just mah life shit

Throughout my childhood I used to make boxes for events or times in my life. So for a birthday or christmas I’d take a shoebox and put cards in it, a candle, some decorations that kind of thing. I just found my hidden store of all these boxes from my life while I’m home here for Christmas break. Each one of them is a story, a smile, a heartbreak.

This is the smallest box of them all. “WA” is written neatly on the top. I grew up in Washington state, and apparently I made a box for it when I moved to Nevada. This box contains 1 lost button from a coat my mom made me, a chunk of bark from our yard that I carved, a miniature clay pot, crumpled dollars, and coins from the Dominican Republic, a tiny box labeled ‘Toothfairy Box’, a luggage tag, a packet of pink dianthus seeds, and the metal address numbers from my old house.

It’s strange to see these things sitting, old and useless, in a little box. They used to be part of my life. It’s an odd thing, isn’t it? To see the your life frozen in the past? These things have no present meaning, it’s just the memories of a far-off past that give them the kind of simple value that brings a smile to my face. It’s rather like seeing people I used to know, or driving the streets of a town that used to be mine, or sleeping in the empty room that used to be full. Eh…I’ll be glad when we have visitors and this house is full of talking and stories and laughter.

Just gonna put this here so I remember

I’m so tired of our culture’s weird obsession with longterm monogamy. Understanding that the people you date are human is important, sure, but not everyone wants to find/date a partner for the the rest of their lives and that doesn’t inherently make those relationships less real, meaningful, or good, right? I mean short term relationships (1-3 years) aren’t just relationships of “convenience” or staying together because it’s more fun/secure/interesting/ than being single. I’m not convinced that every relationship should be a part of some grand Search for The One. Each relationship has individual value, regardless of how long it is or if it’s contributing to finding some magical unicorn of a person called The One. I also don’t see staying in a relationship even though you know you won’t be together forever as a sin or something inherently wrong. Most relationships are going to be short and not last forever and that’s actually okay I think. Those relationships can still be valuable and good regardless of their length, and don’t have to be considered “failures” for having been ended.