
“Hmm…are you…pregnant?” He asked.
“What?! How did you-.” You wanted to hide, but he hugged you.
“I knew for a while…now…I can hear…the heartbeat….” He nuzzled your neck.
Sorry it took so long! This was at the bottom of the Ask box and took a little longer to write! Always remember the Ask box is open and never be scared to ask! -Admin Sophie
“Love of mine, someday you will die but I’ll be close behind and I’ll follow you into the dark. No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white, just our hands clasped so tight, waiting for the hint of a spark. If heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied and illuminate the no’s on their vacancy signs. If there’s no one beside you when your soul embarks, then I will follow you into the dark…”
A Couple Aesthetic for Ella Howlett and David Haller (Hypno and Legion), portrayed by Anna Kendrick and Dan Stevens. Made by the Mun Behind Ella.
Summary: Anon Request:
really romantic Cas and reader smut where they both lose their
virginity on their wedding night? Lots of fluff?
Doing a part 2, that will contain the smut, so enjoy this fluff!
“You look beautiful, Y/N” Sam stood at the doorway in a white
dress shirt that was tucked into black slacks, hands tucked into his
pockets. His long brown locks combed back. You smile at your friend,
before turning back to the full length mirror in front of
you.Everything was so last minute, so you rushed to the nearest
vintage store with Charlie, trying to find the perfect dress. It took
three different stores, before you found a black sleeveless vintage
dress with a lace peter pan collar. Charlie loved it right away but
wondered if you should be wearing white, “Aren’t you a virgin?
Shouldn’t you wear white?” Shrugging as you held the dress up to
your body, “Traditonally yes. But Cas and I are far from
traditional. I mean we are virgins, but he’s an angel and I’m a
hunter..” Your redheaded best friend agreed as she called to one of
the workers, asking for a fitting room.
“I’m nervous Sammy” You admit to the younger Winchester, combing
a finger through your wavy locks. Smoothing down the dress with your
hands, Sam walks over to you. Putting his hand on your shoulder,
“Don’t be. It’s a happy day. Are you ready?”Exhaling and giving
yourself a last look over, you nod. Sam smiles wide, holding out his
arm. “Let’s go beautiful”. The two of you walk out of your room
and down the hall of the bunker. Charlie, Ellen and Jo had decorated
the whole main area of the bunker, it wasn’t some big extravaganza,
but simple. Entering the room, you gripped Sam’s arm tight. Most of
the furniture was moved out, enough to make room. Chairs were
aligned, facing the stair case of the bunker that lead to the front
door, where Balthazar stood. He volunteered to officiate the wedding,
because he had always taken a liking to you. The Death Cab for Cutie
song that you picked out played softly in the background, as Sam lead
you towards everyone.
«Love of mine, some day you will die, but I’ll be close behind
I’ll follow you into the dark
No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark»
Content Warning:smut, sex with a psycho if that’s a warning.
Being stuck in a prison with a witch/not witch who was kind of psychotic was even less fun than it sounded. Sure, he could be sweet sometimes. He could be very attractive 100% of the time. But when he got angry was when he got dangerous.
Kai was one of those people who had no handle on their anger. He could compose himself up until the point he snapped, but when he did, he snapped.
I hate to admit it, but I loved seeing him angry. He was hot when he was angry. I know, it sounds like a death sentence. But he wouldn’t kill me. Hurt me, maybe. But not to the point where I could die. I loved provoking him. He was used to my games by now, but they still affected him.
Characters: Reader (Y/N),
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester
Paring(s): Reader (Y/N) × Dean Winchester
Word Count: 2,061 *whoop! whoop!*
Warnings: major character death/reader death, angst, mentions of demons/Hellhounds, metions/descriptive of Hell/Purgatory, mentions of torture, bad decision making, more angst, extra angst, so. much. angst. Song Inspiration/Lyrics in the story
A/N: Wow, this is a lot longer than what I normally write. This is an original idea that I came up with and I just love this song so so much. I hope you enjoy it, but I just have to warn you that this contains major feels, which made ME cry and I’m the one who wrote it. There will be a part 2 (which I’m working on right now ^-^) from Dean’s P.O.V. I hope I don’t stab you in the feels too hard. ♡ ily and I’m so not sorry about this.
(Y/F/N) = Your Friend’s Name
It’s been 364 days. 364 days. 362 days since that werewolf hunt took a turn for the worst. 363 days since I decided I couldn’t handle it. 364 days since I kissed my soul goodbye. 365 days since Dean woke up and I told him he’d been out for 48 hours. One year of torturous countdowns up until this moment… and now I have just one day to live.
Love of mine
Someday you will die
And I’ll be close behind
To follow you into the dark
I couldn’t tell Dean or Sam. I couldn’t handle the disappointment on their faces. I’d been lying to them for a year about what really happened on that hunt. I never told them that Dean had died that day. I ‘forgot’ to mention the look on his face as I watched the werewolf rip his heart out of his chest. I kept quiet about the crossroads demon I made a deal with the very next night. If today was my last day on Earth, I was not going to ruin it by watching my friends pity me as I flinched every time I heard the tick of a clock.
No blinding lights
Or tunnels to gates of white
I know what’s going to happen. I’m going to Hell. Gigantic hounds only I can see will rip me limb from limb before dragging my soul to Purgatory. Darkness and anger will consume my being as I go through unbearable pain. All of it was worth it. Anything is worth watching Dean smile these past few months. The only regret is not being able to tell Dean that I love him. I love him and that is why I chose to sell my soul. To save him. It’s a small price to pay for making sure Sam has his brother. The only thing left to do was make an excuse to leave for tomorrow.
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for a hint of a spark
Taking a deep breath, I make my way to the Bunker’s library. Sam and Dean are both on laptops looking for a new case.
“Hey Y/N,” Dean says, not looking up from his screen.
“Hey,” I reply, walking to stand in front of the table the brothers are sitting at. “I just got a call from a friend of mine, Y/F/N. She’s another hunter… She needs some help on a case in Wichita. It should just be research and a salt ‘n’ burn. Pretty simple,” I lie.
“Oh, okay… Want some help?” Dean asks, looking up at me. I force myself not to get lost in his deep green eyes as I come up with an escape.
“Nah,” I shrug nonchalantly. “It’s just a two girl job.”
“Want some company on the drive down?” Sam asks, still researching.
“I can just take the Charger from the garage,” I offer.
“Sure?” Dean presses. I’m mentally fight with my cliché feelings for the man in front of me. I would love to spend my last few hours driving around with my boys. I would be so much happier sitting in the Impala, listening to classic rock and joking around with the Winchesters.
“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” I lie again. “I’ll see you guys in a couple of days.”
“Have fun,” Sam jokes, giving me a little wave. I want to walk over and hug him and cry. I want to tell him how much he means to me, and how thankful I am to have him as my best friend. I want to say goodbye properly, but I know any of these things would seem suspicious.
“I’ll walk you out,” Dean says, standing up. I walk with him to the garage, wishing I could tell him how I feel. I wish I could be honest with him. I just want to have a little more time with Dean.
In Catholic school
As vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised
By a lady in black
I shove my duffle into the trunk of the 1971 Charger and shut the lid. I only packed a bag so as to fool Sam and Dean. I can feel the eldest Winchester watching my every move as I prepare to leave the Men of Letters Bunker for the very last time.
“Are you sure ya’ don’t want me to come with you?” the hunter asks again.
“Dean, it’s just a salt ‘n’ burn. I’ll be fine.”
“I know you’ll be fine, but I’m bored,” he whines. “Me and Sammy can’t find any new cases; plus, I wanted to spend some time with you.” He gave me a puppy dog face, and I managed a small chuckle. “Y/N, let me come with you,” he practically begs.
“Why do you even want to come with me?”
And I held my tongue
As she told me, “Son,
Fear is the heart of love”
“‘Cause I like you, Y/N,” Dean grins. He took a step closer to me… very close. I found myself trapped between a rock and a hard place, or in this case, Dean and a classic car. “I thought it was kind of obvious. I guess I wasn’t conspicuous enough,” he chuckles lightly.
My mind took a moment to register what he was saying. Dean likes me? I felt like I had a billion butterflies in my stomach and my words got caught in my throat. It took a minute for my brain to catch up with reality before I felt like I was being stabbed straight through the heart. I remembered the real reason I was leaving and I forced a smile onto my face.
So I never went back
I didn’t know what else to do and I knew this was my last chance. I stepped up on my tiptoes and pressed my lips against Dean’s. Our lips began to move in sync while he pulled me flush against him. I felt his hands slide down to my waist and he rested them on my hips as I wrapped my arms around his neck. We stayed like that for what seemed like forever, and yet it didn’t seem like long enough.
Dean smiled at me when we pulled apart and says, “I’ll take that as an, ‘I like you too, Dean’,” he chuckles.
“I like you too, Dean,” I confirm.
“Still sure ya’ wanna go on the hunt alone, sweetheart?” My heart fluttered then broke all over again at the sound of my new petname.
“Yeah,” I nod. “I’ll see you soon.”
“Be safe, okay?”
“Okay,” I say, holding back a sigh.
“Call me if you anything.”
“Okay,” I say, climbing into the Charger. “Goodbye Dean.”
If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
I hold back hot tears as I pull out of the Bunker garage. I don’t know where I’m going now, but I know I have to get away. I look in my rear view mirror and see Dean smiling and waving at me as I drive away. Not being able to say goodbye properly breaks my heart.
My mind wanders as I keep my foot firmly pressed on the gas pedal. I don’t know how long I’ve driven, or how far, but I can’t bring myself to care anymore. All I can think of is Dean. Dean Winchester. My Dean. His laugh. The way he gets those crinkles by his eyes when he smiles. His stupid, corny jokes. His beautiful green irises. His ridiculous attachment to his car. The childlike face he has when I made pecan pie. His warm hugs. His deep voice. His lips.
How will Dean handle the relization that I’m gone? What about Sam? Or Cas? I wrote them a note on my bed, telling them how much I care about them all, and that this wasn’t their fault. I begged them not to make any deals for me.
I turn the radio on, going to take my mind off the Winchesters. As if fate was playing a cruel trick on me, ‘Carry On’ by Kansas started to play. Thr floodgates burst as the guitar solo started. This was— is one of Dean’s favorite songs. I choke back a sob as tears stream down my face.
I shakily reach out and change the station. Trying to even my breathing, I hear Ben Gibbard’s voice drift from the speaker as ‘I Will Follow You Into the Dark’ by Death Cab for Cutie starts. “How appropriate,” I think, chuckling weakly.
Illuminate the “No’s” on their vacancy signs
My thoughts lead me to the night Dean told me about his time in Purgatory. It had been three months since he’d gotten rid of the black eyes, and the Mark was passed on to another unfortunate soul. Sam had been out on a solo hunt and Dean and I were asleep in our respective beds.
I remember hearing the elder Winchester’s screams, and I jumped into action, sprinting to his room. When I got there, Dean was thrashing around on his bed, entangled in his sheets. I ran to his side, shaking him and yelling— no, begging him to wake up.
“Dean! Dean! Wake up! It’s just a dream, Dean, wake up! Please, wake up!”
The hunter shot upward in his bed, breathing heavily. He tackled me to the ground in a crazed daze, his hands closing around my neck. Dean studied me with an feral look in his eyes before coming back to his senses and releasing me. He ran a hand through his hair, an anxious habit of his I’d noticed.
“Y/N… Y/N, I’m sorry… I’m so sorry. I jus— I just thought—”
“Dean, it’s okay. It’s okay now,” I replied breathlessly.
We sat in silence for what seemed like a lifetime. I slowly got up from the floor and sat myself next to him.
“You— do you want to… to tell me about it? It might help to talk,” I whispered.
“It was about my time in Hell,” he says, almost inaudibly. “I’m not sure you really wanna hear about that…”
He wouldn’t meet my eyes as he fidgeted next to me, anxiously carding a hand through his hair again. “Dean, you know you can tell me anything,” I assure him, trying to soothe him by rubbing a hand on his back.
Dean sniffled before letting his head hang defeatedly. “I— the demons… Alistair… they tourtured me for, well, for what felt like years. A month here is like a decade down there. I took on their pain for 30 years… Then, I just— I jus—,” he started to sob. “I broke…” He looked at me with tear filled eyes. “I gave in… They… they made me… I tourtured and killed so many… so, so many,” he practically whimpered, voice cracking.
I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and he sobbed into my neck. He clung to me tightly like a child to a security blanket. I’d never seen Dean that broken before.
If there’s no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Now I know what’s coming for me. Torture. Pain. Killing. Anger. Hatred. I don’t know how long I will last, but I know I have to hold on as long as possible for Dean.
After crossing the state border into Oklahoma, I found an isolated forest area and pull over. Turning off the car, I put the keys behind the sun divider and get out, leaving any and all of my remaining possessions behind. I start my journey deeper into the woods.
I have no idea how far I’ve walked. The world around me numbs. Suddenly, loud howling rang in my ears as I stop in my tracks. I know it’s the Hellhounds. It’s over.
I will follow you into the dark
Unbearable pain ripped through my body as the smoky black hounds tear my body apart. My life flashes before my eyes while screams pass through my lungs. The last thing I remember is Dean’s smile, before everything went black.
@justanother-nephilim-wolf requested: “Can u do a part 2 of your “selfish” Drabble? Like maybe Jace talking to Alec about if he wants immortality?”
@nico-di-lightwood requested: “How about Alec having to choose to save either Jace or Magnus?”
Not exactly what you requested, @nico-di-lightwood but since Alec chooses Jace canonically, I decided to run with that, and smoosh together these two prompts… Sequel to Selfish.
“Have you ever considered becoming immortal? You know, for Magnus,” Jace asks. This thing has been bothering him ever since Isabelle brought it up and he really needs to know the answer.
They’re in the smaller of the two kitchens at the Institute, the private family one, and Alec’s cooking, which is always a treat. The smells wafting through the room are already making Jace’s mouth water. But after Jace’s question, Alec takes the pan off the stove, apparently to give Jace his undivided attention.